Work Text:
If Tang Rou could pick an emotion to describe how she was feeling right now, she’d pick anger. If she could, she’d take Cui Li, Liu Hao, and all their greasy little guild minions, and sock ‘em right across the face.
The thought of it was incredibly appealing—all of them cowering under desks and behind fancy gamer chairs at the true rage of the battle goddess—but Tang Rou boxed away her little fantasy and forced herself to take deep, even breaths. She knew what would happen if she showed up to the meeting angry.
“You’re being too emotional,” they’d say, as if she didn’t have a perfectly good reason to be emotional.
“How can you lead the team if you can’t keep ahold of yourself?” they’d ask, as if she hadn’t been leading the team to the playoffs and beyond for the past seven years.
“Better to give the captain’s position to a man instead,” they’d declare, as if this was only a natural conclusion.
Sometimes she asked herself if things would have turned out differently if she'd been a different kind of woman. Would this have happened if she’d been less stubborn? Would this have happened if she’d wielded more soft power instead of her authority as captain? Would this have happened if she let Tao Xuan make money off her face and body instead of keeping her image private? Maybe, or maybe not. Ultimately, this was a futile thought experiment. Perhaps there would have been less enmity and resentment, but in the end, this all boiled down to power and pride. Given the same team environment, Tang Rou had no doubt the same thing would have happened no matter what kind of person she’d been.
Still, Tang Rou had her own pride as captain of three-time championship team Excellent Era and one of the pioneers of the professional scene. She did not want to give them the satisfaction of using the same old sexist excuses.
So Tang Rou entered the meeting with a straight face. She did not punch anyone and gave up her captain’s position, her livelihood, and her beloved account card without a fight. Then she packed up the rest of her stuff, dropped off her card key at the front desk, and walked out the front door.
“Rourou...” Mucheng whispered, fingers tugging at Tang Rou’s winter jacket. Her breath showed in little puffs of condensate in the cold December air. It was already starting to snow. “You really don’t want to stay?”
In front of the younger girl’s worry, Tang Rou couldn’t help but show Mucheng a soft smile. She patted Mucheng’s head gently. “It’s okay. I already told Guoguo I would be going over.”
At Tang Rou’s insistence, more tears pooled in Su Mucheng’s eyes. “This whole thing is so unfair! I wish...”
Tang Rou pulled Su Mucheng into a hug. “We can’t help what’s already been decided on. Don’t worry about me. I’ll rest a year, then come back.”
Mucheng clung to her tightly. “Text me when you get there,” she murmured into Tang Rou’s shoulder.
“I will.”
With that, Tang Rou disappeared into the snow, heading to the one place she knew would welcome her with open arms.
***
When Tang Rou entered Happy Internet Cafe, Chen Guo was already waiting for her by the front desk. Wordlessly, she wrapped Tang Rou in a hug. Tang Rou let herself sink into the warmth.
She’d met Chen Guo a few years ago by chance, and Chen Guo had—once she’d gotten over being completely starstruck—quickly become one of Tang Rou’s closest friends and confidants. There was just something about Chen Guo that made her easy to open up to: the way she so openly expressed her joys and frustrations, the way she cried for Tang Rou after learning about her situation, the way she unhesitatingly offered Tang Rou a place to stay when things came to their inevitable head. Tang Rou was filled with so much gratitude to have met a friend like Chen Guo.
When they pulled apart, Chen Guo took Tang Rou’s hands, trying to warm up her cold fingers. “I’m so sorry, Xiao-Tang. I’m so angry and frustrated for you. I can’t imagine how it must feel.”
Tang Rou showed her a half-joking, half-bitter smile. “I’m angry too.”
“Oh, those Excellent Era goons are so… ugh! It really makes me want to beat something up!” Chen Guo’s eyes lit up. “I know, let’s blow off steam in the tenth server together!”
Tang Rou blinked. “The tenth server?”
“It opens tonight! Won’t it be a perfect distraction?” Chen Guo eagerly asked.
Tang Rou glanced around the internet cafe. Indeed, colorful posters and cardboard cut-outs were scattered around the lobby, advertising Glory’s ninth anniversary and the opening of the tenth server. The cafe was buzzing with energy. Glory fans were everywhere, talking in excited whispers, fighting PVP matches, and running dungeons while they waited for the midnight release. Seeing such genuine enthusiasm made bittersweet nostalgia well up in her chest.
“Let’s do it,” Tang Rou agreed. “I... I’ll need a new account card though.” Her fingers trembled at the reminder of Rising Dawn, her trusty partner of ten long years, but Rising Dawn didn’t belong to her anymore. She’d given him to Sun Xiang earlier that night.
Chen Guo pulled a card from a drawer at the front desk and handed it to Tang Rou. Tang Rou ran her thumb over the pristine plastic. The card was brand new, unmarred by the wear and tear that came from years of use.
“What will you name your character?” Chen Guo asked.
Tang Rou thought for a moment. She could make another avatar that looked just like Rising Dawn, but maybe... it would be fun to main a female character this time.
“Soft Mist,” she decided. “I’ll make her a battlemage.”
“I’m making a new account too,” Chen Guo told her. She rubbed her hands together eagerly. “Let’s get through the tutorial quickly and then we can do all the fun stuff like beating up bosses and bullying noobs.”
At Chen Guo’s wicked expression, Tang Rou had to laugh. Ah, how fun it was, to be able to play Glory with friends.
***
The night was fruitful. Level 15 and three first kills was not too shabby if Tang Rou said so herself. She’d even gotten a skillbook drop and a few rare materials she could use to craft a silver weapon.
Chen Guo had gone to bed sometime in the early hours of the morning, but Tang Rou, absorbed in the game as she was, had continued to play until the sun rose.
She yawned as she typed out her goodbyes to the dungeon party she’d been with. Though there’d been a few little hiccups in the beginning with them assuming she was a newbie player who wanted to be carried, by the end of the night they’d all been enamored by her show of skill and agreed to meet up in the future.
Compared to pro battles, this early game content was a breeze, but playing it had truly allowed her to sink back into the flow state where she could let go of her anger. In the game, all that mattered were the enemies in front of her and the rhythm of her controls.
At around 10 AM, Chen Guo emerged from upstairs as Tang Rou was wrapping up her gaming session. “Xiao-Tang, good morning! How far’d you get?”
Tang Rou yawned her reply. “Three first kills, look.” She moved her chair a little to let Chen Guo see the record boards. Under each boss, Soft Mist’s name was written along with the names of her other party members.
“Xiao-Tang, that’s amazing!” Chen Guo gushed. “We have to celebrate.” She grabbed a nearby employee who was passing by on his way upstairs and fished out her wallet. “Ye Xiu, go buy breakfast from down the street for everyone!”
“Ehhh?” the guy named Ye Xiu complained. He looked maybe a few years younger than Mucheng, but unlike Mucheng, he had a bored and listless expression. “Boss, my shift’s over. I’m heading to bed.”
“Hey, don’t just skip meals willy-nilly,” Chen Guo nagged. “This is part of your compensation too, you know. And it’s a special occasion! Now go!”
Ye Xiu sighed and took the money. “Yes, Boss.” He slowly trudged out the door.
Tang Rou turned to Chen Guo once he’d left. “Who’s he?” she asked.
Chen Guo plopped down in the chair beside her. “That’s Ye Xiu, our newest night manager. He’s staying in the storage room of my apartment until a vacancy opens up in the employee housing, so you’ll probably see him around. He said he left home after dropping out of college or something. He’s a good kid, but he’s a little arrogant just ‘cause he’s beaten some veterans in a bunch of different games,” Chen Guo harrumphed. “You should beat him up a few times and kick him down a notch!”
“I see,” Tang Rou said thoughtfully. From the way she was speaking, it seemed like Ye Xiu had beaten Chen Guo a couple times too. She could afford a match or two to avenge her good friend.
When Ye Xiu returned with the food, he joined the two of them and the other night shift employees for a quick meal.
Chen Guo held up her glass to celebrate Tang Rou’s accomplishments. “To our Xiao-Tang’s three first kill records!”
“Cheers!”
Tang Rou smiled softly as everyone raised a toast. It had been a while since she’d been able to celebrate something trivial like this. While she had always been proud of her own achievements and had never needed anyone’s approval, she was aware that recently, she had started to downplay her accomplishments as an attempt to get her teammates’ cooperation.
As the cheers turned into quiet chitchat and Chen Guo’s loud bragging that Tang Rou was her friend, Tang Rou turned to the young man sitting beside her. “I heard you’re good at games too. Do you play Glory?”
Ye Xiu shrugged. “I thought I’d try it during the new server opening, but I don’t really see what all the hype’s about. It’s kind of an easy game, isn’t it?”
Tang Rou’s eyes flashed, though her voice remained steady. “If that’s what you think, then you really know nothing about Glory.”
“Oh yeah? Sounds like you wanna fight?” Ye Xiu smirked.
Tang Rou agreed easily. “Sure. Keep leveling to level 20, then let’s compare notes.”
Ye Xiu nodded, and Tang Rou made a mental note not to beat him up too badly. Good at games or not, she didn’t make a habit of crushing newbies—unless they were really, horribly toxic, of course. But the look in Ye Xiu’s eyes told her he was not that kind of person. Sure, he seemed a bit overconfident as Chen Guo had mentioned, but Tang Rou could tell he was the competitive type—one who didn't care who or what he was up against as long as it entailed the thrill of a good challenge—and that was a kind of person that Tang Rou did not dislike.
Breakfast was cleared away quickly, and soon, the other employees left to head to the dorms while Tang Rou and Ye Xiu headed upstairs to Chen Guo’s apartment. They parted ways in the hallway with a nod.
Tang Rou fell asleep looking forward to Soft Mist’s development and thinking about the way Ye Xiu reminded her of a different boy who had also been competitive and so very good at games...
***
Tang Rou woke at around 9 PM. After washing up and changing into a comfortable pair of leggings, a T-shirt, and sweater, she headed downstairs.
To her surprise, the cafe was oddly quiet. She quickly found out the reason why when she reached the first floor. It seemed most people had left their computers to gather around the projector screen. Tang Rou waited quietly to see what program they were watching. She felt her breath hitch when a familiar face filled the screen.
Battlemage Rising Dawn.
It was a program about her—a reel of her most impactful moments: important plays, important kills, scenes of Rising Dawn in his purple and gold armor dominating the field, wielding his spear against the backdrop of a blood-orange sun coming up over the horizon.
Shown on such a large projection screen, he felt so lifelike. Rising Dawn, her partner and her alter-ego. In many ways, he was the person she felt she was—the person she could be without any limits: fierce and loyal, steady and true, unyielding and unwilling to give up until the very last second.
Scene after spectacular scene played on the projector, making Tang Rou’s heart throb. Finding that tears were coming to her eyes, Tang Rou quickly brushed through the crowd to find some space. She bumped into Chen Guo on the way.
“Xiao-Tang!” Chen Guo looked at her with panicked eyes. She glanced back and forth between Tang Rou and the projector screen. “I- I can change the channel if you want!”
Tang Rou shook her head and tried to force a smile. “It’s fine. Leave it up for the others. I think... I’m going to step out for a moment though.”
She pushed her way out of the internet cafe as the program cut to an interview of Misty Rain’s Captain, Chu Yunxiu. “Captain Tang is the reason I joined the pro scene. As the only female captain of the founding generation and an all-around amazing player, Captain Tang has inspired me so much...”
As soon as the doors closed behind her, Tang Rou crouched down on the sidewalk and tears came dripping down her face. All of the anger she’d held for the past few days, weeks, and months had been the driving force that kept her together and moving through all the challenges. Now that the anger had slipped away, there was nothing to keep the grief from pouring out.
In truth, she didn’t want to leave. She didn’t want to give up without a fight. She wanted the intensity and adrenaline of high-level matchups. She craved the glory of a victory hard-won. She wished she could keep playing Glory with Rising Dawn, Dancing Rain, and all of her pro-player friends and rivals.
She closed her eyes as a frigid wind whipped through her hair, sending snowflakes flying everywhere. As such, she didn’t see the person who came up to drape a jacket over her shoulders.
“Hey, don’t go catching a cold before our battle,” said Ye Xiu. He shuffled awkwardly next to her, pulling the hood of his hoodie tighter around his neck. “Damn, it really is cold tonight.”
Tang Rou rubbed her eyes with the heel of her palm. How embarrassing to be seen crying by someone younger. “You don’t have to give me your pity,” she told him. “I’m just a bit emotional. I could crush you anytime.”
He smirked. “Ha, I’ll look forward to it then.”
They both stayed silent for an awkward moment, staring at the neon Excellent Era sign across the street. Then Ye Xiu spoke again. “You’re sad because of that Glory player’s retirement, right?”
Tang Rou laughed bitterly. “Yeah, you could say that.”
“Well, you’d be far from the only one. Even the boss was bawling like a baby over her.”
She looked up at him with an incredulous expression. “Is that supposed to be comforting?”
He shrugged. “Hey, I’m just saying. If you’re sad, just cry. No use hiding it out here.”
Tang Rou huffed a breath of amusement. “You sure are one cheeky kid.”
Ye Xiu grinned. “So I’ve heard.” He stood up straight and brushed some stray snowflakes off his clothes. “Bring back my jacket when you’re done,” he said as he ducked back inside.
Tang Rou took another few minutes to watch the neon red of Excellent Era’s sun and stars burn through the night. Then, she too stood. Grief weighed heavy in her heart, but least for now, she was done crying.
***
Ye Xiu and Tang Rou’s scrimmage could not come fast enough for Chen Guo. She had been vibrating with excitement ever since she heard about it the previous day. Finally, after a few more dungeon clears, they both reached level 20.
“Go, Xiao-Tang! Beat him up good!” Chen Guo cheered.
Soft Mist was well on her way to becoming a proper battlemage. Though she didn’t yet have a full set of equipment, Tang Rou had decked out her skill tree with all the relevant level 20 skills and crafted herself a silver spear with the materials she’d gotten as first clear rewards.
Her equipment wouldn’t really matter though, since they were using fixed field for their duel. It was a plain circular arena, with no obstacles or cover, perfect for a straightforward test of skill.
She told Ye Xiu the room number and waited for him to load in.
To her surprise, she found his character was also carrying a spear. “Battlemage, huh?” she said with a grin.
One Autumn Leaf met Soft Mist at the center of the arena. “It’s the most popular class,” Ye Xiu said with a shrug. “And it looks cool.”
“The coolest,” Tang Rou agreed. She couldn’t wait to fully kit Soft Mist with a sick-looking armor set and upgraded weapon. “Feeling confident?” she asked.
Ye Xiu gave an experimental whirl of One Autumn Leaf’s purple spear. “I’d say so.”
“Then, why don’t we add stakes?” she asked. She put down a 100 yuan bill on the table.
Ye Xiu’s eyes gleamed. He pulled a crumpled bill out his pocket. “Winner takes all?”
Tang Rou nodded. Something like this was just for fun. She didn’t feel bad about taking his money since apparently he’d done something similar with the veterans he’d fought before.
With the prize pool set, Tang Rou started the battle.
“You can have first move,” she said graciously.
“Here I come!” Ye Xiu dashed forward to start with a Dragon Tooth.
Tang Rou stepped to the side and let the attack brush past her. Connecting her movements, she swung around to catch him in a Circle Swing, but he quickly rolled out of range. Fast reflexes, she noted.
As soon as he got up, Ye Xiu casted a falling flower palm, but Tang Rou was already gone, zigzagging her sprints to close in on him.
“That was a Z-shake!” Chen Guo exclaimed.
The moment Soft Mist’s spear made contact, it was all over. One Autumn Leaf was chained to death without a single chance to counterattack.
Tang Rou plucked the money from the counter. “Guoguo, gift for you. Thank you for letting me stay with you.”
Chen Guo squeezed her in a hug. “Xiao-Tang! You’re the best!”
Ye Xiu had yet to say anything after his defeat. He just stared at the screen where One Autumn Leaf lay fallen on the ground. Then he turned to Tang Rou. The easy grin on his face had been replaced by a determined look.
“Sis Tang, can I have a rematch?” He took out another crumpled bill and placed it on the table.
“Are you sure?” she asked. “Don’t be upset if you lose again.”
“I can’t go down like this,” he said.
“If you insist.” She smirked. Heh. Competitive types.
Tang Rou restarted the battle.
This time she went a little easier on him, letting him get a full combo in before she systematically shut each one down. She could practically see the gears turning in his mind as he tried skill after skill. But time and time again, Tang Rou read her opponent’s moves and blocked, dodged, or interrupted accordingly.
In the end, she was once again victorious.
“One more,” Ye Xiu demanded. He quietly deposited another crumpled bill on the table.
This third time around, Ye Xiu played a bit more cautiously, observing her movements instead of immediately attacking. Since he was so kindly giving her the initiative, Tang Rou lunged forward.
Double stab!
Ye Xiu parried the first strike with his spear—there was that lightning quick reaction speed again—but he failed to adjust when Tang Rou changed angles for the second stab.
In a desperate attempt to turn the tides, One Autumn Leaf suddenly sped up, throwing out a barrage of random attacks. Ye Xiu was essentially button-mashing as fast as he could, using skills as soon as they came off cooldown and jabbing in a normal attack when he had no skills left.
It wasn’t a bad strategy on his end. He’d accurately gauged that she had superior technique, so he wanted to try to brute force a win using hand speed. And he sure was fast. In terms of pure hand speed, he could probably go head-to-head with Tiny Herb’s speed demon, Liu Xiaobie. It would definitely be enough to overwhelm an ordinary player. Unfortunately for Ye Xiu, he was too unfamiliar with the game to make effective use of that speed. At the end of the battle, it was Soft Mist who stood above One Autumn Leaf's crumpled corpse.
“I think we should stop now,” Tang Rou said. “We could fight all night, but the results won’t change.”
“I disagree. One more time, please.” Ye Xiu laid down another bill.
They ended up fighting a few more rounds until Ye Xiu ran out of cash. He rooted around in his pockets but came up empty. “Do you take cigarettes?” he asked.
Tang Rou’s eyes narrowed. “Young people shouldn’t ruin their lungs by smoking.”
“So win and take them away from me,” Ye Xiu insisted.
Rather than fight again, Tang Rou plucked the cigarette box from his fingers and directly threw them in the trash.
“...”
“We don’t need to fight anymore,” she said.
Ye Xiu stared at her sullenly.
“You’re quite fast, that’s true. And it seems like you have a basic understanding of the different types of skills, likely from playing other games,” she told him. “But you don’t have nearly enough familiarity with the specifics—not the range, the cooldowns, the effects, nor how to counter them. Your tactics are rigid and predictable. And this is just a one-on-one mirror match. If we added in more people and more classes... Tell me, do you still think Glory is an easy game?”
Ye Xiu sighed and slumped into his chair. “You're not a normal player, are you?”
She gave him a consoling smile. “I’m not.”
“And you aren’t any old ‘Xiao-Tang’ either, are you?”
She grinned harder. “Looks like we have a smart cookie.”
Ye Xiu looked up to meet her eyes, and the fire igniting in his gaze made something alight in Tang Rou’s heart—a fuse that had almost fizzled out suddenly flickering back to life.
Ah, she realized. It was her determination. Silently, she made herself a promise: like a soft mist rolling over the hills at dawn, she’d creep her way back to the stage, quietly, inch by inch.