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  1. 51

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya is seen at a cafe, sexting someone other than his husband. Of course the internet explodes and Ilya makes it worse.

    OR

    Ilya never changed Shane’s contact name.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    980
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    733
    Bookmarks:
    50
    Hits:
    8,065
  2. *

    Tags
    Summary

    @shanehollander24_hockey✅
    It's true.

    ➤ @shaneybaby
    SIR WHAT IS TRUE????

    ➤@shanehollander24_hockey✅
    I'm engaged.
    @shaneybaby
    TO WHOM??
    ➤@shanehollander24_hockey✅
    t's for you all to figure out.

    OR

    @svetlana_v_✅

    ilya domestic ERA

    ➤ @ilyaaaaax81✅

    🤫

    @mlh_puckrabbit

    SIR CARE TO ELABORATE?

    @ilyaaaaax81✅

    no.

    @iloverozzyyy

    WHAT?

    @ilyaaaaax81✅

    no.

     

    exactly what the title says, followed by pure calculated chaos

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    37,466
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Comments:
    1,347
    Kudos:
    5,134
    Bookmarks:
    1,103
    Hits:
    98,924
  3. *

    Tags
    Summary

    Partying and pining in New York, situationship-era flirting, and semi-ironic marriage pacts.

    Just a day in the life of Ilya Rozanov.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,381
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    176
    Kudos:
    2,389
    Bookmarks:
    575
    Hits:
    30,788
  4. *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane Hollander was traded to the Ottawa Centaurs without ever being outed. His relationship with Ilya Rozanov is still a secret to most people.
    Everything was going just fine, until they both get added to the Centaurs WAGs group chat.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    50,881
    Chapters:
    35/35
    Comments:
    4,667
    Kudos:
    17,509
    Bookmarks:
    3,245
    Hits:
    437,877
  5. 65

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane buys a dildo and explores himself a little more.
    God, can you imagine what a nervous wreck he would be while he tried to make this purchase???

    Inspired by this passage in HR chapter 6:
    "Hollander sat up. 'I've played with it, all right? I've -- I've got a ... thing."
    "A thing?"
    "A dildo. Okay?"
    Ilya grinned so hard it hurt. "What color?"
    "Fuck you."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,915
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    35
    Kudos:
    552
    Bookmarks:
    64
    Hits:
    6,688
  6. *

    Words:
    162,729
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    666
    • 05 Jul 2026

      Public Bookmark

      Bookmark Notes:

      Read the fist part. Waiting on sequel

    • 05 Jul 2026

      Public Bookmark

    • 05 Jul 2026

      Rec

      Bookmark Notes:

      Mr Answer Man is part 1 of 3 books. Part 1 complete.
      Hollanov. If they talked more and fell in love much faster.
      If Shane's team didn't help him and showed their racism sooner, and Shane gets traded at the end of his 2nd year - that's where we end. Waiting for book 2.

    • 05 Jul 2026

      Public Bookmark

    • 05 Jul 2026

      Public Bookmark

      Bookmark Notes:

      2

  7. 3

    Tags
    Summary

    Thơm nhắn tin cho Thỏ lúc 3h sáng

    Language:
    Tiếng Việt
    Words:
    549
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    80
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    338
  8. *

    Tags
    Summary

    Léa Martin @MrsLéaMartin92
    Shane Hollander is TAKEN !?

    Clara @mrsshanehollander4ever
    Shane Hollander has a BABY????

    Léonie @LeonieGagnon27328
    Is this officially the NHL’s cutest baby?

    Lily @BostonLily1991
    DOES THE BABY HAVE FRECKLES?

    Charlotte @charlottefromquébec
    Replying to @BostonLily1991
    what?

    One month before the tuna melt incident, pictures are posted online of Shane and Hayden’s outing to the aquarium.

    Within minutes, the internet is convinced that Shane Hollander has become a father, and people everywhere are mourning the fact that the NHL’s most eligible bachelor is off the market.

    “People everywhere” includes Ilya Rozanov.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,352
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    152
    Kudos:
    4,579
    Bookmarks:
    716
    Hits:
    40,595
  9. *

    Tags
    Summary

    Lily (Hollander):

    I like freckles.

     

    Jackie (Pike):

    Awe that's kinda cute.

     

    Lily (Hollander):

    I like to look at Shane's freckles while he goes down on me.

     

    Jackie (Pike):

    Okay I take it back.

    Or, Ilya joins a WAG group chat.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,418
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    134
    Kudos:
    2,882
    Bookmarks:
    289
    Hits:
    21,894
  10. 93

    Tags
    Summary

    janetheloon
    I’ll try not to ask much about Russia or family from now on.

    lilybear
    You can distract me instead if you want to make it up to me? 🙂

    janetheloon
    I'm still saying no to sexting.

    lilybear
    Ugh shut up, I mean. Tell me something else. A show you watched, songs you like?

    janetheloon
    Hmm.
    Well, my cousin made me listen to an album by a boy band a while ago.
    And I guess it made me think of you?

    OR

    After Las Vegas, Shane and Ilya find a better way to communicate: talking via Instagram DMs and sending songs to each other. Here are snippets of their conversations as they fall in love.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,802
    Chapters:
    11/14
    Comments:
    189
    Kudos:
    384
    Bookmarks:
    92
    Hits:
    7,120
  11. *

    Tags
    Summary

    “I’m trying to figure out,” Rose wonders aloud. “Are you always a complete prick? Just with women? Or just when you lose a game?”

    Ilya barks a laugh, shocked and almost delighted, and his smile spreads wide enough that Rose can see all those pearly whites of his that are so much nicer than she expected any hockey player’s to be. “All the time,” he grins, “all the time. However much of an asshole Hollander has told you I am, double it.”

    She answers truthfully, shrugs her shoulders in her tiny silver dress. “He hasn’t mentioned you at all.”

    After a shitshow of an evening in a Montreal nightclub, Ilya wakes up the next morning in Shane’s bed. Only, he’s not in Shane’s bed — Rose Landry is, and he’s in Rose Landry’s body, and she’s in his. Well, what the fuck are they supposed to do with that?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    90,653
    Chapters:
    11/18
    Comments:
    1,325
    Kudos:
    1,731
    Bookmarks:
    623
    Hits:
    36,260
  12. *

    Tags
    Summary

    “We do not say anything about the Hollander situation,” LeClaire tells them even though it sounds like he’s already resigned to what he knows is going to happen.

    After all, Roz gets extremely mad whenever it’s brought up. Not that Cliff can blame him, he’s pretty sure that Roz liked Hollander before this (wouldn’t chirp him half as much if he didn’t). Finding out that he’s such a bastard must sting.

    Not to mention that Roz does not mess around with people that disrespect girls. Or women. Or kids. Or dogs. Or the elderly (excluding Scott Hunter). Or really anyone, if it’s for petty stupid reasons.

    “Of course,” Cliff agrees for both of them since Roz is still too busy texting someone.

    It’s apparently not good enough for LeClaire because he asks, “Roz?”

    “Just one second,” he answers without raising his eyes from his phone or stopping his typing. “Need to get my Jane to agree with something. She’s very stubborn.”

     

    Or. My take on the 'their text leak and now everybody thinks that Shane is an abusive bastard' premise. Featuring Ilya giving a presser, Marly realizing in real time who 'Jane' is and the internet reacting to the craziness.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,602
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    1,138
    Kudos:
    13,070
    Bookmarks:
    2,859
    Hits:
    149,795
  13. *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane Hollander is trying his best to keep everyone compliant with Health, Safety and Wellbeing standards at Centaurs by Design. Ilya Rozanov does his best to make Shane's job as difficult as possible.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    47,896
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    1,400
    Kudos:
    7,145
    Bookmarks:
    2,224
    Hits:
    145,743
    • 05 Jul 2026

      Rec

    • 05 Jul 2026

      Public Bookmark

    • 05 Jul 2026

      Public Bookmark

    • 05 Jul 2026

      Public Bookmark

      Bookmark Notes:

      You Have Six Outstanding Compliance Modules
      papisadhu
      Summary:
      Shane Hollander is trying his best to keep everyone compliant with Health, Safety and Wellbeing standards at Centaurs by Design. Ilya Rozanov does his best to make Shane's job as difficult as possible.

      Notes:
      So my friend came across a reel about HR and couldn't work out how it related to Heated Rivalry before they realised it was actually about Human Resources. She inspired me to write this and also beta-ed 💖 This was really just an excuse to make my fictional boys suffer The Real Horrors of HSW Compliance in the other HR.

      This fic is inspired by real things that I have endured in my jobs over the years although obviously everything has been fictionalised. I also want to note I only know how HSW Compliance works in Australia so let's just assume the OHS laws are the same in Canada for this fic. I will include a glossary of terms in the ending notes so hopefully it doesn't get too confusing.

    • 05 Jul 2026

      Public Bookmark

  14. *

    Words:
    26,347
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    172
  15. *

    Words:
    13,004
    Works:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    932
  16. 15

    Tags
    Summary

    Gordie (howe) God ☑️ @ilyaroz81
    Do not listen to Noah’s new music if you have a complicated family relationship, just trust me 😭

    Truly, Ilya did think Noah had some sort of recording device planted in his life because, what do you mean, all of these songs have related to him in numerous different ways. Why is every song about leaving or a toxic family? Can’t Noah just create a happy song about how great hockey is or something?

    Gordie (howe) God ☑️ @ilyaroz81
    I am willing and able to shove this stick down your throat @noahkahan

    Connors: ok so maybe take a break from twt at the moment
    Connors: or maybe the album

    * * *

    what if Noah Kahan had released the Great Divide during the Tuna Melt Breakup

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,908
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    135
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    1,512
  17. 56

    Tags
    Summary

    John gives Francesca his number, except he writes down Michaela's instead. Francesca texts the number without realizing she's talking to Michaela, not John. Confusion ensues.

    a texting fic

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,129
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    53
    Kudos:
    534
    Bookmarks:
    55
    Hits:
    3,801
  18. 19

    Tags
    Summary

    kyoka: who thought it was a good idea to do karaoke

    denki: 😇

    mina: 😇

    eijirou: 😇

    hitoshi: this is so painful

    izuku: if yall don’t stfu soon i swear to god ill come downstairs and explode every one of you

    ⋆.ೃ࿔*:𓇼⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆

    or:

    after a party at the ua dorms, the class 1a groupchat receives a very out of character message from a certain someone

    mb if the summary sucks chat im so cheeks at them

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,155
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    174
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    1,080
  19. *

    Tags
    Summary

    When Shane drunkenly confesses that he is gay to Hayden, Hayden starts forming a plan to help his friend get his happily ever after.

    Step 1: break up Shane and Lily. Step 2: get Shane a boyfriend. Step 3: get Shane gay married. Step 4: prosper.

    Should be easy enough.

    OR: Hayden is trying to figure out how to break up Shane and Lily. Ilya is trying to figure out who is sending him threatening texts about his relationship with Shane.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,571
    Chapters:
    5/7
    Comments:
    498
    Kudos:
    1,692
    Bookmarks:
    432
    Hits:
    32,249
  20. *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane swivelled around, turning his attention to the staff spread around the studio, “You really don’t see it? Oh my god, how could anyone watch this and not immediately understand what’s going on.”

    The room fell silent. Shane launched up and stood next to the editor at the controls, “Go back a few secs. Wait a second… There it is. There!” The footage paused on a wide shot of the ice, a ref had begun to skate towards Ilya, directing him back to his bench.

    “Okay go forward just like, as slow as possible.” The editor did as instructed. “Shit, sorry, it’s so quick. Go back. Okay, forward. Stop! Look, right there.”

    He heard someone from the crew murmur, “Oh my god.”

    Shane’s voice broke as he ran his hands through his hair, “Yeah. So, now do you understand why I have to do this?”

    Or: Shane makes sure the documentary finishes differently and it's the most romantic thing Ilya Rozanov has ever seen.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,332
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    349
    Kudos:
    4,316
    Bookmarks:
    626
    Hits:
    38,295

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