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“Ah.”
“‘Ah’,” Ilya repeats, giving him a look before he looks back to the tidily stacked frozen mouse packages in the freezer and makes a face as a little badly-hidden shudder moves through him. “Why the fuck do you have mice in your freezer, Shane? You are doing serial killer shit now? This is why you have cottage in the middle of nowhere? For serial killer things?”
“It’s for Spaghetti,” Shane says.
Ilya gives him an absolutely horrified look at that and turns a little green, which makes him remember that Spaghetti isn’t just his snake's name.
“Not food!” He rushes to explain. “Not food spaghetti! Snake Spaghetti!”
“What the fuck are you even saying right now,” Ilya says, looking honestly a little concerned that Shane might have something going wrong in his head.
(Distancing himself from almost twenty years of owning a snake, Shane can indeed see why this situation might be a little alarming for someone on the outside looking in.)
(It also clues him in to the fact that maybe it’s not just Spaghetti who should have gotten a little adjustment period.)
(in which i give shane allergies AND a snake)
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LOVE LOVE LOVE 🐍
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Man in Dark Glasses by InkAndAethyr
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
16 Jul 2026
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Ezra is entering middle age, alone and heartbroken. His late snake, Cornelius, died unexpectedly six months ago at the young age of four. He’s since adopted Julius, a ball python hatchling, in the hopes that he will move on now that he has something else to care for. But the ache of the young, cheery Cornelius’s passing still haunts him.
After finishing a long shift at the bookshop, Ezra stops for tea at a nearby coffee shop, in the hopes that a change in scenery and routine will snap him out of his depression. Even if just for a moment. There, he meets a mysterious young man, no older than his thirties, lounging in the corner and wearing sunglasses. He calls himself Crowley. Just Crowley.
Why is he wearing sunglasses indoors? Is the handsome young man trying to hide from something? Why does Ezra want to know him? And why does it feel like the strange man already knows a few things about Ezra?
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Altars of Ash and Silver by Aether_Nights
Fandoms: 天官赐福 - 墨香铜臭 | Tian Guan Ci Fu | Heaven Official's Blessing - Moxiang Tongxiu
07 Jun 2026
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"Oh God, Yin Yu what if he touches me?"
"Do you not want him to touch you?"
"No!" Hua Cheng almost shouted. "I'm not worthy!"
"You're the strongest Martial God aside from Jun Wu himself. If anyone is worthy it's you."
"You think so?"
"I know so."
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Aka, a rewrite of Heavens Official Blessing, where instead of jumping back down to earth after his ascension, Hua Cheng stayed in the Heavenly Capital and became the strongest Martial God after Jun Wu.(The Blood Stains the Hands of the General, just rebranded I guess)
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Read only first few chapters and!!!!!! Omggg it's too good I'm holding off for a while bcs I can't finish it just yet!!
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23
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Crowley is left down on earth, devastated and drowning his hurts in alcohol.
The demon knew that he couldn’t continue this for all of eternity; or at least for as long as it would take someone to end this planet, or him, whatever came first really. Fallen as he may be, damned as he may be, but he was his own torturer right now and he damn well knew it. Love. Friendship. He just ruins everything he touches.Back down in Hell a week after the last extermination Lucifer looked out of his windows, a little rubber duck clutched in his hand. He wondered how long it would take for Charlie to ask him to leave. They all left him at some point. It doesn't matter whether it's his love or friends. But that was his punishment, he was sure. To be alone in the end.
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In the month before the school year ended in 1942, Tom Riddle is told that the orphanage council has decided to evacuate their children due to the high risk-thanks to the war. So Tom is sent to live in the countryside with a family-thankfully(or not so thankfully)- its a muggle family with a witch daughter-(y/n), his classmate. let's see if they get along, shall we?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 38,892
- Chapters:
- 13/13
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- 1
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- 42
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- 324
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- 46
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- 6,915
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all your gardens in bloom by lookitsstevie, NaroMoreau for Okaypips
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV)
19 Sep 2023
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Aziraphale can't be happier with the life they have finally claimed for themselves in the South Downs. Everything is perfect.
Absolutely perfect.
... Is it?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,810
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 257
- Kudos:
- 1,730
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- 305
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- 19,674
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Harry isn't what the wizarding world expected him to be. Instead of a hardened warrior with wands as his weapons, he has wit hidden up his sleeves and he hides behind the comfort of pen and paper. Seeing this boy on the front line isn't likely, but he'll hide behind as many pseudonyms as possible to get his message across. Warriors can start the fire but Harry will try his damndest to put it out.
His new life in the wizarding world is faced with meddling, blatant ableism from his peers and teachers, malfunctioning hearing aids, and lots and lots of ink and parchment. Fixing the system won't be easy, but he's determined to try. If he won't try, who else will?
Harry Potter-Evans will do almost anything to make his aunt and parents proud, even if it means sacrificing his own name in the process.
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AU of PoA. Harry wakes in the night to a voice calling him from somewhere in the castle—and when he follows it, everything changes. Updated every Friday.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 613,877
- Chapters:
- 155/155
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 7,224
- Kudos:
- 24,331
- Bookmarks:
- 6,685
- Hits:
- 1,285,761
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-TBR-
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Summary
Crack prompt fills. I'm so sorry.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 110,821
- Chapters:
- 125/?
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 5,880
- Kudos:
- 2,785
- Bookmarks:
- 265
- Hits:
- 101,743
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Chpt. 18: lockdown fic
Chpt. 22: 😂😂😂
Chpt. 24: sharing same corporation
Chpt. 44: tiny pocket snek
Chpt. 57: 😂😂😂
Chpt. 58: mushrooms... 😂
Chpt. 73: pirates
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Strange Pilgrims: Being the Account of a lost Angel, the Journeys of a Demon, the meaning of Free Will, of the Unravelling of a Prophecy, and of Being Unravelled by it in Turn by sousverre
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV)
14 Jun 2023
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"Look, the whole of London's cracking up," she told him. "I'm finding it hard enough to work as it is without my commute being screwed up by the buses going on strike, and half my books turning into birds. That angel is wrecking everything, but in particular, my life - and you're too busy hating yourself to open your eyes and deal with it. I'm telling you, it has to stop."
"Is that all still happening?" Crowley said vaguely. "But I found him."
"Oh my God, you can tell you don't commute," Anathema said. "The buses went on strike, Mr. Crowley."
"That's perfectly normal for London. You'll learn."
"You're not listening! Not the drivers, the buses. They're organising - meeting in secret, holding little candlelight vigils. Nobody else really knows what's going on - everyone's just assuming it's, like, general TfL incompetence or something - but it's only a matter of time. So what are you going to do about it?"
"Er... have they submitted a list of their demands?" Crowley said helplessly.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 126,826
- Chapters:
- 17/17
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,980
- Kudos:
- 2,242
- Bookmarks:
- 791
- Hits:
- 61,012
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take me somewhere higher by cigarette_ahegao
Fandoms: Better Call Saul (TV), Breaking Bad
14 Jul 2026
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Los Pollos Hermanos has a rat problem.
Or: Gus adopts a millennial and Jesse suffers through Better Call Saul as well
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I only hear the sound of drums in my heart by avalanchesabove for woodenducks
Fandoms: Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
18 Jul 2026
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Scott and Kip honeymoon in Australia and meet some locals (of the human and animal varieties).
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,485
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 4
- Kudos:
- 22
- Bookmarks:
- 3
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- 165
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paid in blood by scrapimmortal
Fandoms: 天官赐福 - 墨香铜臭 | Tiān Guān Cì Fú - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 天官赐福 | Heaven Official's Blessing (Cartoon), 天官赐福 | Heaven Official's Blessing (Webcomic)
30 May 2025
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“Why is gege sitting like that?” San Lang asked softly.
Xie Lian blinked his eyes open. He'd been falling asleep, his body still so tired from everything it had been through in the depths of the cave.
“Hm?” How was he sitting? Xie Lian thought about it for a moment, and then he realised. Oh.
He was sitting with his back against the maple tree, his head tilted slightly backwards and to the side to expose his neck, the insides of his wrists turned upwards, resting on his thighs.
Xie Lian had trained himself to sit like that in the presence of vampires, so there was less chance of them pulling on and twisting his numb arms or hurting his neck.
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After an accident, banished fairy Xie Lian becomes the unwilling guest of a sect of vampires. When another powerful vampire destroys the sect and takes Xie Lian home to help him recover, Xie Lian is faced with the challenge of convincing his saviour that he really really wouldn't mind if he were to drink some of his blood.
Series
- Part 1 of paid in blood + extras
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 149,391
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Comments:
- 1,386
- Kudos:
- 2,571
- Bookmarks:
- 709
- Hits:
- 64,077
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- Words:
- 874,989
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 157
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Being an R2 is great. Dennis is a real doctor, with an amazing boyfriend, and the best coworkers ever who have become family. The ER is still chaotic, and the days are long, and people manage to injure themselves in more creative ways than he ever could have imagined, but he finally feels like he's got his feet under him. Until the ER gods decide to remind him that "not much surprises me anymore" is a challenge on par with using the Q word on a full moon.
Or, a venomous snake is loose in the emergency room. Of course, this is Dennis's problem.
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Malfoy is up to something (also, something is up Malfoy's ass)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,066
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Comments:
- 110
- Kudos:
- 2,334
- Bookmarks:
- 266
- Hits:
- 118,730
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Summary
A story about desire, for those who are burning inside.
sex positive - queer positive - kink positive
There's porn in every chapter, but it's above all about a love story for the ages, with a real plot.If you only want to read monogamy, volumes 1 (77W) to 4 (Snakes and Lions) constitute a complete Drarry story.
If you're open to polyamory (a throuple), the story continues and ends with Seven Virtues.
The core story is complete, but there may be more oneshots to come at some point, so subscribing to the series is still worth it!- Words:
- 761,891
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 576
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Hermione Granger wakes into a life that does not match her memories, and yet refuses to let her go. The house she finds herself in is elegant and watchful, the magic intimate and unsettling. Children cling to her with unquestioning trust, as if she has always been theirs, and their presence anchors her to a reality she does not understand.
Tom Riddle is the constant she cannot avoid: composed, formidable, and disturbingly certain of her place at his side. He does not beg or threaten. He simply waits, as though time itself is on his side.
As Hermione searches for the truth behind her fractured past, she is drawn deeper into a world built on devotion, power, and carefully guarded secrets. This a dark, suspenseful exploration of memory and belonging, where love is tangled with possession, and the most dangerous question is not what has been hidden from Hermione, but what she may have chosen to forget.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 80,518
- Chapters:
- 25/40
- Comments:
- 598
- Kudos:
- 942
- Bookmarks:
- 191
- Hits:
- 24,657
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Bookmark Notes:
Current obsession!
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so interesting!!! 24
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Chapter 23
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Summary
6,000-odd years is a long time to evolve a romantic relationship, but as a near-immortal being, Crowley had patience. True, they had lost momentum right around reaching the Speaking Looks and Meaningful Gestures stage, but at the time Crowley had been more or less content to let things idle.
Now, he was determined to shift things back into gear, and that gear was Explicitly Romantic Physical Expressions of Affection.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,223
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 518
- Kudos:
- 3,007
- Bookmarks:
- 752
- Hits:
- 29,413
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What's All This Then? Fictober 2025 by MeinirRhos
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
31 Oct 2025
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It's Fictober time, friends! Watch this space for a daily dose of prompt-inspired Ineffable fun. Ratings and warnings will appear in the chapter notes as needed, and tags will be updated as we go. You want angst? You want fluff? You want crack? You want smut??? I make no promises other than to be wildly inconsistent about what kind of stuff I write for this.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,706
- Chapters:
- 31/31
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 115
- Kudos:
- 106
- Bookmarks:
- 8
- Hits:
- 1,629