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BOWLS CUTS

Summary:

This theory explains why humans are so advanced in different parts of the world and how they advanced at all. It explains the illuminati's popularity, Trump's hair, Asia's advanced technology, and more.

Notes:

If you have a bowl cut DO NOT read because I don't want...them to know that we've become aware.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

BOWL parasites have come to earth to fill themselves for a purpose since an empty bowl is a bowl without purpose. They used to hide in wigs that were once meant to be protection from the bowls (notice how no wigs were short enough to be BOWL cuts) so that why wigs went out of fashion. A coconut hit Isaac newton on his head, not an apple, and whispered to him truths about the universe. They probably did this to feel like they have more purpose than they do. Imagine being the one to educate another species into sophistication. People started to forget about the bowl parasites and boys started getting the cuts again sealing their fate. Girls too are now getting shorter cuts. Also since so many have these cuts they'd have a group name whether they realized it or not. A group name holds together one pride and keeps people from feeling weak giving them the power to do more than they would normally do on their own. This group was called the Illuminati. It became so known but not out of a mistake. It became known as a joke so people in the Illuminati wouldn't have to speak with code words. Imagine hearing," The Illuminati are having a meeting today at six. Bring brownies." You'd think it was a joke. This is genius. Also the hoods cults wear are meant to hide their bowls cause a room full of bowl cut is so obvious if that's the only thing people have in common. You might just say that it was a uniform but to be careful no connection to the bowl could be found so they used hoods. The hoods also have points at the top to mask the circular shape of their haircuts. That's the reason the triangle is associated with the Illuminati so you wouldn't think of circles or bowls. The triangle is a diversion. Also, you may wonder why people like trump would have weird hair. These haircuts are actually the best idea. There's no wig to conceal a bowl of you ever did actually start to grow a bowl cut so people could help you before it was too late. Comb-overs means that you don't have a full head of heart so you could never grow a bowl with only one side of your hair in commission. Also, you get to keep hair without being enslaved by the bowls. Also if the bowls could put info into our heads, who's saying they can't take info out. I believe that's why people who have more power don't have BOWL cuts. So no info can be taken from their brains and so they can't be controlled. But what about Asia? So many in Asia have the cuts. Maybe the reason they're so technologically advanced was because of the bowls. If the most advanced places also have the most bowls then the bowls will feel happy that their knowledge brought people this far. They feel like they have more of a purpose and are happier. So that is why people have BOWL cuts and some other interesting info that goes along with the cuts. Stay safe and don't let anyone you care about have a bowl cut.

Notes:

Beware of the bowl!