Work Text:
1)
Isak pulled his raincoat off the hook as Eskild fiddled with his black tie. “I don’t even think the funeral will happen, Eskild. It’s pouring, look.” He waved to the window, rain splattering against the glass.
“You’re going, she was your mother.” Eskild sighed, fed up with Isak’s excuses. He had been making them for weeks.
“Not a very good one,” Isak muttered.
Eskild glared at him, “You’re going.”
“If I get the flu, you’re the one taking care of me.” Isak zipped up his jacket with a huff.
“Isak, I promise you’ll be fine. You won’t get the flu.” Eskild opened the front door to their apartment and pushed him out. “I’ll see you at dinner. Text me on your way home.”
Eskild didn’t get a text that night.
2)
The bus was just 5 miles from the memorial garden before it was in pieces.
--
Isak woke up to a baby crying, three women sobbing and two men screaming in agony.
--
He fell back asleep to smoke clouding his vision.
--
He woke up again. This time, people yelled all around him.
Lights flashed.
Sirens blared.
The smoke was thicker now.
God, he was tired.
--
He fell back asleep while sparks flew, his head unable to move.
--
The third time he woke, he was surrounded by white walls, white floors, white lights. Blue scrubs.
He still couldn’t move his neck.
“-Doctor, he’s, awake.”
Isak groaned and tried to sit up.
Strong hands pushed him back. “Sir, sir, you’ve been hurt. Please don’t move. My name is Doctor Bakkoush. Can you tell us your name?” A white light flashed into his eyes.
“Responsive to light,” someone- not Doctor Bakkoush -said.
“What happened?” Isak groaned. He was so tired. His head hurt.
“Sir, you were in an accident. A truck hit the bus you were in. Can you tell us your name?”
“Isak-” he replied. His head was pounding. Red filled his vision. His leg hurt.
“I- I can’t feel my toes.” He says quietly before glancing down. A silver pole stuck up right where his leg was supposed to be. The wound was dark and bloody, and Isak felt like he was going to puke. “What happened?” He asked again. The monitor next to him beeped faster. His head felt like it was going to explode.
“Isak, a pole went through your leg in the crash. You’ve suffered some serious burns and cuts.” The doctor explains to him.
“My leg?” He asked, panic in his voice. “I need my legs, they’re my legs!”
The doctor nods, “We understand that, Isak. We’re going to save your leg.”
Isak looked her in the eye. She had kind eyes. “You promise?”
Doctor Bakkoush hesitates. All she did was nod.
--
The pain in his head became too much and he fell asleep again.
3)
The next day was shit.
He was groggy, still, from the surgery. When he looked down, only a single leg remained under the blanket. His left leg was amputated above the knee and the other was covered with a sheet, feeling tight and itchy. His right arm was in a full cast. A cannula was stuck under his nose, puffing air in every few seconds. He was littered with stitches and bandages, and where there wasn’t a stitch or bandage, he was bruised. He could barely tell the color of his regular skin.
Isak hadn’t looked in a mirror yet. He already knew he was beat to hell. He hurt all over. His head, his ribs, his legs-
His leg.
A nurse came in midday to change his bandages.
“Is there anyone we can call for you?” She asked. Isak glared at her for a moment. Her smile didn’t falter, though. She was probably used to grumpy patients.
“Can I borrow your phone?” Isak asked, a cough ripping through his lungs.
“We have landlines for patients…” She stopped and looked at Isak up and down. “Sure. I have a few more patients to tend to. I’ll come back in twenty minutes.” The nurse pulled her phone from her pocket and handed it to Isak. “The password is 3662.”
Isak nodded and pulled up the keypad as she left the room. He stared at it for a moment before dialing.
“Hello?”
“Eskild?” Isak’s voice was hoarse.
“Who’s this?”
“Isak.” He responds softly.
--
Eskild burst through the door thirteen minutes later and promptly burst into tears when he saw Isak.
“If you’re going to be like that, I’ll yell for security.” Isak told him, but let Eskild take his left hand.
“You look horrible!” Eskild sobs, and Isak almosts laughs. “Who else did you call?”
Isak was silent.
“I can call Jonas, and your dad-”
“Not dad.”
--
Jonas arrived within in the next hour and he took the chair neighboring Eskild’s. Isak and Jonas are silent while Eskild rambles on and on, trying to keep the tears at bay. In the middle of Eskild’s story about how Linn made this disgusting milkshake, Jonas shed a single tear. Isak wished he could wipe it away, but Eskild’s grip on his hand was iron tight and Jonas wiped it away before Isak could do anything.
--
“Do you want me to call anyone else? Like Eva, or Linn-” Eskild asked again when Jonas was getting water.
“No one else. Not right now. I’m tired.” Isak looks away from Eskild and out the window. His entire body is throbbing. His stitches itch and his remaining leg felt like it could burst into flames. Again.
“Okay, that’s fine. I think visiting hours are almost over anyway. I can buy you a new phone, too. I’ll do that on my way home. I bet yours never made it through the accident-”
“Eskild, I’m tired.” This time he made eye contact with Eskild.
“Okay. Right, well-” He clears his throat and finally- finally -pulled his hand away from Isak’s. “I’ll tell Jonas you don’t want any more visitors.”
“I’d like to say goodbye to him. Please send him in when you see him.”
“I’ll do that.” Isak can tell Eskild is itching to say more. “Goodbye. I love you, kiddo.” Eskild wraps an arm around Isak’s shoulders and he groans in pain. Eskild backs away with an apologetic expression. Isak tried to smile, but it’s more of a grimace. “Love you, Eskild.”
“I’m coming by tomorrow.”
Isak nodded. Eskild leaves and Jonas walked through the door moments later. “You know, I feel kinda special.”
Isak looked up to him, “And why’s that?”
“You only wanted Eskild and me here.”
Isak rolled his eyes playfully. “Eskild is only here so he doesn’t rent out my room, and I only had him call you so he felt useful.” humor was laced in his ragged voice.
“Well, I’m still here.” Jonas responded. He sat in Eskild’s seat and took the image of Isak in again. “So…”
Isak looked down at his body again. “I didn’t even want to go to the damned funeral,” he whispered. His nose tingled and he sniffed, trying to keep the tears in. Jonas took his hand- much softer than Eskild had. His hand was rough, but the grip was loose. His thumb ran across Isak’s knuckles. He felt some of the pain fade away, like his morphine drip had been double.
Isak was taken back to when his mom died, a month ago.
And back to when he was homeless.
And back to when his dad left.
And back to when his mom was diagnosed.
And back to when he realized he was gay.
And back to when he realized he was in love with his best friend.
He wasn’t in love with him anymore- it took four years, but Isak can successfully say he isn’t. He does love Jonas though, more than his mom, or dad, or Eskild, or Eva. He would never tell any of them that, though. Except his dad, just to stick it to him.
“Thank you for calling me,” Jonas said, no humor in his voice. It was soft and deep, his eyes were looking at their hands.
“Thank you for coming.” Isak’s voice broke and he coughed, trying to cover it up,
“So, what did they say? The doctors?”
“That I’ll be fine, pending any unexpected stuff, of course.”
“And, uh, the leg?” Jonas asked.
“Which one?” Isak asked, although he already knew. He knew which leg. Jonas gave him a look. “I’m meeting with the prosthetic doctor tomorrow. The, uh… stump is still healing, but my doctor said he likes to meet people before hand, so.”
“That’s good. Prosthetics are good.” Jonas nodded with a fake smile.
“Not ideal.” Isak closed his eyes, unable to look at anything. He didn’t want to look at Jonas and the pity in his eyes. He didn’t want to stare outside at the sunset- meaning he would have to sleep soon. He couldn’t sleep. Not with the pain. “They also recommended some counselors and stuff.”
“Are you going to go?”
Isak opened his eyes and looked at Jonas in disbelief. “Are you serious?”
“What?”
“I’m-” Isak laughed, but came out more like a puff, “I’m not going to counseling.”
“What’s so crazy about that?” Jonas looked confused. “Isak, you just went through some pretty tram-”
“It’s something I can handle myself, okay?” Isak scoffed.
Jonas didn’t respond for a while. “Eskild said you were tired, so…”
Isak looked at him. “I’m sorry.”
Jonas sighed, “It’s okay. I just think it would be a good idea. Your mom died, you almost died, you lost a leg…”
Isak just shrugged. “I’ll think about it. Are you coming tomorrow?” He asked. He kept ahold of Jonas’ hand even though he could feel Jonas pulling away.
“I have to work…” Jonas sighed. “I’ll try and get the day off. I’ll text Eskild if I can’t.”
Isak just nodded.
“Try and call your dad.”
Isak was still. The chair scraped against the floor and Jonas squeezed his hand.
“I love you,” Jonas said, quiet. He coughed uncomfortably. Isak looked up at him. Isak knew he did- love him, that is. They didn’t say it often. The last time he heard Jonas say those words to him was when his dad left three years ago.
“I love you.” Isak squeezed back and his chest filled with pressure as Jonas let go.
--
Isak laid in his bed, alone in his room with the dimming light of the day. He held back his tears successfully for a full seventeen minutes until the pressure was too much. Tears flowed violently from his eyes, spilling onto his hospital gown.
--
He tried to sleep that night. He woke up every hour, almost on the hour. His morphine drip was maxed out, but the pain still ripped through his body. His arm itches, his leg burns, he can hear his lungs wheeze- a product of the smoke and tears. He lost his damn leg. His mother died. Isak would never believe that there was a worse pain than this.
--
The next day was not better.
Eskild arrived right as visiting hours started, and Isak was a cranky mess. He had snapped at Eskild three times within the hour and all he wanted was some peace and quiet.
The only thing he was happy about, was that Eskild did buy him a new phone. It was exactly like his old one, but without the massive crack in the screen and his contacts. Of course, he already programmed he and Linn’s numbers. Isak put in Jonas’ number as soon as Eskild handed it to him. Eskild also brought along a few things from home, like a blanket and Isak’s pillow.
Doctor Bakkoush and another doctor entered his room around 11, and Isak had to beg Eskild to leave. “I’m going to the cafeteria to get lunch,” he said grumpily, “Text me when they’re gone.” He left with a slam of the door, and both of the doctors jumped.
“He didn’t need to leave, we could have presented this information to you with him in the room.” Dr. Bakkoush said, setting Isak’s chart on the table on the end of his bed.
“I just need some time without him, right now.” Isak responded. Dr. Bakkoush nodded knowingly and she pulled down the blanket covering his legs- leg. It was weird to see only one leg below him. He expected it- he knew it was gone. Seeing it was a whole different thing.
Dr. Bakkoush began to strip away bandages on his burned leg. Isak gripped the bed railing, gritting his teeth. He can’t help but groan in pain. It’s burned from his ankle to mid-thigh. The skin is bright pink and raw, spotted with white areas. Dr. Bakkoush is feather light while she touches his leg, but even that made Isak wanted to scream. He’s sweating and his hand is cramping.
“Is he your boyfriend?” The other doctor asked, attempting to distract him. He’s tall, and wore a white coat and violet scrubs like Dr. Bakkoush. He stood at the end of Isak’s bed, reading over Isak’s chart.
“What? Absolutely not!” Isak answered. He knew Eskild gave off that gay vibe, but did he?
“Doctor Bech Næshiem doesn’t mean to offend you or your friend, Mr. Valtersen.” Dr. Bakkoush said quickly, glancing over at the other doctor- Dr. Bech Næsheim. She stopped touching the burn, just inspecting it.
“I- I’m not…” Isak sighed. “He isn’t my boyfriend. I could never date him.”
“Understandable. He seems very scatterbrained.” The tall doctor smiled and looked up for a moment, catching Isak’s eye. They’re very blue, Isak noted.
“He is, yes,” is all Isak said.
The three sat in silence until Dr. Bakkoush spoke up. “Your burns don’t look too bad. We do need to keep a close eye on them, though.” She took the chart from Dr. Bech Næsheim and wrote something down. “We can’t risk infection.”
“Start preventative antibiotics?” Dr. Bech Næshiem asked.
Dr. Bakkoush nodded, “And burn cream, we can get a nurse to do that.” They’re speaking quietly, just to each other.
“Sorry, I don’t mean to be rude, but who are you?” Isak asked, directed at Dr. Bech Næsheim. “I don’t remember you.”
“I apologize, we haven’t been introduced. I’m Dr. Even Bech Næsheim.” He went to shake Isak’s hand, who awkwardly bent his left arm around to shake it. “Call me Even, though. I like to be on a first name basis with my patients.” Dr. Bech Næshiem smiled. It’s a nice smile. Everyone he’s met so far, their smiles have at least an ounce of fake in them. Not his. “I’m a prosthetist- someone who makes and fits prosthetics on people in need of one. I also do physical therapy with my patients, although not all prosthetists do.”
“You can call me Isak, then.” The corner of Isak’s mouth turned up momentarily.
“Dr. Bech Næsheim likes to follow the case from the beginning. He won’t start fitting your prosthetic until your leg heals.” Dr. Bakkoush explained.
“When will that be?”
“It’ll take about four months for your residual limb to heal fully and take it’s final shape. We will fit a temporary prosthetic as it heals completely. At the end of that four months we’ll switch to your final prosthetic which will be specially fitted and provide maximum comfort and support.” Dr. Bech Næsheim answered.
“Four months?” Isak asked, eyes wide.
“If everything goes well, we can have you go home long before we fit you for that final one. The burn is really the deciding factor here. It’s not too bad, compared to other things we’ve seen. It’s still at risk for infection, which is exactly what we don’t want.”
Isak nodded. “Okay. And it’ll scar? The burn?”
“Yes, but it won’t be terrible.” Dr. Bakkoush said.
“Okay.”
“Luckily, Dr. Bakkoush is the best at treating burns. She’s performed miracles.” Dr. Bech Næsheim said while Dr. Bakkoush smiled and flushed.
“Good. That’s reassuring.” Isak nodded.
--
Dr. Bakkoush left after applying burn cream and re-bandaging his leg. Isak was sweating- the pain was nearly unbearable. Dr. Bech Næsheim remained, though. He wiped Isak’s forehead with a tissue and grabbed a glass of water for him. “Why are you still here? You’re not a nurse. You don’t need to stay.”
“Trying to get rid of me?” Dr. Bech Næshiem- Even asked, a smile playing on his lips. He sat on the bed, just were Isak’s leg should be. He tried to ignore that.
“I’m just saying. It’s not your job to get me water, or wipe my sweat.” Isak said.
“I just like to get to know my patients. Is that alright with you?” Now he’s adjusting the blanket over Isak’s stomach.
Isak just shrugged. “I guess.”
Even smiled. “Is it okay if i take a look at your residual limb?” He asked.
“I guess,” he says again.
Dr. Bech Næsheim nodded and lifted the blanket before he slowly took the compression socket and bandages away from the skin. He poked and prodded like Dr. Bakkoush did, but this felt exponentially better than his other leg. It’s still sore and uncomfortable, but better and than feeling of his raw skin being touched. “Have you seen it yet?”
Isak looked at the doctor and shook his head.
“Would you like to?”
He shook his head again. Dr. Bech Næsheim nodded. “It’s bruised and stapled, but looks good.” The doctor started to apply some cream to the incision.
“When do the staples come out?” Isak’s voice was quiet.
“At most, a week and a half. I’d like them to be off by Sunday. When we fit you.”
Isak nodded and fiddled with the edges of the blanket Eskild brought. Dr. Bech Næsheim applied the rest of the cream and bandage without another word. He laid the blanket back over the stump and discarded his gloves.
“It was nice to meet you, Isak. I’d like to come back tomorrow and take another look at it.”
Isak nodded and muttered a “nice to meet you” back before the doctor left. Isak waited a few minutes before texting Eskild he was okay to come back up.
--
The knock at the door startled Isak. He and Eskild are in the middle of a card game when the door opens. Isak expected Jonas to walk through and sit on the bed next to Isak.
In the door appeared Isak’s dad- a tall man with light brown hair. He’s balding- the receding hairline Isak had always feared. He looked like he was dressed for another funeral. He wore a black shirt and slacks- far too formal for the hospital.
The first thing Isak noticed is the pity flashing in his eyes.
The next was fear flashing in Eskild’s.
--
Isak’s father replaced Eskild in the chair. Eskild had left again, going to grab food for all of them. The card game had been packed up and put on the side table.
“Why didn’t you call?” His dad asked.
Isak stared at him for a moment. “Maybe because when mom died, you neglected to tell me for a week.”
“Son-”
“Dad.” Isak sighed. “If you’re going to do this, I want you to leave. I’m tired, and I hurt. Don’t feel like you need to stay.”
“I didn’t mean to not tell you about your mother. I just couldn’t do it.” His father sighed.
Isak was silent. He glared at his father before he shook his head and looked out the window.
“It would have broken your heart, son.”
“It broke my heart a whole lot more when I went a week without knowing. And when you left us.” Isak looked at his father now. “I was sixteen, dad! It broke my heart when you didn’t tell me about your new girlfriend, too. Do you need me to go on, dad? Because I could.”
Terje’s head hung in shame. He ran a hand through his thinning hair and sighed. “I’ve made a lot of mistakes and there’s so much I wish I could take back. I thought I was doing what’s best.”
“It hurt. It hurt to think you didn’t care.”
“I know, kid. I’m sorry.” Terje placed his hand on Isak’s hand, but Isak pulled away. “I’m gonna come every day, you know. To visit you.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep. You’ve left me before.”
“I promise I’ll stay with you.”
Isak sighed and nodded. “Fine.”
--
His father stopped coming four days later. Isak wished he could say he didn’t see it coming.
4)
What Isak had learned over the past week and a half was this:
1)Eskild was full of stories from his university days.
2)Burns hurt.
3)His nurse- Emma -was very cheerful. Probably too cheerful for someone who works with dying people.
4)His doctor- Even Bech Næsheim -was extremely attractive.
Even had light blue eyes that nearly suffocated Isak. They were as blue as the scrubs nurses wore- but brighter. Isak had a theory that if he stared at them long enough, he could fall asleep with ease. In his brief moments of sleep, he could see them in his dreams. They could follow wherever he went, but not in a creepy way. They were loving, doting eyes.
“I think we’re on track to take out the staples tomorrow- how’s that sound?” Even asked as he slips off the compression socket.
“I think that’s great.” Isak replied.
“Good, after that we can start fitting you for your prosthetic. How’s Monday morning sound? We can fit you, do some physical therapy, get you used to the prosthetic and discharge you that night.”
“Are you serious?” Isak sat up, eyes wide in disbelief. It felt like he had spent years in that bed, not 12 days. He couldn’t wait to get farther than the bathroom- and without assistance, no less.
Even nodded, “Completely. Sana- Dr. Bakkoush said that your burn was doing great, your arm is fine, and after we get these staples out we can send you home. You’d need to come back for physical therapy, your final fitting, get that cast off, but right now you’re good.”
Isak smiled, “God, that would be great.”
Even smiled back. His eyes sparkled and Isak could feel himself melt.
“Would you like to see it?” Even asked. He always asked this. Each day, when Even came in to assess the incision, he would ask if Isak would want to see it. Each day he denied.
Isak nodded.
Even looked at him for a moment and pulled up the blanket a little farther, exposing the residual limb. It ended mid-thigh and the bottom was flushed red. Isak bent over farther to see the incision site. It was bruised from the staples, but looked clean and healed. Isak felt a little light headed. “Wow.”
“It’s insane, isn’t it?” Even asked.
“Yeah… wow.” Isak look a deep breath. “It all just hit me.” Even was silent. “It’s something I’ve had for twenty-four years and it’s… gone.”
“Not for long. You’ll have a new leg soon.” Even told him. His voice was soft.
“But it won’t be my leg. It’ll take time to get used to it. That’s not something I would need to do with my old leg.”
“You know, the aluminum technology has come a long way.” Even said.
For some reason that made Isak laugh. “Is that right?”
“Yeah! You’re lucky we don’t send you off with a peg leg.” Even laughed as he grabbed new bandages.
“In that case, you should have taken my arm, too. I could have had a hook.”
“It’s not too late,” Even said as he threw a wink at Isak.
Isak’s face heat up. “I don’t think I’d want another surgery.”
“No, probably not.”
“It made me feel all icky and gross. I didn’t like it.” Even just smiled as he wrapped up the residual limb again. “Are you an amputee?” he asked.
“Me? No, I’m not. My ex-girlfriend was, though. Right leg, below the knee. We dated for a while when I was getting my degree…” Even’s voice faded off and Isak came to the sudden realization that of course he wasn’t gay! This was how he knew he needed time away from Eskild; not everyone was gay. “But yeah, it was quite the journey.”
“Hmm, I bet.” Isak replied as Even finished sliding the compression socket on him. Even pat Isak’s leg twice before he stood up, disposed of his gloves and picked up Isak’s chart.
“So, tomorrow, we’ll take those staples out. I think Dr. Bakkoush thinks you’re ready to get out of bed, too. We can get you in a chair and take a stroll down to PT, sound good?” Even spoke as he wrote something down.
“Yeah, I’m excited.” Isak nodded.
“Great, rest up and I’ll see you bright and early tomorrow. I’ll take you to my favorite breakfast stand in the courtyard.” Even winked again and waved goodbye as he walked out.
--
“So, today’s the day, huh?” Eskild asked as he ran a comb through Isak’s hair. He was sitting next to Isak on the small bed, huddled close to him.
“Not really. Tomorrow is.” Isak’s eyes were closed as Eskild played with his hair. On any other day, he would shoo Eskild away. Today, he was too content to do anything.
“No, I mean your date with Dr. Hottie.” Isak’s eyes flew open and he stared at Eskild.
“Excuse me?”
“Oh- was it not a date? I thought you were telling me… Gosh, I’m sorry.” Eskild thought for a moment. “Are you sure?”
“That it’s not a date? Of course it isn’t! He just said after I get the staples out, we can grab some breakfast…” Isak drifted off, thinking about it.
“It sounds like a date to me.”
“He's straight, though.” Isak told Eskild.
“You just have bad gaydar, Isak.” Eskild continued to comb through Isak’s hair.
“What? No, I’m the master of gaydar, shut up.” Isak huffed, crossing his arms. A knock on the door broke the moment of silence and Dr. Bakkoush and Dr.- Even walked through. Even was wheeling a wheelchair in, a bright smile on his face.
“Good morning, boys!” Even said. “Are you excited?”
Isak nodded, “Very. I can’t wait to see something other than these bland walls.”
“Control yourself, Even. I have to do one last check, then you guys can do whatever you want.” Sana walked over to Isak and proceed to pull down the blanket and unrapped his bandages. Each day got less painful. Today, it was only a few spots that hadn’t healed as fast as the others. Eskild hopped down from the bed to sit in a chair, letting Dr. Bakkoush do her thing.
“So, I’m gonna take you down to PT and get the boring, hard stuff over with. Then we can go eat some real, not-hospital food.” Even came over and put a hand on Isak’s shoulder. If Isak didn’t know any better, he would say Even, his doctor, was more excited than him.
“Sounds like a plan,” Isak replied.
--
Standing between the parallel bars, Isak had never felt more helpless. He stood there, holding onto the bars for dear life. He didn’t know it would be this hard. Even in front of him, holding onto the gait belt and his waist
“I’ve got you, it’s alright. I just want to test your balance and strength.”
Isak nodded sharply. “It’s- weird. To do this.”
“Mhmm, I know. Can you do a small squat for me?” Even asked, watching his leg. Isak lowered himself, barely what you could call a squat. “Yes, that’s good.” He looked up at Isak. “That’s great. One more time?” Isak repeated the motion, a little lower than before. “Even better, that’s amazing.”
“Can I sit now?” Isak asked. His hand hurt from gripping the bar so hard.
“Yes, you can.” Even helped Isak sit back down into the wheelchair. As Even fixed the footplates and took off the gait belt, he praised Isak. “That was really good, I only expected to get as far as standing today.”
Isak only hummed a response. He was tired and out of breath, even just by standing for a minute.
“I want to work on getting this leg nice and strong. It’ll help with balance and help you get from place to place. Even when I’m not around, try to just bend your knee, gain your mobility back. Can you do that for me?”
Isak nodded. “I can do that.”
Even smiled and stood up. “Great.” He pushed Isak back so he could escape the bars and get behind the chair. He began to wheel Isak out of the PT room. “I was kind of surprised how tall you were, you know.”
Isak turned and looked up at Even. “Doesn’t it say how tall I am in my chart?”
“Well, yeah, but I was still surprised. I don’t get many patients that are almost as tall as me.”
Isak turned back around to face forward. “I guess not.” Isak thought a moment, “Will my prosthetic make me shorter?”
“If all goes well, you’ll be the same height. Don’t worry.”
“Good. I wouldn’t want to make you look any taller.” Isak replied, a smile on his lips.
Even laughed, a hearty sound. Isak wished he could bottle it up and keep it. “We wouldn’t want that at all, would we?”
“Absolutely not.”
--
They stopped by a small shop in the courtyard. “What do you want?” Even asked, standing next to Isak.
Isak searched the pockets of his robe. The only thing he found was an old wrapper from the cafeteria food. “Shit, I forgot my wallet. Sorry. I won’t have-”
“I’m paying. It’s fine.” Even replied nonchalantly, not looking down at Isak.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, don’t worry. It’s just breakfast.” Even looked over and shrugged. “Take your pick. The muffins are great here.”
--
“So what’s your biggest regret?” Even asked after the sat down at a table. Even bought the two of them coffee, muffins and a doughnut for Isak, although he denied. Even said something about “needing the energy,” and “building muscles,” and Isak shut up.
Isak choked on his coffee, nearly spilling it all over himself. “Excuse me?”
Even shrugged, “Your biggest regret. What is it?”
“Isn’t that a little too personal?”
“I said I like to get to know my patients, didn’t I?”
Isak was silent. He stared at Even for a moment, thinking. “One time I broke up my best friend and his girlfriend because I was jealous.”
Even raised an eyebrow. “No shit. She must have been hot.”
Isak flushed. “He was.”
It was Even’s turn to fall silent. “No shit,” he asked quietly.
“You know that guy that’s come to visit me? Jonas? Dark hair-”
“Massive eyebrows?” Even asked in disbelief. “I would have thought you had better taste, dude.”
“It’s gotten better, I think.” Isak took a bite of his muffin.
“And he’s still your friend… Damn. Did you guys ever get together?” Even paused. “Are you together?”
Isak shook his head. “We never got together. He’s straight. He never knew I liked him- I didn’t tell him, at least. And he told me it was for the best, their relationship was shitty anyway.”
“Maybe you should check again. If he was still your friend after you fucked that shit up…” Even raised his eyebrows and took a sit of coffee.
“I’m over him anyway. I think I just liked him because he was the closest guy friend I had, you know? I was just discovering my sexuality and I kinda felt like I needed something to secure it, or whatever. I mean, I still loved him, I guess. It just didn’t start out as a normal crush, if that makes sense.” Isak explained, picking at his muffin.
“No, I totally get that. I had this friend, Mikael, and we got super close when I was figuring everything out. I guess I read too much into it, because when I kissed him, he ran away and didn’t talk to me for a year.” Even laughed solemnly.
“Fuck, that sucks. I’m sorry.” Isak consoled him as he internally freaked out. Even?? Kissing a boy?? Still doesn’t mean this is a date, the back of his brain told him.
Even shrugged. “It was really a bunch of stuff leading up to that. I was acting kinda weird and when I kissed him, it was the last straw, I guess. I lost a lot of my friends, fell into a depression and then I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I reconnected with them a while after that and explained everything.”
“That’s good, right?”
Even nodded. “I’m still friends with them now. Dr. Bakkoush- Sana, is actually related to one of my friends. She’s Elias’ sister. And engaged to Yousef, another friend of mine.”
Isak smiled. “That’s really nice. I’m glad it all worked out.”
“I’m glad it worked out for you, too.”
--
Knowing Eskild, he should have suspected that this would happen.
Eskild drove Isak home, along with all the stuff he brought for Isak as well as what the doctors had given Isak. Isak walked with a forearm crutch, just until he was strong enough and comfortable in the prosthetic. Eskild carried everything up to their apartment while Isak tried to stay on his feet. It took a while but they made it up the stairs.
Isak opened the door to a mix of all his friends. They surrounded him as he walked in, all surveying the “new Isak”. Isak could only go along with it, answer everyone’s questions, “yeah, I’m fine,” and everyone wanting to touch his stump.
Isak sat on his couch, tired as all could be, next to Linn who looked equally as exhausted.
“I told Eskild to not throw this party.”
Isak looked over to her. “Thanks, Linn.”
--
Only an hour into the party, Isak couldn’t take it anymore. He was tired of explaining himself, tired of the pity looks. He just needed to sleep for a day.
Isak grabbed his crutch and fit it around his arm before standing up. It took a second for him to adjust to standing, but he found his footing and began to walk towards his room. He felt a hand take his own before pulling away. Vilde stood next to him.
“Hi, it looks like you could use some help.”
“I’m fine, Vilde. I don’t need help.” He began walking again.
“It’s fine if you think you don’t need it. It’s okay to ask for help.”
“Vilde. Stop. I can walk. At least far enough to my bedroom, okay? Please stop helping me.”
“Isak-” She started.
“Vilde, listen to me. Unless I’m unconscious on the floor or on fire, promise me you won’t help me in any way.”
“Okay, Isak. I promise.” Vilde looked down at her shoes.
--
Eva Kviig Mohn
00.04
Please apologize to Vilde
??
What?
She’s upset by what you said and wants
an apology
(seen)
+1)
His time home was exactly how he guessed it would be. Eskild hovered over him, even if he was lying in bed, and when Eskild wasn’t home, he made Eva or Vilde stay in the apartment. Eskild made a point of only letting him leave alone if he was going to physical therapy. If he went anywhere else, he had to have someone accompany him. Isak felt like a prisoner in his own home.
--
Isak met Even at the door to his physical therapy room. Even smiled and opened the door for him.
This was their third physical therapy appointment since Isak had been discharged, and Isak learned that physical therapy wore him out. Since the day he got his staples removed, each appointment had gotten easier. Even still pushed and pushed, leaving him weak and tired by the end of the hour. He felt good, though, knowing each session helped his body.
“How’re you?” Even asked as Isak sat down.
“Better, I think. Eskild still won’t leave me alone, but I guess that’s okay.”
Even smiled, “It’s good he cares. He’s not babying you, though? Doing everything for you?” Even sat on a stool and began to take off Isak’s prosthetic.
“Nah, I yelled at him about that. Told him that I need to be independent- doctors orders. He still helps with the burns, but that’s it.” Isak laughed.
“Oh, blame it all on me.” Even rolled his eyes. “Nice move.”
Isak just smiled.
--
The session ended an hour later. Isak was slipping his prosthetic back on as Even wrote things down in Isak’s chart.
“You did really good today. Keep doing your home exercises- you can ask Eskild to help with those. I’m going to give you some gel for the bruising. If the pain is too much next time, I can prescribe some painkillers. How’s that sound?”
Isak nodded, “Yeah, that’s good.”
They were both silent for a moment. Isak was still fiddling with his prosthetic- it was an art that took time to master.
“So, I was wondering if you’d like to go on another date?” Even asked, calmly. He was still looking at Isak’s chart.
“What?” Isak’s heart was racing. Another date? Did he not remember the last one? He knew something had happened to his head in the accident. He’d have to call Dr. Bakkoush.
“Oh, sorry. It was just the last one went well, I thought-” Even set down the clipboard.
“Last one?” Isak asked.
“In the courtyard- breakfast?” Even explained.
“Fuck- that was a date?” Isak asked. “I didn’t know, I…” Isak drifted off, trying to wrap his mind around this.
“Well, I thought it was a date.”
Isak sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Even, his hot doctor Even, took him on a date and he didn’t even realize. Isak began to laugh, “Eskild even told me it was a date before you came and got me…”
“You should listen to Eskild more often.”
“I didn’t even know you were gay!” Isak looked up and Even was smiling. His eyes squinted at the corners and his cheeks filled out. Isak wanted to watch that forever.
“I’m not gay, but I am pansexual.” Even corrected him. Isak shook his head as he laughed harder.
“I’ll go on another date if you promise me something.”
“And what’s that?” Even slouched against the counter.
“Don’t tell Eskild. He told me you were gay- or liked boys, at least. I told him you didn’t. I can’t have him knowing he was right. Not right now.” Isak explained.
Even’s laugh sounded like songbirds on a summer’s day. His head tilted back and he grabbed his stomach, like what Isak just said was the funniest thing he’s ever heard.
“I promise.”