Chapter Text
Chapter 6 -En route to Mandalore (The Mandalore Plot)
When Rex next awoke he had no concept of time or space. Only that his head had somehow grown in size by an order of three and he was thankful for the darkness.
Letting out a very undignified groan that he only allowed because he knew he was alone, he flung a hand out to find his com, fumbling with his eyes closed and head pressed into the thin regulation mattress until he found the function that would make it announce the time out loud.
Then he groaned again. He only had fifteen minutes before he was expected in General Kenobi’s quarters.
He contemplated briefly the idea of stopping by the Mess for a cup of caf on the way, but the nausea he hadn’t noticed reared up and called attention to itself at that idea.
Instead, Rex groaned audibly for a third time and rolled out of his bunk and to his knees. He paused, breathing deep through his nose until the room stopped spinning, even with his eyes closed, and he felt confident about climbing to his feet.
Rex had never been prone to migraines, but he knew plenty of vode who were, a side effect of repeated head trauma that wasn’t unexpected considering the lives they lead.
But, once he’d stumbled through his Fresher routine and wrestled himself into fresh blacks, he’d vowed never to disparage a vod who begged off duty due to this particularly heinous brand of headache. His head wasn’t so much throbbing now as it was threatening to implode and melt off his shoulders. His legs were not much steadier by the time he was kitted up and he put on his bucket and set the visor to night mode, steeling himself with a deep breath before he decided to brave the fully lit corridor.
By the time he arrived at Kenobi’s quarters, three decks and half a ship away, Rex was getting flop sweats under his shell and was immensely thankful he hadn't eaten because the smell of vom-in-bucket never really went away no matter how many times you cleaned it.
He chimed the door once and was trying to decide what the odds were Kenobi could have whatever conversation he felt was needed with Rex in a fetal position on the floor, when it opened.
“Captain, do come in, you’re right on time.”
Rex moved stiffly to follow the Jedi into his room. Obi Wan immediately went to the tiny alcove in the wall that housed a makeshift kitchenette, leaving Rex floundering awkwardly in the middle of the room. Relying on training and an old cadet trick to keep himself on his feet when they felt like they were made of jelly more than bone. He let his mind drift, reciting prime numbers in his head and staring at the bulkhead. He let his other senses fuzz out for a moment, just a moment, he thought, he’d indulge in this, and then he’d pay the General the attention he deserved.
He jumped when he felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see the General giving him a concerned frown.
“Are you alright Captain?”
“Sir.” Rex said, and he knew his vocoder would cover the strain in his voice.
Apparently, Kenobi knew it too.
“Then, would you mind terribly removing your helmet?” He asked, with a small smile, “I made us tea.”
Rex hesitated and then, with a steadying breath, reached up and broke the seals on his helmet, pulling it off to prop against his hip.
He was powerless to control his wince and he squinted his eyes shut against the light.
“Oh, Rex,” Kenobi sounded genuinely troubled. “If it’s at all possible, I do believe you look worse than you did yesterday.”
“Thank you sir.” Rex said, not a little bit of sardonic dryness in his voice.
A moment later he relaxed marginally when the lights went out. He felt pressure on his shoulder again and opened his eyes.
“I may be able to help, if you don’t mind?” The Jedi asked quietly.
Rex had no idea what the General was going to do or how. He agreed immediately.
A second later Rex felt a cool ocean breeze blow through his mind, taking the majority of the pain with it and tension that had balled up in his shoulders and neck unfurled with a bone deep sigh.
“General, don’t take this the wrong way, but I would very much like to kiss you right now.”
Obi Wan laughed lightly, giving Rex’s shoulder a quick squeeze.
“Come sit, Rex.” Obi wan gestured to a tiny two-seater table in the corner with a low light lamp on the wall above it.
“Really General, what did you do?” Rex sat and picked up the tea the general made. It smelled green and bright, and was the color of a Rodian sunset.
“Am doing, actually. I’m shielding your mind.”
Rex jerked slightly, spilling a bit of tea over onto his gloves. “Sir?”
“I told you yesterday,Rex, you’re suffering from a rather severe case of Force Exhaustion. I imagine it has something to do with whatever you did to Kix yesterday. Especially if that was the first time you’ve ever intentionally used the Force,” he inclined his head in question, blowing on his own tea.
The barest of nods was all Rex could muster. Kenobi hummed and sipped.
“I thought as much. You should drink that.” He nodded toward Rex’s cup, “My master used to make it for me when I overdid it in training. Settles the stomach.”
Rex did, and was gratified to find that his stomach did in fact settle some as the liquid pooled there. It did nothing, however, for his mind.
"What do you mean you're shielding me, sir? My shields-"
"Are in tatters I'm afraid." Obi wan said and Rex fought very hard against the panic that welled up inside him at the thought. Kenobi got up to retrieve the sugar and continued, "I'm not certain, but what I've gathered from the men is the training you receive in thought shielding on Kamino is the most rudimentary, blunt force sort of shielding. It's reminiscent of a wall or in your case, reinforced durasteel and permacrete." He was teasing, Rex knew, trying to put him at ease. It wasn’t working, and now neither was the tea. "The problem with that is, in order for anything to pass through, the walls have to come down."
Kenobi sat back down, smiling kindly and passing the Captain the sugar cubes. Rex didn’t take any. Not because he didn't want them. He couldn't remember how to move his arms.
Obi Wan set them down between them and continued.
"My suggestion would be, when we rebuild them, this time you should add some doors."
Rex swallowed, searching for his voice. He set down his mug. "So the pain this morning was from..."
"The empathic feedback of every mind on this ship."
Rex slumped back in his chair.
"Kriff." As soon as he said it his eyes widened and Kenobi hid a smile in his tea.
"Indeed."
Rex stared down at his cup. His legs felt boneless and he couldn’t get over the feeling that the deck-plating was about to splinter beneath him and he'd be dropped into the engine cooling vats.
"Sir, I-"
"Obi Wan, please Rex. Or Kenobi if it makes you more comfortable. I think it would be best if we attempted to phase out the use of titles for now."
Rex took another deep breath through chest constructing panic and swallowed.
"Kenobi then." The Jedi tilted his head in acceptance. "What about...I know you said I have nothing to fear, but," its hard to believe that, he didn’t say. Kenobi nodded gravely, as if he heard it anyway.
"I meant it Rex. And I have in fact already had a conversation with Master Ti this morning about this. She will be investigating the Kaminoan's practices of," he wrinkled his nose in distaste, "vetting the men's development. We will not stand for any inhumane practices, I mean that. As a General and a member of the Jedi Council."
Rex blinked and nodded. He still wished there was a way to open a window. Maybe he could ask Kenobi if they could turn down the temperature in the room. Sweat was beading at his hairline and under his armor plates.
"It might help if I could tell her what exactly we were looking for."
Rex looked up, realized the Jedi was looking for him to give him some direction. He blinked.
"Its not...really my place to say, sir." He said finally, clearing his throat when his voice cracked, dry and strained. "I don’t, um. That is...what is considered "appropriate" quality control? For nat- borns, I mean?"
Obi Wan froze, then with deliberate, slow movements, set his cup on the table.
Obi Wan tried very hard not to think of the men as products, actively discouraged the idea among them and other Jedi. Sometimes being hit over the head with the concept in the blunt, almost naive way the troopers spoke of it, he forgot that they didn’t know anything else. They spent their entire lives among their brothers, and those that treated them as a whole rather than individual sentients. Sometimes he forgot that, for as much as the men knew about the ins and outs of war, they conversely knew next to nothing about...everything else.
"Why don’t you just tell me what it is you were worried would happen to you? When someone found out?"
Rex licked his lips.
"Decommissioning."
The look Kenobi sent him seemed to suck all the air from the room. He closed his eyes and Rex tilted his head at the sensation of heat like the first step off the ship on a desert planet, followed immediately by another cool breeze.
"Well," he said, low and hoarse, "thats certainly a place to start."
Rex arrived back at his room and heaved a deep sigh. He felt ready to pass out again and he'd only been awake for a few hours.
Kenobi had received an unexpected call from the council and apologetically dismissed Rex from their meeting earlier than anticipated.
They'd managed to rebuild most of Rex's shields before that at least, with doors this time, though Rex couldn't help but feel a bit awed and panicked at the idea of more ready access to the Force than he was used to. Though Kenobi had also advised him against attempting to access the Force for at least another day.
Rex didn’t think he had much choice in the matter, the place in his mind that had always had a pleasant fullness before still felt empty and numb. He found himself shying away from the feeling.
He stripped his top shell and dropped onto the bunk, unsure what to do about the fact that he was finally hungry, but also too tired to move.
His head snapped up at the sound of his door opening.
"Kix." He noted the medic looked as surprised to see Rex as he was to see Kix, which was ridiculous. It was his room.
"Captain." He hesitated, "can I come in?"
"You already opened the door, Kix. Might as well." He noted he'd brought a tray of food. Ration cubes, rehydrated vegetable mash and a pudding cup, looked like. He was almost motivated to move. Almost.
Kix set the tray down on his desk and turned to hand him the pudding and a spork.
"Here. I got Mixer to save a couple of your favorite."
Rex's lips twitched as he took the proffered snack. "How'd you know butterscotch is my favorite?"
Kix rolled his eyes and settled in Rex's desk chair, sideways so he could prop one arm on the back and rub his palm roughly over his head.
"Im a medic. I make it my business to know what foods you lot will be motivated to eat if you're not well."
Rex shifted his weight, some of the achyness of that morning bleeding back into the spaces between bone and blood.
"And why are you mother henning me today, Kix?"
Kix tilted his head.
"Because Force Exhaustion is a bitch." He leaned back to crossed his arms over his chest. "And I figured if the Jetti need to eat more during one of these burnouts, so do you."
Rex was frozen, mouth full of pudding, with no escape. He swallowed.
"Kix.."
“You should have told me.”
Rex sighed, dropping his eyes to the pudding cup and stirring it idly. “There was nothing to tell. I’ve…never done anything like that before.”
“You. Should. Have told me.” Kix repeated, deliberate weight in every word. Rex knew the wind up to a lecture when he heard one, and he’d earned his jaig eyes honorably. He met Kix’s gaze. “I don’t mean because you’re my friend and I know carrying the weight of this around on your own was probably damn near maddening. Or because as your friend you should have trusted me not to put you in a position that could be dangerous.
I mean because I’m your medic. And when I get pulled out of unconsciousness after being healed from a deadly injury it’s important that I know what’s happening before you pass out on the floor of some barn on a random planet in the middle of nowhere.”
Kix held his gaze a moment longer before he sighed, the ire draining out of his eyes that Rex knew was just as much a part of his armor as his shell.
“And because you’re my friend. And I can’t imagine what it’s been like for you to keep a secret like this all this time.”
The quiet, genuine affection in Kix’s voice was so unexpected Rex had to concentrate not to reach for him in the Force, almost desperate to feel the warmth of Brotherhood that he’d come to depend on without even realizing it.
“Thank you, Kix.”
The medic’s mouth quirked. “You saved my life."
Rex shook his head. "It was my fault you got hurt in the first place."
"Still. Thank you." His face softened and he chuckled to himself. "You should have seen Jesse's face when he saw me. I thought he was going to pass out the blood drained out of his face so fast."
Rex groaned. "Jesse. And Hardcase. I have to figure out something to tell them."
Kix flapped his hand dismissively. “Don't worry about it, I took care of it."
Rex raised an eyebrow in question.
“I told them to leave the diagnosing to me.”
Rex nodded. It wasn’t a lie. And it would do for now.
“I’ll tell them. I just...Kenobi thinks now that I’ve started using the Force, it might be hard not to and I just...i need some time to work through all this before everyone starts...looking at me and seeing something else.”
Kix nodded and didn’t press on that particular bruise.
“Who else knows?” He asked after a moment, allowing Rex to finish his pudding and start giving the rest if his food thoughtful look. He was relaxed again, leaned back against the wall with one ankle propped up on the opposite knee. Rex wondered how it was so many of his brothers struggled to sit still, to be serious, if they weren’t on the battlefield. For Kix it always seemed like his natural state.
Even Rex felt like a cadet sometimes, compared to Kix.
“Keeli. Cody,” He swallowed, “General Kenobi.”
Kix startled, “What? Do any of the other Jedi know?”
Rex shook his head. “I asked the General to keep it to himself for now. He says the Jedi didn’t know about…” he sighed, knew Kix would hear what he didnt say, “any of it. He says they’ll put a stop to it.”
Kix swallowed, giving Rex a long, shadowed look. “Lets hope he does.”
After General Kenobi departed in his Aethersprite for Mandalore, the 501st and 212th departed for the Illenium system to provide support and relief to the 612th.
The fourteen hour hyperspace jump had been filled with self-indulgent levels of self-isolation for the Captain, complete with ‘rest’ that had been ordered by both the medic and the Jedi, and copious amounts of paperwork that they had not.
But he was a Captain, he had things to do.
By the time they got planetside he was almost back to feeling like himself.
*CC-2224 has opened a private communications channel including CT-7567.*
Rex's eyes flicked up to the notification in the corner of his HUD and stifled a sigh. There could be any number of reasons Cody would want to hold a conversation no one else would hear, but he somehow didnt think this one would have anything to do with the mission at hand.
"You feeling better?"
Rex glanced toward his brother without turning his head. He was making rounds through the newly set up camp, directing the AT-TEs and supply unloads from their cruisers in orbit. Cody had already finished overseeing the setup of camp and a briefing with Commander Ganch and come to find his heretofore missing younger brother.
"What did you hear?" Rex asked. He caught the gaze of a knot of troopers rough housing while unloading crates from the ship and they all snapped to attention, shoulders coming up to the seals on their buckets. He rolled his eyes, glad his fond smile didn’t show under his helmet. He gave a dismissive wave and they all returned to what they’d been doing, with a bit more focus this time.
Cody waited until they were moving toward the next ship to speak again.
"I know you were injured on Salucami. I know you weren't in the medbay and Kix was threatening to verbally, and then physically dismember anyone who disturbed you in your room.” They paused, as a shiny came running up from the 212th’s side of camp, saluting crisply. He handed Cody a pad. He gave a quick glance through the document and signed it, handing it back before turning back to Rex. “And I know the only ones to see you since then have been him and General Kenobi."
"Rex?" Anakin waved to them from a group of speeders parked nearby.
Rex switched his vocoder to broadcast externally.
"Yes sir?"
“I’m gonna go scout the ridge with Jesse and Denal. We’ll brief with Ghost, Torrent and 612th command when we get back.”
"Aye sir."
Cody and Rex weren’t able to resume their discussion until they'd finished cataloging supplies and assigned guard rotations. By then there wasn’t much time left until Skywalker would be returning from his scout mission, so the two made their way to the command tent to wait before gathering the rest of the men.
"So what happened?" Cody said, picking up their conversation from an hour before. Battlefield habit had Rex catching on seamlessly.
Rex winced.
"I deflected a Commando sniper shot on accident. Hit Kix's speeder and exploded, threw us both. When I came to I found Kix was..." Rex trailed off and shivered at the echos of panic and foreshadows of death that had hung thick in the air in the barn that day.
Cody shifted so that their shoulders bumped together, Rex tapped his bracer in thanks.
"He wasnt going to make it. I...I had a vision."
Cody let out a long breath. "What did you do?"
"I asked the Force to help me save him."
"I guess it must have said 'yes'. He seemed pretty alive last time I spoke to him."
"Yeah."
They nodded at a few of the men making their way into the tent, clustering in groups of twos and threes as they all waited for the General to return.
"What was that like?" Cody asked after they'd watched the men talk quietly for a few minutes.
Rex sighed.
"Like...I've spent my whole life looking away from the sea and thinking the water that washed between my feet was the whole ocean, and now I've turned around and... there’s a lot of ocean." He realized he'd trailed off in wonder and found Cody staring at him an 'aren't you adorable' tilt to his bucket.
He gave his brother a shove. "Nejohaa."
Cody chuckled, rolling with the shove and bobbing back up to knock into Rex’s side. "I didn't say anything, vod. So General Kenobi knows?"
"Yeah."
Cody barely paused.
"Good. I'm happy for you."
Rex shook his head, wondering at the way his chest felt lighter with his older brother's blessing.
In that moment the General entered the tent, a grim look on his face, Jesse and Denal in tow. Rex and Cody stood to meet him at the holoprojector at the center of the temporary room.
“Alright men, here’s what we’re going to do.”