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When they find Steve, he’s doesn’t look sick or hurt. Sarah has never been so glad to see her little boy. At six, he’s not in the best health on a good day, but having been lost in the forest for nearly a week, she was terrified of what they would find. She never let the thought that he wouldn’t come home cross her mind, but she’s sure that all of the people looking for him did. Steve runs into her arms, but after he’s hugged her, he looks back at the trees.
“Can Teddy come home with us?” Sarah looks at the trees, following his gaze, but sees nothing.
“Who’s Teddy, sweetheart?” Steve wiggles out of her arms, looking into the trees again.
“He kept me safe and warm.” The EMT’s show up and take Steve to the hospital where he’s checked over and numerous tests are run. They bring in a counselor for kids that suffer from traumatic experiences, but Steve grins and tells him that he feels good. The counselor tells Sarah that when he starts to show signs of trauma, she should get him help.
Steve never does.
It’s only been a few months, but Steve looks out of his window into the streets of Brooklyn and seems to be looking for something. Sarah, finally, sits him down to find out what happened. She’d had a bad feeling about sending him out with the Carter kids on a camping trip and her mother’s instinct was right when they left him behind to get lost in the woods.
“Steven?” Steve leaves the window and comes to sit on the bed with his mother. “Tell me what happened when you got lost.” The counselors that she spoke to told her to let Steve come to her, that if she pushed, he would shut down. It’s been too long and Sarah needs to know what happened, so she finally asks.
He looks down at the floor, scuffing his toe across the carpet. He doesn’t want to get anyone in trouble, or himself, but she needs to know. “They were playing hide and seek. I couldn’t find them and wandered off to look.”
Sarah pulls him into a hug and lets herself think of the worst possible outcome. “What happened then?” Michael Carter had assured Sarah that Steve would be fine with his daughters, but when they came to pick Steven up, Sarah could see that the girls weren’t excited about having Steve along on the trip. She’d almost changed her mind, but Steve had been so enthusiastic that she just couldn’t.
“It was getting dark and I was getting scared.” Steve starts to sniffle and Sarah pulls him into her lap, rubbing his back, so he doesn’t have an asthma attack. Wiping his eyes on the back of his hand, Steve looks up and smiles. “Then Teddy found me and I was safe.”
“Who is Teddy, Steven?” She has visions of some man taking her son, but he doesn’t act like anything bad happened.
“He’s a bear, Mama. He’s big and brown and furry. He took me to a cave and kept me warm all night. The next day, he took me to the water and I got to drink right out of the stream!” He’s so excited and Sarah can’t help but smile at that, but what he’s saying doesn’t make sense. In her mind, if there was a bear, it would have attacked. Then Steve keeps talking. “I found some berries to eat, but Teddy wouldn’t let me have them. I don’t know why, they were red and looked good, but when I tried to eat them, he knocked them out of my hand. He took me to another bush and we ate those instead.”
Sarah doesn’t know what to say, but if Steve made up a friend to keep him from being scared, then she’s going to let him have that. “I’m glad you made a friend and someone was there to take care of you.”
“Yeah! And we played chase in the trees and Teddy let me win and find him every time.” She’s convinced that this is Steve’s imagination. If it is, there will come a time that Steve remembers what really happened and at that point Sarah will have to get him help. She’s convinced that little Stevie will eventually need therapy for the real trauma that happened.
They don’t talk about Teddy very often, but when they do, Steve is just as sure about all the details. He even tells Sarah that he can take her to the cave, but she doesn’t ever want Steve in the woods again. The years go by and Steve grows out of his ailments and into a striking young man with admirers. Even the Carter girls want his attention, but he never goes around with either of them. Sarah asked him about it once and Steve tells her that Teddy didn’t like them. To Steve, caring about someone enough to open yourself emotionally is built on trust. Steve trusts Teddy, even all these years later, so he doesn’t trust the Carter girls.
“How do you know Teddy didn’t like them?” Steve’s in his late teens now and seems embarrassed about it.
“When I told Teddy why I was lost, he growled when I said Peggy and Sharon.” Sarah can’t help herself and laughs because Sarah’s not a big fan of the girls either. In her heart, she knows it’s wrong, but she blames those two for Steve’s disappearance. And the only reason they like Steve now is because of how he looks.
Steve goes to NYU and lives with his mother. His friends tell him that he’s missing out by living at home, but it never feels that way. A few years after graduating, Sarah admits to Steve that she’s sick and has been for a while. She didn’t tell him before because she was afraid he would abandon his studies to take care of her. Steve blames himself for not noticing, but Sarah tells him, “I’m not your burden to carry, Steven. I chose to keep you in the dark about this because as your mother, you have to live your life and not mine.”
She fights for years, but it finally takes her and Steve is lost. Everyone tries to draw him out, but he can’t feel anything. His whole body has gone numb. It isn’t until Steve has a visit from Peggy and Sharon, both trying to comfort him, but also vying for his attention, that an idea comes to the young man. He doesn’t want what either of them are offering. He needs to be away from here until he’s ready to accept what’s happened.
The only times he’s felt safe and loved in his life are with his mother and with Teddy, so he loads up a backpack and heads to the woods. Leaving the house locked up securely, he knows that the neighbors will keep an eye on everything until he gets back. It’s been over two decades since he came to these woods, but he feels like he remembers every step he took to get to Teddy. If he didn’t know any better, he’d swear that there’s something pulling him in the right direction.
He finds the cave first, but when he goes in, nothing is inside except the nest of leaves and other underbrush that he remembers sleeping on with Teddy. He searches the whole day, but doesn’t find his friend. It’s been a long time, but he knows, as sure as he knows that it wasn’t a hallucination, that somewhere, in these woods, is the bear that loved him enough to take care of him for four days.
Steve is so small against him, but he has to protect this boy. Bucky doesn’t know why. It isn’t that he doesn’t have higher brain functions in this form, but he’s been shifted for so long that some of them have given way to instincts. The only thing that is certain is that Steve is important. When the little boy first sees him, his lips start to quiver and his eyes get wet. Bucky doesn’t want to instill fear in the boy, so he rolls over onto his back, waving his paws in the air.
It does the trick and the little blond boy starts to giggle. Rolling over, Bucky crawls to him, lowering his head and waits. This little boy glows in the evening light and something about it isn’t just from the natural light, something about it is supernatural. He’s glowing from inside too.
He steps closer and puts a hand on Bucky’s head. “You’re just a big teddy bear.” Internally, Bucky sighs and rolls his eyes. He has to give the boy that because he is very young.
There was a time when Bucky could judge how old the boy is, but it’s been so long and that knowledge is gone. The little boys sits down next to him and Bucky turns on his side to wrap around the boy and keep him warm. “They left me. I thought they were friends, but when I couldn’t find them, they just left.”
Bucky looks up and around, hoping that he’s not going to have to give the boy up until tomorrow. He doesn’t hear anything from the surrounding trees, so whoever these ‘friends’ are, they really did just leave him. Getting up, he herds the little boy towards his cave and into the nest that he keeps there. A few bears have tried to take his den, but Bucky fights them off each time. “What’s this place?”
It would be easy to turn back into his human form and tell the little boy, but it’s safer if he just acts out this boy’s idea of a big teddy bear. They curl up in the nest together and the blonde boy sleeps peacefully until morning. Bucky herds him to the stream the next morning and allows the boy to drink his fill, and then he disappears behind a tree and does his morning business. “Mama says that I have to be careful cause I’m allergic to a lot of stuff.”
Bucky waits patiently as the boy does what he needs, then takes him to the berry bushes. The first time, he tries to eat the poison berries, Bucky has to knock those from his hand and guide him to the safe ones. They play chase in the trees and eat more nuts and berries for lunch. By evening, the boy is wearing out and Bucky herds him back to the cave. As the boy starts to fall into sleep, he mumbles. “My name’s Steve. I’m glad you found me, Teddy.”
By the time Bucky hears the people in the forest, he takes Steve as close to where they are without being seen. Nudging the boy, trying to tell him to go back to his kind, Steve turns, hugging Bucky. “I’m gonna to miss you.” If he could cry, Bucky would, but it’s the right thing to do. As Steve walks away, into the trees, Bucky sees that same glow. If he didn’t know any better, he’d think that Steve was his, but Steve’s human. Shifters and humans can’t share those kinds of bonds.
Bucky isn’t expecting to hear anyone in his part of the forest. The last time someone wandered in, it was...Steve. God, he misses that little boy and that special glow. Bucky has no idea how much time has passed because being what he is and in his bear shift, time doesn’t mean very much. Whoever is here, stays near the stream, but he can smell that they’ve been close to his cave. Going in, he sniffs around and finds that they even came in. There’s something familiar about what he’s smelling, but it can’t be.
Going out, into the woods, Bucky follows the scent and it takes him to the water. What he sees makes him stop in his tracks. There’s a man, big, strong, broad shoulders and blonde hair, bent over, drinking. He makes a huffing noise and the man looks up. Bucky’s never seen a man that looks like this. His eyes show a depth of sadness that is clearly the same as a lost little boy all those years ago. And he’s glowing. As the blonde stands, he seems to be tearing up. “Teddy?”
Without thinking too hard about it, or at all, Bucky shifts. “Steve?”
The man jumps back, yelping and falling into the water. Bucky barks with laughter, but starts over to help. The man, so, so beautiful, backs away in the water. “What are you? How do you know me?”
Bucky smiles because it’s him, he knows that it’s Steve. The same glow comes off him and Bucky knows now what it means. Normal or not, Steve is his. “Because a little boy got lost in these woods a long time ago and met a bear, even named the bear Teddy.” Bucky looks up at the setting sun. “My name’s actually Bucky.”
Steve stands in the water, shoes and clothes soaked. “Am I going crazy?”
“No.” Bucky laughs again and looks over Steve’s body. “You’ve grown.”
“You’ve definitely changed.” Steve scratches his head, trying hard not to look at the naked man in front of him, but finding it to be difficult. Whoever this man is, he’s muscled and tan skin. His hair, long, down his back, is waves and waves of auburn sheen, not unlike the color of the bear's fur. But his face is a thing of beauty, unlike anything Steve’s ever seen before. “You were just...a...a bear and now you’re a man. I don’t...” Steve’s arms are waving around, up and down Bucky’s form, and up to the sky. He’s nearly panicking and Bucky needs to get him to calm down, so he quickly changes the subject. Steve will have to come to grips with this, but maybe a change of scenery will help.
“We can stand here and talk or we can go back to the cave where it’s comfortable, build a fire and get your clothes dried out and talk there.” Steve shouldn’t trust this, but there’s something in the man’s eyes that he knows. He has no idea how he knows this man because he’s sure if he’d seen this guy on the street or in a restaurant, he’d remember someone so breathtaking. So, he follows.
Within minutes, Bucky has a fire going at the mouth of the cave and Steve lays his clothes on the rocks nearby to dry. He feels strange wearing nothing but boxer briefs, but he doesn’t have anything else and it isn’t like Bucky is looking at him. “Explain to me how I’m supposed to believe that I’m not crazy?”
Bucky sits down, still naked, but without any self-consciousness about it and tries not to look at Steve’s body, but he can’t help the little side glances. Steve grew up very well. The blonde sits on the ground close to the fire. Bucky sighs. “I’m a shifter. I can look like this or I can be a bear. I know you probably don’t believe me, but there are shifters all over the world. Some are deer, some are bears, some are horses. I even had a friend once that could become a cat.” Bucky looks off into the distance. “I wonder what happened to her?” He turns back and sees Steve watching him. All manner of emotions are flitting across his face, but none of the changes are disgust.
“You said your name is Bucky?” He gets a nod and Steve continues. “So, you’re talking about stuff like magic.”
Bucky bobs his head and doesn’t look at Steve. “Yeah, I suppose that’s the best way to describe it, but I was born this way. My family still lives in Brooklyn, I think. I haven’t seen them in a long time.”
“How did you know it was me?” Then Steve processes what Bucky just said. “Your family lives in Brooklyn?”
Turning enough to look into Steve’s eyes, Bucky sees curiosity, but that sadness is still there. “Why do you look like you’re grieving?”
“Answer my questions first.” Bucky chuckles, Steve is still stubborn, just like when he was little.
“Okay, I knew it was you from the scent you left in my cave,” He hesitates to say the rest, but figures he might as well, since he may never see this man again, “and from your eyes. I never forgot those eyes.” Steve nods for him to continue. “And yes, my family lives or lived in Brooklyn. I can’t be sure they are still there. Now my question.”
Steve looks like he’s going to challenge Bucky and not answer, but then his shoulders slump and he looks defeated. “My Mom died a few months back and this is the only other place I ever felt accepted and loved.”
Bucky leans in, bumping shoulders with Steve. “Then you stay as long as you want. I’m sorry about your Mom, she really seemed to love you a lot.”
There’s silence and Bucky doesn’t push for more conversation. When the sun is down completely and Steve looks like he’s dozing off, Bucky pulls him into the cave, puts him in the nest and shifts back to his bear. Curling up around Steve, he feels the little boy, that just lost his mother, relax into the warmth of Bucky’s deep brown fur. They wake and Steve is curled into Bucky like he’s trying to be that little boy again, the one that walked out of the forest and into his mother’s arms. Losing someone, it’s always hard, but losing the one person that made you safe, that’s worse.
Bucky knows about loss. He’s here, in this forest because of his loss. His family wanted him to marry a girl, a girl from a prominent shifter family, but Bucky refused, saying he could never love her. When he finally confessed that he wasn’t attracted to girls, his father had turned his back and because George had power in the family, everyone else disowned Bucky too. It had hurt, still does on certain days, but Bucky did what was best for him and that has to count for something.
Steve wakes slowly, rubbing his face in Bucky’s fur. The big, brown bear wraps a paw around Steve and pulls him closer. Instead of waking with fear, Steve cuddles closer and hums into the warmth. Bucky could get used to this, but has to remind himself that Steve came to him hurting and Bucky can’t take advantage of Steve’s vulnerability.
It’s been weeks and Steve doesn’t seem to want to leave. During the day, they walk the forest, fish, hunt berries and talk. Bucky tells his new friend why he came to these woods and Steve freezes in his tracks. “Bucky! How could they do that to you?” Coming from the life he had, Steve can’t understand family turning someone out because they’re gay. Sarah knew about Steve since he’d turned 12 and she told him to live his life and find his happiness. That’s what family is supposed to do.
“In the shifter community, Steve, we don’t have choices like humans do. We have to do what the family asks because we have limited options for partners.” Steve stops him in their walk by grabbing Bucky’s hand.
“You didn’t.” Bucky looks down at their hands. Steve stares down and starts to pull his hand away, but Bucky doesn’t let him.
“No, I didn’t. I saw what these arranged marriages could be up close and I didn’t want that for myself.” He finally looks up into Steve’s eyes and sees...something, but he has to remind himself that Steve came here for acceptance and warmth.
“What do you mean?” Steve starts walking again, but doesn’t release Bucky’s hand. It’s...nice.
“My grandparents, they learned to love each other even though the marriage was arranged, but my parents, not so much.” Steve squeezes his hand and Bucky continues. Bucky doesn’t mention true mates because they’re so rare, but when he looks at Steve, he knows. “My dad was always about duty to the family. My mom wanted to love him, but beyond continuing the family line, he didn’t really care about her.” They get to a lake and Steve is awed by the beauty of this place. “She started drinking when I was about 7 and it got bad. My dad called her an embarrassment to the family and sent her to her parents.”
“Wait, he didn’t try to help her?” None of this sounds like a pleasant way to grow up and Steve feels, deeply, that Bucky deserved better.
“No, she wasn’t his problem.” Steve nearly yells out his anger and frustration over that. “Remember, Steve, shifters don’t do things like humans. Our lives are so long, so we have to keep that in mind.” Steve closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. Pulling the blonde to the lake, Bucky sits in the grass and Steve joins him. Bucky is very aware that they haven’t let go of each other. “Anyway, a few months later she came back, sober, but she wasn’t the same. I asked my grandmother what had happened and she told me that my mom had come to grips with the state of her life. I didn’t know what that meant at the time, but as the years went on, I realized that it meant she’d cut herself off from her own emotions.”
There’s silence for a long time and when Steve finally speaks, it’s quiet and reserved. “I’m sorry, that’s no way for anyone to live.”
“I couldn’t become that, so when I told them no on the marriage, leaving was the only option I had.” Steve leans over, putting his head on Bucky’s shoulder.
“I’m glad you did because little me wouldn’t have been found and protected.” Bucky slips his arm around Steve’s back and holds him.
At night, Bucky shifts and keeps Steve warm in the comfort of his nest. Part of Bucky, that he won’t examine too closely, thinks of it as their nest. He watches the blonde man sleep and wonders what it would be like to have this all the time. He watches the blonde sleep and desires to have this all the time. Shifters form connections quicker than most and the bond he’s formed with Steve is profound.
They’re fishing when Steve says it. “I’m going to have to go home soon. I was given time away from work after Mama died, but I have to go back.”
Bucky doesn’t look over because he doesn’t think he can face this. In the time that Steve’s been here, with him, accepting all the unknowns of Bucky’s life, the shifter has fallen in love with a man more exquisite than anything Bucky’s ever seen. Steve’s not perfect, far from it, but he still glows and Bucky knows what that means. “I understand.”
There’s no talking, then Steve blurts out. “You could come with me.”
Bucky’s head jerks up. “Why?”
“Because...well...because...” Steve rubs the back of his neck and won’t look at Bucky, then blurts out, “Iloveyou.” Bucky’s face breaks into a smile and Steve looks like one of those berries he tried to eat as a boy. “I know it’s not what you want because I’m not a shifter and I get it if you want me to leave now, but I connected to you when I was little, I never forgot you, and being with you here, now, it’s...it’s not that I’m lonely, I really do love you.” Bucky’s smile grows as Steve babbles on.
“I love you too.” Stepping into Steve’s space, Bucky doesn’t kiss him, he does cradle the man’s face in his palms. “I connected to you all those years ago and never forgot you either. I missed you and then you came back to me, only now, after spending this time with you, I know what this is.”
Steve’s flushed and breathing heavy from the contact. “What is this?”
Bucky gives him a soft smile, leaning up to kiss Steve’s forehead. “We formed a bond, somehow. It isn’t supposed to be possible, at least that’s what I was told as a kid. You’re mine Steve and I’m yours. We are meant to be.” Steve’s eyes look inquisitive, sparkling in the light. “Shifters form bonds, deeper than what a human can understand, but somehow, we’ve done that.”
Steve goes back down the mountain and finds a general store with clothing. He buys what he thinks will fit Bucky and heads back up. Bucky laughs and tells Steve that he’ll make most of the trip in his bear form, changing when they get closer to people. Once in the car, Bucky reaches over, taking Steve’s hand. The blonde cuts his eyes over, smiling.
“It’s been a really long time. I’m kinda nervous.” Steve pulls their joined hands up, kissing Bucky’s knuckles.
“You’ll have me. I’ll protect you this time.” Bucky blushes and watches as they drive back into the city. When he told Steve that it had been a long time, he didn’t give specifics, so everything he sees is new. Even Steve’s car had been confusing because they didn’t look like that when he came to the mountains. But, he knows Brooklyn when he sees it. Many, as in almost everything, has changed, but he knows his original den when he sees it.
“Why are we in Brooklyn?” Steve looks over confused and squeezes Bucky’s hand.
“I live in Brooklyn, Bucky.” They pull up outside a very nice brownstone. “This is home.”
Getting out of the car, Bucky looks up and knows that this place is expensive. In his day it would have been expensive. “I thought you said your Ma was a nurse.” It’s said off-handed, but Steve comes around the car laughing.
“She was, but my dad, I told you he died in the army, he took out three life insurance policies. Ma bought this place after he died and I was just a baby.” They head up the steps and when Steve lets Bucky inside, the bear shifter gasps.
“This place is beautiful, Steve.” There’s so much natural light and from the wall of windows off the back, Bucky can see a yard and trees. “If I wait until the middle of the night, I could even shift out there.”
Steve pulls him further down the hall and into the kitchen. Bucky looks around in wonder because this is not, at all, like the kitchens he’s used to. “I’m going to fix us some food and then we can shower and talk more.”
Once full and warm, Bucky goes back downstairs to find Steve sitting at his desk, doing something on a small, rectangular ‘box.’ “What are you doing?”
“Oh, I’m sending an email to my boss and letting her know that I’ll be in on Monday.” Looking up, Steve sees Bucky in pajama pants and one of his t-shirts. He gives a soft smile. “You don’t mind, do you?”
Bucky shakes his head and realizes just how much he doesn’t know about this world that Steve grew up in. “I think I’m out of place here.” Steve stands and starts over to Bucky, but a raised hand stops him. “Steve, I have no idea what an email is, I don’t know what that box is that you were working on, I don’t know what half the stuff in your kitchen does, and it took me forever to figure out the shower.” He gives a sigh and convinces himself that he’ll be too out of place in Steve’s life.
Arms slip around his waist while he looking at the floor. When he looks up, Steve’s face has reached a level of devotion that Bucky isn’t prepared to see. “I don’t care. Anything you don’t understand, I’ll show you how to do. Anything that is confusing, I’ll explain it to you. I want you here, with me, unless you change your mind and then I might just follow you back to the woods and live there with you.”
“I want to be here with you. I just think, I mean, I never really told you when I left here and went to the forest.” Steve shakes his head and waits for Bucky to be ready to tell him. “Steve, I was born in 1917. I went to the forest in 1948.”
The blonde looks stunned, but doesn’t let go of Bucky. After a few seconds of silence, Steve hugs him even closer and whispers, “I didn’t know I had an age kink.”
Bucky pulls away, just enough to see Steve’s face and snorts. “Well, so my age isn’t an issue.”
For the next four days, Steve shows Bucky everything in the house and how it works, including the computer and how to do searches. They get out on the third day and Steve buys Bucky a cell phone and spends the afternoon showing him how to use it. On the fourth day, Steve takes him out and gets him clothes that fit. “How does that feel?”
Bucky is wearing jeans and a sweater. His hair cascades down his back and Steve stands behind him, running his fingers through it. “You have an obsession with my age and my hair.”
“I have an obsession with all of you.” Leaning in, he kisses Bucky’s neck. “Now, do you like this?”
Bucky nods. “It’s strange that everyone wears jeans now. That wasn’t how it was in my day.”
Steve buries his face in Bucky’s hair and chuckles. “For the first time, you just said something to show your age.” Turning and leaning up, Bucky kisses Steve lightly. “You don’t feel old though.”
Bucky gives him a wink and a smirk. “I like the jeans. They’re soft and the sweater is warm, like my fur.” Steve buys the clothes and Bucky wears them home. They order in for dinner and eat by the fire on the floor. With dinner finished, Steve goes to put everything away and when he comes back there’s a bear on the rug in front of the fire.
Without saying a word, Steve strips off his clothes, leaving his boxers in place and goes to cuddle with his teddy bear. He can see his life as strange, but this feels natural. Bucky, being in his home, even as a bear, feels natural. “I love you.” The paw around his waist, pulls him closer, cuddling in the warmth.
Steve returns to work and immediately adds a picture of Bucky to his desk. His boss comes to check on him and her eyes linger on the new photo. “How are you, Steve?”
He looks up and sees that she’s making sure he’s okay to be here. “I’m better. I know it took time and I really appreciate you letting me have it.”
She nods and perches on the edge of his desk. “I didn’t know my parents, so I can’t say that I understand how you feel, but you’re a good man and that tells me that Sarah Rogers was a good woman. If you need anything, I’m here.”
She starts to get up and walk away. “Thanks, Natasha.”
She stops a few feet away. “Who’s the guy?”
Steve blushes and looks at the picture of Bucky and melts a little at the warm smile on the other man’s face. “That’s my boyfriend.”
“Huh, that’s new. Congratulations.” Steve nods and immediately gets back to work. At the end of the day, Clint comes to his office, poking his head in.
“Hey, we’re all going to dinner tonight. You should come.” Steve looks up, Clint’s head is in the doorway, but his body is around the frame and he seems to be trying to wave someone off. “And we’re bringing our significant others, so you should call your boyfriend and have him meet us.” Clint looks out the door making a face at whoever is out there.
“Okay? What’s going on, Clint?” Stepping into the office, Clint shuts the door.
“Natasha wants to meet this guy of yours and doesn’t know how to do that without this ruse of dinner. Just get it over with because she’s going to keep pulling stuff like this until she gets what she wants.” Clint throws himself into the chair in front of Steve’s desk. “She’s pushy, but it comes from a good place.” Clint’s looking down at his hand and fingering the tattoo that decorates his hand. Steve’s always been curious, but never worked up the courage to ask, since tattoos can be really personal.
“Got it. Okay, I’ll call Bucky and see if he’s up for it, but I’ll need to go and pick him up.” Clint looks curious. “He’s new to the city and doesn’t know his way around.” Clint nods and gets up. “Text me where we’re going and we’ll meet you there.”
As soon as the door is shut again, Steve picks up his phone. Bucky picks up, sounding out of breath. “Hi, Honey, what’s up?”
“Buck, you okay?” There’s a chuckle on the other end.
“Yeah, I was running up and down the stairs.” Steve sits back in his chair, even more confused.
“Uh...why?” There’s another chuckle and Steve can’t help the smile that blooms across his face.
“As a bear, Steve. I was running around the house as my bear.” It’s Steve’s turn to chuckle and try to picture Teddy Bear running up and down the stairs. “I started feeling anxious and needed an outlet and it’s not like I can go running around the streets of Brooklyn as a big, brown bear.”
Sitting up, Steve’s worried now. “Bucky, what’s making you anxious?”
There’s sigh and Steve can picture Bucky trying to figure out a way to say what he needs without hurting Steve. “Steve, you gotta understand, shifters aren’t like humans. When we find our...mate, we want to complete the bond with them and since we haven’t, when you left today, my shifter got really scared.”
Leaning on the desk, Steve rubs his forehead. “Why didn’t you tell me? We can do anything that needs to be done. Just tell me what it is.”
“I need to get a few things, but we could do it any time.” Steve remembers dinner and huffs. “What’s the matter, Steve?”
“My boss wants to take us to dinner tonight. We could do it when I come pick you up or after we get home.” There’s a low sound and Steve realizes that it’s a deep growl coming from Bucky. “Or I can cancel.”
“No, don’t cancel, but we’ll need more time than when you come to pick me up, so we’ll wait until we get home.”
By the time Steve gets home, Bucky is ready and locking up the door. He hasn’t asked about this bonding because he trusts Bucky completely. Bucky comes down the steps looking like a million dollars in his black slacks and black turtleneck. His hair is pulled loose at the base of his neck, tied off with a black piece of leather and Steve’s never been in love like this before. He’s had crushes, but nothing compares to what he feels for this shifter. If he were to admit to his overly romantic side, he’d call Bucky his true love, his soulmate, but Steve also knows that people hear those words and usually give indulgent, condescending smiles. So, he keeps that to himself.
He gets out of the car to come around and open the door for Bucky when a voice down the sidewalk invades their little bubble. “Well, Steven Rogers, you finally came home. Did you have enough of the woods?” The voice isn’t kind, even though Steve is sure that Peggy thinks he can’t hear the malicious tease in her voice.
Leaning in, Steve kisses Bucky’s cheek and whispers, “Peggy.” The deep growl that Steve heard as a child, when he told Teddy Bear about the Carter girls, vibrates out into the open air. Steve turns, putting on his fake smile. “Peggy, how are you?”
She comes over, leaning into him and Bucky pulls Steve into his side, placing an arm around his waist. “I’m well, darling. Who is this, Steven?” Before Steve can answer, she’s talking again. “You should come around and spend some time with me. I know how you miss my company.”
Steve closes his eyes and Bucky tightens his arm around the blonde’s waist. “We have better things to do than come and feed whatever this delusion is that you have about Steve.”
She seems genuinely taken aback by Bucky’s words. “And just who are you?”
“I’m his boyfriend and you’re one of the girls that left him in the woods as a kid. I can’t imagine why Steve has been trying to put you off all these years.” That frustrates her, but Steve feels a swell of affection for a man, who would do anything to protect a little boy and now the man he’s turned into.
“Steve understands that it was just a joke, don’t you darling.” Steve steps away from her when she tries to get in his space. “And Steve isn’t gay, so I don’t know who you really are.”
Steve holds up his hand. “Actually, Peggy, I am gay and have been all my life. You just chose not to listen to me when I told you because I turned into someone that you’d actually want to be seen with.” He helps Bucky back into the car, then turns back to face her. “And no, I didn’t take it as a joke when I was a kid and have never really liked you or Sharon, so please stay away from me.”
He jogs around the car and gets in, leans over, kissing Bucky, and pulling away from the curb. Bucky turns in his seat. “She’s still standing there in shell shock.”
“Good, serves her right.” Bucky looks back over. “Thank you.”
“For what?” They get to a red light and Steve cups Bucky’s cheek.
“For everything. Taking care of me as a boy and for loving me now.” Bucky takes Steve’s hand, kissing the palm. Steve’s convinced again that this is what true love feels like.
As soon as they walk into the restaurant, Bucky tenses. Steve leans in, only whispering the words, so he doesn’t draw attention to the sudden change. “Buck?”
“There’s another shifter here.” There’s a flurry of activity to their right and Steve looks over to find Natasha coming towards them. When Bucky turns to fend off any challenge that might happen when two shifters, not of the same den, meet, his shoulders suddenly relax. “Natasha?”
She grins bigger than Steve’s ever seen her. Throwing herself into Bucky’s arms, he holds her close and sniffs her hair. “My god you look amazing!”
Steve’s instantly feels that he’s in the way and starts to back towards the door. Everything in him is crying out that Bucky was wrong and they aren’t bond-mates. He feels Bucky’s hand, slipping into his own and pulling him back. “I should probably go and let you two...” The familiar way that are with each other indicates to Steve that something deeper is between Bucky and Natasha.
Turning, Bucky sees the devastation in Steve’s eyes and realizes what the man must think. Reaching up, he takes Steve’s chin in his hand, caressing the light stubble. “You remember when I told you I had a friend that could change into a cat?” Steve nods and then puts two and two together.
He looks over at his boss, whose eyes are wide in fear. “James, you shouldn’t...”
Bucky turns, grinning. “Steve knows, Natasha. He loves me and he knows.” She sighs in relief.
“Well, then, let’s get back to the table, so we can all talk.” It ends up that by ‘everyone’ Clint only meant him and Natasha. After ordering drinks, she turns to Steve. “Since you know about James and now about me, then you should know that Clint is my bond-mate.”
Bucky lights up at that and reaches across to pat her arm. “All those years you swore that you didn’t have one and would never have one were just you going through your angsty teenage years.”
She reaches over, smacking Bucky in the head. “When did you two bond?”
Both men blush, telling Natasha and Clint that they haven’t yet. Clint chuckles and looks over at Steve. “Man, are you in for a wild night.”
“Since you disappeared after the whole arranged marriage thing, I’m assuming your family won’t be in attendance?” Bucky shakes his head and Steve squeezes his hand. “Things have changed, James.” Bucky looks over, but he knows his father and nothing about that man will ever change. “Most of the clans have accepted that the old belief about only being able to bond to others like us, was wrong. Most of the clans have humans as part of them now. And because of that, true-matings are more common.”
“What about Bucky’s family?” Steve can’t help but ask because there may be someone that Bucky wants at their bonding.
“I don’t know. I kept up with them until about 1951, but after that I had to reinvent myself.” She explains to Steve that they can only live so long under one name. People start to notice that they don’t age and at that point, they have to move on. New York is big enough that they don’t have to leave the city, just relocate within the boroughs. “I did spend some time in Europe in the early 1980’s.”
Clint winks over at Steve. “That’s where I met her and I’ll never forget how she looked at me that first day.”
Bucky leans into Steve’s side. “She told you that you glowed?” Clint nods. “I’m sure you thought it was a pick-up line.”
Clint takes a drink and shakes his head at the same time. “Man, a woman that looks like Nat comes onto me, I’m not letting that get away.”
Everyone laughs at that and Steve looks over at Bucky. “Have I always glowed to you?”
Bucky turns in the booth, running his fingers through the hair at the base of Steve’s neck. “When you were a boy, I thought it was just the sun or something, but when you came back to the woods, I realized what it really was.”
Clint waves his hands. “Wait, when were you in the woods as a boy?” Steve relays the story and how he met Bucky.
Nat starts to laugh. “Wait a minute! You told me that your best friend as a boy was Teddy. Were you...did you call...” She’s laughing so hard she can’t get the words out and Clint looks over confused. Steve blushes and Bucky smirks.
“Yes, Natasha, little Steve named me Teddy Bear.”
Steve excuses himself to go to the bathroom and Clint heads to the bar to get more drinks. “When are you bonding?”
Bucky watches Steve walk away and sees the people watch him move through the restaurant. He’s been in bear form long enough to know that his instincts are still out of control, so when the growl comes out of him, Natasha laughs quietly. She smacks his arm and he turns to her. “Oh...uh...tonight when we get home.”
“Does he know what’s going to happen to him when you bond?” Bucky shakes his head and looks down at the table, knowing what’s coming. “James...Bucky, you have to tell him before you go through with this.” She gets a nod and leaves it alone. “Clint and I are coming home with you.” Bucky’s head jerks up. “You know you need a witness to what happens in the ceremony.” Bucky does know that a normal bonding has witnesses, but with his family situation the way it is and Steve’s mother having passed, he just figured that it would be okay. Natasha watches him come to terms that theirs will have people that can attest to the validity of the bonding and he nods, squeezing her hand in thanks.
The ride home in the car is quiet for a time. Steve doesn’t know why Nat and Clint are coming over, but something about the way Bucky told him made it seem important. “If you’re having second thoughts, it’s okay.”
Bucky’s head snaps over to look at Steve. “Stevie, Baby, I’m not having second thoughts. I just didn’t tell you everything.” Steve bobs his head and Bucky sees resignation. “Sweetheart, you understand that we don’t age the same, right?”
Steve glances over, then back at the road. “Bucky, I know I’m going to grow old and die before you even look any older. I don’t care. I want to be with you for as long as we have.”
There’s a chuckle from Bucky. “That’s just it, Steve, you won’t age the same either, not after tonight.”
“I don’t understand.”
“It’s simple, when we open the bond during the ceremony, then complete it later, you’ll be marked as a shifter’s mate. You’ll start aging the way that I do. While you were in the bathroom, Natasha explained how the bonding works between a shifter and a human.” Reaching over, he puts a hand over Steve’s on the steering wheel. “Steve, this isn’t like a marriage, it’s completely different and I want you to be sure before we do this.”
There’s isn’t even a small hesitation. “I’m sure.”
Natasha and Clint move the furniture out of the way while Steve and Bucky go to get changed in separate rooms. Steve didn’t understand those instructions and still doesn’t. He slips his clothes off and under strict instructions from Clint, removes everything and only puts on a robe. Once he’s back downstairs, Bucky is already there, also in a robe and the floor in front of the fire place looks like Bucky’s nest in the cave, only this time, it’s blankets and pillows. Everything on the floor is new and Steve remembers Bucky saying he needed to get a few things. This must be what he meant.
Natasha smiles at the two and goes to Steve. “When James left, the family searched for years, but he’s good at not being found. It wasn’t that shifters didn’t take humans as their bonded, but when they did, back then, they were shunned.” Steve looks concerned at why she’s telling him this. “Those that were bonded to humans were no longer welcome in the shifter clans. But, over time, we found out what they had been told all their lives was a lie. Shifters can bond just as solidly with a human as they can with another shifter. Now, it’s not an act that can get anyone thrown out, but there are still those that believe it’s wrong.” She smiles over at Clint. “I never cared what anyone thought and I know that James doesn’t either. Just promise me you’ll love him for all the days you have.”
“I promise.” Steve looks over at his Teddy Bear and can’t imagine not having him.
“Good, now, bonding ceremonies are required to have witnesses. As soon as the ceremony is done, Clint and I will leave.” She pats Steve’s chest and smirks over at Bucky. “Trust me, we don’t want to be here for what happens after.”
Clint comes over, hugging Steve and quietly telling him what the human side is like. “It’s going to be the best night of your life and you’ll never doubt how you feel about each other.”
Bucky comes over and takes Steve’s hand, drawing him to the nest. “Steve, what we’re going to share is more than any human, unless bonded to a shifter, can understand. Everything we are is going to be shared from tonight forward. I know you’ve wondered why I’ve held off on being with you physically and it’s simple, I want our first time together to be when our bond is set.”
“What do I need to do?” Steve looks into Bucky’s eyes and sees no doubt, no hesitation, and only devotion. There’s something soft about Bucky’s gaze, something new that hasn’t been there before.
“You just have to tell me what you want and I’ll do the same.” Reaching into the pocket of his robe, Bucky pulls out the other things he got earlier in the afternoon. “I got this for you to give to me, but you won’t need a ring. If you want one though, we can go out in a couple of days and get you one too.”
Steve furrows his forehead and looks over at Clint. He’s the other human in the room. Clint winks at him and lifts his left hand, showing Steve his tattoo. As long as Steve’s known him, Clint’s had the strange thing on his hand. Each of Clint’s fingers and the back of his hand have a strange round-ish designs. It’s only now that Steve looks at it that he realizes what it is. On the back of Clint’s left hand are the imprints of the pads of a cat’s foot. “Oh.” He looks back at Bucky and then down at the ring. Taking it, he reaches up, caressing Bucky’s cheek.
“Tell me what you want.” Steve understands now and rests his forehead against Bucky’s.
“I want home. When you found me in the woods, I was safe and deep down, in the place that a young child doesn’t understand, I knew that I was home with you. I want forever with you. I never wanted to leave you that day in the woods. Even as a kid, I knew that I wanted to be there, in your nest, with you. I just didn’t understand what it was that clawed at me to stay. I want everything. Having found you again, I don’t want to ever be without that. I want to wake up every day and see your beautiful face. I want to love every part of you and let you love every part of me.” He feels, more than he sees, Bucky’s breath hitch. Bucky holds out his hand, Steve slips the ring on.
No one says anything, then Bucky takes Steve’s left hand and the room starts to spin for Steve. “Here we go.” Clint’s voice sounds like it’s coming from miles away, like an old radio program.
Bucky leans away and Steve nods. “Steve, I want you to be beside me every day. When you walked out of my forest all those years ago, I knew it was the right thing to do for you, but as I watched my glowing, tiny angel walk away, I didn’t think I’d see you again. I want to love you with the intensity of the bond we’re opening. After so many years alone, I didn’t think I would have this and then you came back to me. I want you to know that my love is a by-product of the devotion and admiration I have for you. I’ve never met anyone stronger and more generous than you are. Bringing me here, into your home and allowing me to be who I am. I want everything with you and only you. Your acceptance of who I am, what I am, it’s a freeing experience and you allow me to be me. I want to love every part of you with every part of me.”
Natasha draws Clint towards the door, but the two men standing in front of the fire don’t see them or hear them. The glowing that Bucky has always associated with Steve engulfs them both and when Steve looks down at his left hand, deep, brown marks start to appear. On each finger an elongated design raises through the skin. “Claws.”
Bucky leans in, kissing Steve’s hand. “My claws.” The golden light fades and Steve’s suddenly weakened by a feeling welling up inside of him, feelings that aren’t his own, but live inside him.
It’s intense and overwhelming, but also, somehow, calming. “I can feel you.”
Bucky helps to keep him upright and watches as the wave of light washes over Steve. “Are you ready for me?” Before Bucky can get the words out, Steve is ripping the robe from Bucky’s shoulders. Some shifters call it the fever, some call it ‘going into heat.’ It overtakes Steve first, but Bucky is seconds behind him and pulls Steve’s robe from his body, pulling him down into the nest. Being the human in the relationship means that Bucky puts Steve where he wants him and for their first time, he has him on his hands and knees. “I gotta...” The rest is lost in the fever and the growl that comes out of him is primal. Steve whines and pushes back, needing to be taken.
His arms collapse under him and his face and shoulders rest on the pillows and blankets below him. “please...”
Without prep, Bucky shoves inside and Steve screams into the pillows. There isn’t pain and maybe when Steve is coherent again, he’ll think to ask about that, but for now, he needs in a way that isn’t human. “Oh...jesus...Steve...” Bucky rides Steve hard and Steve keeps pushing back needing more.
Throughout the night, Bucky takes Steve over and over. Each time with a deep-seated need that doesn’t seem to be quenched no matter how many times they couple. By morning, the bond-mates sleep soundly in the nest, with Bucky’s arms tightly around Steve. It isn’t until that afternoon that Steve starts to stir and Bucky is up and heading into the kitchen. They won’t be able to leave the house for several days because at any time the need can overtake them and if in public, things could get embarrassing.
By the time Steve is blinking his eyes open, Bucky is back in the nest with water and juice. “You need to drink these, Love.”
As the word slips from Bucky’s lips, Steve feels the emotion surge between them. Loving Bucky is not new, but feeling the magnitude of that love is. Sitting up, he takes the water first, drinking like a man that hasn’t had water in years. As he takes the glass of juice, Bucky gets up again to refill it and get his own. “You don’t...”
An emotion comes through the bond that Steve doesn’t have a name for. “You’ll have to deal with me like this for a few days. It’s a shifter thing. I have to take care of you.”
Steve blushes as he takes another sip of juice. “You don’t gotta...”
Again, that same emotion comes through the bond. “Can you feel that?” Steve nods, looking up at his very naked, very beautiful...husband. “That emotion that you don’t have a name for, that’s a shifter emotion. I have to take care of you. It’s part of the bonding for a few days.”
“Oh.” Bucky crawls back in next to Steve and the big, blond marshmallow snuggles into Bucky’s side. “Then I’m going to just enjoy it.” As he finishes the juice and takes the water, Steve looks down at his hand. It looks like a tattoo, but it’s very definitely the claws of a bear. “This is why you said I wouldn’t need a ring.”
“Yeah, I hope you don’t mind, like you weren’t against tattoos or anything.” Steve giggles and then he feels Bucky’s emotions overflow with unguarded affection. “It will take a few days for you to get used to the onslaught of emotions too.”
Steve leans up, kissing Bucky’s neck. “How are you doing?”
“I kinda expected you to feel overwhelmed, but you feel so calm.” Bucky kisses his temple and leaves his lips there to linger.
“Well, yeah, I bonded to the love of my life. Why wouldn’t I be calm?” Then it occurs to him and he moves away. “You can feel how much I love you though, right?”
Bucky chuckles and blushes. “Not only can I feel it, but it’s arousing me again.” Steve sits the glasses aside and crawls into Bucky’s lap.
“We have several days of this, so why not do something about it?” Bucky picks Steve up, laying him on his back, throwing Steve’s legs over his shoulders and pushing in again.
As the fall weather turns into winter weather, Bucky wants more and more to shift. Some nights, Bucky will make love to Steve, but when Steve wakes in the morning, he’s snuggled up to his Teddy. As the holidays start, they wait until it’s nearing three in the morning and head to the park. Bucky strips down, with no one to see except Steve, and shifts. He romps and plays in the snow causing Steve to laugh joyously at the freedom.
The office shuts down for a week and Steve invites Natasha and Clint on a shopping trip he’s planning. The four of them head to the Chelsea Market after breakfast and plan to spend the day shopping. Steve is bundled up in faded jeans, a cream cable knit sweater, and a deep blue peacoat, while Bucky’s wearing lighter clothes under his coat. “I’m afraid you’ll get cold.”
Natasha starts to laugh. “Steve, remember what he shifts into. He doesn’t get cold, but we might find him asleep under a table.”
Bucky throws a napkin at her face while she giggles. “Ha ha, Nat, you’re hilarious.”
Clint looks over, then snorts. “Jesus, I just got the hibernating joke.” After lunch they start going through the shops, while laughing and teasing each other.
Steve takes one of his gloves off, so he can interlace his fingers with Bucky’s. “You should put your glove back on.”
Bucky feels Steve’s emotion before the words come out. “I want to feel your skin against mine for a little while.” Bucky raises their joined hands, kissing Steve’s knuckles. It’s perfect, until...
“Bucky? Oh god, Bucky, is that really you?” They all turn to see a woman, staring at Bucky and then quickly taking in the man he’s with.
“Ma?” So many different emotions are coursing off of Bucky, that Steve steps in front of him, gently cupping his face.
“Hey, Teddy Bear, look at me.” Bucky’s eyes snap to Steve’s. “I’m here. Just look at me for a minute.”
Closing his eyes, Bucky lets the love and affection from Steve flood through the bond and wash over him. It calms him and he leans up to kiss Steve. “Thank you.”
“Never have to thank me, Bear. Just keep loving me.” Steve steps aside, so Bucky can see his mother. A man, a little older looking than Winifred, steps up next to her with a little girl about 12.
Winifred steps forward, starting to reach out, but stops herself. She’s got tears in her eyes and a quivering smile on her face. It’s more emotion than Bucky can remember ever seeing in her face. “Bucky, is it really you?”
“Yeah, Ma, it’s me.” Bucky doesn’t know what to do and clings to Steve’s hand.
Winifred looks at Steve, taking in the man with her son and then sees the tattoo on his hand clasped to her son’s. Offering her hand, she smiles through the tears that are threatening to fall. “I’m Winifred Erskine, it’s nice to see that my son found what he needed in his life.”
Reluctantly, Steve takes his hand from Bucky’s and takes the one offered. “I’m Steve Rogers ma’am. It’s nice to meet you too.”
“Erskine?” Winifred looks at her son, then turns to the man and little girl. “Ma, what’s going on?”
The man steps up next to Bucky’s mother, removing his left glove and offers his hand to Bucky. “I’m Dr. Abraham Erskine, your mother’s husband.” He looks down at the little girl, smiling. “And this is our daughter, Rebecca. Rebecca, sweetheart, say hello to your brother, Bucky.”
The little girl looks at Bucky and smiles in the way that only little kids can. “Hey, Buck, it’s nice to meet’cha. You missed my birthdays, so you owe me a lot of gifts.”
Winifred looks down at her daughter. “Rebecca Erskine!”
“What? He does owe me gifts!” Bucky can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of him even though he really needs answers to everything he’s learning. Rebecca looks over at Steve, grinning. “You my brother’s bonded?”
Steve has been smiling since Rebecca opened her mouth. “I am. Does that mean I owe you gifts too?”
Rebecca looks up at her father. “I like this guy. He quick and takes the initiative.” Dr. Erskine snorts at that and leans down to kiss his daughter's head.
“I think we need to find somewhere to talk.” Bucky leads them to a restaurant with Natasha and Clint taking up the rear. Natasha watches all of this with suspicion because she was there when things with Bucky’s family fell apart and Winifred Barnes looked at her son and husband like it was all too much for her to care about. They take a booth in the back, big enough for everyone.
For several minutes, no one says anything, just looks around at the others, hoping someone else will start this conversation. Bucky clutches Steve’s hand under the table and feels Steve’s concern like a current moving to and fro in his veins. The waiter comes, taking drink orders and leaves the table with a side glance. Anyone coming near can feel the discomfort coming from the members of the table. It’s finally Natasha that takes the bull by the horns and speaks up.
“Why don’t you explain how you aren’t a Barnes anymore?” She’s looking accusingly at Winifred and gets a nod.
“Bucky, your refusal to marry that girl and subsequent escape was a catalyst for more than you know.” She looks over at Abraham, who’s giving her a soft smile and nod. “Your father looked for you for a few years. He was determined to ‘beat the disrespect’ out of you and force you into that marriage.” Bucky can hear his father’s words as surely as if the man was sitting here. “When he couldn’t find you, he started to blame me and my family. He was convinced that we had something to do with it and were hiding you from him.”
Bucky knows exactly what that means. “Oh god.”
“Yes, so you can imagine what happened next.” Bucky nods, but Steve, Nat and Clint don’t, so she looks at them. “George got his clan together and decided the best course of action was to attack my family clan.” Steve looks over at Bucky, trying to understand this world that he doesn’t comprehend. “Steve, I’m assuming your bonding to my son is new?” He nods and starts to speak, but she waves him off. “It doesn’t happen now, Steve, but back then, it wasn’t unusual for clans to fight. I had a decision to make.”
“You had to choose between my father and your family.” Bucky watches his mother and she smiles.
“I chose my family and we overtook the Barnes clan without much resistance.” She says it with pride, but her eyes give away the toll that it took on her. “George was ousted and I found out later that he died in some kind of scuffle in Europe. That was the end of my bond with him and sadly, I felt nothing from it.”
Steve looks at Bucky and sees his bonded looking at him. “What?”
“I can’t imagine having something happen to you and not feeling like I was dying too.” Winifred smiles warmly at them.
“This is a good bond, then.” Clint looks over at Bucky’s mother and shakes his head in disbelief.
“It’s a true mating.” Winifred’s eyes snap over to Clint in shock. “Nat and I were there. You wouldn’t believe the light coming off these two.”
Winifred weeps into the shoulder of her husband and his arms wrap tightly around her. “Congratulations to you both.” Bucky doesn’t know this man, but something about him is good.
Looking up, Winifred seems both happy and tormented. “My son found his true mate and I wasn’t there to see it. I’m so sorry.”
Rebecca starts waving her arms around, getting everyone’s attention. “Hold on! My brother found his ‘true mate?’” She even makes the air quotes. “Is someone going to talk to me about how a fairy tale is real?” Cautious laughter bubbles up from the table. “What’s the difference between what you have with Daddy and what they have?”
Winnie reaches over, brushing her daughter's hair behind her ear. “What your dad and I have is a solid bond, meaning we love each other deeply and were lucky to find each other. What your brother has with Steve is more like fate. They were meant to be.”
Rebecca looks back over at Steve and Bucky. “So, which one of you was the princess in the story?” Bucky snorts and pulls Rebecca into a hug.
“I’m going to like you, kid.”
As the Thanksgiving holidays come to a close, Steve goes crazy at home with decorating for Christmas. Bucky comes in from spending the afternoon with his mother and finds Steve baking and the house looking like a sea of lights. The sun is starting to go down and everything glows. “Stevie, Baby, what happened in here?”
“This is me doing what Ma and I did every year and decorating until there isn’t anywhere else to put anything.” Steve’s leaning on the door frame wearing an apron that says, ‘The tree isn’t the only thing getting lit this year’ and Bucky can’t help laughing. “I didn’t ask if you celebrate Christmas, but we did. We weren’t religious about it, but we went a little crazy every year.”
Coming over, he slips his arms around Steve’s waist and pulls him in. “I haven’t celebrated since before I left and it was never anything like this.” He pulls back a bit and looks down at the apron. “Where the hell did you get this apron?”
“I got it from Clint a few years ago. I love this apron.” Leaning in, Bucky kisses him. “Why don’t we go upstairs and continue this in bed?” Steve nuzzles against Bucky’s neck. “I missed you today.”
“Yeah, let’s do that.” As they are heading up the stairs, Bucky stops. “Would you be okay with me inviting Ma, Abram, and Rebecca to Christmas Eve dinner? I know it’s just supposed to be us with Nat and Clint, but...”
Steve kisses him to shut him up. “I’ll text her tomorrow and ask if they want to come. Plus, I’ve bought a ridiculous amount of stuff for Rebecca, so they have to come over at some point.”
As they enter the bedroom and clothes start to come off, dropped onto the floor for later, Steve stops. “Steve?”
The blonde gets a mischievous smile and pats Bucky’s chest. “Wait here, I have an idea.” Steve disappears down the stairs and Bucky waits. Minutes tick by and he starts to think Steve forgot about him. “Bucky! Come back downstairs!”
Bucky jogs down the stairs and finds all of the light off except the tree and on the floor, in front of the fire, is a nest made from the same blankets and pillow from their bonding night. “Oh.” Steve’s standing in the nest, stripped bare and Bucky feels everything. “Steve.” It’s just a whispered praise, but he’s sure Steve can feel what’s coursing through him.
“I thought this would be nice.” By the time Bucky steps into the nest, everything is forgotten except being here in this moment with Steve. Bucky embraces Steve and the skin-to-skin contact is overwhelmingly good.
“This is better than nice.” There’s nothing feral about their coupling that night, it’s just love on a loop through their bond. When Bucky holds Steve against him, back to chest, after, he closes his eyes to breathe in this amazing man.
“Shift for me, Buck.” Seconds later, Steve is embraced by his Teddy Bear. “Love you, Bear.”
There’s a grumble behind him and paws pull him close. Steve knows that he’s safe because he can feel Bucky’s love flowing through and around him. Sinking into sleep, he dreams of the little boy that got lost in the woods and the bear that protect him.