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“I don’t want to go home, kitty,” Marinette said as she and Chat prepared to separate.
The thought of facing her empty and quiet room, the Miracle Box abandoned, made her feel queasy.
“Aren’t you tired, m’lady? It has been a long day,” he said gently.
“Oh, I am.”
She was beyond exhausted. Physical tiredness permeated her whole body, lunch seemed like light years ago and her eyes stung from all the tears she’d shed over the day. But more than that, she felt her mind going in circles, looking for a way out, a solution, a plan, and it was just too much for her to bear.
“Can you just stay with me for a while?” She said in a small voice. The rain looked like it was going to stop, they could stay out for a bit.
She knew that she shouldn’t be asking him that. He had been there for her when she’d needed him the most. Together they had taken back the Rabbit Miraculous. He still believed in her. But she shouldn’t forget that she had no right to ask him for more.
It wasn’t fair. She couldn’t offer him more. She felt like she was being pulled in a thousand directions, she felt so confused and scared. She didn’t have anything left in her to give.
And yet, she felt safe with him. With him there, everything seemed less daunting. She couldn’t let go of him just yet.
“I need to feed Plagg,” he said, as a beep pierced the quiet night air. She also needed to feed Tikki. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.
“Oh, right, sorry. And you probably have to go home.”
He probably had a family waiting for him. And yes, she had her parents and she knew they could offer her comfort. But she couldn’t really tell them what was troubling her, not all of it. And she couldn’t trust herself not to break down in the face of their concern. This could wait.
“No, it’s ok,” he said quickly, making her feel weak with relief. “I’m not in any hurry,” he smiled. “Time as we know it almost got erased tonight. Another hour or more won’t hurt. See you in a minute.”
She felt gratitude fill her heart and push to the side the encroaching darkness. She had him. All was not lost. She was so lucky.
“Eat up, Tikki,” she told her kwami when she detransformed. “I need this,” she added, feeling her cheeks warm up for some reason.
“I know, it’s ok,” the kwami smiled between bites. Marinette was grateful for the understanding. And the fact that she didn’t need to explain. At least to Tikki.
Yes, she had made a mess. She’d need to apologise about a lot of things, again. She’d need to explain everything to Chat. There was also still the whole mess with Adrien to deal with. She had no idea what was going to happen to him. Or Felix. Could she do anything about this at all?
She sat down, resting her head on her knees, just like earlier, before Monarch made his appearance. Then she’d felt helpless, alone and falling apart.
This was no longer true. Chat had been there to help her. His welcoming arms had helped her put the pieces back together. He had helped her feel human again. Was it wrong to crave more of this?
She’d just experienced a sprint through time, the stakes too high to comprehend. She had doomed one of her friends to life in isolation for who knew how long. She’d met her mentor in the past, which had only reminded her how much she missed him in the present. It was no wonder that she needed comfort.
In spite of all this, somehow, she felt strangely tranquil. She wasn’t alone in all this. She had the best partner in the world and this gave her strength to face the next day and everything after that.
Not yet. For now, she could forget about everything else. They deserved a moment to just take a breather. They needed to give their bodies and minds some rest. And they had each other for that.
*
“Are you ok? No lingering effects from time travel?” Plagg asked Adrien when he dropped his transformation.
“I’m fine, Plagg. Eat up. Ladybug needs me,” he said. She was on the other side of that chimney, so close.
“As if you don’t have enough problems of your own,” Plagg huffed, but then shrugged and gobbled up his Camembert.
Adrien thought about everything he had to deal with. His father, for starters. How was he going to explain all this - the switch with Felix, the ruined trip, the whole mess. It had seemed so easy before when he had been under the influence of Risk. Of course, it hadn’t even been so messed up.
And Felix. Oh dear, what was he going to do about Felix? Could he just go to London and demand an explanation? He had no idea how and why Felix had betrayed them like that. He needed to know, but he didn’t know where to start.
Besides, Ladybug needed him. He couldn’t leave her. He’d seen her fall apart too many times in such a short span, more than anyone deserved.
She wanted him there. It felt good to feel her trust. To feel that she was ready to lean on him again. So the chaos of his life could wait.
He returned to her, after calling out to her to make sure she was ready, and sat down on the rooftop. She scooted closer almost immediately, as if she needed the contact. He was more than happy to welcome her back into his arms.
“Well, this was something,” she chuckled. That was an understatement. Adrien still couldn’t believe that he’d had the power of time travel for a while. It was surreal.
“We went back to so many moments in the past. But I wish we could travel to the future. To a time when this would be over and everything would be fine. Hopefully,” he sighed.
“Time travel is no joke and you know it, kitty. Also, not all futures are nice,” she added, pursing her lips.
“Do you have anything to tell me?” he offered. He knew that there was something, but he didn’t want to put pressure on her.
“I will, I promise,” she said. “Not tonight, please.”
He could give her that.
They fell quiet and soon Adrien felt on the verge of sleep. It was peaceful. Fresh after the earlier rain. There was a sense of temporary calm. And she was so warm…
He knew what he needed to do. Ladybug needed him as a partner and a friend. He could be that for her.
He would push aside his feelings for her. Forget about his dreams to be with her, wrap them up in whatever precious memories he had and hide them somewhere deep into his mind. This was more important. He had to focus and be his best self. For her.
But this could wait. Tomorrow, when the hectic chase of Monarch resumed. When he had to face everything in his life. When he had to take charge and try to change things.
For now, he could afford a moment to breathe in her perfume. To soak in the warmth where she rested her head on his shoulder and his arm wrapped around her back. To just live and be thankful for having her there with him.
He could forget about trying to be a better person and just love.