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Language:
English
Series:
Part 1 of purgatorio
Stats:
Published:
2022-09-29
Completed:
2022-10-13
Words:
62,138
Chapters:
75/75
Comments:
23
Kudos:
103
Bookmarks:
39
Hits:
3,487

bury me in the glow

Summary:

“Didn't think he'd just wing off, did you?”

Dean jerks around at the voice. He's jumpy enough as it is, hearing the monsters closing in on fresh meat, circling him for a snack, and Cas is gone. Cas is gone and Lucifer is here and what the hell he's got nothing to deal with any of this. He freezes.

“My brother really doesn't like conflict, Dean,” Lucifer continues, sighing and staring up towards the starless sky. “He'll be back in due time, likely when he deems it safe, or has that overwhelming need to protect you that he often has.” His gaze flicks back to Dean. “But I think we'll be alright without him.”

“You're in Hell,” Dean blurts, unable to hide his panic.

“Was in Hell,” Lucifer corrects. “Then I was riding around in your brother's psyche, and then in my brother's psyche, and now it seems I'm here, free of any anchor.” Lucifer rolls his shoulders in a small, half shrug. “Not as planned, but it works, I suppose.”

Notes:

If you ever want your sanity, don’t write a story that focuses mildly on the actual timeline of the show because looking at that timeline, even with the help of the wiki, is soul-sucking. Hopefully my own timing checks out and if it doesn't please just ignore it, I had one issue that I tripped over months later in my 50-60s chapters and I stared at it for almost an hour in agony. So. Yeah.

For once the Self-Hatred tag is more directed at Castiel than Dean or Lucifer lol.

I swear my next longfic is normal-powered Lucifer.

This is entirely based around the headcanon that Lucifer was more than Hallucination and trying to manifest through Sam and then he got shunted into Cas and Things Happen.

I think, eventually, I explain most of the Weird Shit. At least my logic behind the Weird Shit. "Eventually."

Some things I do that I don’t care that I do:
Occasional sleep and eating are necessary.

Not kidding on the slowburn. Like. Part II is where that’s at and that’s still a slowburn.

Part I is ~64k words, 75 chapters. Part I is done. I plan on weekly posting 1-25, 26-50, 51-75. Part II is almost done and I’m going to hope by the time I’m done posting Part I it will be done. Also I want this fic done by November dammit. I’ve spent too long on this and I WANT TO BE FINISHED and I also want to work on my other longfic but I really wanted this one posted first.

Priorities, I guess.

Anyway I've had this drafted for a bit today and my Anxiety finally just says post so idk, if you follow me on my normal road of weird, I'll see you next week.

Chapter 1: 1

Chapter Text

PART I
bury me in the glow

I want to be the king of my body and mind
Gravity let me go
Before it bruises and blackens me and you
Bury me in the glow

And I find sorrow in idle mind
And solace in being heard

You better run boy run but be afraid
Cry boy cry don't play the game
Gravity holds me down

And it's taking over
I call everywhere, oh
I cry out
♫ Destroyer by Of Monsters and Men

1

Four months, three weeks, and five days ago.

Dean's running.

The woods by now are a familiar brush against his clothing. He knows this forest, embodies the trees, breathes the wind. He became a part of it months—years?—ago and he doesn't think if he's ever free that it's going to leave him. His bones crack a song same as the creaking branches.

Purgatory is a piece of him.

The night closes in behind, shadow in the shape of a maw, cleaving through the underbrush as he vaults a cluster of boulders—the landmark he's been looking for, finally. He ducks a split tree branch, skids through a patch of mud, trips, catches himself, and stumbles just over the first ring of the bloodied magic circle. A second hop has him beyond the next tight-together rings and then he's gulping down a relieved breath of air as he falls, hard, into another body.

“It's coming,” he says quickly on his exhale, clasping a hand to Cas's shoulder and straightening unsteadily. He twists his wrist and flips his crude blade in his grip, shifting his stance in front of Cas after he's caught his breath.

“Did you lay the trap?” Cas asks.

“What d'ya take me for, huh?” Dean replies with a huff.

“You forgot last time,” says a voice from behind them.

Dean scoffs and looks back where in their makeshift camp, center of the ritual circle, sits the devil. Legs crossed, palms up, hands sliced through, blood and grace dripping idly between his fingers.

“You said you wouldn't bring that up again!” Dean barks at him, focusing his attention back on the trees further being swallowed by the tide of shadow. The rumble follows, thunderous as each tree snaps and tears from the ground. Dean sees the burn of yellow eyes somewhere far back in that sea of darkness, and then hears a loud yelp and the yellow blinks out, followed by an ear-piercing howl that he can't help flinch from.

Cas sucks in a breath. “Maybe we... should have waited for Benny for this.”

“Would've been nice,” Dean agrees. The howl sounds again, reverberating angrily through the wood. Even Lucifer makes a hiss of displeasure. “Doesn't seem like our friend was willing to wait. Lucifer, this spell is going to hold, right?”

“Oh, I don't know,” Lucifer sings.

“You don't know? You said yesterday—”

“I believe yesterday I said 'probably,'” Lucifer interrupts. “Would you like to offer some blood to the cause?” he says sharply.

“Would it help?” Dean asks, matching his tone.

“Unlikely,” Cas says.

“Mm,” Lucifer agrees.

The two yellow eyes flare again, and the very forest screams as the shadow coalesces into the shape of a massive—wounded—beast.

Dean laughs and bumps shoulders with Cas, who wobbles just slightly. “Awesome, great, I love this. This'll be fine.”

The beast charges.