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Vala stood in the wide entry to the grand ballroom where the charity gala was being held. Her eyes swept the room. It didn’t take her long to find Sam; however, she didn’t expect to spy her alone at one side of the huge room. It only took her a minute to squeeze her way through.
“Samantha, darling, I thought General Underpants was supposed to be here.”
“General Dork had a little problem with his zipper,” she snorted. “He’s in the Men’s trying to fix it with the paper clip I had in my purse.”
Vala snickered as her mind went down a well worn path. “Ohhh... is he going to... what's that expression you humans use?”
“I hope not! I have plans for him later!” Sam covered her mouth trying to hold in a conspiratal giggle.
Vala’s eyes swept the room once again and shook her head. Nothing promising, just stodgy old people. “I dare say you ought have just taken advantage of his current predicament.”
Sam leaned closer and whispered, “I did offer to do it, er, fix it for him in a little janitor closet down the hall.” Her eyes crinkled in amusement.
“And he turned you down, darling?” Vala sounded incredulous. “Did you show him your bosom? That always works on my Daniel”
“Of course not,” Sam laughed, and tapped Vala’s arm. “The big dork thought I meant only to fix his trousers!”
“How boring of him. Next time show him your breasts!”
“This is a little too public for that!”
“For what?” Jack asked, walking up to the giggling pair.
Sam leaned against him and whispered in his ear. Vala watched his eyes widen and he broke into a grin.
“Tell me more!”
Sam stepped closer and cupped her hand around his ear. Only Vala saw her nibble his ear lobe before whispering something in his ear.
He tried to speak, licked his lips, cleared his throat, tried again, then gave up.
“Samantha, darling, you really need to move over a bit,” Vala cooed, smiling as she raked Jack with her eyes. She winked and started to walk away, stopping to throw back over one shoulder, “Those pants are way too tight!” With that she turned to search out Daniel who was walking up with a fruity concoction better suited to a cabana then a formal gala.
Jack coughed then pulled futilely at the hem of his short Mess Dress jacket. He shrugged then stood slightly behind his wife.
“Daniel darling, Samantha just introduced me to a new word and I was wondering what it meant.” Vala said to the tall blond man that had filled out considerably from his first days as a translator for Jack.
“Which word?” Daniel asked absently as he adjusted his glasses without looking at her.
“What is a dork?”
“A whale penis. Why?”
Behind Vala’s back Jack grinned broadly while Sam sucked her lips all the way into her mouth in chagrin, then proceeded to make an awkward frown. “Let's go get a drink!” she blurted out as she grabbed Vala’s sleeve and forcibly dragged her away.
Jack’s smile mysteriously vanished as soon as his wife was no longer blocking the view.
Daniel’s brows lowered in confusion. “What was that all about?” he asked with a perturbed frown.
“I have no idea Danny.” Jack said with a wholly innocent expression which Daniel didn’t buy considering his eyes were tracking his wife’s extremely attractive six as it moved away.
“So, Daniel, which one has the biggest dork?”
"Er...?"