Chapter Text
From faraway, so far Nancy can barely make it out, is a sound. Then there it is again, panicked and accompanied by a dripping noise. The voice becomes clearer, “Nancy!” She becomes aware of an uncomfortable wet squelching feeling in her hair, behind her back, actually going up the entire backside of her body.
“Please Nance,” Nancy is finally able to identify the desperate voice belongs to Steve Harrington. Her eyes shoot open to see his face turn from horror to temporary relief. As she slowly sits up the memories come flooding back. She shot the dark matter and it exploded sending her flying from the aftershock. And then black.
Steve’s assured grip on her hand helps her up. His assessing gaze is so tender and so concerned, “Are you okay?”
“I think so,” Nancy nods her head not feeling any damage from within her body. She looks up at a giant hole in the ceiling to see the red and dusted sky of the upsidedown. The roof must have caved underneath them after they blacked out from the blast and they must have fallen through. The matter seems to have been their salvation from the fall but ironically is looking more and more like their doom as the seconds pass. Steve holds Nancy’s hand firmly as he points out a door on the other side of the room. They trudge through the sludge together as a team to try to open it. His poor signature hair all matted up from falling onto the goop. The door handle breaks off in Steve’s hand and he quickly and quietly swears. She can tell he’s trying to keep it together for her because she’s doing the same. Trying to calculate and not panic.
Nancy notes the sludge rising and her roving eyes fall on a chair. She might be able to use a leg to bust through the door. If everything else in the room is melting the walls probably aren’t still structurally sound. Steve sees the look in her eyes. He knows she has a plan. So he releases her hand so she can venture away from him towards the chair. When she returns with the broken leg she goes right to swinging at the door with it. Nancy is right and it crumbles under her effort. But to their horror the liquid matter starts to come rushing out the new break in the door. Filling the room faster. Steve immediately hugs Nancy from behind and lifts her spinning up and out of the way of the assault. Then he covers her body against the side wall with his own, his hands framing her head bringing him close to her and shielding her from the rest of the room.
Nancy peers up at him while he’s looking away at the predicament they’re in, his mind clearly racing for a solution. She feels a strength with him by her side that surprises her given their current circumstance. He’s changed so much since they were together back in high school. His confidence is real and steady now. But the warmth that was always there has remained unaltered.
This isn’t brand new information to her though. No, this realization hit her eight months ago. Her last spring break where Vecna made himself known for the first time. Where they were thrown back together to once again battle the plague of the upsidedown. The realization presented itself slowly and unnoticed at first. From her body being flooded with relief when he rolled up and gave her a reassuring smile and wave. She was being questioned at the site of Fred’s murder. To the way he took charge and took care of the whole group as they hunted for a way to defeat Vecna. And she realized that he’d been doing that with the kids all this time since they parted. He had grown, at his core just the same warmth and care and charisma, but now more focused more patient and more self assured. A man who knows what he wants and how he conducts himself.
It takes only a few short seconds for Steve to feel her gaze and turn his attention back to her. He takes only a moment to indulge in her eyes before he nods to the conference table at the center of the room. “Come on, maybe we can climb or shout for help.”
Nancy takes his hand again and they both trudge back to the center of the room. It’s much harder this time given the rise in wild matter. When they reach the table Steve grips Nancy’s hips to lift her up onto it. She struggles to ignore the burn of his steady touch on her body. If she’s being honest with herself, the feeling is one she’s been trying to ignore for almost a year now since she dove after him getting dragging under Lover’s Lake. Through her watching him battle the bats. Through her wrapping his bare stomach afterwards. Through his confession of still dreaming of a future with her. Through him holding her tight when she was released from Vecna’s vision. Through her breakup with Jonathan following that fateful spring break. Which really had nothing to do with Steve or her confusing feelings for him. Through crawl after crawl after crawl. What did that make her if she let herself fall back into Steve’s arms. If she gave into the burn in her body and in her heart. After what she put him through. In front of Jonathan and the others. But their excuses to be on the same shifts didn’t stop. The little electric touches that didn’t need to occur. The lingering glances that lasted a few seconds past casual. The feelings remained just under the surface softly knocking on the door for her to let them in.
Up on the table they shout for help, praying Dustin can hear them. There’s no response. “Nancy come here and let me lift you up. Maybe you can reach the opening if you stand on my shoulders?” Steve is already starting to crouch down so Nancy could climb up his back.
“That won’t work Steve,” Nancy isn’t trying to put his ideas down. People don’t think he’s smart but he is. And he does have good ideas. She just knows this particular one has no shot of working. The matter is unstable. Even if she were able to reach the ceiling it is likely to cave more as opposed to her getting a grip on it. Nancy thinks Steve knows all this too. He is just so desperate to get her out of here. Even if that means he’ll be left behind to his doom. He doesn’t want to accept defeat. It breaks her heart.
“Steve,” Nancy gently pulls his attention to her, “we have to sit down to distribute our weight on the table.”
“No Nance I can get you out. I can do it,” Despite his words Steve halts his movements, desperation and disparity leaking from his tone. He knows his own words would be as fruitless as his plan. He lets a couple tears roll down before following Nancy and slowing lowering himself to sit. Steve props an arm up on his one raised knee.
They both stare in each other’s direction but their thoughts are far away. Nancy supposes that’s what happens when you’re facing your inevitable end. Your life, the important bits, flash through your brain like a high speed train. They’ve certainly had enough practice facing their own deaths
“I don’t think you’re bullshit,” the words leak out of Nancy as she sits on her knees. She looks so much younger, like when she said those words to him for real.
Steve’s attention immediately lights up his eyes again, shock taking over his features. “What,” softly escapes his lips even though he heard exactly what she said.
“I never thought you were bullshit.”
Steve is not often speechless but he doesn’t know what to say to that. Too much relief and hope that are painful to feel. He thinks back to that night. “I shouldn’t have left you that night. You really hurt me. But you were drunk and in so much pain and I should have stayed.”
With Steve’s truth it all starts coming out of Nancy like water pouring steadily from a spout. Nancy doesn’t think she can stop it. But she finds, in the face of death, her fears have done a 180. She spent too long fearing opening up these old wounds and facing what they mean. Now all she fears is not being honest with Steve in their final moments. He deserves that. And Nancy is starting to think she might deserve it too. “I didn’t walk away from our relationship because of Jonathan.”
Steve exhales harshly, all the air rushing out of him forcefully. It isn’t relief. It’s more of a release of pent up feelings he didn’t even know needed to come out. Steve takes a moment before his eyes rise back to her. “I shouldn’t have let you walk away.” He had spent so much time remembering and regretting his three little words, ‘it’s okay nance’. Because it wasn’t okay. And neither was not fighting for her.
Nancy and Steve start to shift towards each other on the table. The need to be closer overriding everything else. Nancy has a bit of water forming in her eyes now too from the impact of finally laying all this bare after all this time. There’s nothing timid in her tone now, “I blamed us for Barb’s death. Blamed myself. Replaying that night over and over again. I didn’t deserve to be happy. You were a constant reminder that I chose my own happiness over Barb and she was gone because of my selfishness. The grief was warping all my feelings, all my vulnerable and precious memories with you.”
Tears start rolling down Steve’s cheeks again from this confession. Potentially the most painful and most impactful one of all. Nancy reaches up to wipe them with her thumb as if she could erase the pain she’d caused him. His cheek leans into her palm as he reaches his own hand up to rub hers. The gesture brings to her attention that she is also crying. Steve whispers, “I thought I didn’t deserve you so I let you slip away without fighting for us.”
“One last confession?” Nancy’s eyes seem to hold both her younger and current self within them at the same time. She knows she’s almost out of time. Steve nods earnestly at her. “You were vulnerable and honest without any expectations from me last spring break and I was a coward. I was lying to you and myself then and I have been afraid. I feared how strongly I felt for you too and what does that make me. You said you didn’t feel like you deserved me, how could I deserve you after everything.”
The hand that was stroking Nancy’s cheek gently slips into her hair and cradles the back of her head. Steve’s tears aren’t stopping. He’s in shock. It feels like a fever dream. Never did he allow himself to have hope that Nancy returned his feelings still. Every hint since spring break he swatted away without letting them take root. But if this is the only time they get, he would be thankful for it. “Because you are caring and strong and beautiful Nancy Wheeler. Because none of this upside down evil is your fault. We both made mistakes but we deserve to hold onto any and all happiness because what better way to fight all the unfair hands we’ve been dealt. Because I still love you.”
Nancy leans her forehead against Steve’s and they breathe in the feelings, the tears, each other for a beat. Then Nancy leans in to press her lips to Steve’s. The impact of everything, this conversation and all the history, hits them like a freight train. Steve doesn’t care how much time they have left because all that matters is that Nancy is in his arms again. And if he has to go, this is how he wants it. Nancy wraps her arms around his neck and slowly straddles his lap. Steve’s grip in her matted down hair pulses as his other hand goes to her hips to steady her and pull her closer all at once.
The kiss is passionate and urgent yet the pace is steady, neither slow nor frantic. They might as well be in a volcano for how molten Nancy’s entire body feels pressed against Steve’s again. It’s both familiar and new. Their tongues stroke each other as their bodies press closer. Nancy isn’t thinking at all as she unwraps her arms and places her hands on his pecks over his sweater. Not a single coherent thought occupies her mind except for ‘Steve’ as she pushes on him and leans all her body weight into his frame. He isn’t thinking either as he moves both hands to interlock their fingers together above his heart. He gives way and lets them lower down onto the table, neither of them able to stand breaking the kiss for even a second. When his back meets the table, their inter-clasped hands land above his head just off the edge with a thunk.
The thunk, while not a hard hit, reverberates through both of them. Nancy tears her lips from Steve and sits up abruptly. At the same time Steve cranes his head back to stare where their hands are interlocked. Surveying the room the matter has stopping melting and has solidified around them. Nancy starts audibly sobbing. Steve’s body lifts up to meet hers and he gathers her in his arms, holding her tightly. The sobs of relief turn to laughter of disbelief. Then their eyes lock and suddenly they’re kissing again, frantically this time. In nerves, in relief, in grief, in disbelief, in joy, in love.