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Arthur had spent his entire life fighting, and fearing magic. It had been ingrained in him from the moment he could make memories.
Magic was evil. Magic corrupted all who used it. Magic was dangerous and it had to be snuffed out. Anyone who used it was already a lost cause or so that is what he was taught to believe, and even though he did question it at times he ultimately didn't trust magic.
Much had changed though since he had become King a month ago after a brutal illness had swept through the castle and killed many including the late King.
But with the death of his father came the return of his illegitimate sister Morgana.
Because on his death bed, his father had revealed that interesting bit of information to him. Just another problem in a long line of his father's many faults.
Morgana had come home one night, and revealed that she had magic, so he supposed the apple didn't fall far from the tree in regards to hiding life changing secrets.
Someone had helped her escape the castle, to the Druids where she had been learning to control her abilities.
Learning of her magic had shaken his beliefs of all that which he thought he knew about magic.
He found himself questioning every action his father ever took, was magic good and his father evil? Was magic something that tainted and warped people or were people their own folly that lead to their downfall.
Although he loved Morgana like a sister even before he knew the truth, he found himself unable to believe that magic was all that she said it was.
After all, if it truly was just a tool then what did that mean for him and his kingdom?
So here he sat at his desk in his chambers reading over old documents from the purge on the banning of magic unsure what to make of his father's laws, when he realized his friend had been uncharacteristically quiet this evening.
"What is it Merlin? You've been rather quiet this evening, I rather miss your incessant prattle," he teased taking a sip of his wine, as he placed down the document he was reading.
"I've been thinking about something," said his manservant fiddling with the corner of his tunic, "Something important that I need to tell you, but-"
"But what? Not that you've ever needed my permission, but you know you can speak freely to me," Arthur responded placing his goblet down and looking towards his friend.
Merlin looked at him face full of nerves that Arthur was not used to seeing on his friend's face, but still he opened his mouth and said, "It's about Morgana, and her magic."
Arthur's face turned sour, he didn't want his friend to discuss this and say how he thought magic wasn't right and she should not be welcome back especially when he hadn't even made a decision on how he felt about magic but still he'd promised his friend he could speak his mind.
"Alright then, what about her?" he asked slowly.
"I was the one who helped Morgana out of the castle!"
He froze staring at his friend as he admits to being the person who helped his sister get out of the cage that was their castle.
"I did it because… because I knew how she felt and I wanted to save her from the fear that I have been living with since I first came to Camelot. I didn't want her to suffer alone…" the man trailed off his fists clenched, as tears began to flood his blue eyes.
But here Arthur stood confused, for what fear could they both share, and why did Merlin not trust him to help them both.
What fear was he talking of, the only fear he could think of was the fear of magic that drove Morgana out of-
Oh
Oh
Merlin has magic, his Merlin, the person he counted on for everything in his life, the person he'd bared his soul to so many times.
He had magic.
He had magic and he lived in Camelot, a place where his very being spelled death.
"Why did you stay?"
"What?"
"I want to know why did you stay in Camelot? Why didn't you run away with Morgana? You would've been safe far safer then you could have ever been here with me," he said slowly pushing his chair back and standing looking at his distressed friend.
"I- I wouldn't leave you, I could never leave you, I told you I'd be happy to be your servant till the day I died and I meant it. If my death came at the hands of a kingdom that wished me dead then so be it, but I would not run and leave you behind to escape that fear."
Oh Merlin his Merlin of course, he would do that for him. Of course he would be selfless and brave and choose to stay by his side through it all.
The thing he was taught to hate and fear most in the world was something that two of the people he loved most both had.
This proved it.
It wasn't evil, because his Merlin could never be evil. The man had just admitted to risking his life to help Morgana out of Camelot but staying behind even though the same danger was here with him too.
So he walked over gently hugging his friend and said, "Although I may not understand magic, or even know everything about you, I know what matters, I know that you are the bravest and most loyal and truehearted man I've ever met and that is all that truly matters to me."
Merlin let out a soft cry of relief as they hugged, in that moment they weren't focused on the law, or their difference in status, or even really his magic.
They were just two people who cared for each other embracing their flaws openly.
So they stayed up late by the fire talking about everything Merlin had never told him.
Arthur and Merlin had sat in his chambers till very late the night before. Arthur listening with an open heart to everything Merlin had to say about his magic, his burdens, his life.
He had done so much for Arthur, and for this kingdom, so as he waited by his desk for Merlin to come in that morning, he came to a decision.
"Can you show me something?" asked Arthur when Merlin entered his chamber's.
"What do you mean sire?" he asked confused.
"Your magic, I would like you to show me something, I've only seen it used for terrible deeds, and I'd like to see it in a different light, in your light," said Arthur mentally slapping himself at the sappy words.
"I mean, I just would like to better understand it," he rambled, and Merlin smiled, his bright warm smile that always made Arthur feel as though he'd done something right.
"Of course, I'd be happy to," he said warmly, and with that he opened a window, cupped his hands and whispered in the ancient tongue as his eyes glowed golden.
Arthur watched as a gentle blue light lit up his friend's palms and as Merlin opened his palm and a blue and black butterfly flew out and towards him perching on his white nightshirt.
He gently coaxed the creature onto his hand and looked at it.
The creature was very beautiful, and gentle, not at all intimidating or scary. In fact it was rather miraculous the way his friend had just created this creature and the first thing it had done was fly and land on Arthur.
"Sorry Arthur, I don't know why it flew over to you, normally it would simply fly off through the open window into nature, although I don't necessarily go around creating butterflies everywhere I go," he rambled.
"It's incredible Merlin," he said still holding the small creature on his fingers as he looked at Merlin.
"You're incredible. Your magic I know you use it to protect me, and I am grateful as I told you last night for all that you've done for me, our Kingdom and our friends, but right here your magic truly feels well like you," he said as the butterfly finally flapped it's wings and flew away.
"Like- like me? What do you mean?" asked Merlin his face turning scarlet.
Arthur looked at his manservant, the person who'd protected him, helped him grow, been his dearest friend and loved him and said, "I mean your magic is beautiful, gentle, kind, wondrous! It is so incredibly you, it feels as if it just slots in to the mystery that is Merlin, and it just makes me love you even more, which I didn't think was possible."
"Love, you love me?" Merlin asked eyes wide.
"I do, I've known I loved you since you drank from the poison goblet to save my life, but I think I loved you long before that. I understand if you do not feel the same and would never pressure you into something, but you should know now that were bearing secrets, this is mine," Arthur said as Merlin starred back at him the energy in the room so thick with emotion.
Merlin simply watched him and so Arthur took a deep breath.
"I love you Merlin Hunithson, I always have and I think I always will."
Arthur's deep secret finally professed he felt a weight lift from his chest as he finally allowed himself to feel that which has been in his heart for so long.
"Arthur, I- I don't know what to say, I never thought this would be possible, I never thought someone like you could love someone like me. I was content to stay by your side and watch you from afar but now you saying this… I love you, you dollophead," he said affectionately with glassy blue eyes.
Arthur felt his heart swell, a smile creeping onto his face as he leaned forward. This time he truly took the first step. Arthur gently cupped Merlin's chin and touched his lips on his.
It was soft. At first, Merlin didn't push back, and for a brief moment Arthur worried he may have made the wrong choice.
Then, Merlin's lips parted as he hungrily opened his mouth against Arthur’s, tongue slipping past Arthur's lips as he wrestled for control.
The moment was heated, desperate, as Merlin’s fingers gripped tightly into his hair. As they slowed and their lips parted, Merlin's eyes glowed golden once more and that strangely familiar warmth swelled around Arthur.
"Sorry, I didn't mean for that to happen, my magic well it somewhat has a mind of it's own," Merlin muttered still embracing Arthur warmly.
"It's okay, it's actually rather lovely, feels safe, loving and familiar. It feels like you," he said gently stroking the raven's hair away from his once again blue eyes.
"I guess my magic loves you just as much as I do," Merlin says softly leaning into Arthur's embrace. "Hmm, I think you're right, and I think that's rather wonderful."