Archive of Our Own

I only have one year left to live.

One year left to hold Melody in my arms, one year left to get lost in Levi’s eyes and wonder how it is possible that there’s so much love for me there. One year left with the family I hoped to never leave.

I never hated my father as much as I do now. If only he hadn’t turned me, if only he hadn’t cursed me to 13 years and a bitter ending I refused to face. When my fate had been to do the rumbling, I didn’t care about meeting my end, didn’t care if it was all going to end in flames. In fact, part of me wanted it to. I wanted to burn with the rest of the world, let it wash away all the horrors I had done, all the ones I had yet to do. The few years I had left to live didn’t matter to me, but now…

As I watch Levi play with Melody, who’s just turned two years old the week before, my heart is equally heavy as it is fond. My heart swells with affection, because fuck, I love them so much. Levi, the love of my life, the only one my heart’s ever wanted, my love, my omega. And Melody, the cutest little girl to have ever walked this Earth, a sunshine in our lives with her big toothy grins and her bright eyes. She looks like Levi just as much as she looks like me, blending our features perfectly.

I can’t leave them. I can’t. It’s cruel that I have to, and it fills me with more grief than what I can handle. If I lose myself in this sorrow any longer, Levi’s going to notice. He’ll smell it in the air, I’m sure. Melody too, probably. She’s very smart, and very attuned to the both of us. Especially me, it feels.

Almost on cue, her stormy grey eyes lock in on me and she leaves Levi’s side, showing me one of her beloved dolls. “Papa!” she exclaims, placing the doll in my hands. “This is your new baby!”

“Is it?” I chuckle, ruffling her hair. “But I already have a baby.”

“She says she no longer is a baby,” Levi remarks with a dry, but very fond tone as he steps closer and sits down beside her, always close just in case she falls. Which she has a habit of doing. Levi’s eyes find mine, suspicious and questioning but he never pushes for answers while she’s around or awake.

Which means I only have a few hours to convince him I’m fine, because it’s almost dinner time and Melody goes to sleep soon after.

“Yeah!” Melody exclaims, her curly, chestnut brown hair bouncing just as she does. “I’m 2 and half! I’m old!”

“Two and a half?” I snort. “Six months passed already?”

Levi’s scent dips. Fuck. Right. It usually does at the mention of time in any capacity. He’s grieving just as much as I am. Still, he smiles and reaches over to gently brush Melody’s hair behind her ear. “You should make a list of gifts you want for your next birthday.”

“I want them now!” Melody insists. “I want a new dress for Stacy!” she adds, showing off the rather rundown clothes 'Stacy' is currently wearing. “Mama, will you make more for me?”

Levi hums, gently taking the doll. “Right now you say…” he muses, giving me a look, “good to know she inherited your patience…” he mutters, trying to clearly fight back a smile that comes through anyway. He hands the doll back to Melody. “Stacy will get a new dress if Stacy learns to pick up after the toys she leaves scattered everywhere.”

Melody grimaces. “But Papa is so much better than me at cleaning up!”

I chuckle. “Am I?”

“No,” Levi gives us both a blank look, “both of you get distracted and I end up doing it.” Sighing heavily, he gently pulls Melody closer, squeezing her. “You’re lucky you’re cute or you’d be in trouble…and you,” his eyes find mine, “you’re lucky I love you.”

I smile. As much as the sorrow keeps plaguing me, Levi warms my heart. He always does.

‘I love you,’ I mouth back, and Melody whines.

“What about me?” She pouts in that cute, irresistible way of hers. “You need to love me more!”

“Oh we do,” Levi teases, brushing her hair out of her face and squeezing her cheeks. “Our love together makes double that, so, that’s a lot of love for you. Tell her,” he looks over to me, clearly finding the situation amusing, “she believes you more than she believes me.”

Melody looks at me expectantly, and I chuckle before sitting down beside them. Melody immediately runs into my chest, and I wrap an arm around her as I move my free hand to gently lace my fingers with Levi’s. “You know we love you more than anything, Miss Melody.”

“I know you do!” Melody squeals. “Just making sure!”

Levi hums, wordlessly brushing his fingers through her hair as he so often does with mine. His earlier spiked scent only becomes more and more muted, his thumb absently stroking my knuckles.

“I still want a new dress…” Melody adds in a quiet whisper.

This brings a small laugh out of Levi. “Yes, yes… you’ll get your new dresses.”

“For Stacy and for Morgan?”

“How could I forget Morgan?” Levi fondly pinches her cheek. “You might get one too… we’ll see.”

“Yes!” Melody throws her hands up victoriously, then gasps and points at Levi. “You should get a dress too! We can match, Mama!”

“Yeah,” I grin, gently squeezing his hand. “You’d look great in a dress, Mama.”

“Stop it…” he gives me a warning look that I’ve roughly translated to down boy over the years, but still smiles at Melody. “We’ll see. You can help me too instead of chasing the poor squirrels and rabbits out the back and terrorising them,” he teases, poking her nose.

She pouts. “But it’s fun!”

“I’m sure it is,” Levi squishes Melody’s face, “I’m sure it’s just as fun to track dirt in, but you know what’s not fun?” He pokes her forehead. “Cleaning after. You two are really one and the same,” he points out, squeezing my hand.

“You love us,” I say, a fond smile on my lips.

“Yeah!” Melody nods. “You love us!”

“How could I not? You two are my world.” Levi pulls Melody closer, holding her to his chest despite her giggled protests that he’s messing up Stacy’s hair by doing so. He presses a kiss to the top of her head and leans over to press one to my cheek. When his eyes find mine, he presses another quick kiss to the corner of my lips. “Now then… I was supposed to start on food, but little miss here distracted me.”

“I can make food if you wanna stay here,” I suggest, and Levi stares at me like I’ve grown a second head.

“Why the fuck would you want to do that?” He blurts out, frowning. “You hate being in the kitchen.”

I shrug. “It’s not that bad. Plus, I have very fond memories of eating cake in that kitchen.”

Okay, so, maybe I'm smirking a little. What can I say? I remember vividly eating him out on the counter when he was pregnant, so beautiful and glowing…

Levi shoots me another warning look. “Eren.”

Melody pouts. “I want cake!”

This only seems to make the deep flush to Levi’s cheeks darken. “Now she wants cake…” he mumbles, giving me an accusatory look. “If you’re both good, you might get cake.”

“I want my special cake,” I say, a grin easily curving my lips.

“If you’re good,” Levi repeats slowly, cupping my chin, “you’ll get it. Be patient.”

“What about me?” Melody whines, squirming in Levi’s hold. “I want special cake too!”

Oh, boy. This is what I get for talking in innuendos in front of a child. I should stop, I know. It probably makes me a questionable dad. But part of me just can’t help it. It isn’t like I magically became unattracted to Levi overnight the moment Melody was born. If anything…

Levi clears his throat. “Right. Sure… and what would like in it?”

Melody hums loudly, tapping her chin and everything. “Strawberries!”

Oh, god. Levi's scent is literally strawberries. Perfect opening. I have to take it.

“Oh, yeah. I really like strawberry cake too.”

Levi gives me a withering look. “You’re insatiable,” he mutters, “we’ll see about that.” He promptly picks up Melody, pushing her into my arms and standing up, mercury pools fixed on me. “You’re not allowed in the kitchen after last time when you attempted lasagna. Think you can manage her for an hour?” He asks, leaning down close… close enough that our lips nearly brush.

Nearly.

Tease.

“We will manage, right Meli-Melo?”

Melody solemnly nods. “Yes!”

Levi gives both of us a scrutinizing look, like he expects us to bring down the cabin in the hour he’ll have his back turned. But then he smiles, pressing a kiss to her head and one to my cheek, before whispering, “that's a better name than little shit.”

He presses another kiss to my cheek before handing Melody her doll and slipping away to the kitchen.

Melody and I start a very elaborate spy game (for her age, anyway) with Stacy being a double agent and Morgan her unknowing friend while Levi cooks Melody and I’s favourite: pasta with a thick, creamy white sauce that Levi had learned the recipe of from one of the kind women in the nearby town. We both devour it when it’s ready, Levi chastising us (mostly me) for eating it too fast and teaching Melody “bad habits”. In my defense, I don’t know how to slowly eat anything, much less the amazing food Levi makes us.

Melody’s face is a mess when she’s done, sauce all over her chin as Levi cleans her up and demands that I go start her bath. There’s sauce in her hair.

Oops?

Bath time is always an event in our household and Melody splashes us more than we get to clean her, but it doesn’t really matter. I was going to shed those clothes the moment we entered our bedroom and get rid of Levi’s too, always preferring to feel his bare skin against mine. It does take a little while to get her to sleep after all that excitement, and our clothes dry uncomfortably on the both of us until we manage to get back to our bedroom.

Levi sheds his clothes immediately once the door is closed (so do I), muttering something under his breath. He reaches for clean, dry clothes, but I stop him before he can. I wrap my arms around him from behind, pressing my body to his as I lower my head and bury it in his neck, inhaling the sweet scent of strawberries.

“Your heat is coming,” I note, pressing a small kiss to his scent gland. Levi’s heats come every six months, at the very least since Melody has been born. Considering he used to have none until he mated, I figure a heat every six months isn’t that bad, even if the alpha in me wishes it was more. It wouldn’t be practical anyway, since Hanji has to come all the way here to take care of Melody when it happens.

“I know…” Levi sighs, leaning back into my touch with a low groan. “I can feel it coming. The annoying fucking itch in my goddamn bones, the aches, how warm it is all the time…” his hand gently lands on my arm, stroking at my skin slowly, almost methodically, “this helps.”

“Yeah?” I hum, kissing his neck once more. “Hanji said they’ll come again, right?”

Levi nods, tilting his head to brush his lips against my cheek. “Yes. We’d be fucked otherwise. I mean…” he shrugs, “there’s the suppressants I asked them to bring over last time in the case of an emergency so, we wouldn’t be completely stranded if they got delayed or couldn’t make it.”

I growl at the thought. “I don’t want you taking suppressants.”

“In the case of emergency,” Levi repeats, “it won’t kill me. I know you don’t like it…” he turns in my hold, cupping my face gently, “it’ll be unlikely though. Hanji comes here every six months anyway to get ‘auntie’ time.”

I didn’t like it at first, because I’m always a little paranoid that someone might follow them and find us here, but I have to admit… without Hanji, heats would be a problem. Melody’s too young to properly understand what’s going on and needs supervision around the clock anyway.

“I’m surprised no one else has come,” I admit, though the thought terrifies me. It’d attract too much attention, as much as I miss my friends and would like to see them. Too big of a risk. I’d never put Levi or Melody in danger like that. I’m thankful Hanji hasn’t disclosed our location to anyone, not even Armin. Though Armin would know better than to come here, I'm sure.

“They probably want to,” Levi leans closer, brushing his lips against mine, “but Hanji wouldn’t. Not without discussing it with us first. Even if they already know what our answer will be," he murmurs, his hands falling to my chest. "You must miss them a lot… if I could, I’d bring them to you in a heartbeat.”

“I know,” I smile, though I’m not sure it reaches my eyes. “But it’s okay. I’m happy with you and Melody,” I add, “and I wouldn’t mind if I had a second one too.”

I'm teasing. Mostly.

“A second one?” Levi repeats with a low chuckle. “You’re fucking crazy. This menace has us on our asses all day, and you already want a second one? Just admit you want the pregnancy hormones.”

“Yeah,” I grin, hands resting on his bare hips before I squeeze. “You looked really hot pregnant, it’s not my fault.”

“There it is,” Levi scoffs, “I know you. Of course that’s where your mind went…” he leans in, pressing his lips to mine again. “A second one, huh,” he muses quietly, “you looked so cute holding her when she was born, I…” he slowly trails off, his once sweet scent suddenly dipping and turning sour. He clears his throat, shaking his head. “I’m not so sure a second would be a good idea right now…”

Oh.

Right.

Shit.

Fuck.

I’m so fucking stupid. What the hell was I thinking, mentioning a second kid? I’m not even making it past the end of the year. I’m already leaving Levi alone with a toddler, what a fucking disaster it would be to leave him with a newborn, too.

I can’t believe I forgot, even for a second. God. I want to punch myself in the face. Hell, I want him to punch me in the face. He wouldn’t, though, even if I asked.

“I’m sorry,” I mumble, averting my gaze. Like a coward. “I shouldn’t have mentioned it.”

Levi’s silent. His scent is as quiet as he is. It’s reactive when he’s happy, sad, angry. But now? Nothing. He’s trying to keep me out, but hints of what he’s feeling still slip out.

Sorrow. Grief. Pain.

“Don’t be…” he murmurs, exhaling heavily and cupping my cheek, turning my head to face him. “I still have hope, you know.”

Hope of what? That I magically won’t die? I wish I could share that hope. Levi’s always been the more hopeful one out of the two of us, while I lose myself in despair.

I let out a deep sigh and lean my forehead against his, my eyes slipping closed.

“I’ll love you until my last breath,” I promise, even if I know I’ll love him far beyond that.

Will he still love me when I'm gone, too?

I don't ask.

I don't want to know.

Every time I’m left to my own devices, I drown. I drown in my sorrows, I drown in the reality that is my death, that it’s coming, and that there’s nothing I can do to stop it. Every day slips through my fingers and I can never get that time back.

Supply runs to the city are the worst, because I’m away from them for the longest time. Yes, it’s only a few hours and we agreed it was better not to bring Melody since too many questions would be raised about her birth. People are too nosy. Still, I hate losing even that little bit of time, even if Melody is always so excited when I bring her back a surprise.

I bring her a tiara back this time and she’s overjoyed, immediately putting it on and running to her bedroom to get into her princess dress. My smile doesn’t reach my eyes as I watch her go, exhausted from the trip. Silently, I walk towards Levi, wrapping my arms around him and immediately scent marking his neck, even if I did it right before I left.

“You spoil her,” Levi murmurs, wrapping his arms around me and squeezing tightly. His scent wraps around me, possessive, sweet and rich. “I missed you,” he trails soft, lingering kisses across my neck. “So did she… asked me every five minutes when you’d come back.”

“I tried to be as fast as I could,” I murmur, keeping my eyes closed as I nuzzle his scent gland. “I missed you too.”

“I know…” Levi’s hand moves to my hair, his fingers gentle as they brush through it. “You seem tired…” he pulls back just enough to look at me, “you can rest if you want. Food will be done soon and once she’s in bed…” he smiles, pressing a kiss to my cheek, “you’ll be rewarded for your hard work.”

As much as I like the sound of that because I know Levi’s rewards usually mean sex, right now, all I want is to hold him and never let go. Not even the prospect of his heat coming in a few days is enough to get me out of this despair, of this low I fall into each time I have to do a supply run.

“I don’t want to rest,” I tell him, “I don’t want to be away from you.”

The concern in his eyes is as prominent as it is in his scent. “Okay…” he gently cups my face, brushing his thumb over my cheek. “I don’t want to be away from you, either,” he admits, bringing me in for a light kiss, “if you want, I can do the next run. Melody would love it if you stayed.”

“No,” I shake my head, the thought alone making me almost shudder with worry and protectiveness I feel too tired to handle. “I’d just worry here the whole time and scare her with my scent.”

As if sensing my moment of distress, his scent almost instantly responds. Soothing, sweet and protective. He wraps his arms around me, scent marking me and pressing kisses to the side of my face as he does.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, “I just…wish I could make it better for you. I—”

“Mama?” Melody’s small, hesitant voice comes from beside them.

Levi pulls away, looking over to Melody. She’s hesitant, staring at us with confusion. She must’ve picked up on our scents.

“Oh look at you,” Levi fondly whispers, reaching down to pick her up, donned in her princess dress and new tiara. “Did you put that on all by yourself?”

She nods, slowly smiling but still staring at us with curious eyes.

“Wow, look at that tiara,” Levi smiles, gently adjusting it and looking to me, “doesn’t she look like a princess?”

I force a smile, pinching her cheek. “The most beautiful princess.”

“I’m going to grow up and be a princess!” Melody declares, throwing her arms up.

“But you’ll always be my baby,” Levi smiles, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

She giggles, squirming in his hold. “I need to get my… my court ladies!”

Levi chuckles, setting her down and instantly she runs off.

The moment she does, Levi slips closer to me, wrapping his arms around my neck. “I made you cake, something to look forward to after your runs…” he kisses my neck lightly, “she helped… and by that I mean, she threw flour everywhere, gave me salt instead of sugar and broke a plate. Otherwise, wonderful help.”

I chuckle, because I can very vividly visualize this happening. “She’s a better helper than I am. I’m just a distraction.”

“Yeah, you are,” Levi cups my chin, bringing me in for a kiss, “but a lovely distraction. Even if you do make a mess of the kitchen. And me.”

“I miss making a mess of you in the kitchen…” I admit, sighing wistfully before I press a kiss to his cheek and then get tempted by his neck. I trail a few kisses there, inhaling deeply. The sweet scent of fresh strawberries always draws me in. “I miss eating you out on the counter… Bending you over…”

Levi makes a small sound, his breath hot and heavy against my ear. “Don’t make me wet…” he whispers, digging his fingers into my shoulder, “you’ll get to… when Hanji gets here. We’ll have the place to ourselves.”

I hum, remembering all the debauched things we had gotten up to the last time Hanji was there. As much as I don’t like being away from Melody, especially now, my inner alpha craves to take my omega apart in a way I can’t if there’s a small child around. My rut is coming too, often in sync with Levi’s heats.

I press a lingering kiss to Levi’s scent gland, closing my eyes and letting his sweet strawberry scent wrap around me. Being near him already is doing wonders to my mood, today’s angst from the supply run slowly dissolving into nothingness. It reminds me how much I love him, how much I need him, though that also reminds me how much I have to lose, how much I will lose.

But I don’t want to delve into that again. I’ve tortured myself enough for the day. I don’t deserve the respite, but I’ll take it anyway.

“I’ll fuck you in every corner of this house,” I promise, nipping at his skin. “My perfect omega.”

“You’re not helping…” Levi groans, his hand slipping up into my hair and lightly tugging at the strands. “But that also sounds great.” He brings me in for a kiss, quick but deep and demanding. “My alpha needs to be taken care of,” he whispers against my lips, grazing his nails teasingly against my scalp, “I’ll make the wait worth it. I promise.”

I know he will.

He always does.

Hanji arrives in the next few days, and just in time, too. Levi’s scent is driving me up a wall, my rut coming faster than I thought it would. Maybe it’s because I feel more desperate than ever to make up for the time I’ll ultimately lose. Probably is.

Hanji brings Melody some new toys, they always do. Some handmade (Levi hates those and calls them hazards), some from Marley and other places Hanji visits before coming here. Every time, Melody is overjoyed, and today is no different.

And as much as I’ll miss our daughter, part of me, the alpha in me, the alpha on the edge of a rut, practically wants to push them outside so I can have my way with Levi.

But then, Hanji says:

“I have a surprise for you, too.”

And then they place a strange vial in my hand, and I frown.

“What’s this?”

Levi’s breath hitches. “Is that what I think it is?”

“Yes,” Hanji nods. “Marley had already started working on a serum to counter Ymir's curse years ago, their intent had been to initially only lengthen the lifespans of their Warriors, as it wasn’t convenient to have to train new soldiers all the time. They stopped their research when they found out the Warrior who took the serum had issues with their Titan form and couldn’t transform more than once every few days. Amongst other side effects…”

“Other side effects?” Levi asks, his voice tinged with worry.

“Nosebleeds. Headaches. Nausea. Shortness of breath. Fatigue. Armin slept for three days a few months ago.”

“Armin took this?” I ask, my eyes finally lifting from the vial I had been relentlessly staring at, part of me not fully believing what I was holding. I still have trouble grasping that the solution to my end could really be this, that this could give me the life I want, the life I crave, the life I don’t want to leave. It seems too good to be true.

“Yes. Roughly 5 months ago,” Hanji confirms.

Levi scowls. “And you’re showing up with this just now?”

“I wanted to make sure it wasn’t going to make things worse!”

Levi frowns. “Well? Will it?”

Hanji looks between the two of us. “If it’s between dying and a few side effects…” they trail off, looking over to where Melody is trying to catch a squirrel. They lower their voice before continuing. “Is it pleasant? No. But it’s something. It’s all up to you,” their eyes lock onto mine, “and fair warning, shifting won’t be as easy. Armin struggles.”

“I don’t care about shifting,” I say, though, deep down, I know that I do, a little. Not because I particularly miss shifting, but because I subconsciously rely on it, rely on knowing that if I needed to shift to protect Levi and Melody, I could.

Still, the moment I’m dead, I won’t be able to shift at all and there won’t be anyone here to protect Levi and Melody, so what does it matter if I can’t shift as much? Or at all, for that matter?

Hanji gives me a skeptical look. They know me well enough by now to know my thoughts. Levi doesn’t say anything, his scent purposely muted. But it’s clear he wants me to take the serum.

“You asked, I delivered,” Hanji looks to Levi, “monitor him and just look after him. I’m sure you already do, but Armin’s fine. He has good days and bad days… but nothing he can’t handle. Unlike you,” they give me a pointed look, “he knows not to push himself. The choice is yours. I hope you make the right one.”

Levi slips closer to me, his hand gently slipping into mine. “We can discuss this later,” he murmurs, looking over to Hanji, “thank you… for everything. I could spend my entire life trying to repay you and it still wouldn’t be enough.”

“Ah… stop it,” Hanji shifts awkwardly, adjusting their glasses, “can’t have something happening to my favorite couple. And her…” their eyes drift over to Melody, still playing with her new toy, “she needs her papa.”

She does, although I’d argue I need Melody and Levi more than they need me. But Hanji doesn’t need to know that. Besides, they probably already do.

“Thank you,” I tell Hanji, nodding at them. “For this and for taking care of Melody.”

“Oh, it’s no problem at all! Someone’s gotta teach her important science stuff! Today, we’ll be collecting bugs.”

“Please don’t,” Levi groans, “she’s already trying to domesticate half the fucking animals that go through the gardens, I don’t need bugs in my home.”

“You’ll love it,” Hanji grins, “she’s a bundle of joy. Have fun you two. I’ll give you a minute to talk.” They very obviously wink-wink in our direction. Levi’s scowl only deepens and Hanji takes the opportunity to rush over to Melody and take her hand, pointing up at the squirrel in the branch.

Levi sighs quietly, his scent finally shifting to normal. “Are you okay?” He asks quietly, his voice betraying nothing.

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Because… this is a lot.” He shuts the door carefully, his hand still tightly grasping onto mine. “I… hoped they’d have this ready in time, god I fucking hoped…” he sighs heavily, running a hand through his hair, “I prayed, can you believe that? I fucking prayed. We still don’t know how full-proof it is but,” his eyes land on the vial, “I really want it to be. Will you take it?”

“Of course I will,” I tell him, gently squeezing his hand. “I have to. This is my only chance.”

Still, it feels too early to celebrate. What if it does nothing at all because I’m on my last year? What if it only gives me a few more years? Of course I’d be happy with getting anything more than what I have left, but it feels terrifying to hope that this is a permanent solution when it might not be. What if this only gives me another year and we’re no longer prepared for my death? Then again, it isn’t like we’re prepared for it now. We barely talk about it, as though avoiding the subject will magically make it go away.

His eyes seem to reflect my thoughts. He reaches out, gentle as he cups my face and brings me down for a kiss.

“I’m not stupid,” he whispers against my lips, “I know this isn’t… a sure thing, we’ll be cautious. See what happens… take it one day at a time like we have been,” he kisses me again and again until I feel wetness against my cheeks. When he pulls back, his eyes are shimmering. “We’ll handle this together. Right?”

“Levi,” I murmur, cupping his cheek and brushing my thumb over his tears. “Are you sad?”

“What?” Levi scoffs, so many emotions flitting across his face in the span of moments. “What kind of question is that? No. I’m happy… shit,” he hastily wipes his eyes, all too aggressively, “goddamn hormones. I have you, I have Melody… Eren,” he places his hands gently on top of mine, “I’ve been happy since I’ve had you. My love, my everything. And now you’ll get to stay…”

“I will,” I smile, pressing a kiss to his forehead. Although I still worry that I won’t, that Hanji’s serum might not work on me or that it might not delay the inevitable for long enough, I allow myself this moment of peace, of relief, of joy that this might not be the beginning of the end after all. “Should I wait to take it after your heat? I don’t want the side effects to start when I have to take care of you.”

Levi shakes his head. “I don’t want you to have to wait a second longer than you need to before you take it. My heat’s not that important."

“Your heat is important,” I insist, “but if you’re sure…”

“Of course I am,” Levi gives me an offended look, “you know I’d never choose anything besides you and your health. There’s no better time than now. Hanji is close by in case something goes wrong and we have the cabin to ourselves.”

That’s true. If something happens, better it be when Hanji is around. Plus, I wouldn’t want Melody to see it. Still, I don’t like having to potentially sacrifice Levi’s heat, but since this is what Levi wants…

“Okay,” I nod, “I’ll take it once Melody leaves. Just in case something bad happens, I don’t want her to see it.”

He nods in agreement, cupping my cheeks and pressing another soft kiss to my lips. “Are you ready to say goodbye? She’s probably collecting bugs as we speak.”

“Ew,” I chuckle, rolling my eyes fondly. “Your favourite.”

“Probably takes after you,” Levi mumbles, giving me a pointed look, “you look like you were a bug collector…”

I don’t get a chance to deny because Melody comes bouncing through the door at an alarming speed.

“Mama! Look, look!”

Levi looks over to her and the smile dies on his face at the caterpillar she waves in his face. “Good fucking grief…leave that outside…”

She pouts. “But it’s pretty!”

“For fuck’s sake,” Levi gives Hanji an accusatory look when they come over, grinning, and definitely proud of Melody and the disgusting treasure she brought, “you’re supposed to watch after her.”

“I am!”

“And this is your idea of looking after her?”

Hanji giggles. “I told her mama loves bugs and all sorts of critters!”

Levi deadpans as Melody still tries to give him the caterpillar.

“Yeah!” Melody wiggles it, “I got it for you mama!”

Levi gives me a hopeless, pleading look before staring down into the hopeful eyes of our adorable daughter.

“Thank you, I… I’ll appreciate it from afar.”

Melody pouts, then turns towards me. “Do you want it, papa?”

Ew. Definitely no. But I can’t help but smile fondly at her, taking her up in my arms despite knowing that caterpillar is definitely going to end up in my hair. “Sure, Meli-Melo. I definitely won’t squash it at all when you leave.”

Melody gasps, holding the disgusting wiggling thing to her chest. “No! She’s my friend now and I’m naming her… Berry!”

“Can Berry stay the fuck outside…” Levi mutters, still glaring at Hanji.

Melody giggles, clearly finding this entire situation very fun. “Auntie said we’ll go looking for more and name all of them!”

“Very educational…” Levi slips closer, gently brushing her hair behind her ear. “Promise to be careful, understand? Don’t go too far.”

Melody nods seriously, “yes!”

“Good…” Levi smiles, despite the sad look in his eyes. This part’s never easy. Even if it’s for a brief time. “We’ll miss you.”

Melody squeals in response, throwing her arms around my neck.

“We’ll see you soon,” I tell her, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek. She returns the favor, and, as predicted, her hand, the one with the caterpillar, lands in my hair.

The comical look of horror on Levi’s face almost makes it worth it. Almost.

“I’ll miss you!” Melody declares happily and obliviously as Levi gently takes her from my arms, holding her against his side and giving me a look that clearly and loudly expresses, ‘remove the fucking bug now’, or something along those lines.

Hanji does it for me, taking the damn thing and putting it in a clear container. “Berry is safe with me! Now, what do you say we go on an adventure, Melody?”

“Yes!” Melody chimes, making grabby hands at Hanji so they take her in their arms.

Hanji squeals happily, picking Melody up and nuzzling her cheek. “Ah you’re so cute and sweet! I’m gonna eat you up! Say bye-bye!” They wave at us, using Melody’s hand.

Melody just giggles, waving. “Bye-bye!”

Levi, despite his earlier disgust, smiles and waves at Melody. “Behave, you hear me? Stay close to Hanji at all times and don’t wander off.”

“Yes!” Melody loudly declares. Hanji smiles, giving both of us a look before heading off.

Levi sighs, his scent tinged with sadness and fear as it usually is when Hanji takes Melody with them. “I hate watching her leave…” he admits.

“I know. Me too,” I say, wrapping my arms around him from behind and taking the opportunity to bury my nose in his neck. “I’ll make it better, I promise.”

Almost instantly his scent sweetens, wrapping around me in return. Safe, it seems to say. “Is that a promise?” He murmurs, his tone light as he turns his head to press a kiss to the side of my neck.

“Mhm,” I hum, nuzzling his scent gland before I leave a gentle kiss against it. “Do you want me to take the serum now?”

His face hardens. “Yes, now. I don’t want to waste time. The sooner we do it, the sooner we’ll have answers.”

“Okay,” I nod, taking the serum out of my pocket. I stare at him, wondering briefly if this is the right course of action. Of course I know it is, but doubt creeps into my mind nonetheless. What if this somehow shortens my lifespan? It shouldn’t, but what if? Or what if I get even worse side effects, what if I become so sick I can’t provide for my family anymore?

“Eren…” he slips closer to me, tender as he cups my face. As if I’ll break if he makes one wrong move. “I…” he pauses, sighing heavily. “If you don’t want to do this right now, I… I understand. I don’t want you to feel forced to do this if you’re not comfortable. I just…this is it, the answer, what we’ve been waiting for. No matter what happens,” his hands lightly close around mine holding the serum, “together, remember? We’ll handle it.”

“I know,” I let out a shaky breath I didn’t know I had been holding. “I just hope this works.”

“Me too…” his voice is barely above a whisper. He leans close, pressing another kiss to my lips. “If I could take it for you…I would. In a heartbeat. Side effects and all. I just…” he exhales heavily, looking down, “I want more time. Melody needs you…I need you.”

“And I need you,” I tell him, resting my forehead against his. My decision’s been made, but I still linger, inhaling his sweet strawberry scent to ground me. We stay like this for a moment, before I finally pull away and take a deep breath, staring at the serum. I realize staring at it won’t do anything to help me, though, so I pour the whole thing down my throat and set the empty vial aside.

At first, nothing happens. I feel no different, as if I just drank water, though this did not taste like water at all. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but nothing at all feels… anticlimactic. Shouldn’t I feel a little different? A part of me almost expected I’d find myself in the Paths, stared down by Ymir, or something.

But… nothing. Nothing at all.

Levi seems to have expected something grand as well, because he’s staring at me, confused and apprehensive. Silence falls for at least a whole minute before he releases a heavy sigh.

“Do you… feel any different?” He asks slowly, eyeing me up and down.

“No.” 

“You don’t smell different…” he mumbles, gently pressing the back of his hand to my forehead and then my cheek. “We should’ve asked Hanji more about the side effects, we’re fucking stupid,” he shakes his head, “tomorrow. For now…” his hand falls from my face to my chest, “we’ll keep an eye out. If anything happens… I’m right here to take care of you.”

I smile. “I’m the one who’s supposed to take care of you.”

“Why can’t we both do it?” He lifts his chin defiantly, giving me a hard look. “None of that. I will take care of my alpha…just as you take care of me.” He loops his finger under the neckline of my shirt, pulling me in for a kiss I easily return, melting against him like I have so many times before.

“I love you,” I mumble against his lips, cupping his face in my hands. “My omega. My Levi.”

Like clockwork, Levi’s scent sweetens, filling the air in the cabin. “I love you,” he murmurs against my lips, wrapping his arms easily around my waist to press closer. “That will never change.”

God, I really hope it never does.

The headaches start in the middle of Levi’s heat. They start when I had almost forgotten about them, when I thought the serum was agreeing with me and I wouldn’t feel anything different for a long time.

Frankly, the lack of change had freaked me out, but Levi’s heat had served to be a wonderful distraction we both welcomed. Still, as the headaches start to pound into my head into a full-blown migraine and my chest starts to squeeze in an unfamiliar way, I realize now that whatever the serum did, it’s finally starting to take its toll.

I get out of bed with a severe case of nausea and barely make it to the bathroom before I hurl in the toilet, flushing away its contents before Levi wakes up and smells the awful stench that came out of me. I brush my teeth not once, not twice, but three times and it still doesn’t feel like it removed everything. Probably because the smell is in my nose, putrid and disgusting.

“Eren…” I hear him whine from the bedroom, and I splash my face before I exit the bathroom, hoping I don’t look like the mess I currently feel.

“I’m here,” I murmur, slipping back into bed and wrapping my arms around him, burying my face into his neck and inhaling the sweet scent of strawberry, always amplified during his heats. It helps, though the migraine rages on. Fuck.

“Eren…” he murmurs again, dazed and sleepy, until his scent shifts suddenly and he sits up, staring at me with uncertain eyes. “You smell different…” he frowns, eyeing me, “are you okay? You don’t look okay…”

“I’m fine,” I assure him, though I’m really not. But it doesn’t matter. I won’t let it matter. “I’ll take care of you,” I add, pressing a kiss to his neck. “My omega.”

He doesn’t seem the least bit convinced, staring at me with worried eyes. “And I said I’d take care of you too, remember?” He cups my cheek, leaning closer to press a kiss to my forehead. “You feel warmer than you normally do…”

Ugh. I can’t hide anything from him, can I? Especially not during his heat or my rut. We’re even more attuned to each other than usual.

“The side effects started,” I admit, wishing I could’ve held out until his heat was over to tell him.

“Fuck…” his face falls and he turns to face me, “should we get Hanji? How bad is it?”

I shake my head. “I can’t. My rut started and… if anyone sees you in heat, even a beta, I’ll attack them. I can feel it. I don’t want Melody to see me like this either.”

“I can make you something, for the pain,” he offers, gently cupping my face, “Hanji brought over all those herbs last time. I had them stored. If it gets really bad, I’m taking the suppressants and getting Hanji. It’ll be… fucking awful,” he sighs frustratedly, “but I don’t want you in pain.”

The thought of him taking suppressants makes me want to hurl again, though for entirely different reasons. I place my hands on his, gently squeezing his fingers. “Please don’t take suppressants. It’d kill me.” Dramatic, I know. And maybe outside of my rut I’d be able to consider it, but now…

“Don’t say that,” he frowns, gently pressing kisses to my knuckles. “If there’s no other choice and I can’t help you find relief, then our only option is Hanji.” He leans in, pressing his forehead to mine. His scent strengthens, wrapping around me. “But it’s a last resort. Don’t worry. I’m not going anywhere right now.”

“Good,” I say, gently pressing my lips to his. “Don’t go. I need you.”

“I only want you safe,” he whispers against my lips, his fingers slipping from my face and into my hair. “I can’t stand knowing you’re in pain and your scent…” he frowns, “you smell like you’re in pain. I want to fix it, I need to.”

“I know,” I tell him, because I understand. Whenever Levi’s scent shifts because he accidentally stubbed his toe or hit his knee, I go into overdrive, wanting to immediately fix it and kill whatever it is that hurt him. I’m the same with Melody, but it’s even more primal when it comes to Levi.

“Let me at least make you tea…” he smiles slightly, “you can come with me if you’re feeling up to it. If anything, it’ll be soothing. I just want to take care of my alpha,” he presses a lingering kiss to my lips and then my cheek, “I love you.”

“I love you,” I easily say it back, wrapping my arms around him and pulling him into my lap. “But I don’t need tea. I just need you.”

“I don’t think I’ll be able to soothe the side effects much…” he wraps his arms around my neck, pressing a tender kiss to the top of my head. “Now if only slick had uses for such things, can you imagine?”

I smile, trailing soft kisses from his jaw to his neck. “Maybe it does. We won’t know until we try.”

His scent shifts, the hints of worry and bitterness smoothing into syrupy sweetness. “Fuck…” he releases a shaky breath, “you’re making me wet. I’m trying to stay focused. You’re making it difficult.”

“Oops,” I say, though I do not feel sorry at all. I trail kisses back to his lips, drinking in that sweet scent that’s driven me crazy for years, ever since I smelled it for the first time. “Maybe I should eat you out, use your slick as medicine,” I hum, dazed with his scent surrounding me. “Maybe you should ride my face.”

“Good idea,” he breathes out, sucking lightly on my lower lip, “I need you… I need to feel you…” he presses a hand to my chest, pushing me down on my back. “Are you sure?” He still asks, his brows furrowed. “You feel up to it?”

I nod. The headache is still there, but the need to hurl has dissipated, leaving room for the familiar heat in my gut that makes me want to ravage him and make him mine over and over again. Maybe if I wasn’t in rut, the headache would be too pronounced for me to ignore it, but my instincts make me want him more than anything else.

He looks somewhat unconvinced, but I can tell from his scent and the slick that’s been steadily dripping onto my skin that he can do very little to ignore instinct, even if he is proficient at it. He presses another kiss to my lips before crawling up to my face and situating himself on top of me, his thighs next to my head and his scent even stronger than before.

“Have it your way,” he rasps, reaching down to gently smooth out the hair on my forehead. “If it’s too much, we can stop.”

“It won’t be,” I assure, leaning up and licking a strip up his entrance, sweet slick falling on my tongue. Fuck, it tastes so good. Fucking perfect. Yes, this is definitely what I needed. Levi and his addictive slick. “Ride me,” I demand, hands resting on his thighs. “My omega.”

“Fuck…” Levi moans, “how can I refuse when you ask like that?” He teases, despite the tremor in his thighs and how flushed he already is. Slowly he sinks down on my open mouth, releasing a shaky moan as he does. He begins to rock his hips, groaning and gently tugging at my hair.

God, he’s beautiful like this. I’m mesmerized. Then again, Levi is beautiful no matter what, but I do favor seeing him on top of me, chasing after his own pleasure and using me for it.

One of his hands shifts to grab at the headboard with force, a short gasp escaping him when I press a tongue inside. His thighs squeeze around my head as he grinds down harder, soft moans filling the room.

“Eren, fuck,” he shifts and suddenly I feel him leaning back, just enough to wrap his fingers around my length, “I want to make you cum…”

“You will,” I assure, thrusting into his hand as I double down on my efforts and eat him out like my life depends on it (maybe it does), gathering up all the slick that slips out of him on my tongue. I pull away only to breathe, and even then, I don’t waste much time on that. “I’ll cum inside you and fill you up, how does that sound?”

He groans, his scent thickening in the air until it’s the only thing permeating from our bedroom. The motions of his hand falter each time I press my tongue inside, fucking into him in a steady pace.

“Yes…” he breathes out, rolling his hips against my mouth, “please… yes. I don’t want to waste a single drop…”

I’d smirk if my mouth wasn’t otherwise busy pleasuring my beautiful omega, dragging more delicious sounds from his lips. It fills the room, his scent hot and thick as it sweetens even more until all I can smell are ripe, juicy strawberries around me. My headache is gone, healed by Levi and the wonderful taste on my tongue.

I can feel myself coming close to my climax and so I pull away, letting out a heavy breath before I maneuver Levi off of me and pin him to the bed, spreading his legs and pressing his thighs up, practically folding him in half before I slide inside him with a low, guttural growl ripping from my throat.

He looks so beautiful under me, all flushed and needy. My hand travels up his chest until it reaches his neck, marvelling at how red his mark is every time his heat comes. Almost as if I just recently bit him.

“Eren…” he breathes out my name in between sharp gasps, arching up and moving his hips with a low groan. “Fuck… I’m so close, please…” he reaches up, his fingers digging into my neck and pressing into my sensitive scent gland. As always, he’s impatient as he rocks against me, clenching tightly around me.

“Don’t worry, omega,” I murmur, sliding my hand back down his chest until I reach his erection and wrap my hand around it, giving it a sharp tug. “I’ll make you cum and knot you. Fill you up like you want it.”

“You know me so well,” he breathes out with a shaky laugh, as he yanks me down by the throat into a bruising kiss. His moans are soft and muffled against my lips as he continues to roll his hips to meet my thrusts. “Eren…” he murmurs, sucking lightly on my lower lip, “if… if the serum works, we can have another one…” his eyes meet mine, his face flushed impossibly red, “would you like that?”

“Fuck,” I exhale shakily, nodding wordlessly before I bury my head in his neck, biting at the soft skin I can never get enough of. “I want to breed you, so fucking bad. Every time,” I confess, snapping my hips faster and dragging out moan after moan from him.

“I need you to,” he breathes out, wrapping his arms around my neck, dragging his nails across my back and shoulders, digging them into my skin each time I slam back into him. “We can have so many of them,” Levi whispers, licking and biting at my neck, “that would be so nice…”

“We’ll have an army,” I tease, and the laugh that leaves him is nothing short of beautiful, especially the way it dissolves into a high-pitched moan I so love to hear. I pull my head up, looking down at his face twisted in pleasure. My hand speeds up around his length, increasing the pressure. “Cum for me,” I demand, licking a stripe along his jaw. “Cum for me, my omega.”

“Fuck, Eren…” he pants harshly, a low and guttural growl rumbling from his chest, mixing with a moan as he arches up into me. His scent sweetens, as it always does when he orgasms, filling the air and wrapping around me possessively. Beautiful. And then he clenches around me, trying to already lock me in place as he continues to rock his hips and claw at my chest.

“You want my knot?” I ask, and he nods, like the good omega he is. Fuck, he’s perfect. I wouldn’t be able to last any longer even if I tried. I still quicken the pace, slamming hard and deep inside him as I grip onto his thighs even harder, burying myself fully as I chase my orgasm. I cum hard, emptying myself in hot spurts he swallows whole before my knot starts to inflate, filling him up in the way I know he craves right now.

Sweet, syrupy strawberries fill the air as his hands drag up to my neck and he brings me in for a deep kiss. He still continues to move his hips, slow and gentle until he gradually stops, shuddering against me when I press against his overstimulated sweet spot. When he breaks from the kiss, his breaths are heavy and I can feel him throbbing around me.

“I never want to move again,” he mumbles, his voice hoarse.

I smile, pressing gentle kisses on both of his cheeks, then his nose. “I’ll carry you anywhere you want to go, then.”

That brings a smile to his face. “Yeah? Like this? I won’t complain. What a good alpha you are,” he teases, gently caressing my cheek. Suddenly though, his scent drops. “Fuck, your headache, I… are you okay? I completely forgot.”

“I’m fine,” I assure him, trailing soft kisses down to his neck. “Your slick healed me.”

“You’re bullshitting,” he mutters and then raises a brow, eyeing me curiously. “Seriously? You’re okay? You’re not just… being you?”

“I’m serious,” I tell him, kissing his raised eyebrow. “I always said your slick was magic.”

“I figured that was just…alpha figure of speech,” Levi muses, gently carding his fingers through my hair. “In that case, we should… probably test out the theory.”

“Yeah?” I grin. “And how do you want to test that, hm?”

A mischievous smile slowly grows on his face. “Well…” he starts, rolling his hips up with a shuddered moan, “I could ride your face each time… see how long it takes you to feel better, that’s one way of going about it…”

I slide my hand up his chest, a low hum leaving my lips. “Are you sure that’s not an excuse to ride my face? Not that I’m complaining. You can use my face any time, omega.”

“I don’t need an excuse to ride your face, alpha,” he points out, setting his hand on top of mine, lacing our fingers, “you’re mine. I’m just graciously offering myself up, since apparently slick is a healing remedy for you. Though…” he smirks, “are you sure that’s not an excuse?”

I grin. “You think I need an excuse?”

“Touché,” Levi chuckles, bringing me in for a light kiss, “then we can settle this on scientific curiosity. If Hanji heard us discussing this, they’d want to document our sex life…”

“They already want to do that,” I snort, playfully rolling my eyes. “Let’s not give them any more ideas.”

“No, these ideas are for us only,” Levi points out, squeezing his legs around my waist, “we should do this in the kitchen next, for nostalgia’s sake.”

“You should make me more cake,” I suggest, pressing a trail of kisses down to his neck. “Put some of your slick in it.”

“You’re a freak,” he bursts into quiet laughter, shaking his head. “That would be disgusting… bet you’d really like it though, wouldn’t you?”

“Oh yeah,” I lick a stripe up his neck, biting down on his jaw. “I’m sure it’d heal me from headaches.”

He groans, his scent sweetening. “Fuck… don’t make it sound scientifically reasonable, I’ll end up actually fucking doing it. You know I can’t say no to you and that pretty face of yours…”

“I know,” I grin, looking down at him and losing myself in those mercury pools I love so much. “I want your slick cake.”

“God, that’s disgusting,” he starts to laugh even more, covering my mouth with his hand. “Just… eat cake off of me like a normal person.”

I kiss his hand, grinning all the more against it. “I can do that too. I can eat slick cake off of you. Maybe with some slick icing…”

He groans louder. “Eren, you're insatiable. But how can I say no?” He cups my face, pulling me into another kiss that ends with him biting into my lower lip. “We could forgo the cake, have fun with icing instead. Maybe honey.”

“You want me to put honey all over you?” I hum, kissing his hand. “That can be arranged.”

“Sounds disgusting, but I’m too horny to care,” Levi muses, “I’d let you. Honey and slick, yum.”

“You love your slick. At least when it’s on my tongue when I kiss you…”

He gives me a look. An attempt to keep a straight face, but very quickly dissolves into a smile, his eyes blown with lust. “I can’t deny it. My alpha…” his fingers slip to the back of my neck, squeezing lightly, “tasting like me… It’s addictive. I can’t help it. Can you blame me? Like you don’t get hard all over again tasting yourself on my tongue.”

I grin. “I never said I didn’t.”

“So many things to do…” he pulls me in, running his tongue over my lips, “I’ll never be finished with you.”

I'll never be finished with him, either.

And now…

And now, maybe we actually have a chance at forever.

(God, I really hope so.)

1 year later

If my calculations are correct, I should've died a month ago.

And yet…

Here I am.

Alive.

Not just alive, either. Alive and well. The headaches are gone, the nausea has subsided, and the other strange side effects that plagued me are fully gone. Sure, sometimes, I feel a little more fatigued than I used to be, but it doesn't matter in the slightest. There's also the possibility that my shifting abilities have diminished, but… I don't know. I haven't tested it; it's too risky. If caught, we're have to uproot their lives, or worse. I refuse to risk it… especially now that Levi is pregnant again.

With twins, apparently. Not that I fully understand how Hanji knows this. Still. I couldn't possibly have been more glad to learn that the cure worked and I didn't die when I was supposed to, because… well, shit. Leaving Levi was already hard enough to conceptualize, but leaving him with a toddler and twins made me feel like I was drowning.

We hadn't even planned for it. Hanji thinks it happened because the cure made me less in control of my healing abilities, and before it, I had been subconsciously making myself infertile in fear of leaving Levi with more than he could handle. Nothing any one of us can prove or disprove, but I suppose it's true. Levi got pregnant six months ago during his last heat, and…

Well. Safe to say my healing abilities were in the gutter. I was plagued by headaches, even accidentally cut myself preparing food for Levi, and it took a whole week to heal.

Scrapes don't take that long anymore, but I don't quite steam the way I used to. A minor cut still take a few hours to heal; it's not instant, no matter how hard I concentrate.

Frankly, I don't care. This is a small price to pay to be able to live.

I know Levi hates my slow healing, though. He doesn't say it, but I've noticed how much more careful he is with me, now that we know I don't instantly heal from anything. Every cut, every bruise, every scrape makes his eyes cloud with worry, no matter how he tries to hide it. I can't even blame him. Every time he gets pregnant, well—

"Papa! Papa! Mama needs help!"

What?

I immediately drop the axe I was holding, rushing inside to find Levi… preparing food as usual, looking the same as when I left to chop some wood. His scent is as calm and collected as usual, focused.

I frown, coming to a stop beside him, placing a hand to the small of his back. "Is everything okay? Melody said you needed help."

"Huh?" Levi frowns, his gaze shifting up from the cutting board to my face, confusion evident on his face and his scent. "I’m… fine. I just dropped the damn fork," he makes a face, "may have said fuck a bit too loud, but… you two," he gives Melody a look, who’s hiding behind the wall unsuccessfully, "and your worrying. I’m fine. But now that you’re here," he smiles, "can you tell me if the icing I made tastes good? It’s for tonight’s cake."

"Cake!" Melody exclaims, rushing to the both of us with arms raised high. "I want cake!"

I ruffle her hair, relaxing a little. "You inherited your love for cake from me."

"She inherited many things from you," Levi gives me a fond look before scooping up some icing a spoon and holding it out for me. "Go on. Try. If papa approves," he looks to Melody, "you get some too."

Melody makes grabby hands to take the spoon, but obviously, she's too short. I chuckle, leaning forward to get a taste, which, of course, is absolutely divine. My traitorous mind goes back to our conversation about putting slick in the icing, and Levi gives me a warning look when my scent shifts, a little.

"It's good," I nod appreciatively, sliding my hand towards his waist before I lean down and kiss his cheek. "As always."

"Good. If adjustments need to be made," he gives me a very telling look that tells me he definitely knows what I thought about, "we can talk about it after dinner. Now your turn," he smiles at Melody, bringing the spoon to her eager hands. She naturally grabs the whole thing and sticks it in her mouth.

"So good! I want more!"

Levi chuckles, ruffling her hair and taking the spoon back from her before it ends up under her pillow for the next month. "Dinner first. You know the rules, young lady."

Melody pouts. "But cake is so much better…"

"Maybe one of these days we can only eat cake for a whole day," I muse, and Levi squints at me. I shouldn't be saying this out loud, probably, because now…

"Yes!!!" Melody excitedly exclaims, grabbing onto my legs. "Tomorrow!!!"

Levi hums under his breath, giving me a very ‘now look what you’ve started’ look, though the fondness is as clear as day.

"I’m assuming this will become a tradition now?" He sighs, setting the spoon aside. "Only if you eat your dinner. Both of you."

"Hey, I eat my dinner…" I point out, even if there had been plenty of time before Melody was born that I elected to eat him instead of what he prepared.

Oops?

Levi gives me a disbelieving look. Clearly he's recalling the very same times I am…

"Right," he shifts his gaze back to Melody, giving her a smile, "it's your favorites tonight, so I'm expecting demands for seconds. Want to help me set the table?"

"Yes!" She declares excitedly, and then looks to me. "Papa, will you help me?"

"Of course, Meli-Melo," I reply, taking Melody's hand into my own and letting her guide me to the table. Of course, she totally forgot to bring anything with her.

(Me too, but, shhh.)

"I've thought of a name for the babies!" Melody proudly declares, climbing up on her chair. "Kali! I read it in a book!"

"Kali, huh?" I chuckle. "And what of the other baby?"

"They can both be Kali!"

Levi hums, bringing the plates since we both forgot them. "How will we tell them apart then? Hope for the best?"

Melody proudly nods. "Yeah!"

"And what if they're both boys?" I ask, looking at her fondly.

"They can still be Kali!"

"Well," Levi nods, handing her cutlery to set out, "it's decided then. We'll be having Kalis. Good to know," he flashes me a smile, "we can stop our search for names."

"Kali 1 and Kali 2. It's decided," I say, and Melody claps in response.

"I want a Melody 2 now!"

Levi's brows shoot up into his hairline before he shifts his gaze to me. "Would you look at that, she wants another sibling. We're going to be at this for a while."

I grin, because of course I do. There's nothing I want more than to live a long, happy life making countless babies with Levi. Of course, I know it's not technically possible, and I wouldn't want to condemn Levi to a life of endless pregnancy, but fuck, my inner alpha sure loves the thought.

Melody starts brainstorming more names, because obviously she does. She decides, on a whim, that Kali 1 and Kali 2 isn't practical, so she names the other twin 'Chiaki', yet another character from the children's storybooks that Hanji brings with the toys, who is going to be obviously named 'Kiki'.

I can't help but be overly fond, knowing I'll love these two twins just as much as I love Melody, and any other children Levi and I might have.

The rest of the world might be burning in flames, and I'll always feel guilty for choosing my own peace and happiness over the freedom I was meant to seek, the protection I was asked to give the people of Paradis, but…

There's not a day I regret my choice. And now that I have a chance at life, a chance to live the rest of my days with the family I chose, I know I made the right decision. Maybe it's selfish. Maybe it's wrong.

Or maybe it's right. Maybe this is the life I was always meant to live. Maybe being with Levi and our wonderful children is what I was made for.

But even if it wasn't…

It's what I want. It's what I choose.

It's what I'll always choose.

Always.