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"But ... um ... well, Hakkai?"
"It's all right, Goku, take your time."
It's just ... just that it's not what you told me! I mean, you told me about babies and all that, and you even explained about you and Gojyo." Goku cringed at the recollection. "But this? You never told me nothin'!"
Hakkai looked at Goku for what felt like an eternity before gently sitting upright, careful not to disturb the tiny flowers that grew all around him. The accompanying vines followed his movements, though, coiling more tightly around his arms and legs the farther he got from the ground. Hakkai smiled at the vines with what Goku could only identify as fondness. It was the same patient look he'd given Goku during lessons. When he looked back at Goku, his smile deepened.
"I didn't know there'd be anything to tell."
*****
Goku returned a few days later. He kind of had to, considering Gojyo was too drunk to make it home on his own. Maybe Hakkai could tell him more now since he'd had a few days to think about things. Maybe it had all been some sort of lesson? But the closer Goku got Gojyo to his and Hakkai's home, the faster his heart beat, because those tiny flowers weren't all that tiny anymore.
They were huge, for flowers. Tall and obviously strong, with wide stalks and petals the size of dinner plates. Their intense blood-red color seemed to reach all the way through Goku's chest and squeeze so tight he thought his heart would be crushed by the pressure.
Goku turned his gaze to Hakkai, sitting on the ground, not so carefully now that the flowers had grown sturdy. His upper body was swaying in time with thick stalks that allowed the evening breeze only so much influence over their movements.
Stumbling away from Goku, Gojyo's gaze flicked back and forth between Hakkai and the flowers as if he couldn't decide which mesmerized him more, but somehow he made it to Hakkai's side. He sat down heavily and put his head in Hakkai's lap. Goku felt out of place despite the smile Hakkai gave him in greeting because Hakkai's fingers were in Gojyo's hair and they were both so wrapped up in each other and the flowers--their flowers. Their--
Goku ran all the way back to the temple.
*****
"Sanzo? I, um, was wonderin' ... I mean, I know you don't know much about makin' babies and all that--"
Sanzo reached for his fan.
"--and the last time I got you a plant for your desk it died a heckuva lot quicker than it really should have, but--"
Sanzo gripped his fan tightly.
"--I really wanna understand how Hakkai and Gojyo could--"
The wood of Sanzo's fan cracked between his fingers. Which, Goku figured as he ran out of Sanzo's office, ears ringing from Sanzo's screaming dismissal, was a lot better than if it'd cracked over his head.
*****
After that, Goku tried looking in books for answers. He had gone to the local library and everything, but hadn't found either When You Were Inside Mommy or From Seed to Plant all that helpful. The librarian, Mrs. Tan, had asked if he required assistance, but Goku hadn't been able to bring himself to put her in that particular position.
So Goku avoided everyone and spent several weeks sulking around the temple until his self-imposed claustrophobia got to be far too much for him to take, at which point he found himself wandering through the village on a bright and sunny Saturday morning. It was almost lunch time, and ramen stands were open and drawing hungry customers. Fruit and vegetable vendors had likely been busy since earlier in the morning, but they still had a good variety of produce on display.
Since the Minus Wave had fizzled out of existence, life had been good to Goku's corner of the world. People were happy, busy, and friendly again. Okay, Sanzo was still pretty grumpy, but sometimes--sometimes--Goku had the feeling it was mostly out of habit. Hakkai and Gojyo had definitely been happy, moving back into their old house after Goku helped them fix it up to Hakkai's standards, and Goku couldn't say he'd been all that surprised when he caught them kissing in the kitchen.
But this ....
Goku wanted to be happy for Hakkai and Gojyo, he really did. He was happy for them, truth be told, but Goku was used to picking flowers and smelling them, not wondering if they considered him an uncle.
Goku shook those thoughts from his head and continued walking through the marketplace. He had spending money from Sanzo--an actual paycheck, one he'd earned now that he was officially the temple's caretaker--so he figured a bowl or two of ramen would help his brain work it all out. It was worth a shot, anyway.
"A bouquet for your girlfriend?"
"Huh?" Goku stopped in his tracks and turned toward the sound of the voice. He hadn't even noticed that he'd been passing right by a flower seller's stall. The woman smiled at him and held up a bunch of pink orchids.
Goku walked closer, breathed in the smell of the myriad of flowers on display, and found himself amazed by the variety of colors and scents. Roses, plum blossoms, chrysanthemums, and peonies decorated the table, and they were all beautiful, but Goku couldn't help but notice that none of them were anywhere near as impressive as Hakkai and Gojyo's flowers.
The peonies caught Goku's attention the most. They were a vivid purple, and Goku wondered if Sanzo might take to some brightening up his desk (maybe they'd fare better than the fern had?) and if their scent would be strong enough to cover the smell of cigarettes.
"Ah!" the flower lady said brightly. "Those are lovely, aren't they?" She put down the orchids and gathered some peonies. "And I have these handy packs of floral preservative to help the bloom keep."
Goku scrunched up one side of his face. "Help it keep what?"
The lady laughed. "Just help them live a bit longer, make your girl think fondly of you for a few extra days," she said with a wink.
A few extra days? What did she mean by that? Goku was about to ask when he suddenly remembered a little bit of what he'd read in that book, and maybe even a little of some lesson Hakkai had taught him. Something about perennials and seasonals and--
"Hey! What about the peonies?"
But Goku was already long gone.
*****
Goku dragged Sanzo all the way to Hakkai and Gojyo's with a combination of slight physical force, a bit more pleading, and a whole lot of sheer willpower. The sun was hot at this time of the afternoon but Goku couldn't quite feel sorry for Sanzo sweating in his heavy robes. Goku didn't see why he had to wear them all the time, anyway. But yeah, it was hot, and even Goku was pretty damp by the time they arrived at the garden.
Gojyo and Hakkai met them outside, obviously alerted to their arrival by Sanzo's colorful vocabulary.
"What a pleasant surprise," Hakkai said.
"For who?" Gojyo asked, pointedly looking at Sanzo.
"Fuck off," Sanzo answered, pulling out his pack of cigarettes.
"Shhhhh!" Goku said. "Watch what you're sayin' in front of--in front of the--well, in front of the children."
Goku looked over at Hakkai and Gojyo's progeny and held his breath. They were as beautiful as the last time he'd seen them. A little taller, maybe, and some had lost leaves, as evidenced by those littering the ground around the stalks.
"Hakkai?" Goku didn't know exactly what he was asking as he bent down and picked up several leaves, revealing a fallen red petal hidden underneath. He still had no clue how Gojyo and Hakkai could manage becoming parents. He didn't know if the how even mattered. What Goku did know was that if the idea of his friends' children withering back to the earth was wringing unwelcome tears from his own eyes, then he never wanted to feel what Hakkai and Gojyo must be going through. "Hakkai."
"Aw, kid," Gojyo said affectionately, and Goku felt a warm hand on his shoulder. But it wasn't Gojyo's
Goku looked up at Sanzo. An unlit cigarette hung from between his lips and sweat still clung to his face, but he didn't look unwilling or pissed-off anymore, not even close, which is what finally brought Goku's tears to the surface.
"Always a soft touch," Sanzo said, but without an ounce of rebuke. "Yeah, they're going to die. Like everything that lives, they'll die."
Somehow, Sanzo's words were anything but comforting to Goku.
"But if those two idiots over there--" Sanzo indicated Hakkai and Gojyo with a nod.
"Hey!"
"Shut up, kappa! Goku." Sanzo's voice softened. "If those ugly fuckers can reproduce, don't you think something not half-bad to look at could manage it as well?"
Goku scrubbed the tears from his face with his sleeve and looked over at Hakkai and Gojyo.
"Bastard priest's right, Goku," Gojyo said. "As much as I hate to admit it."
Hakkai wrapped his arms around Gojyo's waist and hid his laughter in Gojyo's shoulder.
Goku turned his attention back to the flowers, letting Sanzo's hand fall away as he walked right into the center of the garden, carefully trying to step on as few fallen leaves and petals as possible even though he couldn't avoid them all. He stopped, closed his eyes, and breathed in as much of the heady scent as he could, wondering--since the flowers had Gojyo's wild coloring, did they have Hakkai's more grounded disposition? Goku hoped so, because maybe that particular combination would see their seeds planted not only far and wide, but a little bit closer to home, closer to their parents, closer to family.
Goku wasn't sure if he'd ever be able to bring himself to buy peonies for Sanzo's desk--or any other flower, for that matter--but that was okay. He could always drag Sanzo back here, to Hakkai and Gojyo's, to this garden where more than just flowers would continue to grow, long after the last seed took to the wind.
end