Chapter Text
Chapter One
It still felt unreal to Angel. How had he found the strength to do it? During the last Exorcist angel raid, Valentino had beaten and raped Angel so viciously, something had snapped in him. Angel had gone on the attack. Valentino had slapped the red chains on but Angel fought hard enough to grab Val and jump off the balcony. The angels had gotten Val. Angel had gotten lucky. He sneaked back into the Vee Tower and safety and hid out in Vox’s underground garage until the Exorcists fucked off back to heaven.
He didn’t have a plan. Once, not so long ago, the princess of hell had invited him to her hotel to work on redemption. Right about now having the protection of Lucifer’s daughter sounded good. If he got even luckier, Vox and Velvette would think he died alongside Valentino. But he did the dumb thing and proved himself alive. He just couldn’t leave Fat Nuggets behind, so he sneaked back into Val’s rooms, robbed him blind of drugs and money, grabbed his clothing, and then had selected one of Vox’s sportscars. Val had favored limos but Vox loved driving in his fancy autos. One of the first crimes Angel had learned from his big brother was auto theft. He hotwired Vox’s ugliest car – hoping it wouldn’t be missed or they’d think any chump had taken it and he drove it like he stole it because well, duh.
On his way to the hotel, Angel made a little detour, don’t ask him why. He’d been shackled to Val and Vee Tower for decades. He wanted to explore a little. That’s when he got lost in a major way, ending up a district of Pentagram City he had never heard of, merely called Lost according to the road sign. He was probably in the Doomsday district. Val never stepped a mothy toe there so neither had Angel. Lost was a good name for a collection of sinners in his opinion.
Lost had a weird almost Christmas village vibe about it, a lot like Cannibal Town. Velvette had called Cannibal Town the Hallmark Romance aesthetic and she hated it. He’d been surprised to learn that some greeting card company was now the major producer of romance movies. He parked in front of a place calling itself Ghostly Grinds and smelled of coffee. Might be the Italian in him, but he needed his espresso fix.
Feeling eyes on him, Angel whipped around, hoping Vox hadn’t been following him on CCTV this whole time. Standing one store away from Ghostly Grinds was a man in all red with a cane that looked like an old radio mike. His hair was reddish too and did he have deer ears or did he just have questionable tastes in hair styles? When the man in red noticed him staring, his eerie grin broadened and he disappeared into the shadows, like literally melted into them. It gave Angel gooseflesh which fluffed up all his fuzz. He probably looked like a fucking marshmallow. Gritting his teeth, he stepped into the coffee shop and nearly plowed into a freaking egg on legs.
Angel stared. It had been since forever the last time he’d seen one of Sir Pentious’ egg bois. Sure enough, Pentious was behind the counter fiddling with the espresso machine. He had always loved his machines. A girl with a teapot for a head – Lucifer, what the fuck did you have to do in life to end up like that? – waited on the short line. Angel bustled over to the counter, trying to get Sir Pentious’ attention but failed. He was too head deep in whatever he was doing.
When it was his turn, Angel pointed to the machine. “Tell me Sir Blowhard hasn’t screwed up the espresso machine because I could make someone double dead for a cappuccino.”
She laughed, some of the sound whistling out of her spout. “No, he’s trying to turbo charge it. I can make you a cappuccino.”
“One large enough to sail a boat on it,” he said and looked around at the pastries. Nothing resembled a cornetto but there was a cantucci. He called it a biscotti for her sake.
“Have a seat. Frank will bring it out to you.”
“Thanks.”
He stopped closer to where Pentious was working. “Hey, mad scientist.”
That brought Pentious out from inside his own head. “I’m an inventor and shop owner, not a mad scientist. That was Baxter!” He whipped around and glared at Angel. “Oh, it’s one of the whores. What do you want?”
“It’s been a while since I kicked your ass, thought I’d say hi. Did you give up on being an overlord and take a job in a coffee house?” Angel laughed.
“I didn’t give up only…I ended up in Lost.”
“So?”
“So you can’t leave Lost, not unless the Shadowman says so.” Pentious’ hood sagged. “He hasn’t seen fit to let me go.”
“You’re so full of crap.”
“Trust me. I’d love to see the back of you, spider. Go ahead, try to leave.” Pentious flickered his tongue at him. “Better find a street corner to make your own. You’re going to be here a while.”
“You’re such a gullible chump.”
Sir Pentious shrugged and went back to work. Angel ignored him and enjoyed his cappuccino when Frank brought it. He’d probably have to find a hotel such as they were in hell - more like death traps - and lie low for a while. He should have let them think he had died and not cleaned out all of Valentino’s money, drugs and hockable things before he had hidden in the garage. It wouldn’t help convince Vox he died in the attack but he hadn’t wanted to find a street corner to sell himself on straight off. He had more than enough cocaine to last him a while. They would have eventually noticed Fat Nuggets was gone, unless Vox thought Valentino had finally fed Angel’s baby to Shok.Wav like he had so often threatened to do.
The cappuccino wasn’t bad. He’d be back for more – and to annoy the fuck out of the slippery snake – if he stayed in town for a few days. It wouldn’t hurt to get his bearings before making his way to the princess’ hotel. When he went back outside, Angel looked around and noticed something. There wasn’t a single Voxtek camera anywhere on the streets nor anyone else’s brand either. This piece of hell really did have that old downtown feel. He’d like it here for the short term. He’d probably get bored soon.
Angel got back in his stolen car and brought out his phone just to see if Vox or Velvette had tried to contact him or level death threats at him. It had no service. Huh? He didn’t like the looks of that. He didn’t know hell had dead zones but if he thought about it, the only reason it didn’t was Vox’s narcissism. The dude wanted to be the best and that meant getting his coverage everywhere.
“Must have forgot about Lost,” Angel muttered, turning the car’s engine over. “Okay for shits and giggles, let’s see what Penny was on about.”
He drove for the city limits. The road curved and he was heading right back into town. It took six more tries before he gave up, jaw dropped.
“What the fuck? I really can’t leave?”