Chapter Text
Apophenia.
There was something wrong with nagito komaeda , maybe it was the way the spark in his eyes looked like a burnt star, distant, faded and impossible to bring back. or maybe it was the way his words occasionally blurred together during casual conversations, slurred enough make people pause before moving on.
Throwing him under the bus.
Forgetting about him.
Leaving him to face his own emotions in his head..
The signs were all there.
Hajime missed every single one of them.
And god did he wish he wasnt as oblivious.
***
Nagito faced the mirror of his room, his eye bags looking like they’re rotting on his face, dark and a deep shade of purple, pronounced enough to resemble bruises carved into his skin. Nagito hadn’t remembered the last time he saw his pale face without them, like exhaustion had settled in him and refused to leave with no matter how much sleep he got, it would be a constant reminder of what he had destroyed of himself. Even when he smiled, expression appeared incomplete. It lingered only upon his lips, never reaching the corners of his eyes no matter how diligently he attempted to force it there.
He didn’t bother hiding it any more.
The was little point in doing so.
If someone had happen to notice the white haired boy would simply laugh it off and dismiss their concern with a fragile excuse, he had become remarkably good at mastering that skill over the years.
Others believed him
Others stoped asking
But still..
He’d be forgotten.
Once again.
***
With a quiet sigh, nagito moved away from the mirror, having a final glance back, he reached for his doorknob and swung the door open.
The morning air stung with a gentle breeze as he stepped outside, sunlight spilled across the island, bright, vibrant and warm in a way that almost felt mocking. It was another beautiful day in jaberwock island..
Another,..
Beautiful,..
Day,..
…
The walk to the hotel from his cottage was uneventful, waves lapped against the shore in the far distance. The island already filled with life, a few of his classmates could be seen wandering about, perhaps also to the hotel or maybe down by the beach.. he wasn’t really paying attention at this point.
Nagito forced his polite smile that looked more like a lopsided grin.
None of them seemed to realise how forced it was.
They never did.
By the time nagito had arrived at the restaurant most of the others had already gathered, people grabbing food, pouring drinks and chatting idly.
He couldn’t really make out what was happening.
Perhaps it was kazuichi complaining over how he still couldn’t repair the aeroplane in the airport. Or maybe it was akane desperately grabbing more food and shoving it in her mouth. It was all too much for nagito to comprehend. It was all the same. Every day.
“Good morning nagito.” A voice broke the silent barrier between him and the world.
Hajimes voice pulled him from his thoughts.
Nagito glanced up at him as he grabbed his plate.
“Ah hajime! Good morning.”
He flashed that same smile..
Fake.
Again.
And again…
And again.
Nagito poked at his pancakes, drowning out the distant, irrelevant conversations around him, he covered them in syrup and cut them up into tiny bite-sized pieces, he just stared at them, taking a sip of his water, kicking his legs against the leg of the table and ajusting the pillow on the hard wooden chairs.
“You’re not eating?”
He jumped slightly
Hajime again, his voice echoed through his mind, circling until he got dizzy just thinking of his voice
“Oh. I’m not very hungry.” He replied back, putting on his mischievous grin
Hajime looked at him with more confusion
“You should probably eat that..?”
“I’ll survive, it’s not as if skipping breakfast would kill me” the white haired boy forced a chuckle that sounded so genuine even he was taken back in shock.
Maybe that was his cue to leave
“Hey hajime?”
The brown haired boy perked his head up as nagito stood up.
From his chair, dusting nothing off his knees.
“Yeah?”
“Do you ever wonder how long someone could disappear for before people started looking for them?”
Hajime stared at him blankly
“What kind of question is that!?”
“Just curiosity..”
“You’re weird.”
Nagito just laughed.