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He wanted to believe that Wade just didn’t like other people initiating touch. Logan himself had a bit of a hang up about it, and just because Wade was touchy feely with every living creature didn’t mean he liked it when it wasn’t on his terms.
He could’ve almost convinced himself of it too if, after a few days of meticulously keeping his hands to himself, of making sure not to invade Wade’s space or accidentally touch him, Peter hadn’t stopped by and casually shattered that hypothesis (and his heart) into smithereens.
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Logan makes an observation without taking all the variables into consideration and, of course, comes to the wrong conclusion.4 times Wade flinches when Logan touches him +1 time he doesn't.
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hot sauce by obihoebikenobi
Fandoms: Deadpool - All Media Types, Deadpool (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types, X-Men (Movieverse)
02 Nov 2025
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“Commitment can be attractive, so I’ve heard,” Logan responded, reminded of the times where he’d observed from the sidelines as Scott and Jean curled up on the sofa, wrapped together like they were trying to melt into a single form.
“Couldn’t agree more, pumpkin. Commitment goes hard as fuck,” Wade snorted, tapping his fingers across the metal poles of the balcony.
Huh?
Logan hadn’t exactly been expecting to hear that.
It didn’t matter if Wade constantly referred to Logan as his loving wife, or kicked Mary Puppins out of their so-called marriage bed, Logan hadn’t really considered those off-handed comments would have a little bit of truth in them. He’d assumed they were jokes, but if Logan was hearing him right, Wade seemed to like the idea of getting hitched.
Wade was talking about marriage.
And Logan was listening with a knot in the middle of his chest, because he wasn’t hating the idea of it. Not at all.
(Let's just say, it’s very poolverine-like to hate-fuck in a Honda Odyssey on the night they were supposed to get engaged.)
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glued at the fingertips by obihoebikenobi
Fandoms: Deadpool - All Media Types, Deadpool (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types, X-Men (Movieverse)
17 Feb 2026
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“Hey fucker–unfriendly reminder that you’re in my seat,” Wade leaned in to whisper the words directly in Logan’s ear, hot breath and all, “Go grab the cuck chair in Al’s room if you wanna join us for movie night this time.”
Logan grimaced, flicking his eyes toward Wade, fingers shifting where they were still wrapped around the neck of his soda bottle.
“Nope.”
Well that’s. Fuck. Wade was all sorts of fucked. He was fucked in ways he’d never been fucked before.
“Pretty please with a ‘i will fucking carve your balls out of their sack later’ on top?”
Logan didn’t even recoil at the suggestion, like he thought Wade was bluffing. Wade bluffed often and generously, but he never bluffed when it came to balls, and Logan knew as much.
“Seriously, Peanut, don’t make me get even more creative with my ball torture methods.”
(Wade's been putting off telling his friends that he and Logan are official. Logan forces the matter by stealing Wade's seat. And later, Wade becomes Logan's seat.)
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lowercase letters by obihoebikenobi
Fandoms: Deadpool (Movieverse), Deadpool - All Media Types, X-Men - All Media Types, X-Men (Movieverse)
16 Mar 2026
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“Would you mind getting… a little lower?” Wade said, quiet, voice void of any trace of inauthenticity.
Logan’s heart beat faster in his ribcage. He hoped Wade couldn’t feel it.
“By lower you mean…?”
Logan didn’t want to assume, didn’t want to seem too eager to get his hands on Wade in ways that he shouldn’t.
Wade reached down with one hand and tugged at the corner of the towel, not pulling it off.
So he did mean his ass then. Alright. Fuck.
Logan could do this. It was just a massage. An ass massage. That was completely normal and fine and not weird at all.
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“Okay!” he said, voice cheery. “What I want to say is, that makes me feel worse. I’m glad I saved you, Wolvie, really. But… you don’t owe me anything. You know that, right? I-I don’t want to have somehow Marvel Jesus style timeline stockholmed you into being with me. That’d be so not awesome sauce.” Wade laughed wetly, masking his choked out sob with a laugh.
“Awful sauce, even. Like- the worst expired sauce, at the back of our fridge with Al’s DIY moldy cheese. God, we really have to throw that out.” He furiously scrubbed at his watering eyes. “Fuck, this is embarrassing.”