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“$100 says he’s not taking a girl home tonight,” Eddie wagers.
All four of them look at him with stunned looks on their faces, as if they can’t possibly believe Eddie is being so stupid. Eddie shrugs, holds his arms out in a take it or leave it kind of gesture. Of course, they all think he’s insane, so -
“Deal,” Athena says.
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To tie up the loose ends of a hunt, Dean is forced to go undercover and visit Brock Pleasure Ranch, a horrifying establishment that markets its inhabitants to people with ‘monstrous’ tastes.
It should have been a simple thing, to persuade a mer to give him a few scales for a spell. All part of the usual Winchester byline: saving people, hunting things.
But Castiel is far less of a ‘thing’ than Dean expected. He might not be human, but he’s definitely a person.
And that means he needs saving, too.
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Sam's been through a lot lately, what with tonight's hunt rendering his skin an aching shade of purple and all. He can deal with Dean being overly concerned about Cas' broken finger, and - God help him - he puts up with the sound of their preposterously soppy love confessions and first kisses on the adjacent bed. But he cannot be expected to remain silent and feign sleep throughout the entire duration of their first-ever lovemaking session. He just can't. Especially not, because it seems apparent that Cas is more intent on deflowering himself than letting Dean do it.
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Angel general Castiel Novak is captured one night by demons from King Crowley's kingdom. He is transported overnight to an arena, where he is given a cell, a chance, and a partner.
His cell, he can handle. The chance to survive, he will take. His partner. . . Not so much.
Dean Winchester, Knight of Hell, wants nothing to do with Castiel either. But they have both been thrown here by circumstance, and there is only one way out of this arena: to eliminate all the other competition.
As time passes and the chances of never returning home climb higher, the boys start to realize that their only chances of survival rest in each other. Can a scarred demon learn to trust in guardian angels? And can a well-meaning angel finally help put a broken demon back together again?
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Former CIA agent Dean Winchester had earned a quiet retirement. Problem was, retirement was lonelier than he’d expected.
Things take a turn when retired SVR agent Castiel Novak suddenly drops into his sedate life, letting him know that all may not be as it seems.
Or
The one where Dean finds out he’s got a guardian angel.
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Castiel, freshly fired from his job, is moving to a perfectly ordinary house in a perfectly ordinary forest where he just happens to meet a perfectly ordinary guy called Dean. Sure, the house seems to be a little filled with monsters. Yes, the forest shrieks and whines at night. And without doubt, Dean saving Castiel's life is a strange kind of first date. But it's all perfectly ordinary - right?
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Castiel is unsure how to change Dean Winchester's feelings towards him. The Internet seems an obvious choice to look for answers. However, when Castiel comes across the concept of fanfiction, and learns that the heroes are frequently depicted falling in love with Mary Sues, all seems clear. Dean is a hero. Therefore, Castiel must attempt to imitate a Mary Sue. Destiel.
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Castiel Novak is a poor kid from a bad neighbourhood. Dean Winchester is a rich jock who maybe cares a bit more about Cas than he's willing to admit. You know how it goes.
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The teacher assigns a buddy to all the children in her first-grade class. Everyone writes their buddy a postcard, giving them a compliment. Dean is supposed to write something for Castiel, the mysterious autistic kid in the corner – but he doesn't hand anything in. Does he have nothing to say? Or does he have too much to say?
p.S. will you Be my Boyfrend ?
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A 26-year-old Dean is transported to 2021 and confronted with the unfathomable - a future where he is happy, safe, and loved.
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“Aren’t you gunna say it?” he asks tentatively, as if he’s crazy for picking up on the obvious.
“Yeah, you’re me. Past me, anyway,” the other Dean replies. “I wanna know from when.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Time travel,” the older Dean states as if it’s so obvious and ordinary. “It happens.”
“To who? Marty McFly?”
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where nothing bleeds by interstellarisms
Fandoms: Iron Lung (2026), Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
10 Apr 2026
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Simon didn’t expect his savior to be exactly his type.
What a welcome sight. Even if this stupidly handsome man ends up being evil, or working for the C.O.I, at least he’d die looking at something good.
or
Grace and Rocky find Simon's ship floating in deep space on their way to Erid.
UPDATE: This fic has been peer reviewed by a NASA engineer who has approved of the science!
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Notorious con artist Jonathan Carnahan, battered and broke from his latest scam, is offered a last chance deal by the Egyptian and British governments. In exchange for discharging all his debts, forgetting his many crimes, and assuring him his dear sister might continue to work between her two dearest nations, he must do the Establishment a favour.
Their own particular thorn in their sides are the secretive, desert-dwelling, irritatingly powerful Twelve Tribes of the Medjai, who have demanded a bridegroom for their stoic Medjai chief Ardeth Bay. Jonathan supposes he will just have to obediently ride a blasted camel out into the desert and put up with some hanky panky for a bit, then run away with an interesting relic as a souvenir - but Ardeth's unexpected gentleness and fierce protectiveness unravel all his plans.
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Falling Rocks and Falling Hearts (or some such silly notion) by HibernatingHermit
Fandoms: The Mummy (Movies 1999-2008), The Mummy (1999)
12 Sep 2023
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Jonathan has joined Evy and Rick on their latest dig in Egypt...but not for the educational aspect. Or the thrill of being bored to death by Evy's dreadfully droll new colleague, Willoughby.
No, Jonathan is there so that hopefully, maybe, he will run into a certain tall, dark, and mysterious man again...
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Thoroughly Blindsided by Hazel_Athena
Fandoms: The Mummy (1999), The Mummy Returns (2001)
14 Apr 2021
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Jonathan spends no small amount of time thoroughly panicking in the en-suite bathroom.
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Putting a ten year old Craig Tucker to bed is not easy. It’s even harder when all the kid wants to do is talk about his future plans with his boyfriend.
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The Curse of the Deserted Heart: A Tantalising Tale of Love and Adventure Amidst the Dunes of the Lost City That Will Thrill, Chill and Delight You! by kyaticlikestea
Fandoms: The Mummy Series, The Mummy (1999), The Mummy (Movies 1999-2008)
20 Apr 2023
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“Jonathan,” says Evy, walking straight into his living room without so much as a hello and standing directly in front of him. Her voice is saccharine, so sugary that it puts Jonathan’s teeth on edge. “Did you happen to become a bestselling author while Rick and I were in Luxor over summer?”
Jonathan clears his throat, sinks a little lower in his armchair, and lifts yesterday’s edition of The Egyptian Gazette higher, obscuring the blush he knows he can’t control.
“I have no idea how I’m supposed to answer that, dear sister,” he replies, “seeing as I have absolutely no idea what the current bestselling novels are.”
When Jonathan writes an adventure—definitely not a romance, thank you—novel based on the whole Imhotep debacle, he doesn't expect it to become the bestselling pulp sensation of the decade. With hindsight, perhaps he should have made some of the real life parallels less obvious, especially when it comes to the dashing romantic lead, Abir Rey.
Thankfully, there are no bookshops in the desert, so the chances of Ardeth reading it are blessedly slim.
Probably.
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KINKTOBER 2025 - DAY 31: WRITER'S CHOICE (HALLOWEEN COSTUMES)
Cartman might be a gigantic gaping asshole at the best of times but he knows how to throw a Halloween party.
There is, however, a catch. In the month leading up to the event, Cartman bets against benign things with people vying for their place among those invited to participate in the costume competition. This year, he’d doubled down on the bets, going harder than ever and offering increasingly outrageous costumes as he went on. For once, Kyle had actually not fallen foul to his bet.
No, this year, it was Stan who came out on the bottom.
Cartman tricks Stan into a compromising Halloween costume and Kyle takes advantage of the switch up. Butters and Kenny provide moral and *ahem* physical support.
Series
- Part 26 of Kinktober 2025
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Kenny really hates being put in this position. Because he’s starting to ignore the logical side of his brain and beginning to give in to the part that wants what it wants. Which is to grab Butters’ hand that’s lightly resting against his stomach and hold it and push back against him, eliminating any little bit of space that is left between them.
He wants that so bad it’s not funny.
God, does he want it.
Fuck.
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Everyone knew that Kenny McCormick was the poorest kid in town. They could crack jokes about it all they wanted, he really didn’t care, but most of them had no idea what really went on behind closed doors. They were all able to live semi-normal lives while Kenny had to work for every little thing he had and to help support his little sister however he could. It was exhausting and he was getting really fucking sick of it.
While Butters’ family may not be poor, that didn’t mean that life at home was all fine and dandy for him either. It was like constantly walking on eggshells, being hyper vigilant about every move he made and every word that came out of his mouth. He hated it, but what could he do? Honestly, he could only keep doing his best to stay on his parent’s good side and do what he was told. Anything to avoid negative consequences.
Neither of them knew what they were doing except whatever they could in order to survive in a world that only ever seemed to be against them. Maybe it was possible that they could eventually learn to survive together.
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Something was wrong.
Butters couldn’t tell at first exactly what was wrong, but he felt it, sitting sour in the pit of his stomach and rising up like bitter bile at the back of his throat.
