Ishouldbedoingworkrn



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    A Disclaimer From Your Friendly Neighborhood Oracle:

    The following is a transcript of Patrol Communications Audio written by state of the art transcription technology, IRIS (Interpretation of Recorded Intelligence Software). IRIS was created to provide easily searchable records, automatically, and eliminate the need to transcribe each patrol audio log manually. That being said, IRIS is still experimental, and may not always be entirely accurate.
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    (01:25) Red Hood: (Mild static) (Out of breath, slurred) You motherfuckers. Put some fuckin-

    Batman: (Shaking) Red Hood-

    Red Hood: Shut up. Put some fucking respect. On my name. Start fucking copying me. I just got thrown fucking. Um. 40 feet. Into a fucking uh. What's it. Ditch. I'm still fucking conscious.

    Batman: Red Hood, do not move, we're en route-

    Red Hood: What'll I win if I stand up.

    Batman: (Loud) Do not stand up.

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    17 Jun 2026

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    Ilya doesn’t seem to go out much, aside from the few times Shane sees him leave and return dragging two armfuls of groceries. He slips out onto the fire escape several times a day, every day, to chainsmoke and look miserable. It’s only natural, given the sheer amount of time he spends out there, that Shane would cross paths with him while using his own patio.

    Shane has a four year plan to captain his college hockey team and join the MLH, but none of that will happen if he gets lung cancer from all the cigarette smoke his smartass new neighbor produces, or if he keeps wasting his time meeting him on the fire escape.

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    03 Jun 2026

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    Shane can’t stand his college roommate and teammate, Ilya Rozanov. Can’t stand his arrogance and his messiness and his constant sleeping around.

    But then the entire team, Shane included, welcomes their families to campus for Parents Weekend.

    And Shane also can’t stand that Ilya is alone.

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    13 May 2026

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    "I'll see you here on Monday at six o'clock for the four to six year old class."

    "I don’t like kids,” Jason lied.

    Art rolled his eyes. “You are a kid. You’ll do it or you’ll find a different job.”

    Jason left the gym, and then, on Monday, he showed up at five-thirty and taught the goddamn class.

     

    --
    after a batarang to the throat, Jason goes to New York. all he wants is to disappear.

    he doesn't mean to, but he starts to give a shit. about the boxing gym he works at. about the old fart that runs it. about the kids he teaches.

    and that's before he meets the vigilantes.

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    13 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    omgomg

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    “So what have you been up to this weekend?”
    “Family picnic,” Peter says.
    “Oh, great, great fun,” Tony says and swipes away from the article about Spider-Man wrestling a giant spider on the roof of the Chrysler building.
    It’s quite obvious that Tony knows he is Spider-Man, but decided not to acknowledge it; decided to keep the secret going. For what reason, Peter doesn’t know. Maybe Tony thinks he can use the information in his favor, or maybe he just doesn’t want Peter to freak out. Either way, it serves Peter just fine, because Tony tries so hard to keep up his oblivious act that he never prods too hard or looks too deep.
    Which means all of Peter’s far bigger secrets are still safe.

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    28 Oct 2025