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1-800-hot-n-fun by persimmonsandcats
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime)
22 Mar 2025
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Summary
“I’m just saying,” Satoru says, like what he’s just said didn’t completely open Suguru’s skull and smash his brain like berries, “now please, sir, might I smoke some of your marijuana.”
“No.” Suguru says automatically, moving his vape away from Satoru’s searching hands. “Also stop fucking talking like that.”
“My man, let me hit that.” Satoru tries, reaching for the pen and tumbling forward. He’s off balance because he’s been drinking– barely but still– which is why he’s not allowed to hit Suguru’s vape. He lands solidly on Suguru’s chest, laughs, and then tilts his face up toward Suguru with a pout. “Suguru,” he whines.
“You’re a menace.” Suguru tells Satoru, pinching his cheek. “Especially when your dumbass is cross faded. Last time you spent three hours crying on my bed because you thought the world was spinning wrong and you were worried about marine life and coastal ecological impacts via the Coriolis effect.”
“Whale fall.” Satoru says suddenly, sounding mournful, and then he puts his head back on Suguru’s chest and bursts into tears.
Suguru pats Satoru’s head soothingly. He does feel vaguely frantic that Satoru is crying, but–
“You would subscribe to my OnlyFans?” He asks.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 37,854
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 167
- Kudos:
- 3,143
- Bookmarks:
- 1,085
- Hits:
- 75,183
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
18 Jun 2026
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Summary
For weeks he’s been nauseous, dizzy, unable to sleep but exhausted. Unwell in ways he couldn’t quite ignore. He’d thought he was getting sick, or maybe his life was catching up to him, all the things he’s been exposed to, the toxic air, the rot of the river, but then his chest had started to ache.
Silco finds himself in a predicament just when everything is about to change.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 180,200
- Chapters:
- 16/?
- Comments:
- 1,632
- Kudos:
- 3,119
- Bookmarks:
- 549
- Hits:
- 87,430
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
19 Dec 2024
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Summary
jimin discloses that he's never had a Valentine's Day date. Taehyung offers to be his this year.
It goes as well as you can imagine...
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
14 Feb 2023
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Summary
Namjoon (a famous producer) and Jungkook (Korea's #1 idol) used to date. After they broke up, they never talked shit on the internet, never told anyone anything bad.
Until they did.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,107
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 293
- Kudos:
- 1,238
- Bookmarks:
- 309
- Hits:
- 12,017
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
11 Sep 2022
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Public Bookmark 267
Mystery Work
Part of RMPrivate
Summary
This is part of an ongoing challenge and will be revealed soon!
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
05 Jul 2022
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Summary
An aspiring art collector hires you to acquire pieces on his behalf. The catch is, he wants to remain anonymous. You’ve never taken on an anonymous client before, but he promises a higher commission than normal – and you can’t help but be extremely intrigued. Now to puzzle out who he is…
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 80,642
- Chapters:
- 17/17
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 495
- Kudos:
- 1,414
- Bookmarks:
- 322
- Hits:
- 34,817
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
27 Jun 2022
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Summary
You didn’t just think Hoseok was cute.
You thought he was hot.
Unnervingly hot.
Mouth-drying, thighs-pressing-together, gut-punchingly hot.
Oh no, you wanted to bang Hoseok.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,688
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 27
- Kudos:
- 724
- Bookmarks:
- 103
- Hits:
- 6,817
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
27 Jun 2022
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Summary
As a knight of the Jedi Order, Taehyung has sworn an oath against personal attachments.
Ten years after Jimin ran away from the Order, he resurfaces as a Sith apprentice, and calls all of Taehyung's loyalties into question.
(Fear of loss is a path to the dark side, and Taehyung refuses to lose Jimin again.)
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
07 Mar 2022
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Summary
As you become close friends with BTS, you begin to realize that the feelings you have for them are slowly turning into something you're not ready to deal with. Unbeknownst to you, the same is happening to them.
Series
- Part 2 of Could We Be Together, Someday?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 75,771
- Chapters:
- 9/?
- Comments:
- 683
- Kudos:
- 1,986
- Bookmarks:
- 312
- Hits:
- 59,523
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
20 Feb 2022
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Summary
In which a fairy reluctantly dons the mantle of “prey,” a golden-haired prince leads a ritual hunt, and a November dawn chases away more than just the night’s shadows. There are many ways to die, and some of them, William discovers, are smaller—and luckier—than others.
[Medieval fairy tale AU]
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
26 Apr 2021
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Summary
When she accidentally sent Derek a sex confession, Stiles hadn't been expecting this kind of reaction.
Or: The One Where Derek Hale Offers His Services
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
23 Jul 2019
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Summary
Derek Hale, first-string quarterback for the U.C Berkeley football team is an All-American, red-blooded male, straight as an arrow. Well, at least, that’s what everyone around him believes. What they don't know is that he’s crushing hard on the school's Quidditch Club star player. When his coach forces him to recruit said Quidditch player, Derek’s life becomes a lot more complicated.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 66,370
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 486
- Kudos:
- 3,845
- Bookmarks:
- 1,085
- Hits:
- 71,875
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
08 Jun 2019
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Summary
Derek looks fucking outrageous as Stiles drinks him in, jaw is slack in pleasure, his big eyes now just slits of pupil, just open just enough to be able to see himself fucking in and out of Stiles’ abused hole, his normally perfectly sculpted hair matted to his forehead and Stiles is sure this is the best he’s ever looked. He watches in amazement at his abs contract and flex with every thrust, his hands find their way to his chest. He brushes a finger over his nipple and God, Derek’s eyes pretty much roll back into his head in pleasure, Stiles lets out a hazy giggle and pinches the little blush pink nub between his thumb and forefinger, rolling it gently.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,771
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 5
- Kudos:
- 289
- Bookmarks:
- 36
- Hits:
- 3,957
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
13 May 2019
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Summary
On a rural island just off Alaska’s northern Inside Passage, stands a centuries old lighthouse - the perfect sanctuary for its keeper to hide when the moon is full, to burn and rage through its cycle with the townsfolk being none the wiser.
But then a new resident comes to Beacon Harbour – a bright-eyed young student chasing an elusive whale species – and all of a sudden those thick stone walls seem paper thin…
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 75,073
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 863
- Kudos:
- 4,208
- Bookmarks:
- 1,383
- Hits:
- 94,618
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
10 Feb 2019
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Summary
“He didn’t magically charm me,” Derek shot back in his defense.
“Oh, so he just regular charmed you?” Laura said with a smirk.
“What? No,” Derek growled.
“Was he hot?”
“No! He just—“ He just had a laugh like a sun shower. Fuck.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 42,525
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 322
- Kudos:
- 6,695
- Bookmarks:
- 1,876
- Hits:
- 107,884
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
14 Jan 2019
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Summary
“We could do Despacito.”
Derek makes a face, and Stiles silently crosses the song off the list.
“Hit Me Baby One More Time?”
Derek rolls his eyes. “I swear to god, Stiles…”
Stiles crosses it off as well, then perks up. “Ooh! I know! What about that one song from Tangled, where they’re sitting in the boat in the lake, and all those lanterns are floating around them?”
“I’m not figure skating to Disney in the Olympics, Stiles.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 40,537
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 167
- Kudos:
- 1,068
- Bookmarks:
- 386
- Hits:
- 11,474
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
25 Sep 2018
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Summary
Today, the 22nd of June, would be the day that Stiles learned Truth or Dare was so much more innocent when they were children. His dare was as follows: He had to download an app called Sudy, and he had to reply to every message he received for a full week.
So he downloaded the app.
“What the hell is this,” he mumbled as he signed up, brows furrowing as he read the tagline. “Wait -- What am I signing up for?” He asked, looking up at Isaac who looked way more pleased than he should have.
“Oh, this is a dating app,” Isaac spoke, smirking in a way that Stiles knew there was a catch. There was always a catch. “For sugar daddies to meet their sugar babies.”
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Peter just wants to spoil Stiles.
Stiles just wants people to stop kidnapping him to get to Scott.
Turns out, Peter's the only one that gets what he wants.Bookmarked by JustALilBi
21 Sep 2018
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Summary
After a week of rehearsal, Stiles is convinced that there’s no way this production is going to end in anything other than misery.
Beacon Hills Classical Ballet Academy performs a variation of Swan Lake where all of the swans are males, forcing Stiles to partner up with Derek Hale. Things go about as well as one would expect.
Series
- Part 1 of BHCBA
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
14 Sep 2018
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Summary
“Do you love him?” Paige simply asked.
Derek turned to look at her. "That's a silly question," he simply replied, knowing that Paige was referring to Stiles.
“And yet it’s a question you won’t answer,” Paige replied.
Derek carefully observed Paige. “Why ask it?”
“Because he loves you.”
~*~
Or, the one where Stiles is the High Enchanter of King Hale's court, but at night is the lover that lines the sheets of Derek's bed. When Derek is forced to marry in pursuit of an heir, things begin to crumble.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 53,519
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Comments:
- 299
- Kudos:
- 2,825
- Bookmarks:
- 694
- Hits:
- 48,314
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
27 Aug 2018
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Summary
"Stiles, as always, rose to the challenge. He’s been one of the most consistent partners I have ever had, and I am so lucky to have been partnered with him. Not a lot of people would be able to stand up to the scrutiny and the judgement that he has, but he does it all with a smile and a laugh. He inspires me.”
There were other interviews now, from other contestants about Stiles and Derek and their online support phenomenon, but Stiles didn’t hear any of it. His attention was fully on Derek now, who was looking across the stage at him with what Stiles could only describe as a sense of pride. A small smile broke over Derek’s face, and he ducked his head in the adorable, slightly embarrassed way that Stiles just loved.
Derek, who started out this competition thinking he had a female partner, who instead was saddled with Stiles and, along with him, even more controversy and judgement than he should have had to handle. And yet he stood there, ready for their last performance, one that could literally make or break his career. If he could be that brave for Stiles, well then...Stiles would be brave, too.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,619
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 127
- Kudos:
- 528
- Bookmarks:
- 106
- Hits:
- 5,394
Bookmarked by JustALilBi
22 Jul 2018