NaughtyPastryChef



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Which of you morons,” she hisses, “let Eddie log into twitter today?”
    Eddie blinks.
    “How do you-”
    “Because, Eddie- you commented using the band account. You logged in on our official socials.”
    Eddie stares at her dumbly. Then-
    “Oh fuck.”
    “Yes,” she agrees. “Oh fuck.”
    “I’ll- delete that, then,” he laughs nervously. “Before-”
    “Before someone picks up on it, screenshots it, begins distributing it across the internet at a frankly alarming pace and starts a series of hashtags up in an effort to find the ‘pretty boy’ gardener you were lusting over?”

    ---

    Eddie is a burnt-out-overworked-crash-and-burn-rockstar with a crippling twitter addiction. Steve is a chronically-offline-homegrown-indiana-boy-flowershop-owner with a green thumb and a penchant for taking in strays.
    So naturally when Eddie first sees him, he's head over heels. And Steve has no clue what his day job is.
    He'll tell Steve about his 'real' identity before things go too far- right?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,425
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    255
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    1,821
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    05 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Eddie is suffering in the heat, and Steve's wardrobe choices feel like a cruel and unusual punishment.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,121
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    312
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    12 Dec 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Steve blurts, “I want your sperm.”

    The words echo off of the bathroom tile and Eddie is as still as a statue. Nobody moves. Steve feels the mortification rising swiftly like water in a well and he wishes that he could drown in it. It doesn't let him, gathering in his chest and his cheeks and making his entire being tremble with its scope and scale.

    Eddie’s quiet for probably ten solid seconds, his face utterly blank and impassive as he processes this statement.

    Then he shrugs and starts undoing his belt.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,389
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    223
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    08 Oct 2025

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Eddie works himself up to ask Steve if he can borrow his instant camera, because the type of pictures he wants to take are…not the kind he can get developed in town.

    Turns out, Steve's happy to help out. Even if the guy Eddie's taking sexy pictures for is not him.

    Or is it?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,542
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    318
    Kudos:
    2,204
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    455
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    20,948

    01 Oct 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    And just like that, Eddie pulls his boxers down just a smidge too low.

    Eddie wasn’t lying. The tattoo, a gorgeous, fantastical imagining of a dragon, stretches across the plane of his stomach all the way into his pubic hair.

    But that’s not what Steve’s looking at.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,563
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    165
    Kudos:
    4,021
    Bookmarks:
    571
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    29,407

    12 Jul 2025