Poptartsss
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Magic gets tedious when you’re dealing with it every day. Ed's the best witch around, but even in semi-retirement he can’t rest. There’s a whole village relying on him, potions to brew and enchantments to cast. His business is booming, sure, but if he’s really honest with himself— he just didn’t care. It felt devoid of a long-dissipated passion, just going through the motions each day.
It was all so… boring. Lonely, if he was honest about it.
Enter a new neighbor. A break in Ed's monotony. A chatty wizard who can't cast a decent spell to save his life with a penchant for smiling at Ed like he hung the moon.
Well. Color Ed intrigued.
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️💐Sequel to 'Can I Believe You?' // a love story told within a motorcycle AU 🏍️
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The road stretches on. As they fan a flame between them, the pair begins to realize the importance of the choices they make along the way.
Featuring the inane adventures of two lovers in: the horrors of restaurant management, romantic dates, personal growth, rowdy barfights, courtrooms, and two shiny rings.
Series
- Part 2 of Can I Believe You?
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Linus picks up a new hobby, which sounds simple enough. But as with most things in his eclectic, hectic, wonderful family, it quickly gets out of hand.
He really doesn’t mind, though.
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Ed’s to-do list for the day is completely scribbled out and just below there’s a remorseful doodle of a frowny-face and the barely-legible scrawl: Be sick and miss brunch.
aka: contractor au, sickfic editionSeries
- Part 2 of A House, A Home
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”Ed admires the most recent firework as it blazes in a flourishing cascade of violet light, the shimmering sparkles filling the night like sudden, fleeting stars. A joy that lasts mere seconds. A chaotic blaze of beauty, faded away too fast.
Slipping through his fingers.
Ed vehemently pushes the thought away, turning back to seek out the one thing that’s truly bringing him comfort tonight. Stede, bare and beautiful, gently draws the gossamer curtains shut. Their world gets that much smaller, encapsulated alone in this bunk. Not a single thing outside of this space needs to matter— all that does, is them. Finally together. Not wasting another second.”
*S2E6, the fade-to-black missing scene.
Recent series
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Professor Edward Teach has been fascinated by pirates since the time he was a child thanks to sharing his name with one of the most famous pirates in the world. He's specialized in them from their history in the distant past to the current iterations of piracy in the modern world. He's finally settled down in an illustrious university to teach his passion when one evening a new name pops up on the class roster.
Stede Bonnet.
It isn't the first time a vampire has been in his class, but it's the first time one of them has pretended to be a famous pirate from the Golden Age. The new student vampire seems to be insistent that Ed's got his facts muddled and is eager to correct him time and time again.
And worse, the man is damnably attractive, well spoken and interesting as fuck, even if he is carrying delusions about being the former Gentleman Pirate.
Series
- Part 3 of Our Flag Means Supernatural
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 109,922
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Collections:
- 1
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- 507
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Bookmarked by Poptartsss
17 Jun 2026
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come a little closer (and let me do those things to you) by ghostalservice for Kuuttamo
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
12 Sep 2024
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Ed asks Stede a question. It makes him stop and think.
(and then they fuck about it)
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,700
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 52
- Kudos:
- 341
- Bookmarks:
- 64
- Hits:
- 2,389
Bookmarked by Poptartsss
15 May 2026
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old gods and koroks by foxtails, mossgroves, self_induljennt
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
02 Apr 2025
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He ducks under the ridge of the skull, unclips his bow, slips an arrow into the housing, and creeps around until he has a decent view of the trail. The stranger has slowed, staring up at the leviathan as they approach, hands on their hips. Ed steps out into view, raises his bow, and pauses.
The stranger, as unknown as he currently is, is cute.
Hylian, most likely. A little shorter than Ed, but broad looking under his tunic and cloak, pack sticking up over the top of his head, and visibly stuffed with god-knows-what. There’s a physical map sticking out from one of his pockets, and leaves in his hair, and he’s clearly not been gifted with powers of observance, because Ed’s been aiming a bow at him for the best part of two minutes, and he still hasn’t noticed.
And then, all at once, his gaze drops, and his eyes widen, and he all but screams.
“I’M FRIENDLY!”
or: what if Ed and Stede just happened to be citizens in the Kingdom of Hyrule? And what if they had a serendipitous meet cute at the Great Eldin Skeleton and then fell in love? Suspend your disbelief, because this is that fic.
Bookmarked by Poptartsss
31 Mar 2026
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Ed jerks his head in the direction of the couch in the nearby waiting nook, and prepares himself for impending disaster.
The impending disaster follows. Eagerly.
“I’ve organized everything chronologically,” he says, setting the overstuffed briefcase down and thumbing through some of the piles. “But I can, of course, rearrange the presentation order based on your personal preferences! Alphabetically? Most-to-least amusing? Oh! Or a mystery draw - just pick a random folder without looking! That could be fun, couldn’t it?”
Somewhere, deep in Ed’s soul, a very tiny, very tired voice goes: there is something deeply wrong with you as a man, Ed. You’re into this. Don’t even try to fucking deny it.
(Or: Stede Bonnet is getting his first tattoo. Maybe. If Ed is able to rifle through Stede's entire briefcase of ideas and pro/con lists and flow charts and excel spreadsheets, and figure out what he actually wants. Which might take some time. A Reverse Big Bang 2025 fic with art by bbyteach!)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,010
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 359
- Kudos:
- 329
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- 66
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- 3,832
Bookmarked by Poptartsss
02 Oct 2025
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To Orbit the Sun of Your Soul by RainbowMoths, ThatJadeykinns
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
31 Oct 2024
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Kinktober Prompt day 31: "Praise Kink, Aftercare, "I've got you"" with the amazing Jadey who made stunning art
“Suppose we should,” Ed agreed, smirking against his skin that was flushing a pretty pink under his affections. “Great idea, actually, you’re full of those.”
“Wanna be full of you instead,” Stede snapped back in an impatient whine, going frigid as soon as he’d realized he’d said it out loud just as it came to mind.
“Fuck yes, that’s a good boy,” Ed’s grin was like a supernova, bright and enticing as he felt Stede’s breath leave his lungs in a quick woosh, his rigid body turning to putty beneath his calloused palms just as intended with the praise. “Oh, you’re gonna be so good for me, aren’t you.”
It was a statement rather than a question, and Stede couldn’t be bothered to teasingly correct him, all bratty attitude possibilities non-existent with the pulse of arousal that was sent down straight to his hips at Ed’s words, his tone just as ragged with want as Stede felt. He could barely manage a nod as he felt Ed’s teeth graze the now-sensitive skin at his neck, whining “Y-yes, please, Ed,”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,279
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 13
- Kudos:
- 79
- Bookmarks:
- 17
- Hits:
- 1,018
Bookmarked by Poptartsss
09 Sep 2025