SecretUndercoverAnonymous
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For Proper Thieves by SecretUndercoverAnonymous
Fandoms: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
08 Sep 2021
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“'Wait,' Matthias blurted, as she reached for the hem of her knitted vest. 'Wait.' He crossed the room and stood in front of her as she turned to face him - reaching out, he gently touched his fingers to her hands where they had paused above her waist. 'Let me help,' he said."
A missing moment from Crooked Kingdom, Chapter 16: Matthias helps Nina get changed for the Sweet Reef mission and Nina teaches Matthias more about kissing.
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A Risk Worth Taking by SecretUndercoverAnonymous
Fandoms: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
07 Sep 2021
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"Nina gently smiled and said, 'What about the whaling hut?'
'You slept very peacefully then also. I do not often get to see you so still.' Matthias gazed at her fondly before returning his attention to his fingers combing through her hair. Nina could tell there was more on his mind, so she waited; finally, he took a deep breath and said, 'It was simpler then in many ways.'"A missing moment from Crooked Kingdom Chapter 30: Matthias and Nina talk about fear in the suite at the Geldrenner.
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Into Dangers He Did Not Know by SecretUndercoverAnonymous
Fandoms: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
19 Aug 2021
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"'Let’s see,' she continued, 'neither of us are in chains, the ship is still afloat, and we’re not on our way to commit any unprecedented crimes, so I’d say this is our most successful ocean voyage so far.'
Nina expected a laugh, or, at the very least, a detailed list of the things she’d left out of the story, but Matthias only chuckled quietly and continued staring out at the horizon. She tilted her head up to look at him. He had a strange set to his face, Nina realized; he looked resigned to something, ready to fight."
On the way to Ravka after the events of Crooked Kingdom, Matthias prepares himself to face his past (and Nina reminds him that he's not on his own).
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Remember All You Have To Lose by SecretUndercoverAnonymous
Fandoms: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
04 Jul 2021
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"She pulled back from their embrace to look in Matthias’s eyes, placing her hands on either side of his face as if she could hold him there forever. 'I saw you die,' she breathed out, without fully thinking about it."
Nina has a bad dream on the way to Ravka.
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In the dark, I’m not scared. I just reach and you’re right there. by Gracesmk
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV)
30 Jun 2026
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Ilya is having one of those days where he can’t get out of bed and on top of that is missing his boyfriend so much he feels like he might die. Shane drives all the way to Ilya to comfort him.
Bookmarked by SecretUndercoverAnonymous
30 Jun 2026
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It does mean missing out on things like barbeques and team dinners sometimes, but it’s not as if he would have been able to participate anyway. At this point in his life, risking someone not taking his allergies seriously would mean potentially missing games, which makes it unacceptable. Jackie always makes sure he has a dish or two that’s safe when he’s over at their house, but if he was going to be the one guy sitting and drinking ginger ale instead of taking part in sharing nachos or Korean barbeque or burgers or any other delicious thing he goes in knowing he can’t have anyway, there’s no point in making a fuss about it. He eats at home, has a drink with everyone else, and he calls it a day. Easy. Safe. Foolproof.
But also the reason it doesn’t occur to him that he hasn’t actually told Ilya about any of his allergies until it becomes immediately relevant five days into being at his cottage together.
(how ilya learns about shane's food allergies) (and how shane learns what it's like to have someone who always saves him a seat at the table) (and who also makes sure there's food he can eat on the table to start with)
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Bookmarked by SecretUndercoverAnonymous
26 Jun 2026
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Shane should be here right now, should be in Ilya’s house. Ilya should be teasing him about being picky while going through delivery options for food on his phone. Shane should be discovering that Ilya has ginger ale in the fridge and the protein bars Shane mentioned liking in an interview in his pantry. He should be making out with Shane on the couch, sneaking a hand into his pants, teasing him about whether they can beat the deliveryman and arrive before he does. Shane was supposed to spend the night tonight, the Montreal team not set to leave until tomorrow afternoon because of potential bad weather in the morning. Shane should be fed and showered and ready to curl up in bed with Ilya tonight.
But Shane is in a hospital.And Ilya is here.
He pulls up Jane in his phone again. He presses call.
“Hey, you’ve reached Shane Hollander-”
Ilya closes his eyes and lets Shane’s voice roll over him.
(canon divergence in which shane getting injured happens during a game in boston) (...which means shane then gets to go home with ilya to recover)
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Bookmarked by SecretUndercoverAnonymous
25 Jun 2026
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He gnaws at the guilt of his own actions the way Anya does her chew toys for days after, Shane clearly picking up on something going on with him but also giving him space to work it over in his head until he’s ready to share.
Right up until they’re out at team dinner and the two other smokers at the table excuse themselves for a smoke outside and Shane looks to him expectantly-
-only to frown when Ilya stays where he is.
(how and why ilya finally gives up smoking)
Bookmarked by SecretUndercoverAnonymous
25 Jun 2026
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“I am sorry,” he says. “I am not trying to fight. I just don’t like the idea of you not being okay and me not knowing, even when I am in the same place as you.”
That Shane can understand. He wouldn’t like it if their positions were reversed, after all, if he thought Ilya was potentially in danger and he was in the next room over drinking champagne and making smalltalk. He sees Ilya go somewhere in his head sometimes, sees him retreat inwards, sees him check out even if his body is still there, going so deep inside that he doesn’t even catch Shane’s eye for a bit even when something funny happens, too far away for Shane to reach him.
But it’s also not like he can just go up and grab Ilya by the arm and pull him away from the party, not without inviting speculation and a whisper storm. He doesn’t have that right, doesn’t have that privilege, to potentially need Ilya or be needed by Ilya and be able to just pull him away.
It’s moments like these that Shane feels the weight of their secret like a physical thing.
(5 times shane and ilya couldn't be openly together and 1 time they could)
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Bookmarked by SecretUndercoverAnonymous
25 Jun 2026