Shalamarr
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Stede tried to raise a hand so that he could rub his sore forehead, but something was wrong. His hand refused to obey his command. He opened his eyes, carefully so that he could avoid being attacked further by the unforgiving sunlight, and …
“What the hell?”.
He was trussed up like a rotisserie chicken, lying in a pit several feet deep that had been dug in the sand.
“Who did this??”.
“That’d be me,” a cheerful voice said from somewhere above. “Morning, sleepyhead.”
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Consider this a re-imagining of Season Two. Not because I didn't enjoy the Season Two we got! I adored it and always will, but I just wanted to tell a different story. We'll have angst and danger and whump and the whole nine yards, but in the end, true love will prevail. You have my word on that.
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We all know how the "This is Happening" episode began, right?
- Ed told Stede that he was thinking about leaving the Revenge.
- Stede was frantically trying to think of a way to stop him when Roach interrupted to report that they'd run out of oranges. This was bad, because they needed oranges on account of the Swede's teeth falling out from scurvy.
- Stede set off with Lucius to get more oranges. Instead, he returned with a treasure map that he'd bought from some woman.
This story is about that woman. Who is she? Just a random con artist? Or, maybe, someone we happen to know pretty well?
Let's find out!
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“Please, Nanny!”.
“For the hundredth time, Master Stede, the answer is no.”
“I’m not asking you to pay for them! I can pay for them! I’ve still got my birthday money that my grandparents sent me!”.
“That’s not the point, Master Stede. If I were to help you buy those books, and your parents found out, I’d lose my job. You know what they think of such things.”
Stede knew, all right. He’d had his parents’ opinion of whimsical distractions like toys and art supplies and storybooks drummed into his head for most of his ten-year existence. But I have to have those books, he thought with desperate longing. I simply have to.
*****
At one point, Rhys said that he thought Stede’s favourite song would be “The Rainbow Connection”:
Have you been half asleep, and have you heard voices? I’ve heard them calling my name. Is this the sweet song that lures the young sailor? The voice might be one and the same.
This story tries to explore that yearning for more that I think Stede felt from an early age.
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“Ed, what on earth is the matter? Why are you going all judge, jury and executioner on me?”.
“Because of the way you’re acting!”. Ed didn’t mean to shout, but he was getting seriously upset. “I gather that she’s rich and upper crust, but you’re the richest and most upper crust bloke around, so why the fuck are you kissing her arse?”.
Stede reddened, and he gave Ed an incredulous glare. “How can you ask me that? Do you think I want to demean myself?”.
“I’d like to think not, and yet here we are, so why are you doing it?”.
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Uh-oh, is there trouble in Paradise? (Spoiler: no. At least, not for long.)
Anyone who's seen Project Hail Mary will know that Ryan Gosling wears a deliciously cuddly-looking sweater in it. The catch is that the sweater isn't available for purchase - the only way to get one is by buying the kit and knitting it yourself. Two years ago, I wrote a story called "A Stirring Yarn" in which Ed and Stede created a knitting company, and I thought "What the hell - I'll bring my two fandoms together."
Series
- Part 2 of A Stirring Yarn
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It began as a blind item in a gossipmonger website called Hush Hush.
Now hear this, haters and hangers-on.
Helen Hendricks, the site’s owner, always started her posts that way, and she always tried to incorporate as many “h” words in her posts as possible. She thought that doing so made her sound cool and quirky. The minions who worked for her had a different opinion, but they wisely kept it to themselves, having seen firsthand how their boss reacted when someone dared to disagree with her. (It wasn’t pretty.)
Which hunky hockey superstar was seen playing a different kind of hockey – the tonsil kind – with a taboo honey in a hidden alleyway outside a hopping hotspot in February?
Recent series
Recent bookmarks
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Closer to where you are (is where I must be) by sistercacao
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
19 Jun 2026
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“Ilya, what are we gonna do?” Shane says.
Ilya finishes whatever he has been doing on his phone, and tosses it gently to the bed beside him. He crosses the room to Shane, stands in front of him, squeezes into his shoulders with his big hands, rubbing them like he means to warm them up.
“Looks like we will have a little vacation,” he says, with a big obnoxious grin.
Boston and Montreal are sent to Paris to play against each other in an exhibition series in January 2017. Ilya and Shane decide to stay in Paris for one more night. Just one more night, so they can talk. Maybe finally understand each other.
They aren't expecting a volcano to erupt in Iceland and close all the airspace in Europe, leaving them stranded there. Together.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 127,267
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Comments:
- 4,143
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- 13,924
- Bookmarks:
- 6,092
- Hits:
- 426,243
Bookmarked by Shalamarr
29 Jun 2026
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Super Straight Broz (Live) by Stickyslut17
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
26 Jun 2026
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Ilya and Shane are broke roommates, until Ilya discovers streaming and starts making bank jerking off for the viewers
Naturally, he offers his good friend Shane a chance at making money the same way
And if they touch each other a little it’s only because of the tips, not because they are into each other~~~~~~
Shane and Ilya are both completely straight here
#ISwearrr- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,040
- Chapters:
- 4/6
- Comments:
- 234
- Kudos:
- 1,604
- Bookmarks:
- 634
- Hits:
- 26,819
Bookmarked by Shalamarr
29 Jun 2026
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Stede smiled and leaned against the edge of the train door. “I can’t tell you what’s going to happen in the future, Ed. My world has already changed so much, in just six weeks. Who’s to say it can’t keep changing? Maybe there’s trouble ahead. Or maybe this -” He looked back down at Ed, who was gazing up at him in open, unguarded wonder. “Maybe all of this will get easier for- for people like us. I don’t know. But I sure would like to find out together. Wouldn’t you?”
- The Reno Cure, Chapter 11
Series
- Part 4 of From Reno, With Love
Bookmarked by Shalamarr
29 Jun 2026
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When the Pirates of the Caribbean Breaks Down, the Pirates Don’t Eat the Tourists (or do they?) by veeagainst for offsammich
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
11 Jan 2026
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A Jurassic Park AU from an unexamined perspective
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,563
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 84
- Kudos:
- 91
- Bookmarks:
- 15
- Hits:
- 522
Bookmarked by Shalamarr
29 Jun 2026
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Summary
Rather than give him the joint, Ilya takes it back between his own lips and sucks in a deep breath, the tip glowing as he does so. Then, before Shane can process it, he’s reaching up and sliding one large hand around the back of Shane’s neck, pulling him down so their lips meet.
Shane gasps softly, and Ilya takes the opportunity to blow smoke into his open and waiting mouth.
Oh, God. Are you there? It’s me, Shane Hollander. We’ve had our differences, but I think I’d like to convert for real this time. I’m ready. Open the pearly white gates. I’m coming up.
Shane goes to a house party, gets high, then gets on his knees. bon appetite
now a multi-chapter saga bc i couldn't help myself- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 93,547
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Comments:
- 2,235
- Kudos:
- 18,506
- Bookmarks:
- 6,880
- Hits:
- 434,954
Bookmarked by Shalamarr
28 Jun 2026