Spindlewinder
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- Good Omens (TV) (2)
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Summary
Crowley is so, so tired. It's been six weeks since the day he returned to his palatial apartment from a relaxing stroll by the water, soaking up the Italian sunlight and the miasma of unkind thoughts around him. A free demon living his best existence without a care or an unwanted emotion in the world.
And there on his salmon-pink doorstep he'd found a puddle of a demon with a worried cloud of blowflies buzzing between their hat and the doorknob as if the swarm was trying to look through the keyhole.
'What,' Crowley had said, 'in the everloving fuck—'
'He – he – he broke up with me,’ Beelzebub had wailed.
Crowley has broken with Hell. Beelzebub and Gabriel have broken up. Crowley has had it with Beelzebub’s breakup era.
Supreme Archangel Aziraphale is consumed with his doubts about Heaven – and fears for those who remain below.
*Featuring a universe in peril, a surprise proposal, an unimpressed Vicar, confused hellhounds, curious angels, getting married without talking things out, a gift from God, kidnappings, escapes, and a good deal of being down bad.*
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Alesha crosses over to the bar and slips onto a barstool. 'Whoever she is, she's not worth it.'
A head tilts towards her. A tuft of crimson-dyed hair falls over his forehead to rest over the bridge of his sunglasses.
'What do you know about it. Yes he is.'
'If he was worth it, would you be here, with your head on the bar, all alone?'
'... an' another thing, a thing I'd never ever tell 'im is I love 'im when he's just a little bit bad, when he slips an' slides towards me … but really really do not tell anyone I told you this because I love 'im because 'e wantshh to be good.'
Crowley sucks in some air. Aziraphale is acting guilty. Every time Aziraphale has had a reason for guilt that Crowley himself hasn't been the cause of, it's always been the most interesting thing ever.
This is too wonderful to pass up. Crowley sets his glass down, and undulates over the coffee table until he's looming over the angel in his chair. He loops his hands over the high back of the chair on either side of the angel's shoulders, caging him in. He leans down until his nose is almost bumping Aziraphale's.
'What,' he says, 'did you do.'
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Summary
Everyone knows that the Supreme Archangel Aziraphale has broken with his demonic associate Crowley.
This does not explain why said associate is leaning against the wall at the top of the Holy Escalators, scowling at the angel on guard like she shouldn’t be there, and shoving a brown paper bag at her. A material brown paper bag.
“Make sure you dissolve the cocoa and sugar in cold milk before adding the hot milk. And don’t you dare scald the milk,” Crowley added, with a ferocity that suggested she was not only going to make the Supreme Archangel a human drink herself, she was going to scald it, whatever that meant.
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Crowley and Aziraphale are over. But that doesn't seem to stop Crowley turning up at the gates to Heaven with a scowl and a succession of gifts.