Sweet_Southern_Tea



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    Logically, Shane isn’t stupid, logically, part of his brain is frantically trying to pull him out of the shock. Of trying to rationalize what he is seeing. But it just doesn’t feel real. Not even as he’s watching the torso of someone still crawling along the pavement. Not until he watches one of the soldiers in the footage turn the gun around onto himself and–

    Rose screams.

    Shane sucks in a broken breath, the trance snapping free and one name slams into his head- Ilya. Ilya. Ilya. 

    -

    or the zombie apocalypse happens and Ilya Rozanov travels the span of America to get to Shane Hollander's side again.

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    23 Jul 2026

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    @ russianbear clove 

     roz is so fucking funny man had two seconds to process and he spent them thinking about how to get that ass

    @ icemenace Ro - he's so real

    @ shaneybugbug Libby - oh he's been WAITING for this 

    @ iwant81 Abbie - he was so obviously joking oh my god 

    @ russianbear clove  - ummmm i don't think so

    @ iwant81 Abbie - rozanov likes girls english just isn't his first language so he accidentally made it look like something you freaks are taking advantage of

    @ russianbear clove - so he's joking or it was an accident??? Istg at least chose one

     

    or - Shane Hollander comes out and Ilya loses his mind

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    21 Jul 2026

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    Forester (Admirals🔛🔝)
    So the true way to combat the Bisexual Russian Terminator isn’t with homophobia...
    It's actually with even more gay
    ...
    You're a goddamn genius.

    ----

    The NHL rookies have joined forces to strategize now that two of the greatest hockey players of all time are on the same team and Ilya Rozanov must suffer from the unintended consequences of making hockey more woke.

    Mainly, the way everyone keeps implying that they want to fuck his husband.

    or: a group of rookies unionize and employ chirping as a form of psychological torture against a one Ilya Grigoryevich Rozanov.

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    21 Jul 2026

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    Shane is still learning that he doesn't have to be perfect in his own relationship. Ilya is still learning the rules of Shane's bad days. So when Shane tries to push him away after a crushing loss, it leads to a tense argument. But ten years of rivalry are no match for Shane’s tears; the second he starts to cry, Ilya folds like a house of cards.

    Or: Shane tries to starve himself as punishment for losing, Ilya tries to feed him, and it turns into a very soft night of pampering because Ilya is legally incapable of staying angry at a crying Shane.

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    21 Jul 2026

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    “Ah.”

    “‘Ah’,” Ilya repeats, giving him a look before he looks back to the tidily stacked frozen mouse packages in the freezer and makes a face as a little badly-hidden shudder moves through him. “Why the fuck do you have mice in your freezer, Shane? You are doing serial killer shit now? This is why you have cottage in the middle of nowhere? For serial killer things?”

    “It’s for Spaghetti,” Shane says.

    Ilya gives him an absolutely horrified look at that and turns a little green, which makes him remember that Spaghetti isn’t just his snake's name.

    “Not food!” He rushes to explain. “Not food spaghetti! Snake Spaghetti!”

    “What the fuck are you even saying right now,” Ilya says, looking honestly a little concerned that Shane might have something going wrong in his head.

    (Distancing himself from almost twenty years of owning a snake, Shane can indeed see why this situation might be a little alarming for someone on the outside looking in.)

    (It also clues him in to the fact that maybe it’s not just Spaghetti who should have gotten a little adjustment period.)

    (in which i give shane allergies AND a snake)

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    20 Jul 2026

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