dearest_gentle_reader



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Penelope Featherington knows these three things to be true:

    1) She has no time or interest in swiping right on any dating apps to find her elusive soulmate
    2) Inventing a fake perfect "boyfriend" is the only way to get her nagging mother off her back
    3) The perfect man only exists in her fantasies

    So when he suddenly appears on an ordinary day, corporeal and literally manifested straight out her dreams, what the hell is she supposed to do?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,800
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    212
    Kudos:
    647
    Bookmarks:
    160
    Hits:
    7,368

    26 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark 16

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    He could not recall his birth, or how old he was when she came into existence, only that by then his growth was only half finished. What he could recall in exactitude was the curious sight of a squirrel burying the seed she came from. He had seen it rip a fruit from a tree at the other side of the park –a rather exorbitant tree, if you asked him– opposing him. Has seen it stuff a bunch of its seed inside its cheeks and save one for later. He did not know if the furry creature forgot about it or if he meant to leave his new companion so close to him.

    or: tree Polin fic from Colin's pov

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,327
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    19
    Kudos:
    89
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    622

    24 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 70

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    It's not the first time Colin has woken up with a dry mouth, an achy body and a severe case of ‘what the hell did I do last night?’ but it is definitely the first time he has woken up here.

    What’s happening…?

    What is this place…?

    Is that Penelope he can hear…?

    His panic and confusion melt away at the sound of her voice and he feels a sense of relief. Penelope is close, she’s here… she’s… very close, actually… very, very close.

    Wait… Is she…? Is he…? Could he be…?

    Inside her?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    30,572
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    333
    Kudos:
    312
    Bookmarks:
    70
    Hits:
    7,907

    23 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Penelope is convinced to attend the university’s annual winter carnival under the promise she’ll see the rarely-in-London-anymore Colin Bridgerton. When she does spot him, however, he’s running the football team’s kissing booth.

    Which makes her want to throw up, quite frankly.

    Perplexingly, it also puts certain things in motion Colin discovers he is not prepared for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    67,609
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    485
    Kudos:
    596
    Bookmarks:
    125
    Hits:
    15,977

    20 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark 38

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    At Eloise's wedding, Colin hatches a plan to pretend to be dating Penelope, creating wild and elaborate stories. However, when one story hits too close to be fake, the pair have to face some home truths.

     

    ("You want me to fake date you at your sister's wedding?"

    "Yes." He says simply, in all seriousness. "But we commit to the bit. Fully. We make it weird. Every crazy idea you could possibly have, we do. No matter how wacky, we tell people about it. We could have a lot of fun with it."

    Selfishly, she thinks it would show her what it would be like to be his. Just for one night.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,714
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    31
    Kudos:
    230
    Bookmarks:
    38
    Hits:
    2,115

    18 Jun 2026