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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane is heavier than he used to be; his weight bears down on Ilya in a new way. He’s put on pounds of muscle since Ilya last touched him like this. Ilya flattens his palms, skims them under Shane’s undershirt, feels the flat solidity of his abs, the bulk of his lats, the swell of his chest. It’s the same and it’s new, this body; it’s the boy he couldn’t stop thinking about when he was 18 and the man he loved enough to let go at 26 and the person who somehow always comes to find him when he’s lost.

    A stranger, and the love of his life.

     

    or, Ilya's father doesn't die in 2017; Ilya breaks up with Shane instead of confessing his love. They get older, but not any less stupid about each other. Shane gets a boyfriend; Ilya gets on medication; they work on becoming whole people. And they always find their way back to each other.

    OR a story for those who love Shane and Ilya's baby love but ALSO think it's hot when people in their thirties make active choices about who they are and what they want in their partner!!

    Note: the "cheating" tag refers to the relationship between Shane and his aforementioned BF, not to Shane and Ilya cheating on each other.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    70,339
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    1,460
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    7,367
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    3,346
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    10 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane had been used to being alone. He'd never thought of himself as lonely. He honestly often craved the solitude, found it grounding. But that was before he knew what it was like to have someone to call, someone to touch. He was never lonely before Rozanov, but he'd been lonely ever since.

    April 2017: Shane does not get laid out on the ice.

    Ilya goes through with ending it.

    Shane lets him.

    What follows is eleven months of distance, denial, and a quiet kind of devastation neither of them knows how to name, let alone fix.

    They learn how to live without each other.

    (Or at least, how to pretend.)

    And then, almost a year later, the infamous collision happens and Shane goes down cold.

    And suddenly, neither of them can pretend it doesn’t matter.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,126
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    915
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    5,674
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    1,659
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    04 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    It starts, as most things do, for completely wholesome and safe for work reasons. Shane just wants to help his boyfriend destress a little, and maybe find a few ways for Shane himself to relax a bit more.

    However, as most things involving Ilya Rozanov tend to do, those wholesome and safe for work reasons quickly spiral into something hotter and darker that makes Shane shamefully hard, and that's all before he's even asked Ilya to hypnotize him into some mindless plaything. Fuck.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    35,372
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    662
    Kudos:
    1,398
    Bookmarks:
    365
    Hits:
    43,491

    29 May 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane wants to figure out if he's gay before he gets drafted—and no, the way he felt when Ilya Rozanov smirked at him with a cigarette between his lips in Saskatchewan has nothing to do with it. Unfortunately, the random guy he hooks up with to try and make sure one way or another takes a picture, and Shane gets outed before the draft. In the ensuing scandal, he goes seventh overall, to Ottawa.

    It turns out, having the worst thing you can think of happen to you when you're seventeen years old can end up being pretty liberating. And land you an unexpected best friend.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,229
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    1,253
    Kudos:
    7,605
    Bookmarks:
    2,454
    Hits:
    65,654

    28 May 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    As his breathing turned rapid and labored, he felt the unmistakable presence of a foreign force pulling him through a closed door. He heard a lock. Before his mind could process the occurrence, he was suddenly enveloped - caught in the unyielding grip of two powerful arms - unforgivingly tight. He couldn’t see who, he could barely process where and why, but he felt himself shaking and his eyes burning and leaking raindrops on the shoulder of the force who squeezed tighter. Minutes passed, who knows how many, in complete silence other than the gasps coming from Shane as he sobbed. When he felt his heart reach a relatively normal pace, and the drumming in his ears quieted, he felt himself melt for a moment in the arms he still hadn’t recognized until he heard the voice. “Hollander, you are having panic attack.” Shane froze.

    *****************

    Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov are true rivals.

    5 years into their MLH careers, Shane Hollander is outed and the only one there to save him is the man he hates the most.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    65,690
    Chapters:
    13/?
    Comments:
    342
    Kudos:
    1,361
    Bookmarks:
    825
    Hits:
    47,503

    27 May 2026