hymns_of_hate



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    Summary

    In the wake of the kal-if-fee on Vulcan, Kirk is dead. When T’Pau tells Spock to live long and prosper, he knows he shall do neither. This is a story about men who love each other, and the lengths they will go to for one another.

    -
    Foolish, he thinks. I have been a fool.

    How he had wanted so desperately to prove his Vulcan side. How all his life it had felt like a performance, and yet, to be finally subject to the most Vulcan thing of all destroyed him. The stripping of logic. All sense torn from him. His carefully constructed barriers had collapsed like a flimsy house of cards. To be granted his wish this way was a type of mockery. How he had wanted to be fully Vulcan. To prove that the blood which runs through his veins was not so human.

    How wanting had been better than having.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    166,262
    Chapters:
    27/27
    Comments:
    670
    Kudos:
    612
    Bookmarks:
    173
    Hits:
    16,804

    06 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    this fic made me cry several times and nothing more than socks coming in threes, as much as this story has to do with romantic love, the really important part to me wasn’t that at all. i’ve agonised over being loveless my entire life, and i really doubt that i’ll stop now, but there’s a solace i take in that pair of threes, and i find a catharsis in it