idiotsensei



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “Oh. What Zoro finds pretty? That’s obvious."

    “It is?” Sanji asks, shocked.

    “It is?” Zoro asks, eyes wide.

    Or: six times Sanji tries to guess Zoro’s type, and one time Zoro asks for his.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,882
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
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    3,879
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    16 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    "It’s not a big deal if people smooch Sanji, is it?”

    “I mean it’s kind of a big deal to me,” Sanji mumbles under his breath.

    Sanji gets an allergy that makes everyone lust after him. Zoro is apparently immune.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,243
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    175
    Kudos:
    4,429
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    929
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    15 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “You’re not—” He pauses for a moment. “You’re not looking at me. Zoro. Can you…”

    Oh. Shit.

    “I can’t see.” Now that he’s noticed, it’s very obvious.

    Zoro loses his eyesight to a devil fruit user. He thinks it's all right. Sanji, for some reason, doesn't.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,495
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    70
    Kudos:
    1,734
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    370
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    12,641

    12 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “-Zoro lost his ability to regulate his temperature. He won’t sweat, shiver, or be able to tell when he’s too hot or too cold. When he fought Luffy he pushed himself to hyperthermia without realising, and the heatstroke made him faint. Maintaining that temperature could cause heart and kidney failure, then major damage to his brain, and even-“ Chopper squeaked as he made eye contact with Zoro, who was giving him a disapproving look while he rolled the thermometer between his teeth with his tongue.

    “We all know Mosshead doesn’t have the brain cells to spare getting brain damage, so what do we do?” Sanji piped up, earning a growl from Zoro across the room.

    “There’s no solution quite like skin to skin contact. Hugs with as few layers as you’re comfortable with. Just like a baby bird!”

    Sanji snorted, trying to reconcile the fuming swordsman with any kind of cute baby animal. Especially when Zoro looked like he was debating homicide or suicide, but it would surely be one of them.

    -

    Or, touch-starved and emotionally constipated Roronoa Zoro has to get hugs from his Nakama or he'll die.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,691
    Chapters:
    13/13
    Comments:
    193
    Kudos:
    1,059
    Bookmarks:
    190
    Hits:
    13,494

    06 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Sanji was sure he heard the idiot incorrectly. It was the only possibility.

    “Gross, dude—TMI,” Usopp grimaces.

    “What do you mean? I spread men all of the time!” Zoro shoots back with an indignant scowl.

    Okay, then Sanji heard him perfectly.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,864
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    241
    Kudos:
    2,389
    Bookmarks:
    367
    Hits:
    26,898

    29 Jun 2026