mindphalluss
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Recent works
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Reversing Superlatives by mindphalluss
Fandoms: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
14 Oct 2013
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Summary
Because today is a special day. And there are some things that you still don't know yet.
There are still things I haven't had the chance, nor the resolve, to tell you.
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Inspired by Alone on the Water, this is a letter Sherlock writes to John before his death.
Just a short sherlockian-take on Jame's speech in Third Star.
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Solar Retinopathy by mindphalluss
Fandoms: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
29 Sep 2013
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Summary
"He should not stay, because surely the world’s only consulting detective would know that a naked and wet John Watson would be marginally more angry upon discovering that his supposedly dead flatmate has broken into his flat than would a clothed and dry John Watson."
In which I posted a bunch of prompts on tumblr for other people to fill, but then my hand slipped and I ended up filling one of them myself.
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
Hermione's eighth year at Hogwarts is already going to be difficult in the aftermath of the war, but is further thrown into upheaval when Headmistress McGonagall orders a re-sorting of all students to promote inter-house unity. But when the Sorting Hat sends Hermione to Ravenclaw with Draco - and without Harry or Ron - how will she cope? [Epilogue? What epilogue?] Prevalent alchemy.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 292,798
- Chapters:
- 71/71
- Collections:
- 65
- Comments:
- 5,944
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- 24,476
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- 8,674
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Bookmarked by mindphalluss
21 Jun 2026
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Summary
"On a scale of one to ten, how comfortable would you say you are with me physically?" she asked.
"Zero."
Hermione's lips pursed in annoyance because she really should have seen that coming. How charming that the extent of his arseholery could still surprise her.In which Hermione is determined to find a loophole to free her from a forced marriage with Draco Malfoy. But with only two weeks until they are legally required to consummate, it would be irresponsible not to prepare for every contingency.
Series
- Part 1 of Ten out of Ten and Counting
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 61,559
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Collections:
- 51
- Comments:
- 2,392
- Kudos:
- 24,860
- Bookmarks:
- 8,857
- Hits:
- 884,480
Bookmarked by mindphalluss
21 Jun 2026
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Summary
If there’s one thing Hermione Granger is good at, it’s using magic to fix her problems. And this time, her problem is sex.
Luckily, she has the perfect solution: a locket enchanted with the Patented Daydream Charm. Whenever she opens it, she’ll find herself in Dreamland, where she can live out all her filthiest fantasies risk-free.
The magic is a bit tricky, though. For some reason, Malfoy keeps showing up there with her. Thank goodness it’s only an illusion—if that was really him, she would never live it down.
Meanwhile, Draco is determined to figure out who the fuck is cursing him to suffer through highly realistic, erotic hallucinations of his secret childhood crush. When he finds the culprit, there will be hell to pay.
Series
- Part 1 of Sin's Dreamland Collection
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 229,630
- Chapters:
- 39/39
- Collections:
- 30
- Comments:
- 6,195
- Kudos:
- 25,954
- Bookmarks:
- 8,566
- Hits:
- 1,706,444
Bookmarked by mindphalluss
21 Jun 2026
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The Disappearances of Draco Malfoy by speechwriter
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
18 Jun 2021
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Summary
The night that Harry and Dumbledore return from the cave, the Death Eaters are delayed from reaching the top of the Astronomy Tower for one more minute. Draco Malfoy lowers his wand.
A Deathly Hallows rewrite in which Draco accepts Dumbledore's offer to fake his death and go into hiding with the Order of the Phoenix.
Series
- Part 1 of The Disappearances of Draco Malfoy
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 289,780
- Chapters:
- 33/33
- Collections:
- 90
- Comments:
- 5,600
- Kudos:
- 26,171
- Bookmarks:
- 12,628
- Hits:
- 1,862,336
Bookmarked by mindphalluss
21 Jun 2026
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Summary
For a moment, she's almost giddy. Because Draco Malfoy's been ruined by this war and he's as out of place as she is and — yes, he has scars too. He's got an even bigger one. She wonders whether one day they'll compare sizes.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 148,908
- Chapters:
- 51/51
- Collections:
- 122
- Comments:
- 6,013
- Kudos:
- 36,391
- Bookmarks:
- 11,081
- Hits:
- 1,578,504
Bookmarked by mindphalluss
21 Jun 2026