saturnreturn
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Rio quickly fished around for their wallet, pulled out a bill, and forced their legs to push their body up and stick one leg in front of the other until they were at the bit of the stage where people were meant to tip before they talked themself out of it. The woman’s eyes were strikingly blue. And Rio had been paying so much attention to the color it wasn’t until the bill slipped into the woman’s fingers and her expertly-shaped brows minutely raised in surprise that Rio saw Benjamin Franklin’s face on the bill.
Okay, fuck. What was Rio going to do, take it back? They felt their face heat up as they dragged their feet back to their chair. It was a miracle they didn’t faint right there on the sticky bar floor.
_____
OR, the AU where Agatha is a drag queen and Rio falls for her instantly.
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It’s 1993, and state agent Rio Vidal is put on the case of a fire that resulted in the deaths of three high-ranking members of a small town religious group called the Salem Seven. The only survivor, 21-year-old Agatha Harkness, is stubborn, uncooperative, and her only source of joy seems to be making Rio’s job that much harder. In a moment of sympathy, and maybe even pity, Rio warms up to her anyway. But this seemingly open-and-shut case turns eerie the deeper Rio digs, and the longer Rio stays in the town of Venner, Oklahoma, the more she feels like she isn’t going to like what she finds.
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“Hmmm.” Agatha tossed her phone onto the couch beside her. “I kind of like the idea of being a mystery to them. The woman that can make their scary boss roll over and ask for tummy scratches.”
“I wouldn’t say it’s that drastic,” Rio protested, closing the door with the heel of her shoe.
“Oh?” Agatha tilted her head cockily. She grinned at Rio like an orca would grin at an injured seal. “And if I asked you to roll over?”
Rio blushed. “You don’t really mean that.”
“Try me.”
_____Neck-deep in her thesis year, Agatha hasn’t seen her girlfriend of four months in an excruciatingly long time: an entire week. This calls for a work visit. AKA, the discord kitten au sequel.
Series
- Part 2 of agathario discord kitten au
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where art thou, why not uponeth me? by saturnreturn for midwestprincess_01
Fandoms: Agatha All Along (TV)
03 Feb 2026
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Dr. Vidal takes the wand and slowly slips it inside of her. It goes in seamlessly. Agatha’s neck feels tense, and she tries to lean her head back to loosen things up.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Dr. Vidal looks up at Agatha with big baby brown eyes. “If you’re anxious, we can stop, or I can give you a pheromone patch—”
“I’m perfectly fine,” Agatha snaps, and then she blurts out, “I’m not nervous!”
Dr. Vidal just blinks at her owlishly, and Agatha presses her lips together. Fuck. What if the doctor connects the dots? Agatha isn’t nervous, just embarrassed. It isn’t her fault she encompasses a physical body and, by objective accounts, Dr. Vidal is attractive.
And smells good.
Whatever.
“Okay,” Dr. Vidal says softly. “My apologies.”
_____OR, Agatha finds herself in a predicament: she's pregnant, single, and in her forties, and the only gynecologist that is qualified to help her is alpha Dr. Rio Vidal.
Written for Agatha All Along Week, day 7: breeding ;-)
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you and i can stay awake and keep on dreaming by saturnreturn
Fandoms: Agatha All Along (TV)
15 Jan 2026
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Rio’s dark eyes instantly slid over to Billy. She cocked her head ominously. “Do you know what a heart outside of its own ribcage looks like?”
Billy felt his forehead, which had suddenly warmed. He squeaked out, “Uh… no?”
Rio wore a completely straight face when she asked, “Would you like to find out?”
-- AKA, Agatha and Billy run into Rio after the events of the show.
For AgathaRio Canon Week, Day 6, "After the Road".
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Riverpaw, a ThunderClan medicine cat apprentice, finds herself embroiled in a plot to help ShadowClan warrior Spiritpaw smuggle kittens away from ShadowClan so that they are not forced into warrior training at two moons, like Spiritpaw was.
So many kittens have died and been killed already, and Spiritpaw's mother, ShadowClan leader Ravenstar, has been blaming Spiritpaw for their deaths, telling the rest of the Clans she is a Kitkiller. Riverpaw and Spiritpaw are trapped in a terrible situation; their relationship is already doubly forbidden - they are cats from different Clans, and Riverpaw is a medicine cat and not allowed to mate.
A series of unexpected events at the Thunderpath when they meet one night to smuggle more kittens into ThunderClan, will change everything.
AKA, the insane warrior cats agathario au that nobody asked for. information on warrior cats and all the character names/descriptions in 2nd chapter. happy bday saturn!
Bookmarked by saturnreturn
15 Feb 2026
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She knocks her knee against Agatha’s thigh. Agatha looks up at her, eyes guarded and anguished. Still, she manages to roll them.
“Oh, I’m sure seeing me bested by my cunt of a mother and then almost killed just turned you right on.”
“You know me,” Rio says cheerfully. “I’m just an animal.” She winks for good measure.
“You sick freak,” Agatha says, a hint of warmth in her tone.
__
Post 1x05, Rio is concerned AND horny.
Series
- Part 2 of moments in the woods
Bookmarked by saturnreturn
16 Oct 2024
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@redhead-lesbian to @rosetoy (5/13/24 - 7:34 AM): Margaery, she reblogged my post
@rosetoy to @redhead-lesbian (5/13/24 - 7:35 AM): ali, it is not even 8 in the morning. what are you talking about
@redhead-lesbian to @rosetoy (5/13/24 - 7:36 AM): @baddragon. The new user who posted that really sexy hand pic…that I may have been thinking about when writing the post she reblogged!
@rosetoy to @redhead-lesbian (5/13/24 - 7:36 AM): girl get it together. dm her if you really want
@redhead-lesbian to @rosetoy (5/13/24 - 7:37 AM): I absolutely will not do that, thank you very much.
or
the smutty tumblr au no one asked for
Bookmarked by saturnreturn
04 Sep 2024
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What does Opal want Asami to say? That she thought Korra was so fucking gorgeous she could barely speak to her? That as the night went on, Asami couldn't help that her gaze kept finding its way to her thick forearms or that she’d noticed every time her top had ridden up a little too high—enough for Asami to see more than one row of Korra’s abdominal muscles? That when Asami stumbled into her apartment last night she’d immediately kicked off her wet panties and fell into bed with her favorite toy?
She shivers at the memory.
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Or, Korrasami (Taylor's Version). Inspired by "Paper Rings," "Gorgeous," and "Dress."Bookmarked by saturnreturn
26 Apr 2024
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Lena Luthor needs a husband, Clark Danvers needs an easy resolution to his cash flow problem.
Unfortunately, the best laid plans often go awry.
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Or, Lena Luthor is actually rich, but Clark Danvers isn't actually Clark Danvers. It's complicated.
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- English
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Bookmarked by saturnreturn
24 Dec 2022