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Mahiru hasn't seen Fuuta since two days ago. Normally, something like that might not be unusual, but it is given the circumstances. See, she spends a lot of time in the common areas of the prison. Which is, well. It's a prison. It's really hard to not run into each other when you're stuck somewhere like Milgram, and it almost makes her think he's been avoiding her, you know?
And she thought they were finally starting to get along, even though he's... not exactly the nicest person ever. That just made it more exciting to rise to the challenge of trying to befriend someone like him, and she thought it was working, so why— wait, is that him...?
"Fuuta-kun, Fuuta-kun!" She waves him down eagerly, cheerfully calling his name. The slight against her can be easily forgotten, now that he's here. "I didn't see you at all yesterday! Mahiru missed you, you know, so don't scare me like that!"
Fuuta, on his part, just stares at her in bewilderment. Though, it's sort of hard to read him. The mask he usually wears is fully covering his face today, even though he usually wears it more loosely. "It hasn't been that long," he says, frustrated. "You'll live. I don't really feel like talking right now, okay, so can't you go play buddies with like, Mikoto or the girls or something?"
"But we're friends, too... and I was worried about you!"
"That's great. Not in the mood. I already said so." His words are blunt and he turns to leave, but Mahiru's not letting him go that easy. Something is going on here, she's sure! Fuuta is blunt, and rude, but he's never this rude to her anymore!
"Where are you going? Oh, are you hungry? You weren't at dinner yesterday, after all... hey, Mahiru's really good at-"
"It's fine," he snaps. "I asked Yuno to bring food back for me, and she did. I'm taking care of myself just fine, I just don't want to talk to anyone right now, so can you stop being so annoying and leave ?" He glares at her in a way that is distinctly mean. He never, ever looks at her like that. Annoyed, sure, but not angry.
She's a little surprised by it, and can't help the tears that appear at the corners of her eyes. "I thought we were friends!" Mahiru whines. "But now you don't want to talk to me at all? I just wanted to make sure you were okay!" How could he? What happened? Everything was fine, and now he's treating her like this? He really is a bully, just like she thought, awful, he's awful—
"Hey, wait, don't do that, fuck..." Fuuta has not taken the opportunity to leave, she realizes. Actually, he looks really upset that she's crying. "Mahiru. It's not you, I just... I need you to not be here right now. But it's- we are friends or whatever, I guess, okay?"
"You hate me," Mahiru sobs. "You're only saying that to get me to stop crying."
Fuuta audibly takes a deep breath. "Mahiru," he says, very carefully. "If I hated you, then why the fuck would I even care if you're crying?"
"...Oh... you wouldn't?" she answers hopefully. "So you don't hate me?"
"Yeah, no shit. Look-" He makes a weird expression for a moment before continuing, one Mahiru can't quite figure out. "Just- we're good. I don't hate you. Stop following me. Okay?"
Fuuta doesn't give her the chance to reply before walking off and around the corner, very hurriedly. And unfortunately for him, still in earshot.
It's very audible when he sneezes twice in a row.
Mahiru rounds the corner. Fuuta is leaning against the wall, his mask resting at his chin like usual. He inhales sharply before muffling a third sneeze into his elbow.
"Fuuta-kun?"
He startles, looking at her like a deer caught in headlights. Immediately, he pulls his mask back up. "I told you to leave me alone!" he snaps. And now that she's thinking of it, doesn't his voice have a little more raspiness to it than usual?
"Oh… you're sick, aren't you. And you were trying to hide it from me, right? That's why you kept telling me to go away."
Fuuta winces, knowing he's been caught out. "You can't tell anyone. Especially not Shidou."
"...Why not? I'm sure he'd be able to help."
"I don't want his help!" he shouts, realizing a little too late how loud he is. More quietly, he adds, "I just want to be alone."
Mahiru thinks about this. She doesn't like being alone, especially not if she isn't feeling well. Maybe Fuuta is different, but she doesn't really think people are all that different from each other when it comes to things like this, right?
"I know!" she says brightly. "I could help take care of you! Mahiru's really good at these sorts of things~"
He stares blankly at her. "Are you stupid? I just said I didn't want anybody's help."
"You said you didn't want me to get Shidou. That's different than not wanting my help, isn't it? Please, Fuuta-kun?"
It's a little selfish, but maybe she wants the chance to prove to herself that she can be useful. That she can try and do something for someone without hurting him.
And… besides, Fuuta seems like the type who could use it. People being nice to him more often, that is.
"I can take care of myself." He's being stubborn about it, but Mahiru can be stubborn too, when she wants. And try as he might, it's hard to be intimidating when his words are immediately followed by a kind of pathetic-sounding sniffle.
She steps closer and ignores the way Fuuta instinctively tries to draw back. "You can," she says, "I'm sure. You're very strong, after all."
That's true, and it's something she can't help but admire him for. Fuuta always acts like he knows what he wants, like he knows what he's doing. That isn't like Mahiru at all, and she knows it. She's never been very good at taking care of herself, but she's sure Fuuta must be. It's just…
"Isn't it a bit lonely, though? Or difficult? Sometimes it's just nicer to have someone to do things for you, especially when you're not feeling well."
Fuuta seems to consider this. In the end, whether it's her argument getting through to him, a realization that it does indeed make his life easier if he's able to get Mahiru to do what he wants, or simply acknowledgement of the fact she definitely isn't giving up any time soon— "Fine," he sighs. "Do what you want. Actually, you know where Es leaves stuff we request?"
Mahiru nods eagerly.
"That's where I was going, but if you're going to hover around trying to do stuff for me, you can go get my things, I guess. Not like I want anyone seeing me like this. It's… probably easier to avoid that if I can just go back to my room."
"I can do that, no problem!" She smiles warmly at him. "Leave it to Mahiru!"
"Yeah, that's what I'm doing," Fuuta mutters, not lingering for long before shuffling back down the hallway in the direction of their rooms.
Right! Mahiru is going to do such a good job at this. She's going to be the best delivery girl ever, which is a totally doable task. It's easy, and it helps Fuuta, which is great. That's all she wants. As long as she's helping.
It's not far until she reaches the warehouse and, in the corner, finds a paper bag clearly labeled with his name. She tries to resist the urge to peek inside, but… her curiosity wins out after a moment.
Oh, he really is taking care of himself. At just a glance, there's a few boxes of tissues and a package of cough drops right at the top of the bag.
It's kind of endearing, to be honest. Fuuta really was just planning on toughing it out by himself, and doing a pretty good job of it. Mahiru can't help but think that while it's certainly admirable, it also seems… incredibly lonely.
Maybe it'd be better if it was someone else there for him. Mahiru says she's good at this, but really, she knows she's liable to mess it all up. Fuuta doesn't want someone better suited for it, though. He accepted help from her.
Never mind that she had to beg him to.
Ah, right, he probably wants this stuff doesn't he? She should really hurry up and go find him. He said he'd be in his room, didn't he? It feels a little odd going into someone else's room, especially one of the boys, but she'll manage it. Fuuta needs her, after all.
Is she supposed to knock, or just go in? The doors don't lock from the inside, so she could just go in… and it wouldn't be fair to make him get up to let her in, right? That makes sense, doesn't it?
Yes, it definitely does. She opens the door and carefully enters the room. "Fuuta-kun! I'm here, I brought your things!"
Fuuta, as it turns out, is currently face-down on the bed. Not in it, just on it. He groans a little when Mahiru calls his name, and sits up rather groggily.
"Oh, sorry, did you fall asleep…? Did I wake you? I'm really sorry if I did!"
Fuuta yawns and shrugs. "Wasn't really asleep anyway, just…" he waves his hand in a vague gesture. "Whatever. You're fine."
It seems to Mahiru like he just fell asleep and doesn't want to admit it, because she's not sure what else he means, but… it doesn't really matter.
"Okay, then… um, is there anything you need or want?"
Wordlessly, he gestures for her to hand him the bag of items he'd requested. He rummages through to the bottom of it before retrieving a bottle of what Mahiru recognizes as some sort of sports drink. Fuuta coughs a little, then uncaps it and takes a drink. He turns to look at Mahiru.
"...Thanks," he mutters. "You can go now."
Mahiru frowns. "What do you mean go? Oh, did you want me to go get something else for you? I can do that, no problem!"
Fuuta's looking at her weirdly again. Mahiru doesn't understand why.
"No, you… you can just go? I don't need anything anymore?" He sniffles. "You don't need to hang around or anything."
"Mahiru's taking care of you!" she insists. "I can't just leave now after doing one thing! That's not how that works. You're still sick. What if you do need something else later?"
"Then I'll go get it myself…? I'm not helpless."
She sighs a little, getting frustrated. "I know you aren't helpless!" Why's he acting like this? Why does he keep pushing her away? Or does he… not understand? Mahiru stops, tilting her head a little. "Has nobody ever taken care of you when you're sick before?"
"Huh? What kind of a question is that? Of course they did, when I was a kid. I don't get why you keep saying you're doing it now, though."
"Your parents don't–"
Fuuta interrupts her before she can finish. "My dad," he emphasizes– oh, Mahiru hadn't known– "doesn't anymore, no. He knows I can look after myself. I'm an adult, obviously?"
"Fuuta-kun. What do you think taking care of someone means?"
"Why are you asking such weird questions, seriously? Like… it's just doing stuff for them if they can't, right?"
Oh. Mahiru is beginning to understand the problem now. Fuuta is completely blind to the emotional aspect of it.
"Yes and no," she says gently. "It means being there for someone, right? Not just for what they can't do, but for what they just… don't want to. Just small things, to try and make them feel better." Mahiru perks up a little. "Oh, like, my mama–"
("Your mama?" Fuuta scoffs. Mahiru ignores him.)
" Ahem, I was saying, she always used to make my favorite foods for me when I wasn't feeling good. Even though it wasn't anything I needed, and I could've just made something easy for myself, it was nice and made me feel better, you know? I want you to feel better."
Fuuta doesn't seem to know what to do with this. He just looks at her for a minute, in a bewildered sort of way. If he was going to say anything, he doesn't get the chance before doubling over coughing. Even with the mask on, he still instinctively brings his arm up to cover his mouth– Mahiru notes this as being sort of cute.
She steps a little closer and gently rubs a hand against his back. "It's okay," she murmurs soothingly, on instinct.
Fuuta glares at her as he recovers, but doesn't pull away from her touch. "...I don't really get it," he mutters. "But if you want to stay, I guess you can. Just don't go whining about it if I'm not any fun to hang out with, or if you get sick too."
"I won't," Mahiru agrees. "Complain or get sick, I mean." She figures it's fine, it's not like she catches things that easily. Besides that, she can't help but notice that Fuuta's being particularly diligent in trying to keep his germs to himself.
He sighs. "If you say so." It's quiet for a second, before Fuuta shifts a little, and Mahiru finally withdraws her hand. There's a lot of room on the bed next to him now, and he gestures towards it. "C'mon. You can sit too if you're gonna hang around."
Mahiru takes the invitation to sit, while Fuuta sets himself to unpacking the rest of the supply bag, its contents getting opened and placed on the bedside table. He unwraps one of the cough drops and pops it into his mouth.
"I still really don't know what you're trying to do right now," Fuuta comments. "I'm not doing anything, I don't need anything…"
"Isn't it nicer than being alone?" He freezes, not answering. Mahiru continues. "I don't like being by myself when I'm not feeling good. Being lonely isn't good for you either." She smiles. "Maybe I just believe in the healing powers of good company."
"That's dumb," Fuuta retorts. "I don't really mind being alone. Mostly I've just been trying to sleep it off, anyway."
"It's good you've been resting," she admits, "but are you sure you don't mind it? Sometimes it can be hard to see what you've been missing until it's there." Love was like that, wasn't it? Mahiru never knew how empty her life was before until he'd come into it.
Maybe that's why she needs to be here. Fuuta reminds her of herself. Fuuta reminds her of…
"You're such an idiot," he mumbles. "Stop trying to act like you know anything about me." It's all talk, and they both know it. Mahiru reaches over and puts an arm around him, pulling Fuuta closer. He doesn't protest in the slightest– he just wants the deniability of Mahiru initiating.
This way, he can pretend she's not right. He can pretend he doesn't want it.
The way Fuuta leans into her touch and visibly relaxes when she ruffles a hand through his hair betrays him. Mahiru laughs softly.
"Told you it's nice to let yourself be taken care of," she teases. "Just let me know if you need anything else. Or if you want me to stop."
"Don't stop," he says as if it pains him to admit. She smiles, and keeps gently stroking her hand through his hair. It's softer than she would've thought. Fuuta contains unexpected depths, as always.
It's endearing, really. Captivating. He's so funny, full of contradictions. It makes Mahiru want to know more about him, she wants everything there is to know. She–
No.
No, she can't. That's not–
She can't say it. He's a friend. That's all. It's not perfect like that at all, and it'd only go all wrong again if it was… if she tried to…
The moment passes and Mahiru's not left to continue along that line of thought. Fuuta sits up straight and pulls away from her suddenly, muffling a particularly harsh-sounding sneeze into his shirt sleeve.
"You didn't have to move, you know." She passes him a tissue box. Fuuta gives her a look as he takes it from her.
"Yes I do. Idiot." He turns even further away from her when he lowers his mask to blow his nose. Mahiru laughs.
"Why?" she asks innocently, though the smug look on her face betrays her intentions.
Fuuta groans. "Do you have to do this? You know why."
"I want you to say it~"
He gives a long-suffering sigh, not meeting her eyes as he grits out the words, "Fine! I don't… I don't want you to get sick too, okay?"
Mahiru giggles. "Fuuta-kun cares about me~" she says in a sing-song tone. "You liiike me–"
"Agh! Gross! I do not, shut up, I'll kick you out of here right now!" He shoves her away gently, but Mahiru only leans right back in.
"You won't, you like me!" It's funny how the mood can change so quickly. Mahiru's not really thinking about any of that anymore, at least not in such a melancholy way.
Maybe she can't touch, but she can look, right? Just to herself, she can acknowledge how cute he is, caring about her like that. Even cuter that he refuses to admit it. He's not a bully at all, just a sheep in wolf's clothing.
"Hey, Fuuta-kun?"
"Eh?"
"Do you feel better now? Than you would've by yourself, I mean?" She looks at him knowingly, at the way his eyes widen slightly and he looks away.
"...A little. I guess. You're still annoying," he grumbles, crossing his arms across his chest. "But… maybe I can kinda see what you meant."
Her heart flutters, a small victory obtained. She made him happy, right? So it's okay? It's okay for her to be just a little selfish like this, as long as Fuuta's happy too?
She hopes it is.
When he looks back at her, over the top of his mask, he's smiling with his eyes.
