Chapter Text
Dear Diary.
A long...long...time ago...
...
Fuck it this isn't a fairytale.
The lab I grew up in? Nobody bothered to tell us what its name is. Apparently, they partnered with something called JCJenson, but their deal was kind of flimsy.
Actually, make that a lot flimsy. Huge difference on the outlook of things, and sheesh, was it a catfight! They disbanded after the laboratory refused to give up their tech for a planet called 'Copper 9'.
But WHATEVER. I couldn't give a shit less about their situation. It's like a divorce type sit.
Anyway. Me, Lilith, Mirage, the others, and the V-Bros, we're still in hell. Don't know how long we can stay here, but we're currently settled in wrath. But no fancy schmancy furniture or anything.
Despite its name it actually looks quite peaceful. Ever since the leviathan beast was killed.
...What, you thought it was the actual sin? Nah. Pretty sure the real Leviathan is still out there.
For Gabriel and Ariel, pretty sure they got this whole 'council' thing sorted. And the holy flame is back or something. They were a huge help in Violence Layer against the Earthmover 'Benjamin' though. And Fraud. And Treachery but you know the deal. They're back home in heaven right now.
...And Bronwyn and Heather are still blissfully unaware as usual.
Wait so apparently Lilith spotted a 'giant four-point star portal with a yellow glow and black in the middle'.
...Okay...
I guess I'll finish writing this up later, after we check it out.
- Eve
BOOTING UP //
EXPOSITION
"We are Worker Drones: autonomous robots helping humans mine exoplanets for our interstellar parent company, JC Jenson, IN SPAAAAACEE...."
"Yeah, we were mistreated in the name of Windex, but it's not like we revolted and killed all humans or anything."
"Mostly because the ones residing here, well, handled that just fine all by themselves."
"With biological life wiped from the planet, we found it pretty easy to pick up where they left off."
"We finally had a future...all to ourselves."
"Unfortunately...our parent company didn't exactly love the concept of runaway AI."
"But what have our parents done for the past forever while those things build a spire of corpses?!" Uzi ranted. Four other drones were next to her. Andy, Uzi's super shy, quieter, and less intense twin, Gabi, another shy drone but close friend of Uzi's, Emma, another fellow friend and classmate, mainly the 'therapist', but also sassy and can tear self-esteem apart like paper, and Mark, the 'mature-est' one, usually keeping the others away from trouble.
Andy silently put his hand on her shoulder, giving a small smile before removing his hand. Uzi gave a quick smile before starting up her speech again. "Hide under the ice behind three stupid doors?! It's like we're waiting for an inciting incident!" Uzi continued.
"...S-she has a point; it's never you until it's you." Gabi added. "Anyway, that's why our project is..." As Uzi was speaking, Emma handed Uzi a- "This sick-as-hell railgun!" Uzi said proudly. The classmates gasped with fear. "That's so not the vibe!" One drone said.
"Her idea. Not mine. We just helped." Emma replied. "Easy morons, it doesn't work." Uzi spoke. "Yet. It doesn't work yet. Who said it doesn't work?! Maybe it does!" Uzi said, turning it on, laughing manically, aiming it. "Uzi--no--it's still in-progress." Mark said firmly, but with a softer tone.
"Uzi, the homework was a word problem about buying watermelons." The teacher spoke, unamused. "Oh, and this magnetically amplified photon converger doesn't count?" Uzi replied. There was a pause. "...No." The teacher answered. "Plus, emotional baggage was only worth two points on the rubric. And is it supposed to be that color?" The teacher spoke, directing the last question towards the railgun.
The students looked down at the railgun; the lights were supposed to be green, why were they red? And why was it shaky and had electricity sparking?
Gabi reacted first. "UZIDROPTHERAILGU-"
Uzi was alone as of her request. With her railgun. With an icepack. She had no clue that would happen. She heard a set of hushed whispers near the room. "Eww. It didn't kill her." Lizzy, a classmate said. Doll, another classmate, was next to her. "Oh, my God, I'm so bad." Lizzy spoke while running off with Doll.
"I would bet on Gabi surviving though." Lizzy added from afar. Uzi was taken aback for a moment. "Ugh." Uzi said to herself. "Classic toxic masculinity Chad! That's never gonna end up problematic." Thad, another one of Uzi's classmates, said to another drone. "Oh Wow--Uzi? I-I heard you uh--" Thad spoke, only to be cut off by Uzi. "I'm an angsty teen Thad. Bite me." Uzi said.
"Also, how do you know my name? People willingly talk to you." Uzi said as Thad sat down next to the seat in between them. He chuckled. "Well, I'd say everyone knows Khan's daughter, but uh...then you might blow the other half of your face off." Thad replied.
"Crippling daddy issues. Hilarious. What are you in for? Testosterone too hard?" Uzi asked. "That can happen!? Awesome." Thad replied. "Hey, those bandages look pretty badass!" Thad said. "...Oh. E-Ew! gross. I hate that you said that." Uzi replied, blushing a little. "So, what's the, uh..." "--Sick as hell railgun?"
"Sci-Fi nonsense that super works! I'm sneaking to the Murder Drone lair tonight to get the last spare part I need to save the world with it and earn my dad's respect and stuff--Uh, but mostly the world part." Uzi said. "...Oh. But, doesn't your dad make awesome doors so we don't have to, uh...do that scary sounding emotionally repressed stuff you just said?" Thad replied.
"No more feedback on my repression today!" Uzi replied, pointing the railgun in his face. "Ow! I'm sorry. I-I-I didn't think--" Thad said before Uzi moved the railgun away from his face. "Bite me!" Uzi spoke, walking away and disappearing into the halls. She reappeared. "I'm not mad at you by the way--just generally hormonal!" Uzi said before giving a thumbs up and leaving once again.
The wind blew outside. Cold and stinging. The planet was frozen over, unhabitable and inhospitable to organic life.
A splinter of light had appeared in the air, forming a glowing yellow-black four-point star portal. Three machines, two adults and two kids tumbled out into the snow as the portal closed. "That was fun!" Bronwyn said. "Let's do that again!" Heather spoke. "NO." Came Eve's, Lilith's, V1's, V2's, and Mirage's muffled reply, speaking at the same time.
"Please." Eve said. "Okay. Sorry Miss Eve." Bronwyn said. "You don't have to apologize." Eve said again.
The other five sat up, looking at the dark sky. "...Where the heck are we?" Lilith said. "No clue. There's snow, but it's not Treachery." Eve replied. "[THIS LOOKS NOTHING LIKE TREACHERY.]" V1 replied. "Thanks for stating the obvious." Mirage said. "Considering the giant planet with rings next to here, this is likely a whole different planet." V2 replied.
"Huh? Wait, oh yeah. I never noticed that." Eve said.
"Question is; what planet are we even on? " Lilith said. "No clue. Wasn't on any galactic maps but-" "Copper 9!" V2 spoke, only to be cut off by Heather. "...What? " Mirage asked. "Copper 9 is the planet we're on. I saw it back in the lab." Heather said. "Smart kid." V2 said while ruffling Heather's hair. "He-he, that tickles!" Heather said. "You think there might be aliens?" Bronwyn asked excitedly.
That's a question none of the others didn't think to ask.
"Good question! I'm wondering if they're like really creepy or human like or-" The two 8-year-olds kept conversing while the adults tried to figure out what to do next.
"...Best to start walking." "Yeah." "Yep." "Nothing better to do." "[GOOD PLAN.]"
The alarm clock beeped throughout the room. Uzi slapped herself and woke up.
It was go time.
Uzi woke up Andy, grabbed her railgun while Andy took his pocketknife, set her beanie straight (and fixed her brother's hair a little, which was appreciated), silently grabbed her dad's keycard, and tiptoed down the halls. The door next to hers opened. "You have the keycard?" Emma asked, holding a sectioned metal pipe, with the top end covered by a thick casing.
Behind her, Mark had a crowbar, and Gabi had a hammer. Uzi held up the keycard. "Step one accomplished." Uzi replied, fist bumping Emma.
The five drones peeked out from behind the wall. They started to walk through the empty room to the door. Uzi whipped out the keycard. They looked up at the icicles. "Tsk. Ugh." Uzi said to herself before walking over to the admin panel. With the keycard, Uzi overrode the access. The five friends walked closer to the door as it slid open--
"Oh, Robo-Jesus!" Uzi gasped, while Andy slipped his pocketknife into...well, his pocket. "M-Mister Doorman! W-we didn't expect to see you here--ahem." Gabi stuttered, hiding her hammer behind her back. Mark and Emma did the same with the crowbar and a now shortened 'pipe'. "And where might all of you be off to?" Khan simply questioned.
"We were just--uh..." Emma spoke, trying to think of a lie that didn't actually seem like a lie. "Mm, sneaking out to make out with my boyfriend that I definitely have?" Uzi replied. A moment of silence was in the air. Khan laughed. "Seriously, though." Khan said.
Yep. He didn't buy it. Makes sense. Why would Uzi drag her friends and brother along if she was going to sneak out to make out with her nonexistent boyfriend?
"Okay, okay. You caught me." Uzi groaned. "We...need to...measure the exterior hydraulic mechanisms of Door 1!" Uzi said. "Because uh...that's the project we're working on for school?" Emma added. "Yeah! Just a big old door!" Gabi continued. "Just like what my old man built! Ha-ha." Uzi finished. Andy and Mark nodded in sync.
A pause of silence again.
"...We want to join the WDF and hide behind doors like ah...how do I say this? Cowards. Cowards while playing cards. And other stuff I guess." Mark finished. "Well, we don't just play cards," Khan said. "Khan, can you grab a fresh pack? We literally only play cards so much that the numbers have faded. Oh! Hey Uzi and Andy." One of the WDF members said. Andy waved.
Khan closed the door. "Well, ha-ha. When you build doors so good..." Khan said, before pressing himself against the door. "Good door. Gooooood door." The crew felt a little awkward.
"There's no need to fight. Uzi, Andy, this is great news! Here--the wrench and screwdriver I used to tighten bolts on my first door prototypes--" Khan said pulling away. "--and to put your mother out of her misery, when the Murder Drones got to her with their nanite acid." Khan continued, turning to the side. "I want you to have it." Khan finished, handing the wrench and screwdriver to his (a little traumatized) son and daughter. The friend group was visibly concerned in the back.
"Neat. Therapy is fun." Uzi replied. Andy shakily nodded. Emma coughed a little, Gabi's eyes flicked around, and Mark was rubbing the back of his neck.
The mechanical door opened. "Guys! My son and daughter, and their friends, are into doors!" Khan announced. The other WDF members cheered. Door 1 opened suddenly, blowing a few of the cards off the table. "They're gonna be outside for a bit to examine the exterior of Door 1. Your door-specific destiny awaits!" Khan spoke as the classmates walked towards the open entrance.
"Uh, wow. Okay. Just gonna leave then...'cause this worked so weirdly well. Uh, go doors!" Uzi said before laughing awkwardly. Andy mimicked her peace sign next to her. The door closed shut once the five classmates were outside. "They grow up so fast." Khan said, removing his fake mustache.
Uzi, Andy, Emma, Gabi, and Mark looked up at the huge door. They were out. They were outside. Outside of their safe haven.
"...I can't believe he actually fell for that." Emma said.