Chapter Text
Maybe it’s just the rum, but Lloyd swears can still feel, even taste his wedding vows on his tongue. He ruminates and agonizes about them late into the night, of staying with Alicia both in life and whatever happens after, and writing them down with sincerity in his penmanship that he hasn’t felt since making childhood promises.
He can still feel the invisible force that guided his hand across the divorce papers.
Alicia deserved better than him. Everyone told him that to his face, although most people meant it in the sense that he was significantly less attractive than her. But even beyond looks, in prowess, pedigree, and respect, she always came out on top. Alicia Termina Magentano, daughter and future leader of the Magentano family, had the looks, brains, and brawn to become a political and financial leader that would make her generational wealth appear earned.
He delivered all his promises as a doting husband would, ensuring their assets grew so they would never end up in financial ruin, running construction, repair, and renovation for public works projects, and getting along well enough for most of the Mangentano’s to come to respect him. She said she found him funny, his preferences towards luxuries and a lazy life, and yet he worked for her even when he hadn’t needed to.
They even had a joint bank account together! What says marriage more than that?
Lloyd got the life he wanted with Alicia, and she had asked to break it off with him anyways.
They had learned a lot together, apparently, and according to her, Lloyd had taught her more than anyone else could have about the world, compassion, and love. Apparently, not enough though. She didn’t say it, but Lloyd wonders if his laziness finally did him in. Or maybe, it was his clinginess and inability to shake the feeling that he was unlovable and ugly even in his soul?
And he thought he had changed so much since being a spoiled brat of a kid. Again, Lloyd Frontera didn’t get what he wanted, and again, Lloyd Frontera is whining and crying like a little bitch with a sippy cup hoping it eases his pain. In this case, the sippy cup is a bottle of wine he and Alicia only brought out for special occasions, but since it seems like they’ll never be having any of those again, now seems like as good of a time as ever.
Alicia…
Lloyd wakes up to a pounding headache and vomit on himself. It’s 6pm, and he’s fairly sure he started drinking 8pm yesterday, so however long he rested is really up to God.
Trying to stand and hopefully shower, he pathetically trips and ends up with a coffee table (whose wood Alicia herself picked up and Lloyd built!) jabbing him in the soft part of his abdomen. He has the urge to vomit again.
I don’t want to die alone.
His skin itches all over, and there’s a foul taste in his mouth. He can’t think clearly, but he knows he needs to get up and go seek help. At any and all cost, he’ll survive this, and maybe he’ll trick someone into loving him again.
Stumbling to a stand, he shuffles to the closest pile of what he knows are clean-enough clothes for people outside to just see an incredibly sad man as opposed to a straight hooligan.
As he steps out to hail a cab, the twilight evening heat makes him sweat even harder in his tailored coat, and he considers if the people in the house next to his would report and fine him for throwing up in their garbage can. Best not to risk it, he clenches his fist tightly and swallows the bile down his throat.
The driver doesn’t seem to mind the smell of vomit and alcohol on his breath, clothes, and hair. The cab smells like cigarettes, and Lloyd remembers velvet seats and personal chauffeurs with Alicia. Fuck it. Stop thinking about it.
“Magentano’s Clinic, please.” He’ll tip the driver based on whether he throws up in the car or not.
By whatever lucky grace of god there is, Lloyd’s the only walk-in at the clinic this evening. The coldness of the clinic may feel sterile, but after the summer evening humidity, Lloyd will take anything he can get.
As he steps off the welcome mat, the short nurse at the front desk sees him, immediately pales, and rushes into the back office to get her supervisor.
“Yes, just a moment, and I’ll be with you!” A small man in a white lab coat, thin as a rail with hardly any fat or muscle on his arms, turns to greet him.
As soon as he had seen who he was greeting, however, his polite smile morphs into a wholly disgusted, exhausted expression.
“Ah. Well. If it isn’t the man who disgraced my whole family and my good cousin who foolishly saw the best in you. In my clinic again.” He spins on his heel, back into the office.
“Hello, Lachiel.” Lloyd sighs, following in before plopping himself down on an empty folding chair by the examination table. If he layed down, he knew for certain the doctor would squawk and force him to sleep outside. Instead, he holds his arm out for Lachiel to examine like he has for many years now.
“Smelling of alcohol, vomit, piss, and getting what he deserves to me.” The doctor maliciously grins as he sits on a comfortable swivel chair next to him, taking his pulse and counting beneath his breath. “I hope you know I never liked you. Just putting that out there.”
“You made that pretty clear from the beginning.” Lloyd never liked him much either; respected him certainly, but Lachiel was as stubborn as he, eighty times as rich, and eternally kind. Like most people, Lachiel’s a better person than him in every regard, who put his whole soul into his work treating patients for free and creating innovative medicine. “Don’t worry, I hate you too.”
“And yet you know I’m a good enough doctor to come for your health,” Lachiel says, a stethoscope to his heart. Lloyd can read Lachiel just as well as Lachiel can read him, and he feels flayed open. “But I’m not an idiotic enough dimwit to fall for your entrepreneurial endeavors.”
“I didn’t marry Alicia for her money—“
“—our family’s money—“
“I genuinely did fall for her.” And he enjoyed their life together, with her loving him. And perhaps that was a trick, to trust so much in his own abilities and for her to trust him so quickly that they decided to share their lives with each other.
But Lloyd is a smart man, not a kind one. They parted on good terms, like a business partner closing out a deal to sell his company. That’s how he thought about it, when he smiled politely and forgave her like a professionally worded email. And maybe that was the cruelest thing he did to her.
“You did say words that were taken as vows at the wedding.” Lachiel shrugs. He leans back in his ergonomic chair (couldn’t he have gotten more comfortable folding chairs?), giving the entrepreneur a serious look. “I’d have to do a more thorough check to look, but—“ he places cold, thin fingers around Lloyd’s neck, “—based on what I know about you, you’re rapidly speeding downhill towards liver failure and ignoring what I said about not taking aspirin to alleviate hangovers.”
Lloyd feels a migraine come upon his head, and he brings his arms over his head as if to shield himself from the pain. “Yeah..okaaayyy...”
He hears the doctor walk away real quick before coming back with a bowl of medicine. “N-acetylcysteine and some zinc supplements. In this form, it’ll absorb into your body quicker, but you should get some food in your system and sleep. I’m also gonna prescribe you a diuretic because you won’t drink water no matter how many times I’ve told you to. Take it after every meal starting tomorrow morning.”
“Thanks.” He swallows the bitter concoction, and the metallic taste hardly phases him. Better than tasting vomit and regret.
“...jeez. You’re so pathetic right now I can’t even be mad at you…” Lachiel groans, “Ugh, as someone who actively dislikes you, I think you should keep wallowing in despair for my own amusement. But, as your primary care doctor, I need to tell you that you need to go cold turkey on the alcohol or you're gonna get alcohol poisoning or acute liver failure."
Not only is he a lonely, divorced loser but now he can't even drink away the pain. Someone must have cursed him in his previous life.
"Frankly, in my medical opinion, I think you need a vacation and to go on a dating app or something.”
Lloyd thinks his migraine, or perhaps his alcoholism, has accelerated to the point of auditory hallucinations. Did Lachiel miss that?
“I mean, full offense, you’re horrendously atrocious looking, and your personality is nothing short of capitalistic pig, and I don’t know what Alicia saw in you, but—“
“Okay, I get it.”
“As your doctor, you need to pull yourself together before I’ll have to, at best, pump your stomach or, at worst, replace your dying liver. This clinic has bills, and if you aren’t gonna pay me, then don’t make me do expensive procedures.” Lachiel sits back next to him, and only when Lloyd hears the tactile click-clack of the digital keyboard does he realize the doctor was dead serious. “Since you’re too cheap for a psychiatrist, you should try venting to strangers online instead.”
A cold finger slots between Lloyd’s trapezius muscles, digging right into a pressure point on his back shoulder. With a painful yelp, he sits up, and a phone is shoved in his face. An icy cyan color blows up his vision, worsening his migraine, but he reads it nevertheless.
[RP System: Meet and Match!]
[Find your ideal Romantic Partner, your Role Play fantasy, or meet Random People by building your Relationship Profile through Reputation Points! Our specialized algorithm is intended to match people via personality, goals, interests, etc. whether that be for long term relationships or hookups…Collect Reputation Points to decorate your profile, trade spirit beasts, and expand your social world!]
…Lloyd thinks he’ll find another physician in the meantime. One that’s also hopefully free.
Lachiel really isn’t helping his embarrassment, not when he’s cackling with an ugly, evil expression on his otherwise pretty face. Could Lloyd hold the fact that he snorts when he laughs over his head? Considering how Lachiel regularly cures his joint pains, probably not the best option.
“HAHA! Your face—ppffft—ugh, hooo…I needed that,” the young doctor wipes a tear from his eye and clears his throat. “Okay, haaah, so I know it sounds dumb, but according to my patients, nurses, and brother, it’s legit.”
Lloyd squints skeptically at the doctor. “…do you have one?”
Lachiel returns his gaze with a dramatic eye roll. “I have a shitty immune system, chronic fatigue, anemia, iron deficiency, and POTS. And I’m a doctor and pharmaceutical chemist. What do you think?”
“Riiight..”
“Listen Lloyd, as much as I hate to admit this…you’re a smart guy,” Lachiel sighs, placing a hand on his shoulder in some form of assurance. “Hey, for the sake of maintaining your health and what little respect I have for you, you need to think about getting your money up, and that starts with getting your pussy up. HA! ” The doctor smacks his back at the terrible joke, breaking out into a bark of schadenfreude once more.
…sometimes, Lloyd remembers Lachiel is 23, when most of the time he acts like a middle-aged man.
“Sure…whatever. I’ll consider it.”
“Great. I’ll call you a cab back home. Just get out of my office. Remember to take your diuretic. Oh, and remember to never drink ever again.”
He ends up getting scrubbed down by a nurse and forced to take a shower at the clinic, despite the doctor’s insistence that he leave as soon as possible.
His clothes are still debatably clean (and don’t smell spring-fresh), but they aren’t sticking uncomfortably to his skin anymore, and he feels a little bit less like he’s on the verge of death. When he decides to splurge a bit on Korean food for dinner, he feels like a ravenous animal basking in the glory of violence after a kill. Or, in this case, a very satisfying fullness after devouring enough food to cover missing breakfast and lunch all in the span of two minutes before heading home and straight to bed.
Alicia…
……haha, relaxation? And, a vacation? Where to?
He and Alicia had their honeymoon all around the world, given a whole summer to travel and enjoy what felt like the rest of their lives together before they’d both go back to work and their married life. And even though he’s not wallowing in self pity anymore, Lloyd still isn’t quite keen on thinking about her for a while. And frankly, when you travel around the whole world with the woman you’ve sworn your life to, and then said woman and you divorce, it’s kind of hard to go anywhere without her.
…Lloyd wants to drink.
Instead, his hand twitches towards his phone. Who does he even have to talk to? The boys at the construction site he’s overseeing? No, that’s unprofessional. His brother??? It’s kind of a loser level 100 to vent to your younger brother.
Huh. It’s like his world was all Magentano and then suddenly not.
Fuck, he’s thinking about Alicia again. There’s no way anyone he’ll ever meet will be as great as her, as beautiful as her, and somehow he completely fumbled the bag, and now he’s left without the fire and direction in his life.
When he opens his phone to hopefully crowd his mind with a new book instead of his lost love, Lloyd’s greeted with a familiar, bright cyan.
[RP System: Meet and Match!]
When did he download this app?? During my fucking shower??? How did he even know my phone and account password???? I’m going to a different doctor.
…then again, it’s not like he can’t dismiss that he’s messed up right now. Having someone, even just a one night stand, might make him feel a little less shitty. He probably won’t bag someone in Alicia’s league, but looking at his contacts list, someone’s better than no one. He needs friends.
Lloyd sighs, and out of sheer curiosity or stupidity, starts creating a profile.
Let’s see…to be completely honest, he’s extremely hesitant about putting full name down, especially since ‘Lloyd Frontera’ is probably still in the news as a senator’s divorced ex-husband. It’s been a little over two months since the initial media surge, but a quick google search would be his downfall, and the scandal would probably terminate whatever shred of kindness and respect the Magentano’s had in ever doing business with him ever again.
He settles on his birth name. The one he knew as a child, up until he was given a new alias when he came to live with his actual parents. The only ones who would know of him under this name were Alicia, those in his immediate family, and peers he met when he studied overseas for university.
[Name: Kim Suho.
Occupation: Engineer.
Age: 27]
He sets his preferences to men and women but leaves the description empty for now. What is he even supposed to put? Browsing other profiles, he cringes at the idea of labeling himself a “bottom” for all the eyes to see. Even worse, he needs to add photos…
Most of the photos he has in his camera roll he hasn’t looked at. Because they’re either of Alicia, with Alicia, or taken by Alicia. And if they aren’t of that, they’re photos of him taken by his younger employees when he’s got a particularly devious facial expression, now used as reaction images to his workplace’s Slack.
Well, most people would consider him plain at best, but he’s tolerated being called ugly after being with a genuine 11/10 goddess of a woman. At least he has a half decent, somewhat chiseled body; it pays to be an engineer who doesn’t just sit around and push paper all day.
He settles on a few pictures his employees have taken of him, mostly just because it shows off the only attractive thing people seem to think he has: his body, without the face. The face may be negligible anyway; he’s not in the mood to be recognized.
[Description: Just looking for someone to spend the night with or talk to. 0.]
…this is stupid.
After completing his initial profile, Lloyd doesn’t think much of it.
After 3 hours, Lloyd thinks he really likes this app. To his surprise, RP System is a lot less like a dating app and more like a video game. Holy shit, he really gets why people like it: not for hookups or even for meeting people but for the little guys!
As soon as his profile was completed, Lloyd answered an innocuous survey about his interests and type and afterwards, in what appeared to be a random gift box, was blessed with Ppodong.
I would die for Ppodong.
Completely ignoring the part where he needs to scroll through other peoples profiles, Lloyd finds himself immersed in playing the RP system’s version of Tetris, Bomberman, Fruit Ninja, Candy Crush and other menial phone games all in service of leveling up and taking care of Ppodong…
Thank the lord for the Nintendogs rip-off mini game. He could pet and feed Ppodong his little hamster seeds all day to touch his cute face.
He finds out for the first time, once he finally remembers that other people exist, that he can battle other profiles’ Summoned Beasts (which is what Ppodong is, apparently) using him, gaining Reputation Points, levels, and affection with Ppodong.
What the fuck is this stupid wild ant? Get dirt spat on you, idiot. Heheheh.
Lloyd’s natural instinct to min-max and optimize all his assets in a video game tell him to call it quits for the day. Even though he’s absolutely loaded with RP after just a few hours of playing, he’s running out of red sunflowers for the day, and Ppodang apparently needs to heal between battles. It’s only when he’s reviewing Ppodang’s stats that he sees it.
A DM.
Not a battle challenge, not a request for a co-player Puyo-Puyo Tetris game—a genuine DM from someone. On a dating app.
…it has to be a bot, right?
Upon opening the profile of the DM, Lloyd sees one of the most beautiful, attractive men he’s ever laid eyes on in his entire life. Silvery hair with bangs that fall perfectly into his eyes, eyelashes like long mothwings, and the body of a god. Like, Lloyd thinks his body at the very least can pass as objectively attractive, but those shoulders and his back…
[Name: Javier Asrahan
Occupation: Firefighter
Age: 26
Description: 1. Please DM me if you have a legendary Summoned Beast.]
…this is definitely a bot. Right…?
He’s seriously considering deleting the DM before reading it. Maybe this person is just trying to milk him for his credit card number. But hell, if he’s real, Lloyd would gladly just give it to him willingly.
Javier Asrahan, sent a DM request at 10:01 PM
[10:01 PM] Hello. I hope this message finds you well. I saw that you managed to get Ppodong as your first Summoned Beast. Feel free to say no, but I was wondering if you’d like to go on a date with me so that I have a chance to have my own Ppodong.
[11:21 PM] And because you have a nice body.
…bots these days sure are advanced.
Well, it’s not like Mr. Javier immediately sent a link to pay his unpaid poll taxes or whatever. Looking at Javier’s profile again—just to verify that, hopefully yes, he is a real person, Lloyd sees his profile filled with Summoned Beasts, with a sheep carrying a sword as his main character. Next to it are many, many completely butt-ugly Summoned Beasts like ants and wasps. At least the sheep is really cool.
…
Kim Suho accepted the request.
KS [12:05 AM]: crazy to hear u say that when ur back looks like that
Lloyd’s always been a pretty mediocre flirt, but if this guy’s mostly just after Ppodong, then he shouldn’t worry too much about whether he plays his cards wrong or not. He doesn’t expect an answer too soon, and yet, barely a minute later, his phone buzzes.
JA [12:06 AM]: Thank you, I work really hard on it. As do you, it appears.
JA [12:06 AM]: And I’m not just saying that because you have a legendary Summoned Beast.
Lloyd’s just a bit skeptical about whether that's truly the case or not, but it’s not every day a guy like this hits him up. He jumps out of bed, almost subconsciously, and goes to the bathroom to check his hair. Maybe brush his teeth a little.
KS [12:10 AM]: i’m not saying no to a face like that ever even if ur just after ppodong
KS [12:10 AM]: and he’s legendary? seriously? i was wondering how i kept winning all the beast battles
JA [12:11 AM]: Ppodong’s ability to use seeds to triple his attack strength and double his health makes him a deadly foe. And my Yanggeom needs a friend that isn’t another wild ant.
Ah, hottie’s a gamer. Lloyd can only imagine what drove a guy like that to suddenly download a dating app and get suckered into its monster-collecting mechanics. As he brushes his teeth, he lets his mind wander, at the thought of Javier cutely fawning over a little digital sheep.
KS [12:15 AM]: ur yanggeom is cool but how did you end up with so many ants?
JA [12:18 AM]: I really wanted Ppodong, and after a few dates or meetings with other people on RP, you have the opportunity to roll for a new Summoned Beast. You can figure out the rest from there, but if someone has the Summoned Beast you want, it’s a 50/50 as to whether you can also roll the same beast.
JA [12:19 AM]: Yanggeom is only just a master-level beast, and I am not good enough at Tetris to get him to his fullest potential.
KS [12:19 AM]: did u go on dates and hookups just to try to get Ppodong????
JA [12:20 AM]: Yes. People DM me quite often, so it wasn’t too hard.
JA [12:20 AM]: Although, I’m a bit reticent, so coffee dates are sometimes awkward.
Lloyd spits and rinses his mouth. A guy like this gets awkward on coffee dates? If he’s truly only there for Summoned Beast gambling, then Javier is a new level of shameless. Fine by Lloyd; he can play right back.
KS [12:21 AM]: u wouldn’t get many worries from me when u look like a renaissance painting
KS [12:22 AM]: and u know they say pictures are worth a thousand words 😉😉😉
JA [12:22 AM]: You’re very lucky you have a legendary Summoned Beast and very nice chest, so I won’t report you for sexual harassment yet
Lloyd actually laughs out loud reading that, cheeks flushed and chest swelling with pride. A guy like this thinks he’s attractive? Or, at least, enough to flirt with him? Unconsciously, he puffs it out a little, meeting his own eye in his reflection for once. He’s not hopeful or stupid enough to believe that lightning has struck twice on him in terms of bagging 11/10’s back to back, but if he gets to look at Javier in real life for more than 20 minutes just to trade Summoned Beasts, he’ll take what he can get.
KS [12:25 AM]: i just created my account and met ppodong u can’t do that to me man
KS [12:26 AM]: o ur just looking to use me get ppodong from me and then get my account suspended so you’ll have the only ppodong ever huh
JA [12:27 AM]: Absolutely, though I wouldn’t say no to chatting with you more at the very least.
JA [12:27 AM]: If you’re willing to chat more, tonight or tomorrow.
Lloyd still has a hard time believing Javier really is into him like that, but maybe the effect of hiding his face was more powerful than he thought. Should he wear a bag when they meet up? Well, as long as he’s wearing clean clothes and not a horrific expression, he should pass as plain enough to be tolerable.
KS [12:28 AM]: well i’m willing to do more than chat if u like but i wanna hear more about u😉
KS [12:28 AM]: like why’re u up this late
JA [12:28 AM]: Insomnia. I have very keen senses.
KS [12:29 AM]: aw man i’m sorry u have to go through that
JA [12:29 AM]: No worries, I’ll live. I’ve dealt with it for quite a while, so I’m used to it.
JA [12:29 AM]: What are you doing up this late, Suho?
…“Suho,” huh? Lloyd hasn’t been called that in half a decade. In a way, it’s horrendously nostalgic, and Lloyd can feel yearning bloom in his chest for a time and a life he doesn’t even think was objectively good. But it was his name, and it is his name now, and being called “Suho” feels a little bit like coming home. He gets back into bed, grinning at his phone like a lovesick teenager.
Also, now Lloyd knows that Javier knows how Korean names work, which is objectively attractive.
KS [12:31 AM]: first name basis huh
KS [12:31 AM]: u sure move fast, javier
JA [12:31 AM]: I figured we’re familiar enough?
KS [12:32 AM]: yeah nws man
KS [12:36 AM]: and long story short im awake bc my doctor recommended me this app and i started grinding rp after making my profile bc i like construction type puzzle games like tetris and puyo
KS [12:37 AM]: after i noticed it leveled up ppodong i just kept playing because i like ppodong and fake video game money
JA [12:37 AM]: Your doctor recommended RP system?
Specifically, his Gen Z former cousin-in-law doctor, but Javier doesn’t need to know that. Javier also doesn’t need to know that the reason it was recommended to him at all was to get him to stop being depressed and on the verge of drinking himself to death post-divorce.
KS [12:38 AM]: like i said long story short
JA [12:39 AM]: Ah, well I hope I’m not keeping you awake. I did see you work in construction, so I hope I’m not bothering your schedule
Lloyd knows he’s flushing for real. Javier must either be a really committed catfisher or just really, really interested in Ppodong to be sounding this considerate. Or, more likely, he’s trying to get some sleep and telling “Suho” to shut the hell up and stop bothering him
KS [12:40 AM]: naaaah i was having a hard time falling asleep anyways ur actually helping me, javier 😘
KS [12:41 AM]: yeah, i do have work tmr though thanks for the reminder
JA [12:42 AM]: You’re very welcome then. For the sake of your sleep and Ppodong, I believe you should log off for the day.
JA [12:44 AM]: If you stay up and keep trying to battle with Ppodong he might get grievously injured, and I won’t have any reason to DM you anymore.
JA [12:44 AM]: Just kidding. ^^
KS [12:45 AM]: at least ur upfront about using me
KS [12:45 AM]: i’ll let you do that fr more another time
JA [12:46 AM]: I won’t say no to that, but let’s arrange a date another time. Goodnight, Suho.
KS [12:46 AM]: gnite javier 😘
When he closes his phone, a sense of accomplishment and fatigue rolls over Lloyd. In the span of a day, he’s managed to barely dodge severe alcohol poisoning, ate a dinner large enough for a bear, and received a message from a hot guy on a dating app he downloaded the same day.
Even if something with Javier never turns out, he can carry the pride of talking to someone that attractive throughout the rest of the week. Nestling into his bed, he thinks he’ll wash them tomorrow, clean up his house or hire a cleaner for the day. Whatever it takes to keep feeling like a real person for just a little longer.
He manages to shove a charging cord into his phone just before passing out for the night, slipping into a dead sleep, dreaming of nothing. Not even Alicia.