Chapter Text
Ten years.
Charlie couldn’t believe that ten years had passed since he’d left Smiling Friends behind. It wasn’t his choice, not at all. Mr. Boss had called them all into a team meeting and told them the company was closing down.
He remembers Pim bursting into tears. Allan had already opened his LinkedIn and was scrolling for a new job and Glep had solemnly removed his hat.
He, himself, could not remember how he felt. Relieved? Annoyed? Scared? Sad? Mad? His life back then had been such a mess of emotions and alcohol that he didn’t remember.
Charlie would not have called himself an alcoholic but he was on the tipping point of being one.
Maybe that’s why his memory was so shot for those few years.
But after being told he was now redundant, and with a redundancy pay, Charlie had taken it upon himself to go back down South for his family’s sake for a while. It meant saying goodbye to Pim, who had seen him off at the airport.
“We’re still friends, aren’t we?” Pim had asked as he stood by him in the line to board once the call to board had gone out.
“Yeah sure dude.” Charlie recalls saying, dismissively. “We’ll see each other again when I get back.”
“When’s that?”
“I dunno.”
Pim hugged him. He remembers the hug. It had been tight and wet. Pim was crying. He waved him goodbye as he passed through the doors to board his plane and he swears he could hear him crying.
He couldn’t understand how easily Pim cried back then. Men shouldn’t cry. He wasn’t crying, least of all when the plane taxi’d away and again he swore he saw Pim at the big windows. He was waving with both arms.
Pim had called Charlie his best friend so many times.
And so many times Charlie hadn’t confirmed it. They weren’t best friends, were they? They were work colleagues. Which was why moving South to go back to his mother hadn’t been difficult, or hard.
Now it is ten years later.
His mother had passed away a few years prior. A safe, quiet, peaceful passing in her sleep and Charlie had lost himself to his grief again. He’d almost fallen back onto heavy drinking but he knew she was watching over him now.
She wouldn’t approve.
So he hadn’t.
What he had done was sell the family home and move back to America. He’d taken a few items for himself. A gold ticking clock behind a glass bell dome. Photo albums. Frames. Everything else more or less went to family or charity shops.
He returned to Philly. It’s what he knew.
Now Charlie sold hot dogs. He’d gotten a licence, a food truck, and had made a name for himself. Self employed, one employee, they ran the sports trinket. They’d drive to what big game was on that weekend, park outside, and make bank.
Hot dogs. French fries. Waffle fries. Cold drinks.
Easy money compared to how expensive the food inside those big games was. Sometimes he’d have to shut up early because he sold out of things to sell.
Charlie was happy.
He hadn’t recalled being so at ease, or happy, for a long time.
Charlie was sitting at a cafe, drinking a cup of coffee and mulling over his phone like he used to. It’s a new one, because ten years is ten years. His old phone had been crushed beneath a vehicle's wheel not a year into living down South.
He’d gotten a new one but so many of his old contacts were now lost.
It’s just how life worked.
Behind him the door opened with a ding and a short, pink woman made her way in. She was pushing a stroller with one of the chubbiest toddlers Charlie had ever seen sitting in it. He watched the woman, quietly, his expression blank.
“Hi hello, good morning!” a vague Australian accent sang from the woman whose strawberry red hair bounced as she spoke. “I’d like an apple juice and one cafe mocha please! Oh! And a slice of strawberry shortcake please."
Why was that voice familiar?
Charlie looked at the back of the woman’s head. She was incredibly short. Petite is a word one would use. He watched as she stood there but a sudden cry from the toddler in the pusher caught her attention.
She turns, now facing Charlie, as she kneels down to tend to the toddler.
Those eyes.
Big. Expressive. Oddly shaped eyes. But now they were behind thick, round rimmed glasses. She had soft lipstick on her lips and her eyelids were gently dusted with some eyeshadow.
“What is it possum?” the woman asked softly as she lifted the toddler up and out of the pusher. The little one squealed at being picked up and hugged against her shoulders, and kicked its legs.
Cute?
Cute.
But then the woman’s eyes lifted. Like she could sense somebody looking at her and the two critters locked eyes and they stared at one another for a good few seconds.
Recognition hit the woman faster than it had him.
“Charlie??” she gasped, rushing over towards him suddenly. “Charlie Dompler?”
“Whoa!” Charlie set his coffee and phone down. “H-hey! Do, do I know you?” he asks.
“Charlie,” the woman had grabbed her stroller and brought it with her. Both her, and the baby, were now staring up at him. “Charlie it’s me. I-it’s Pim.”
The name Pim was like an explosion of fireworks in Charlie’s dim head. Pim Pimling. From work. The short guy who had been given the short end of the stick with everything in his life.
A shitty family. Non-existent love life. Rotten luck. Hospital stays. Injuries. Accidents.
The last he saw him... her? It was at the airport.
He’d lost the number when his phone had been crushed and he’d never thought to seek Pim out again.
A stabbing blade went into his back and twisted itself in so deep it touched bone. What a horrible friend you were. Are?
“Dude! I mean...!” Charlie gets up from his chair and he’s the one to instigate the embrace. He wraps his arms around both Pim and the toddler, giving them both a squeeze. The toddler squeaks and kicks its legs at the sudden hug, but then erupts into giggles.
“Oh Charlie! I thought--I don’t know what I thought. It’s so good to see you!” Pim squeezed him with her only free arm before pulling back, gazing up at him with those large, emotional eyes. “You look good!”
He knew she was lying. He’d put on weight. He had more of a stubble beard than ever before. His hair was longer. He’s sure he’s got some food staining his shirt.
“Me? Nah, nah. Look at you!” he said, gesturing with a hand towards the critter. “You look amazing like, what the Hell? How’d you do that?”
It was true. Pim looked so different, not just in how she dressed. That was a cute dress she had on with an open sweater over her shoulders and arms. Were those stockings and Mary Jane shoes? And that chest! That was absolutely new and Charlie knew he was staring and he knew he had to stop but god damn.
Pim had a nice pair of tits.
“It’s called hormone therapy.” Pim replied gently before bouncing the toddler on her hip. “And this is my little angel, Lotte.”
Charlie, ten years ago, would have balked at seeing a kid so young. He’d make sure his hands were busy so no baby would wind up in them. But now? Now he kneels on one foot to get a look at the little thing.
“Lottie?” He asks.
“Lotte.” Pim corrected him.
“She looks like you.”
“I’d hope so!”
The yellow critter pauses. “Huh?”
“What?”
“Isn’t she like… adopted?” Charlie asks.
“No, she’s mine.” Pim answered. “Is that so hard to believe?”
Charlie's brain cooked a few scenarios into being. Either hormone therapy had come so far in ten years that trans women could bear their own babies or Pim had gotten a surrogate. Which one was more plausible? He didn’t know.
“No guess not. She’s cute.” Charlie reached to poke at a chubby cheek, which earned him a giggle as well as a squeak. Lotte suddenly reached her arms towards him, smiling. “Whoa hey! We just met.”
“She’s super friendly. But don’t worry if you don’t want to hold her I know-“
“Nah dude I’ll hold her.”
“Really?” Pim’s eyes sparkled like sapphires.
“Yeah. I can hold a kid.”
She’s handed over and she’s heavier than he thought she would be. Lotte giggles as she touches his face and neck, eyes wide.
“How old is she?”
“She turned one last month.” Pim smiles softly.
“Aw, you and your husband must be super proud of her.” Charlie captured a hand and bounced it gently. Cute kid.
“I don’t have a husband.”
“Oh! Wife. Sorry. Should know not to assume—“
“No wife. Just me.”
Charlie did a double take at Pim. Single? Pim? Looking cute as shit with a fine pair of tits? How did that happen? “I don’t believe you.” Charlie said.
Pim laughs as her order is called. She hurries away to grab it and returns. She smiles, looking up at him. “Sorry, you don’t what?”
“Believe you. No wife? Husband? Partner?”
“No. But what about you? Surely you have a wife and a little Charlie Jnr running around by now!” Pim smiles warmly.
“Me? Nah. I’m.” He shows her his left hand. Devoid of any ring. “Flying solo too.”
“Oh now that I find hard to believe.” She scoffed. “You? Single?”
Charlie feels his face feel warm as Lotte touches his nose. He no longer flinched at his nose being touched. “Yeah I just never had time. Or really felt it necessary. I’m not dad material.”
“Sure.” Pim replies in a tone that said she didn’t believe him at all as she sets her order on the table. She reaches for Lotte and scoops her back into her stroller, where she opens the Apple juice for her. “You were quite the Casanova at Smiling Friends. Your girlfriends and oh, what was her name?”
“…Zoe?”
“Yes! The red head! Gosh I’d forgotten her name. Oh! Can I sit?”
“Free country.”
Pim smiles as she scoots the pusher closer and sits at the small table. Charlie more than happily sits across from her. “It’s so good to see you, Charlie.” She says as she added sugar to her drink. “I… I. I don’t know. I’d thought of so many scenarios with you. If you were alive or not.”
Charlie frowned a little. “You thought I was dead?”
“For a while. You just had no digital footprint for me to track…! No YouTube or Twitter, you never gave me your email and when your phone number stopped accepting my messages I just… assumed the worst.”
Pim wouldn’t tell him how much she’d cried for him. Thinking her best friend dead. How she’d drank herself to sickness thinking he was going forever. Charlie didn’t need to know that much about her past without him.
When he’d dropped off the face of the Earth, Pim knew she’d never have another friend like him. His quirks, his mannerisms, how he handled himself. It was all so uniquely Charlie and suddenly without him around her world became a little more loud, busy, and a little scary.
Allan hadn’t stayed in touch either. He’d moved interstate, long gone only a few months after the company closed. And Glep, well. Glep was more Charlie’s friendly co-worker than Pim’s. His house was lovely, yes, and his wife too but it was all so... expensive for Pim. She always felt like she should be offering to clean something when she visited.
And Mr. Boss vanished into Brazil. She hadn’t heard a thing from him for years.
Ultimately, Pim had lost everyone.
So she sought out someone. Herself, first and foremost. It took a lot of navel gazing and looking at her life and who she was, who she was striving to be, before she realised that she had been struggling with her identity for years. When she looked at her reflection, she didn’t know who it was that stared back at her.
Not a happy critter, that’s for sure.
But now, here she was. Happy. Smiling. Wearing glasses in public. And now with her daughter sat in her pram, and Charlie? She felt beyond happy. She could kiss him. She should kiss him. On the cheek, of course. She hadn’t seen him in ten years. You don’t just throw yourself at a guy, even your long lost best friend of several years, like that.
Meanwhile Charlie again felt the twist of the knife in his back and he’s reminded what a shitty friend he had been. Why hadn’t he tried finding Pim again? He used to have her phone number memorised. Their late night text messages, the phone calls, he remembers one winter night where he was suffering the worst insomnia imaginable. Pim had come to his apartment and the two had gone on a midnight walk to the nearby park and sat on the swing and just... talked.
Nobody else did that for him.
Not before, or after.
“Ah jeeze man--sorry. Shit.”
Pim smiles. “It’s okay. You can still call me dude, if you want.”
“You’re okay with that? Dude seems kinda masculine...”
“Charlie, I'm telling you it’s okay.”
“Okay. So uh. Yeah, dude. Pim. I’m sorry. I just... i got so caught up in life and stuff happening and losing my Mum,”
“Oh no. Charlie, I'm so sorry.” She reaches out and that pink, warm hand touches him and Charlie doesn’t know how to decipher the feelings going on in his stomach. He’s going to blame the coffee. Coffee always goes right through him. “Was it recent?”
“A few years back now. It was just. Just her time.” Charlie moved his hand, the one Pim was touching and for a moment he considered linking fingers but you just don’t do that to a girl who you were best friends with for several years, then hadn’t stayed in touch with for a decade. That shit wasn’t okay. “How uh, how about your folks, are they still kicking?”
“I wouldn’t know.” Pim said with a shrug of her shoulders before going for her drink. “When I came out to them as a woman neither of them were happy. Or Amy. Or Legs. They accused me of being brainwashed by the queer propaganda or something silly like that. So I said goodbye.”
Charlie sits there for a few moments taking in what Pim just said. He knew, much like himself, Pim’s childhood hadn’t been easy. Or pleasant. Seeing that dysfunctional family at the dinner table that one day had been enough for Charlie to know exactly what kind of household Pim had come from. Not very different from his own. “So you just cut them out of your life?” he asks.
“Yes. It... sucked. It really hurt, but I knew I was better off without them. And then,” she looks down at the stroller. “Lotte came into my life and I haven’t looked back. I’m the best mummy I can be to her, and I’ll never let her experience what I did.” Pim even reaches down to stroke the top off the baby’s head.
Charlie so desperately wanted to ask if she was a surrogate or adopted. But how could adoption be the answer? She looked way too similar to Pim to be adopted. No way was there a whole bunch of babies up for adoption who had those shaped eyes.
“Well I’m glad for you. You deserve it. Being happy.” Charlie said, looking at the baby. “Both of you.”
Pim looks at him as if he’d just proposed. There’s stars in her eyes. A little bit of wetness at the corner of those large eyes too. And her smile? When has Pim ever had such a brilliant, beautiful smile? Charlie clenched a fist. “What?” he asks casually, hoping he wasn’t blushing.
“That’s one of the nicest things you’ve ever said to me.” Pim says softly, honestly.
“What? No...” Charlie felt that knife twisting even deeper. It was cutting into bone, now.
“No for real, Charlie. You know how you are. Were. I know how you were. This... gentleness? Your affirmations of my actions in my life? You’d never have spoken to me like this before. Not who I was.”
“I wasn’t that bad.” Charlie replies weakly, knowing he was.
She gave him a look and Charlie knew that she knew what he knew. He lowers his gaze.
“...sorry, Pim. For being such a--” he stopped, as he’d about to say ‘shitty’ but remembers the kid right there. “--lousy friend to you for all those years. For not even acknowledging you were my friend. My best friend.”
“It’s so hard for men to be in touch with their feelings isn’t it?” Pim asks, almost playfully, but she smiles. That lip gloss is so shiny. “But it’s okay, Charlie. We found each other! Destiny saw fit for it to happen and I’m so glad I tried this place out. I’ve never been here at all.”
“Really?”
“Really. I was taking Lotte on a nice walk, seeing new scenery, and this place seemed pretty nice! And... here you were. Are you a regular?” Pim asks, now curious.
Charlie scratched at his stubbly chin. “Hm. Kinda. I don’t come by every week or something but I’m here a few times a month.”
Pim smiled. So it was destiny. Charlie wasn’t here every day. But he was here today when she visited it and now here they are. Talking like old times. She feels her heart grow warm and the sensation is nostalgic, and familiar. It’s how she used to feel around him so long ago.
But she forces it to calm down.
“Well! That’s destiny.”
“Sure.” Charlie just let her believe in her destiny. In his opinion, nothing was predestined at all. Zodiacs. Fortune tellers. Fortune Cookies, while delicious, were pointless. But if Pim wanted to believe the stars had aligned for them to reunite like this, he’d let her.
He’d let her do anything.
Fuck.
“So what are you doing for work now? Still in the helping people smile business?” Charlie asks.
“Kind of! I’m a child therapist now.” Pim replied, lifting her drink to take a slow, careful sip as the drink was still incredibly hot. She sets the drink down. “I do call out sessions with children. Rather than take them into an office where they don’t feel safe or secure, I go to their homes. I also work with Child Protective Services. If I see the signs that the child is suffering from neglect or abuse, I get in touch with them.”
That’s what Charlie had needed when he was a kid. Somebody to witness how his uncle had treated him when he was left in his care when his parents were busy. He needed to be removed from it, as he’d been incapable of telling his parents about it. Why? Uncle Bilbert had threatened him with something worse if he talked about their rough housing.
But he smiles.
“Dude that’s... that’s great. You love kids. You love helping people. You’re really just living the life, aren’t you?” Charlie asks. Her life had swung around so much since he’d left it. Suddenly the thought that he was the reason Pim had been floundering surfaced in his mind. Was it his fault? He’d gotten her addicted to vapes during COVID. He had taken so much of her personal time up with his desire for company.
And he’d been so mean to her in the past. He’d been neglectful. He’d disrespected her so many times. He wants to ask why they were friends outside of work. Why was Pim so drawn to him? He had been quite possibly the worst friend in the whole world yet Pim always came back.
Was he the abuser? Had he become his uncle in his own, sick, twisted way and just hadn’t seen it? Was Pim his victim? Was he still a victim himself? He didn’t like any of these questions and how they swarmed in his brain like an angry beehive. Looking across at her he sees a woman who is content in herself. She’s happy. Glowing from it, practically.
She was beautiful.
Has Pim ever looked this beautiful before? This happy? He couldn’t remember.
“You look happy.” Charlie commented, quietly.
“I am happy.” Pim replied softly. “I’m happier seeing you again.” she adds.
Charlie sees that she’s blushing and he feels a warmth pool in his belly over it.
“You look happy, too.”
“Me?” Charlie asks.
“Yes...! Charlie you used to be such a way back then. You weren’t... clocked in? You were so disinterested in so many things. Including work.”
“Yeah, well... I was working through some things.” He shrugged his shoulders dismissively. “I’m better though. I’m working my own gig. Living a little cleaner... I haven’t vaped in ages.”
“That’s good.” Pim smiles warmly.
“And I haven’t really drank like I used to. Mostly cuz I can’t. I tell ya. You hit forty and your body just goes ‘yeah no let’s not do that any more’ and you gotta listen right?” Charlie asks.
Pim nods from experience. “You’re right Charlie, you are so right.”
He smiles.
“So do we like. Do you want to exchange numbers?” Charlie asks.
“You--what?” Pim looks surprised.
“You wanna stay in touch? Or just. This be it?” he adds before pausing. “I mean I would wanna see you again I wouldn’t... complain? To hear from you again.”
Pim looks like she’s going to cry. She even audibly sniffs before she pulls up her phone, case pink as ever. She unlocks it, the lock screen being a photo of herself and Lotte. Opening up her contacts she clicks on favorites and there’s Charlie. Still.
She brings it up and hits edit before handing the phone to him. “Just update your details.”
“I’m still on your phone?” Charlie asks, looking down at the number and quickly nuking his old one and replacing it with his new number.
“Of course. If I deleted you it just... felt so final. Like you were dead. Gone. And I always hung onto a slim hope that I would see you again. And today, that paid off...!” she smiles, tilting her head. “It’s silly, I know.”
“Nah dude no it’s not silly it...” it’s sweet. It’s kind. It’s caring. It’s Pim. Charlie lowers his head, hiding his eyes under his hat rim as he adds in the number and hands it back to her. He then fishes his own phone out, brings up ‘new contact’ and adds Pim’s name before offering her his phone.
He watches her put her phone number in and when the phone is handed back he suddenly holds it up. “Wait lemme get a photo so I can use it on my contacts,” he said.
“Oh! Um! I’m not--okay!”
Pim didn’t think she looked good enough for a photograph right now. Wind swept. Coffee stained lips. But she smiles a wonderful smile and Charlie snaps and quickly adds to his contact for her. He subtly favorites it.
“Thanks.” he smiles.
Pim smiles back before sighing and leaning back in her chair. “Well! This has been so wonderful but I need to be getting back. I have a session this afternoon and I need to drop Lotte off at the sitter.”
“Sitter?” Charlie asks.
“Yes, Charlie. Sitter. I don’t take her with me to client's sessions.” Pim explains as she gets up off the chair and checks on Lotte to see she’s finished her juice bottle. She sets it on the table.
“Oh well dude that. No.” Charlie shook his head.
“No?” Pim asks.
“Lemme watch her.”
“Excuse me?”
“Lemme watch her. I got so many cousins and half cousins and second cousins back home. Kids are easy.” Charlie gets up from his seat, “I can even watch her at your place so like. You don’t gotta worry about her being in my unchild safe place.”
Pim hesitated. She opens her mouth to protest but she doesn’t really see any reason to. Charlie’s offering to watch Lotte for a few hours. It would save her on sitting fees. And she knew Charlie would take good care of her. Why wouldn’t he? She was so sweet and cute and a darling.
“Are you sure?” she asks, carefully.
“Pim I’ve been the worst friend to you for so freaking long,” Charlie was still carefully watching what swear words he was allowing to slip through. “Now we find each other and you think I’m just gonna shake your hand and move along? No lemme help.”
“Do you know how to change a diaper?” Pim asks as she begins to move the stroller out of the cafe, Charlie fast behind her.
“Yeah dude! Changed a million of em.” Charlie boasted.
“For real?” Pim asks.
“For real.”
Pim laughs a little. “Well... if you’re sure. I guess... follow me home?”
God, what a phrase to hear from a cute pink woman. Charlie’s stomach feels warm again and he hopes his face isn’t turning a deeper shade of orange. He swallows. “For sure!” He could have made an adult joke. But not at Pim’s expense. Not with her daughter right there, ears keen to learn new words.
He followed her outside and this morning he swore the sky had been cloudy and grey but now... the sun was out. Birds were singing. The world felt warmer. And looking down at Pim, who was now talking down to her daughter, he could see why.
He’d missed this piece without even knowing it.
To be continued?