Chapter Text
Avery smiles, feeling the hemolymph coursing through his dorsal vessel just a little faster. Just a little. He looks at hls angel with a smile; he is beautiful in a way Avery doesn’t think he can describe.
The black feathers glisten against the setting sun, catching the golden rays, each feather individually illuminated, his profile serene, always pensive, always trying to keep Avery from seeing the cracks in the control he believes he possesses.
So selfishly, he revels in those cracks. Knowing that he is irresistible, at least in this way, gives his life a little meaning. If only he could do more, dig his claws in, press against the cracks; let Derek’s control shatter and fulfill the natural cycle of life.
Derek moves closer, wrapping his wings around him—soft feathers, like the petals Avery used to cover himself, to find warmth, to feel something. And now, the warmth is real. Avery, without a shred of shame, rubs against his side, never taking his eyes off the sun, slowly fading before them, the sky growing darker, with the stars emerging more and more.
The bird swallows, staying still for just a moment before also moving closer to the caterpillar. Avery smiles, listening to Derek’s heart beat slowly, enjoying the night, unaware of his friend’s thoughts.
Derek’s grip is growing weaker, and Avery finds himself smiling at the thought. But at the same time, he tries to keep the anguish away from his friend. A false sense of understanding—selfishness trying not to fully show itself.
Avery hopes to soon fulfill his purpose, his link in the food chain, to feel that he has done something for once. He remembers the loneliness before The King brought him here, waiting, alone, eating garbage without even knowing if he would see the day he would hatch.
And hatching would also be lonely—flying, flying far away, searching for someone, something. Unable to eat, waiting for death.
It is comforting, on the other hand, to think of being a part of someone. And not just anyone, but Derek; sweet, angelic Derek. Surviving a fate forced upon him, controlling an instinct he has barely discovered, with eyes red like a beast, with hunger trapped in his ribcage only to realize it is getting worse.
Avery can ask for nothing more than that—that Derek enjoys him, that he takes the time to savor him. Tearing at the skin roughly, licking the fluids from his body, caressing his corpse with a tenderness he has never known.
He watches as his angel smiles at him, his claws gripping the grass where they both sit almost imperceptibly. He ignores it, while thinking about how beautiful it would be, and how each time, the end draws near, and it is inevitable.
Derek loves flowers, especially lavender. He used to lie down in the fields, gazing up at the sky while listening to his mother hum a song as she gathered herbs nearby. He loved feeling the coolness of the plants tickling his skin. Sometimes he’d fall asleep. Sometimes he’d hum along, too.
His mother would always tuck a flower behind his ear, kissing him on the forehead before going back to her work. They’d return home with dirt on their shoes, but with a basket full of what nature had given them; the lavender is a reminder of a home he can never return to now.
Today he’s hungrier than ever. A gnawing hunger that grows stronger by the minute. The lavender doesn’t help. His favorite place isn’t working.
“Angel?” a soft voice asks. Derek looks up, his eyes sharp and the same red hue as the blood in his veins, watching the caterpillar that has been the cause of his delirium these past few nights. That has been the reason he feels more and more like an animal than a person.
Derek still doesn’t want to accept that he has lost his humanity; there are few things that remind him of the human he once was. But that resolve fades as he watches the caterpillar before him—the perfect prey, bright green, its face in an affectionate smile, a bouquet of lavender between its legs. What is Derek now, if not a prisoner of instinct? An animal, a beast out of control?
The bouquet of lavender on its chest provides a perfect contrast to the caterpillar’s emerald skin. He feels himself salivating at the dish before him; a small part of him is screaming, but it is drowned out by the roars of hunger he can no longer hold back.
But he stays still. Unable to move. A final shred of self-control, a fading resolve—the clear signal for the caterpillar to leave if he wants to live.
Avery, please, please.
“Derek” his wings flutter at the honeyed voice. Avery approaches with a smile, the scent of the flowers even stronger even though they’re surrounded by them. “I know you can’t control yourself anymore. I know you want to eat me.”
He laughs. A beautiful sound; he wonders if his screams will be this sweet. Derek takes a few more steps before lunging at the caterpillar, both of them falling and crushing the flowers beneath their weight. He positions himself over his prey; the animal inside him expects to see terror, to hear pleas for mercy, and to see tears streaming down the most beautiful face he has ever seen. But there is none of that—only a sincere smile, full of affection, of complicated emotions, but an acceptance he never expected to see in a prey.
Avery!
“Derek, my angel…” one of Avery’s legs reaches toward his face, grasping the metal, lifting the shield Derek had put up so no one would see the monster he has become. It falls onto the flowers. “Why were you hiding, if you are divinity itself?”
Derek can’t take his eyes off Avery; he can’t help but think about how unlucky he was to have met him, to be the misfortune of someone as wonderful as him. One of Avery’s legs grabs a sprig of lavender, moving it around and trying to tuck it behind his wings.
“It’s okay, Derek. Being a part of you would make me very happy. Being with you even when I’m no longer here…” He leans toward him, their faces close in a moment of intimacy. Avery’s breath brushes against his lips. “I don’t want to die alone. That scares me. I was so happy being with you.”
He laughs, kissing the bird’s forehead as he lies back. A redemption, an acceptance, a tacit permission for Derek… for both of them to fulfill a purpose, to follow the natural cycle of things.
Derek looks at him one last time, regaining just a little control before he feels another wave of hunger. Avery’s eyes are closed as he begins to hum. The scent of lavender floods Derek’s senses as he opens his mouth, saliva dripping, watching the caterpillar, and finally, he gives in to his own desires.
The lavender field was no longer his favorite place.