Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

2018

@justonechanceshanehollander
OH MY GOD THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER

@justonechanceshanehollander
SHANE HOLLANDER SIGHTING 

@lizziejeffries
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander
GIRL FUCK YOU

@rosiebuckley1
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander
so happy for u😒😒😒

@puckingtalkpuck247
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander
don't u live in montreal oomf? is shane hollander in montreal really news?

@justonechanceshanehollander
Responding to @puckingtalkpuck247
BITCH YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HE IS NEVER SEEN

@justonechanceshanehollander
god he is even finer in real life i'm actually salivating🤤🤤

@justonechanceshanehollander
photos do not do this man justice

@justonechanceshanehollander
i actually think his biceps are bigger than my head no joke🤤

@justonechanceshanehollander
omg he's stood next to me i'm about to die

@justonechanceshanehollander
WAIT WHAT THE FUCK AM I SEEING???????????

@justonechanceshanehollander
i just caught a glimpse of his phone screen and EUGH

@justonechanceshanehollander
i genuinely dk how to react

@justonechanceshanehollander
i love him so much but this is just weird

@justonechanceshanehollander
[3 photos attached. The first photo is a picture of Shane Hollander in the queue of a smoothie shop. He's wearing a baseball cap but the photo is a clear shot of his face. The second photo is of his phone and hands, but it's too blurry to make out the words. The last photo is zoomed in on the screen:

Lily
i am thinking

Lily
how will we celebrate my latest win?

Lily
maybe facetime😏

Lily
i will wear something special for you

Lily
maybe jersey of best player in league and nothing else😘

Me
Go fuck yourself

Me
If you're trying to turn me off its working

Me
Anyway, I don't think my jersey will fit you

Me
Also I'm not free for facetime later I'm having dinner with Rose

Lily
:(

@justonechanceshanehollander
I'M ACTUALLY DEVASTATED NO ONE TALK TO ME

@justonechanceshanehollander
i truly did not have shane hollander misogynist/asshole/cheating womanizer on my bingo card for 2017 and i'm SICK about it FUCK MY LIFE

@shanebug24
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander24
NO FUCKING WAY

@pikeanderfanatic
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander24
this has to be photoshop😓

@shanehollanderslawyer
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander24
there's so much to unpack here... i’m afraid i cannot defend u on this one sir, so all i’m gonna say is @ lily darling get urself out of this relationship STAT

@marlowlover32
Responding to @shanehollanderslawyer
literally can we just appreciate that this poor girl wanted to celebrate her win, whatever it was, with her boyfriend and she literally suggested a sexy facetime FOR HIM in HIS jersey and he responds with 'go fuck yourself'???? TRASH #GetLilyOut

@pinkmarianne
Responding to @marlowlover32
that poor girl i bet she was so upset #GetLilyOut

@cowgirlformarly
Responding to @pinkmarianne
the ‘:(‘ at the end😫😫LILY GET BEHIND ME #GetLilyOut #FreeLily

@funnypuckbunny
Responding to @marlowlover32
icl i would never recover if my man reacted like that #GetLilyOut

@liartolduthat81
Responding to @marlowlover32
also the fact that he said she was turning him off and that he doesn't think his jersey would fit?!?! like is he bodyshaming her or what???? #GetLilyOut

@pikesfifthchild
Responding to @liartolduthat81
no bc i thought the same thing. he is 100% bodyshaming her!! 

@liartolduthat81
Responding to @pikesfifthchild
how much u wanna bet she’s probably toddler sized🫠🫠🫠

@rozzyking18
Responding to @pikesfifthchild
icl it feels abusive😔

@buddie118x
Responding to @marlowlover32
HAS NO ONE NOTICED THAT HE'S BLOWING HER OFF FOR ROSE LANDRY TOO???????

@rosieposieeee
Responding to @buddie118x
leave rose out of this!!!

@buddie118x
Responding to @rosieposieee
I DIDN'T EVEN SAY ANYTHING

@rainbowmafiabitch
Responding to @rosieposieeee
sorry but rose is involved with this if she’s going for dinner with another woman’s man she ain’t shit

@rosieposieeee
Responding to @rainbowmafiabitch
i’ll fucking dox u bitch don’t test me

@buddie118x
Responding to @rainbowmafiabitch
girl save urself😭😭😭

@destielwasrealtome
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander24
omg i would be in a padded cell if my bf treated me like this #GetLilyOut

@kittyyyyy1999
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander24
sorry why are people surprised that a hockey player treats his gf like shit??? ARE Y'ALL NEW ON EARTH????

@lemaireletsgo
Responding to @kittyyyyy1999
fork found in kitchen shit fr

@boiziaubabymomma
Responding to @lemaireletsgo
literally i swear cheating is a requirement for MLH players lmao

@lesbiansforshaneh
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander24
oh so u want me to kill myself is that what ur saying?????

@shaneholenderr24
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander24
CANADA'S GOLDEN BOY SHANE HOLLANDER?!?!?!?!?!

@24kinghollzy
Responding to @shaneholenderr24
HE WAS THE ONLY GOOD ONE LEFT

@shaneholenderr24
Responding to @24kinghollzy
ig PR really does work and i fell for it😓😓😓

@shaydenlover2435
Responding to @justonechanceshanehollander
god its so clear this man is GAY

@shaydenopt
Responding to @shaydenlover2435
exactly!! this lily girl needs to get the message that shane only wants one man to wear his jersey: hayden pike😍💖🥰💛🫶

@shilyasdaughter
Responding to @shaydenopt @shaydenlover2435
my day was bad enough and then i see this tweet? just hand me the gun🤦🏼‍♀️

Trending on Twitter

Taylor Swift
Trending in New Music

1.1M tweets

Rose Landry
Trending with Shane Hollander

150.7k tweets

Wimbledon final

34.8k tweets

#ShaneHollanderIsOverParty2017
Trending with Shane Hollander Misogynistic

5,689 tweets

#GetLilyOut
Trending with #FreeLily

3,491 tweets

Mom
Shane Hollander call me this instant

Mom
I am so disappointed in you

Mom
We will be having a long discussion about this!!!

Jackie Pike
Shane Hollander you better have a damn good explanation for this shit🤬

Farah (Agent)
Shane please call me ASAP. Thanks. 

Hayden
WTF bro????

Hayden
Jackie not happy and neither am I tbh

Hayden
This is not how you treat a woman

You have [4] missed calls from Farah (Agent). 

Dad
What’s going on son?

Dad
This is not the Shane I know!

Dad
You’re better than this.

You have [9] missed calls from Farah (Agent). 

JJ
calisse bro

JJ
i thought u liked lily?

You have [15] missed calls from Farah (Agent). 

Lily
hollander are you awake

Lily
shane wake up

Lily
but do not freak out

You have [5] missed calls from Lily. 

Outgoing call to Lily

Ilya: Hello? Shane?

Shane: Fuck… fuck, Ilya, I can’t believe this is happening [panicked breathing]… FUCK!

Ilya: Shane- Shane, listen-

Shane: Fuck, Ilya, this is so bad! My mom is fucking furious with me, my dad’s disappointed, and Farah’s called me about fifteen times in the last hour and I- I don’t fucking know how to fix this-

Shane: FUCK!

Ilya: Shane-

Shane: This is my actual fucking nightmare, Ilya-

Ilya: Shane, is going to be okay. I promise, just slow down. I think you need to tell your parents about me now, da? And maybe Farah? I think she will be okay about it. 

Shane: Oh, God-

Ilya: Your parents love you, Shanya. They will not be bad about this I am sure. I think your mama will just be happy her son is not sexist pig like twitter is saying.

Shane: [breathing slowing] Yeah… [he sniffs], you’re right. I’ll call them. 

Ilya: Good. And call Farah too, da?

Shane: [sharp, determined inhale] Okay, yeah… you’re right. I need to call Farah before things get out of control. 

Ilya: You are brave, malaysh. Will be okay. 

Shane: I love you so much.

Ilya: Love you too, sweetheart. Now call Farah before things get even worse, da?

Shane: [strained laughing] I’m not sure how things could get worse but… okay. I love you. Bye.

Ilya: Love you too, sweetheart. 

@raebeaumont99
ok now people are talking about this i have a confession!! i actually kind of slept with shane hollander in 2011 and it was... not good. i gave him head and then when it was time to return the favour he literally went green in the face like he looked NAUSEOUS?!? a traumatic experience for sure🫣🫣 #GetLilyOut

@raebeaumont99
Responding to @raebeaumont99
(for people who don't believe me i have attached a photo of me and shane in the club that my friend took, a sneaky photo i got of him on my sofa when he was putting on his shoes, and then a photo of him leaving my apartment)

@inthecrease
Responding to @raebeaumont99
OMG HE HATES WOMEN ITS SO CLEAR

@ottawajessie1990
I told myself I would never discuss this publicly but I dated Shane Hollander in high school. At the time I thought he was an ok boyfriend; he bought me flowers and was pretty respectful, but looking back after seeing all these messages/tweets idk why i thought that when he literally ghosted me after he got drafted and then dumped me via text🫤also i’m not going into detail but I had many experiences similar to @raebeaumont ... lets just say he'll receive but he's not exactly a giver... 

@livvylashes
Responding to @ottawajessie1990
can i just say that a PWHL would never do this

@ilyasbubblebutt
Responding to @ottawajessie1990
another day blessed to be a roz stan😌that man is a confirmed EATERRRRRRR

@msrozanova
Responding to @ilyasbubblebutt
alexa play the giver by chappell roan👷‍♀️👷‍♀️

@ilyasbubblebutt
Responding to @msrozanova
shane hollander confirmed as a country boy quitter

@msrozanova
Responding to @ilyasbubblebutt
HOCKEY BOY QUITTER

Shane Hollander
Trending with #HockeyBoyQuitter

@katyaspirnov
i can’t believe other girls had the same experience as me with #hockeyboyquitter😔i literally spent years after insecure about my body cause i couldn’t get his 🍆 up but clearly he’s just another boy brain dead from too much porn🥴🥴🥴

Outgoing call to Mom

Yuna: Hello? Shane? [her tone is clipped]

Shane: [sounding nervous] Hey, mom. 

Yuna: Your father is here too. You’re on speaker phone, and you have some explaining to do. 

David: [sharply] You sure do. 

Shane: Um… I-

Yuna: [cutting him off] First we see those disgusting test messages with that poor girl Lily? I mean… telling her she probably wouldn’t fit in your jersey and that she’s turning you off? That’s not how a grown man acts! [scoffing] The poor girl was probably distraught thinking she’s not good enough for you! This is what happens when you young men watch too much unrealistic porn-

Shane: [sounding horrified] Mom! Please, can we not talk about… [a strangled sound escapes him] …porn, Jesus-

Yuna: [continuing] It’s true! I read articles about all these young men who don’t know what real women are supposed to look like because their brains are deformed from pornhub!

Shane: Mom!

David: Don’t interrupt your mother, Shane.

Yuna: [pointedly] Thank you, David.

Yuna: And Shane, if you can’t even say the word, I think maybe you shouldn’t be watching it-

Shane: [his voice is high with embarrassment] I don’t! 

Yuna: [harrumphing] Well, then, why am I getting phone calls from Rolex and Reebox about tweets under the ‘hashtag hockey boy quitter’ tag because you don’t know how to treat a woman in the bedroom-

David: [awkwardly] I thought I taught you better than this, son. A woman’s pleasure is just as important as yours, I told you this at sixteen we first had the birds and the bees conversation-

Shane: [choking] Oh my God, please stop! Will you guys just listen for one second?

Yuna: I don’t want to hear any excuses-

David: Don’t raise your voice at me, young man-

Shane: [he lets out a frustrated yell] Just listen to me-

Yuna: [sounding shocked] Shane!

Shane: [shouting] I’M GAY!

[the line falls silent for several beats]

Yuna: Oh… [she begins to laugh hysterically] Well, thank God for that. 

@burner7878
not to overshare on twitter but #hockeyboyquitter shane hollander forever ruined hockey for me in 2013 when i offered my tits for him to f*ck he literally ran from my apartment claiming he had food poisoning😔

Lily
how is it going

Lily
malaysh are you ok

Lily
i love you so much

Jane
I’m going to die

Lily
????????

Lily
shanya call me now

@melissaformets
my own #hockeyboyquitter story: met shane hollander in a club in 2015, took him back to my place, neither of us came🫣he actually straightened up my room afterwards… least sexy experience of my life i still have nightmares about it

Outgoing call with Lily

Lily: Shane? Hello? Are you okay?

Lily: They were not good about it?

Lily: Did you tell them about me? Is that it? 

Shane: No!

Shane: [he sighs] I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to freak you out. 

Shane: Everything’s fine, I swear. They were good about it. Really. 

[Ilya hums, sounding unconvinced.] 

Shane: Honestly. It was fine… just embarrassing. 

Ilya: [uncertainly] What?

Shane: God, Ilya, it was fucking awful [he groans]. Possibly the worst coming out in the history of the world. 

Ilya: [sounding relieved] I am sure it was not as bad as you think, Shane. You are very dramatic. 

Shane: [sarcastically] Right, so my mom shouting at me for being a sexist pig who doesn’t know what ‘real women look like’ because ‘my brain is deformed from too much porn’, and then my dad talking about [his voice raises in pitch and noise] female pleasure… that’s not bad? And then me shouting down the phone ‘I’m gay’ because they wouldn’t let me get a fucking word in, that’s not that bad? 

Ilya: [bursts out laughing]

@selenedoesyoga
i'm dying because i saw another girl say her #hockeyboyquitter story included failed orgasms and shane hollander tidying her room for her? tell me why i had this exact experience in 2014 except instead of tidying he went through my lease because i mentioned once about how my landlord was a fuckwad

Outgoing call to: Farah Jahali
Duration: 1h56m

Outgoing call to: Hayden Pike
Duration: 49m

Outgoing call to: JJ Boiziau
Duration: 12m

Mom
So

Mom
Who's this Lily?

Mom
When do we get to meet him? :)

@ShaneHollanderHockeyPlayer✔️
I have been made aware of speculation online regarding my private messages with Lily, as well as some personal encounters from my past. 

Firstly, I would like to acknowledge the very real issue of rampant sexism and misogyny, especially in hockey, and I am aware that this type of behaviour contributes to women feeling unwelcome in hockey spaces. Hockey is for everyone. 

Secondly, I would never intentionally make a woman feel unwanted or comment negatively about a woman’s body. I apologise wholeheartedly for any woman I have hurt because of my actions. 

This is not how I wanted to tell people, but by way of explaining my past behaviours, I need to tell the truth. 

I am gay, and ‘Lily’ is a man. 

I hope this provides some context for the messages in which I stated that my jersey would not fit him, and for the fact that I was having dinner with an ex-girlfriend instead of facetiming my boyfriend. 

I would like to assure people that neither me nor @RoseLandry✔️ are involved in an affair of any kind. We are nothing more than friends. 

I apologise to the women who I have hurt over the years in which I was lying to myself. You all deserved better than how I treated you, and I can only explain by stating how deep my denial truly was. 

Lastly, I am a deeply private person and so I would appreciate if in future people did not spread photographs or stories about myself. 

Thank you,

Shane Hollander

@shaydenlover
OH MY GOD I WAS RIGHT HE'S GAY

@juliebookrecs
NOT SHANE APOLOGISING FOR NOT WANTING TO EAT PUSSY BECAUSE HE’S GAY THIS IS LOWKEY SO FUCKING FUNNY

@passdatpuff
omg bless him this makes me want to cry

@tjbeth
how could people cancel this poor babygirl for being in the closet noooo i want to cry

@nyc-artist111
shane hollander going green in the face at the prospect of munching… i never thought a twink from nyc would have something in common with a professional hockey player but here we are😔😔

@shanehollanderslawyer
My formal apologies to shane for failing as his lawyer😓 in MY defence i didn’t think submitting ‘shane is too gay to eat box’ would stand up in court but apparently i’ve been proven wrong😔😔

@shaydenlover
SHAYDEN CONFIRMED IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2018

@shilyasdaughter
Responding to @shaydenlover
were you perchance dropped on your head as a child?

Hayden
Wait

Hayden
Boston Lily was a man this whole time??

Shane
Hayden I literally called you yesterday and told you I was gay?

Hayden
Oh

Hayden
Damn

Hayden
Am I stupid?? Haha

Hayden
WAIT A SECOND

2021

@therealilyarozanov✔️
now i am free to speak i would like to clear my boyfriend’s name and state for record that when you have right parts he is no quitter and is very skilled lover

#hockeyboygiver

@ShaneHollanderHockeyPlayer✔️
Responding to @therealilyarozanov✔️
ILYA DELETE THIS RIGHT NOW