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Bohemia is a fallacy in your head by SaunteringVaguelyDownwards
Fandoms: Inception (2010)
22 Jul 2013
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Arthur despairs his way through university while trying to reassure his ex-girlfriend he's not into high heels, honestly.
(He also, most certainly and under no circumstances whatsoever, does not own a diary.) -
Thorns, Sticks and Other Honey Days by EstuaryOrange
Fandoms: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
18 Oct 2013
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Summary
One year after their bonding, Spock and Jim come to visit Sarek on the Vulcan colony. It's not as simple as it's made to be.
Another companion piece to "Things the Crickets Know"
Series
- Part 3 of How I Wish You Could Tell
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The Language of Flowers by fleetwood_mouse for methylviolet10b
Fandoms: Sherlock Holmes - Arthur Conan Doyle
06 Nov 2013
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A case leaves Watson wondering about a series of strange messages he received years ago, when he believed Holmes to be dead.
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or, "5 people who couldn't handle there still being a TonyandPepper and 1 who could."
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They've discussed this before. John is sure of it.
And yet Sherlock keeps barging in on him in the shower. There's only one way this can end.
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Killian asks Emma who taught her to play darts so well. [Captain Swan, past Gremma; set post 3.16]
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Her Name in the Darkness by MistressOfMalplaquet for t0bemadeofglass
Fandoms: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies), Marvel (Comics)
05 Sep 2014
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When Loki sees the reflection of a girl with red hair in the water he leaves everything he knows to find her; perhaps it's just as well, since his world was falling apart anyway.
Pre-MCU Thor setting; Spirited Away AU - prompt fill for the amazing t0bemadeofglass who is my first blackfrost muse.
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In which the whole thing about love is kind of stupid, and in which there is the creation of a gloriously sad, dick-too-bomb creature named Connor Walsh.
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It’s funny really. How everything is going good for you until a few simple words cause your life to go spiraling into darkness. Jean and Armin knew this feeling all too well. Between bad breakups and deceased loved ones the two search for some kind of consolation and find it in the most oddest of places; each other. But here’s the problem: Jean and Armin are both male, which wouldn't be that big of an issue if Armin wasn't Jean’s teacher, several years older, and everyone around them wasn't against their potential relationship.
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Les amis monstres. One of the leading activists groups for monster rights, is full of an eclectic group of monsters, creatures, and those who study magic. This is their stories, following members of Les amis monstres, their allies—both human and creature—and those that would see them fail (namely, Patron-Minette) as they struggle to fight for the rights of all, whether they be human or monsterkind.
More tags will be added as the series progresses! Each new chapter will be a new installment following a different character.
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Sherlock’s heart is pulp.
He had never wanted to see this life stilled before his own. Yet here he stands, still drawing breath with hands too clean for the guilt lining him in lead. He stares down at his mistake.
I’m so sorry.
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Benoît acaba de mudarse a París cuando conoce a un extraño anciano que parece confundirle con un viejo amigo de sus tiempos jóvenes.
Básicamente, AU en el que Courfeyrac encuentra a un joven idéntico a cómo era Combeferre de joven. Casi sin darse cuenta, le acaba contando su historia. El chico está dispuesto a escuchar.
(ambientado en París, año 2012) -
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It's with cruel self-conviction that Arakita thinks it's somewhat typical that something so good to him could be taken away so easily. That he never did anything to deserve Fukutomi Juichi in his life anyway.
All he knows is that Fukutomi deserved to live as much as Arakita didn't deserve him at all, and maybe that's what makes the kaijus truly evil. They take the loved, the needed, and spare the excess to flounder without them.
For three years Arakita feels as though he's living by biological standards alone, a broken machine with a missing part; a gaping, festering space where it used to reside, just as useless as he once was.
On his twenty-third birthday, he meets Kinjou Shingo.
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Guns 'N Roses Vol II (No Rest For The Wicked) by PAPERSK1N
Fandoms: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
12 Apr 2015
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A few months after the Fake AH Crew parted, and Michael already needs help. Gavin is convinced Lindsay is out there, and won't rest until he learns the truth.
What starts as some innocent searching suddenly turns deadly serious, and with their own shady pasts being dragged up left right and center, and the crew-mates can't help but long for the simplicity they faced pulling off a simple heist.
A.K.A
Guns N' Roses 2: The Quest for Lindsay Tuggey
Series
- Part 2 of Guns 'N Roses
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Summary
Clarke just can't seem to give her new neighbor a good impression- always causing her grief in one way or another (though most of those problems would go away if Lexa just kept her door locked-but where's the fun in that?)
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To Court a Monster: Fast and the Furious Edition by Rhiw
Fandoms: The Fast and the Furious (2001), Fast and the Furious Series
15 Oct 2017
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After having mated with the first Dominant of his race he met, young Submissive Brian O'Conner is trying his damnest to escape his mistakes. But his past won't let him; the cub growing in his stomach ensures as much. Even hidden amongst the millions of LA, his kind still somehow manages to find him. And it seems nothing he says or do will convince Dominic Toretto to ignore him - and the interest of a Dominant is the last thing he wants.
Series
- Part 2 of Roux-verse
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The Ghosts of Our Old Loves by fleetwood_mouse for CherryBlossomTide
Fandoms: Sherlock (TV)
27 May 2015
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John asks Sherlock not to use his middle name in the toast. For once, Sherlock listens—and so he doesn’t solve the crime or see the signs, John doesn’t save the life, and Mary's pregnancy goes unnoticed. But the world keeps turning.
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out tonight by QueenWithABeeThrone
Fandoms: Rent - Larson, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Daredevil (TV)
28 Jun 2015
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"This is Mark!" "And Roger!" "Leave a message!"
"You still haven't changed that? Jesus, Mark. Anyway, this is Claire."
Or: c'est la vie boheme. Claire and her surviving family communicate through voicemail.
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What God Has Joined by WishingStar
Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe
30 Jul 2015
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Summary
And Sarah's heart breaks a little, right then, because that tone, that stiffness in his posture—her cherry-tree-honest little boy is hiding something and the prospect of her figuring it out, it frightens him. Oh, Steve.
Series
- Part 2 of Flare
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until the night turns by orphan_account
Fandoms: 終わりのセラフ | Owari no Seraph | Seraph of the End
02 Aug 2015
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It's always been a matter of life and death, of choices and consequences and mistakes, for Guren Ichinose. Shinya Hiiragi is one mistake that in the end, he would make again and again.
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“Thrice.”
“Yes.”
John blinks. Shakes his head. Blinks again. “Thhhhrice.”
“Yes.”
Is my mouth moving right n- “Thrice in your entire life?”
“Yess, John,” Sherlock growls, hissing like a snake grabbed by the tail. “Thrice, three times, twice more than once and once more than twice, a veritable triptych of onanism. Thrice.”
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Dave doesn't survive the game. Davesprite does. When Sburb's endgame door sends the kids to a reset Earth, Davesprite finds himself restored as the Default Dave because Sburb doesn't care about anyone's survivor's guilt.
Series
- Part 1 of All in Good Time
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Don't Threaten Me with a Good Time by OverlyObsessed223
Fandoms: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
12 Sep 2020
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“Besides, as I said earlier, Luther is capable of defending himself,” Five adds. “This is Number One we’re talking about. There are very few people on this planet who aren’t able to be crushed with his fists.”
“You think I don’t know that?” Klaus snaps, and it’s not until Five’s eyes narrow and Diego’s eyebrows furrow that he realizes he’s said too much.
Series
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- English
- Words:
- 6,227
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 54
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Bookmarked by TakeThyBeak
17 Sep 2020
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Post-Alt-Season One if the Apocalypse was averted. The siblings are all staying close together and trying to work things out between them, and things are going okay. Then Klaus finds out from his siblings that Luther went out to a club alone and he and Ben are panicking--the one time that happened before, Luther got angry and used his powers when he shouldn't have and hurt Klaus, and acted completely irresponsibly--and none of the others get it when Klaus insists he's going to go find him. Diego and Five follow to accompany him (really most likely to keep Klaus sober and in case Klaus was right about the Commission still being out there). Along their journey searching for Luther, a lot of secrets come out that paint a terrifyingly accurate picture of everything that Klaus went through that night with Luther before (first the violence on his person from Luther, and then eventually the fight and maybe-sorta-brief-stint-into-death at the nightclub). Five and Diego are furious (and protective), and after collecting a drunk Luther and shoving him in the car, they tell Klaus there's GOING to be a family meeting tomorrow, and he WILL go into full detail.
Really nice seeing Diego and Five get all angry and protective on Klaus' behalf.
> Don't Threaten Me with a Good Time by OverlyObsessed223
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Of Bias and Bravery by Mintoki
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
17 Aug 2020
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"It’s not that his peers are inherently cruel to the Quirkless. Izuku firmly believes that, if the truth ever got out to his classmates, they would still welcome him with open arms. At the same time though, acceptance does not necessarily mean they are well-informed on the subject. His classmates might be well-intentioned, but sometimes the words that come out of their mouths cut deeper than even he could have ever expected."
OR
In which Izuku possesses the words and knowledge to try and correct his classmate's misguided beliefs concerning Quirkless people, but actually communicating them is another challenge altogether.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,553
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 72
- Comments:
- 760
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- 17,642
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- 3,922
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Bookmarked by Discount_Emo
19 Oct 2020
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Yay!!!
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Sheriff Steve Rogers falls for the new guy in town (and for the adorable boy he has with him), but when Tony's secret catches up with them, will his love be enough to save them all?
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Neal is never lost for words. So when the experienced CI freezes up during an undercover operation, Peter rushes to his rescue. What he finds is a glimpse into Neal’s past, and he unearths dark secrets from a time in prison Neal had long kept hidden.
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the farmer's son by parkrstark
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Iron Man (Movies), Captain America (Movies), Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
14 Sep 2021
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Harley took the job on Tony's farm because he didn't mind a little hard work, and he needed the money. Despite that, between the heat and long hours, there were times when he felt seconds from quitting. That was until Tony's omega son, Peter, came home from college. Then, he loved his job.
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little bit of me, little bit of you by Potrix
Fandoms: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel
12 Apr 2018
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Bucky looks up, and for one terrifying moment, before Stark acknowledges the kid, too, he thinks his programming is acting up again, making him hallucinate.
Because right there, gym bag slung over his shoulder, and a bicycle helmet tucked under his arm, stands a boy who looks so much like Bucky remembers himself looking almost a century ago, that Bucky has the sudden, hysterical urge to pinch himself to make sure he isn’t dreaming.
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Two Deans, one Cas - it's not as sexy as it sounds
Or
An ethics lesson from Hell
Or
The one where Dean from the past meets Dean in the present. They're not sure they like each other very much.
Series
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With You by FoggyGlasses
Fandoms: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan, 進撃！巨人中学校 | Shingeki! Kyojin Chuugakkou | Attack on Titan: Junior High
18 May 2022
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In the warm Summer breeze, Levi is helping clean out old documents from Erwin's office. When faced with papers he can't read, Levi goes to the commander for help. After a short lesson with lots of encouragement, both men are reluctant to leave each other's comfort. The gentle sunlight leaves them reveling in each other's love.
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Batman's Not So Little Family by Raven_WitchTales
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Justice League - All Media Types
17 Jun 2024
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For a man that says he "works alone," he sure has a lot of partners. Doesn't mean most people know that though. And he'd prefer it stay that way.
It all starts with a minor mission in Bludhaven with Green Arrow and the Flash, where they get some help from Nightwing, a local vigilante they've grown to trust after a few prior occasions, although they didn't really know him personally. But, there's one person in the league who does. However it turns out he's amongst the few who hadn't gotten Nightwing's help on a League mission. So it was a bit of a shock to hear that his son was in the med-bay of their very much secret base. He's not as discreet as he'd have hoped.
And from there...they all just pile on.
Series
- Part 1 of My Batfamily Fics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 53,539
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Comments:
- 602
- Kudos:
- 6,684
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- 1,169
- Hits:
- 156,199
Bookmarked by silver_wolf1249
24 Nov 2022
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last chap w the arrowbat mention and jl losng their minds top tier content
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Hard Time by Moomin_94 for pepperwood
Fandoms: Bridgerton Series - Julia Quinn, Bridgerton (TV)
15 Oct 2023
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She let herself smile at him, as though she was pleasantly surprised to see him standing in her office instead of dreading it. “Anty, this is a surprise, it’s been a long time.”
He gaped at her, swallowing convulsively several times before he spoke. “I didn’t realise you were - I thought your father -“
“Oh, No.” Kate clicked her tongue, “Lung cancer got him a while ago.” She gestured to the cigarette still smoking in her hand as his eyes fell on it more than a little glibly, “And I know, I said I’d never become my father, but you became yours and I thought: What the hell?”OR
Anthony and Kate met and fell in love when they were teenagers, with plans to run away together and the stage seemed set. Until Edmund Bridgerton's body was found in a alleyway with Tharman Sharma sprinting away from the scene
OR
The Rival Crime family AU no one wants to see
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The Nightmares Encouraged Them To Take A Peek by Mangled_Sushi
Fandoms: 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs
04 Nov 2025
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Atsushi's been having nightmares about his time with Shibusawa, and the ADA starts to notice. Cue the ADA trying to figure it out like the detectives they are! (This is FULL of plot convenience, my friends. I know Ranpo would be able to figure it out in less than 30 seconds lmao)
Atsushi needs more recognition that he's literally traumatized. So, here's my badly written, multi chapter, fic about it! I hope y'all like it (it's a-okay if you don't though)!
Sorry this part took so long to come out!
Edits made on Sept. 14-17, 2023: Hey, y'all...so I edited this again lol. Although, this time I'm going through all the chapters and fixing them and adding more story. So...yeah. ;D
(Currently: have gotten through Chapters 1-6!!!)
Edited on Feb. 23, 2024: Finally edited chapter 6! Now I can move on with this dang story wooooo!
Series
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In Love With Justice by PlotsOfCoffee
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Justice League - All Media Types, DCU (Comics)
07 Mar 2023
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Batman is notorious for his secretive ways, so when the Justice League meets someone he associates with, they naturally have questions. The questions continue to pile up when it’s clear that Batman is rather. . . close to him.
Or the Justice League thinks Batman and Nightwing are dating.
Series
- Part 1 of DC Fics
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Sam chalked it up to habit. He figured, despite the friction between them, Dean was still bound by childhood instincts. Some things he could override, especially when he wanted Sam dead, but some things remained under all circumstances. So, when Sam woke up in the middle of the night and bolted for the toilet, it really shouldn’t have surprised him that after a mere ten seconds of retching, his hair was being pulled back.
Bookmarked by ravenonawire
22 Feb 2024
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Dean shook him a little. “Come on, look at me, man.”
“How?” Sam ground the word out in a stifled scream, eyes locked on Dean’s chest. “How am I supposed to look at you after everything I’ve done?” He tried to stop screaming, pushing back the tears and the swelling in his chest. “I can’t even look at myself, Dean; how am I supposed to look at you?”
Sam flinched back again, feeling one of Dean’s hands cupping his cheek, and while he didn’t let the hand pull his head up, he did lean into it.
“Sammy, just look at me. Come on, it’s—it’s me. You can always look at me.”
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He just curled up, weeping like a child, and pressed himself into Dean’s side.
“I’m sorry.”
“I forgive you, okay? I forgive you.”
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“You listen to me, Sam Winchester.” Dean took a deep breath, speaking slowly and clearly. “I will always forgive you. Maybe I’m angry, and maybe I’m betrayed. But you are my brother.” He gave Sam a shake. “Mine.” He thumbed away the moisture on the flushed face in his hands. “I would never give up on you, Sam, and it kills me that you don’t know that. That you didn’t hear those words and immediately realize something was wrong.”
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“But Dean—”
“I love you. You know that, right?”
Sam swallowed hard and nodded. “Yeah. I—I know that.” His eyes started to burn. “I love you, too. I know I’ve screwed things up, but I do love you. I’ll always love you.”
Dean smiled and stepped into the motel room, motioning for Sam to follow him. Hesitant, Sam shuffled after his brother, and they made their way over to Sam’s bed.
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Sherlock wakes up to the sound of John arguing with his sister. Sherlock has never been the one to properly comfort someone, but in this situation, it comes naturally.
Bookmarked by JaJaJa3510
13 Apr 2024
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Sherlock wakes up to the sound of John arguing with his sister.
Sherlock has never been the one to properly comfort someone, but in this situation, it comes naturally.
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...hi
(Chapter titles are from Richard Siken poems and every chapter will have CW in the end notes, please read them if you need)
Bookmarked by ravenonawire
26 May 2024
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1
He’s brave enough to do what no one in Heaven would be brave enough to even think of doing, and instead of allowing him his last request they pull him back to his life, to his family, so he can torture himself by torturing them. Eternally being punished for his crime of being born. He doesn’t mind, not really. He just hates that they keep dragging Dean into his mess.
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So why, when he glances over at Dean where he resides on the couch with his head in his hands and his shoulders rigid with stress, does Sam turn back to the ghost with a helpless frown on his face, begging him to say again that none of this was real, that he needn’t worry about Dean’s feelings for he didn’t really have any.
2
So there they are, two brothers trying their best to pretend they’re completely fine while the other is well aware it’s utter horseshit, and they both know that they both know, and they’re both silently judging the other for hiding their real mood while simultaneously doing the same thing themselves.
Sometimes Sam thinks that they’re both real stupid pieces of shit. This is one of those times.
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“No Dean, what if she’s right? What if all that damage that he did to my soul that Cass and Balthazar and Death told us about can’t ever be healed, or even stop bleeding? What if no matter how many times some celestial being rebuilds me from scratch, my soul stays as damaged as he left it? What if all I ever am is Satan’s broken toy that got thrown away? A toy so broken that even he doesn’t want it anymore, and it shouldn’t be an insult but it is, and maybe that’s just a symptom of the damage.”
By the time Sam’s done talking Dean has his head back against the mattress again and looks even more exhausted than Sam feels, and he feels guilty for doing this again.
“You’re not. You’re not , and you never were. I know you don’t believe me, that’s okay. I’m gonna tell you anyway, because maybe one of these days I’ll have said it enough.” Dean lifts his head to look at Sam, making sure to hold his gaze.
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Sam has grown to expect Dean’s intense speeches and declarations of support since their return to the Cage last year, but it still feels like his world starts spinning in the opposite direction every time he does it. He sometimes feels that with just the power of his big brother saying the things he’s always wanted someone to say to him, maybe he could finally stop bleeding.
“I know. I know that, I just… just get in my own head sometimes, I guess.” Sam pulls his hand out from behind his back, trusting now that he won’t try to bleed the Devil out of himself for the time being, and Dean watches the movement with a satisfied smirk.
“I know. That’s why you’ve got me to come and get you out.” Dean nudges Sam with his shoulder the way he used to when they were still young and in one piece, and Sam huffs out a weak chuckle, wondering what he did to deserve Dean’s faith and unable to come up with anything.
4
Dean just tries to ignore the monotony of it all. This shouldn’t be routine. He shouldn’t be well practiced in coaxing his barely sentient brother into allowing him to repair his bloody hand.
It shouldn’t be such an old habit that he finds it more effort to remember which faucet is for hot and which for cold in his own bathroom. So much of this shouldn’t be what it is. So much he’d give anything to redo, to rewrite.
8
At least one of them was shaking for most of that and Sam’s pretty sure it wasn’t him. Then there are hands on his face and Dean is giving him that really intense big brother face.
“You have never, ever caused damage to my life, do you hear me? And there is no god damned universe where I would wish that. You are the most important thing in my life, okay? The most important fucking thing . Tell me you know that, Sammy.” Dean practically begs, holding onto Sam like he was the only liferaft in an endless ocean.
Sam just stares at him for a long moment, arguing between two very long held truths. Believing undyingly that he is a burden and causes nothing but harm to those he cares about versus having unwavering faith in his brother.
“I know.” Sam whispers, reaching up to grab Dean’s wrists. Dean holds onto him for a moment longer, some ancient, tortured grief twisting his features and making Sam’s stomach hurt.
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Dean meanwhile doesn’t sleep a wink, sitting up the entire night between Sam and the door, a barrier between his brother and the realities of the outside of this room. What Dean wouldn’t give to just bundle Sam up in his arms and scream no, mine, go away at the world, keeping Sam in fucking bubble wrap in the bunker for the rest of his life if he had to.
What he wouldn’t fucking give.
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Tags
Summary
Every time they're back here, Dean reassesses.
Bookmarked by ravenonawire
21 Oct 2024
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Dad could've raised them in a normal life. Sam could've stayed with his family instead of going to school. Dean could've wrapped his little brother in bubble wrap and kept him tied up in the back seat of the Impala, and the hunt still would have found them.
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Even though they were clearly fighting to stay open, he still gave Dean a hard look full of meaning. You get some sleep, too. Eat something. And stop worrying.
“I will if you will,” Dean said pointedly.
The corner of Sam's mouth twitched, and his eyes sank shut. His breath fanned against the hand Dean still hovered by his face.
From the corner of Dean's eye, he saw Sam's hand twitch again. He sat back down in the chair and slid two fingers under Sam's palm. His brother's long fingers curled in to trap him there, like they had since Sam was a baby.
Yeah, okay. One-handed, Dean shoved and slid the heavy chair until it was parallel to the bed so he could sit back and not dislodge Sam's grip. Maybe he would get a little sleep, too. Save the thinking for later. Next time, next room.
Sam's grip tightened in sleep, and that was the last thing Dean knew before he dropped off, too.
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Summer, Taiyang, Raven, and Qrow would normally never stay at a place as disgustingly Atlesian as this. Unfortunately, it's nearly midnight and they don't have time to find another hotel to—hey wait a second, is that a fucking kid?
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“You’re telling me Mr. Up-at-five-for-my-morning-run, Mr. Rabbit Food, Mr—uh, Mr. Kale-fucking-smoothie— that guy is sucking this crap into his lungs and I’m not supposed to ask questions?”
“Don’t bullshit me, Dean. You’ve been smoking since you could ride a bike.”
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The Winchesters have always been chain smokers to me. It started with John with Dean not far behind, and Sammy refusing to touch the stuff. But when Dean comes back from Hell and sees Sam has picked up the habit too, he keeps pushing until Sam explains himself. And gets much more than he bargained for.Series
- Part 1 of two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl
Bookmarked by ravenonawire
10 Feb 2025
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It wasn’t until Dean died that Sam started the habit. The motel rooms smelled too clean, too bare. A tattered, half-finished pack of Lucky Strikes was stuffed into the (right) pocket of Dean’s old leather jacket—or was it John’s again, now that his son was rotting in the ground? How does ownership work when the only people who cared about a thing are dead? If there was no one around to wear it?
Maybe it was Sam’s now. Even the thought itself felt wrong.
But neatly folded and gone-cold on the bed beside him, it felt like a crushing black pit now.
Like everything he’d lost all rolled up into one.
Don’t be like me, Sammy.
What if he wanted to be? What if he missed his brother—his anchor to the earth—so much that he’d do anything to feel like he was there again. In the stale air of the room, with the sad Winchester family heirloom sitting just to his right, Dean felt more dead than he ever had. Even when Sam had had his gravedirt fresh on his hands.
These damn things’ll kill ya.
Let them. Fucking let them. What did it matter anymore?
So he fished the lighter out of his pocket and lit one. The smoke stung his lungs and made his breath sputter and gag—something Dean would have given him shit about if he were there—but when Sam closed his eyes and took a breath of the smoke lingering in the quiet, still air, suddenly he didn’t feel so alone.
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Dean sat down on the edge of the bed just to the left of Sam who didn’t even blink at the sudden proximity. Dean always stayed closer now than he had before the hellhounds had dragged him away. Sam settled more easily when he did, even if he’d never say it. Sammy got antsy when Dean was out of reach, in a way he hadn’t since they were young.
“We were always together, man. Your room was my room, your car was my car. And I know you never smoked inside, but…”
Sam’s voice got thinner until he trailed off completely. Took another drink from the bottle in his hand; the bottle Dean should have taken away from him half an hour ago. But he hadn’t. Knowing what Sam had kept hidden all this time was more important than being a good brother. For now.
“…everything always smelt like Lucky Strikes anyways.” Sam’s mouth did that thin-lipped quirk it always did when he was annoyed. Annoyed at himself probably, for liking it. For needing it. For bearing his soul to his brother damn near against his will.
Dean smiled bitterly. It had been the same way with their dad. You could always tell when he came around because the air smelled like Luckies.
“And then…And then one day it didn’t anymore.”
His voice had reached a pitch Dean recognized on instinct; Sam was crying.
“E-Even your bag—your clothes—stopped smelling like it.”
Dean swallowed hard, something electric burning through his chest. He had no response for learning Sam had put his face into Dean’s duffel bag and huffed, searching for the smell of him after he was dead. More than once it seemed.
-
“You did good.” His right hand still gripping Sam’s knee, Dean turned, and reached over with his left to catch Sam’s cheek and hold it in his palm. It was wet. “You did fuckin’ perfect. You hear me?”
Sam’s face scrunched up and he leaned his head into Dean’s palm, turning into it as he cried harder. Sammy needed him closer.
“Fuck this—”
Dean abandoned his seat beside Sam on the bed in favor of crouching on a single bent knee before him. He took Sam’s face in both his hands and brought their foreheads together. Sam’s tears started running down Dean’s chin.
“It’s alright, Sammy. You hear me? M’not mad," one of Dean's hands was running over Sam's hair on instinct, soothing, "You’re still here, and that’s what matters. That’s what’s always mattered.”
Sam allowed himself to cry against his brother’s skin only for a moment. He pulled sharply away and his head fell back in a thin bark of a laugh.
“Y’know, part of me hoped you’d haunt my ass for it.” he slurred, voice light like he was telling some juicy secret. Not heavy as a stone the way it hit Dean’s chest, “That I’d see you scowling with your arms crossed outside the Gas N’ Sip every time I walked out.”
-
Sam must have truly been wasted because he puffed his smoke up to the ceiling with abandon, in open defiance of god and the posted motel rules.
-
When enough time had passed that Sam was pretty sure—really pretty sure—that this wasn’t some bullshit Mystery Spot illusion, that it really was his Dean, alive and well, Sam switched to Marlboro Reds.