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“Would you like to explain why you’re watching pornography? In your bookshop? During business hours?”
Aziraphale flaps his hand, typically dismissive of any criticisms of his abysmal business practices. “Did you know I’ve been on this earth for nearly 6 millennia and have never engaged in intercourse before?”
Crowley grinds his teeth and feels his cheeks heat. What is he supposed to say to that?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,746
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 470
- Kudos:
- 3,841
- Bookmarks:
- 585
- Hits:
- 47,395
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
26 Jun 2026
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"There was something else I was going to ask you," Aziraphale continued, unabashed. "Ah… How to put it?" He tapped his hand on his thigh for a moment, and then apparently found inspiration. "Ah! When you're…" Crowley made the mistake of making eye contact with him, and Aziraphale gave him another outrageous wink. "Dining out… What cutlery do you prefer to use?"
"I'm sorry?" Crowley said pleasantly, trying his best not to cause anything in the dining room to catch aflame in his frustration.
Aziraphale gave him a reproachful stare, as if Crowley were being very stupid. "When you're eating, Crowley. Do you favour the… The knife?" Aziraphale actually glanced conspicuously at his own crotch, and Crowley considered leaving the dining room via the nearest window. "Or the spoon?" Another raised eyebrow. "Or even, let's say, a fork?"
"What the fuck is the fork in this situation?" Crowley hissed through gritted teeth.
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Aziraphale mentions that he'd like to have sex with Crowley. Crowley is completely taken-aback, and very conflicted, and very interested. Aziraphale is also trying to kill him by using elaborate food metaphors to explain the whole subject, which is not helping in the slightest.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,913
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 351
- Kudos:
- 4,642
- Bookmarks:
- 909
- Hits:
- 52,460
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
24 Jun 2026
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The Bentley has been Crowley's faithful companion for nearly a century. It's never let him down before. But after Aziraphale leaves for Heaven, it keeps interfering with his attempts to get laid.
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
13 Jun 2026
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Crowley folded his newspaper and accepted, with grim resignation, that he would have to try and save the world. It wasn’t that he particularly wanted to do it again; the first time had been bad enough and he’d needed an eleven-year-old to do the hard bit. He didn’t feel any kind of great love towards all living things at the moment, or have any heroic feelings. He simply knew that nobody else would do it.
And Aziraphale, who had stumbled his way into the centre of it all, would be trying desperately not to let it happen and failing, because Heaven wouldn’t let him succeed. One more time, and he resolved that it would be the very last time, Crowley would have to fix things for him.
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Crowley goes on a road trip across America to delay the Second Coming. Aziraphale tries to teach angels about humanity. In between, they talk.Bookmarked by deletedlamb
12 Jun 2026
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Celestial Bodies by Justkeeptrekkin
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
12 Sep 2019
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The year is 1923. Aziraphale's friends at the gentlemen's club invite him for a weekend away in Devon. He asks Crowley to join. It gets very silly and very messy very quickly.
That's just how things were in the roaring twenties.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 48,090
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 728
- Kudos:
- 1,823
- Bookmarks:
- 550
- Hits:
- 20,619
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
02 Jun 2026
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Lay me down in Eden by caricari
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
06 Jan 2021
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Two supernatural entities go for a walk and Crowley gets more than he bargained for.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,100
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 125
- Kudos:
- 830
- Bookmarks:
- 210
- Hits:
- 7,650
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
26 May 2026
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A Firelord Never Kisses and Tells by thenerdyindividual
Fandoms: Avatar: The Last Airbender (Cartoon 2005)
02 Jul 2024
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Zuko and Katara realize that not only did they both kiss Jet, but Jet was both of their first kisses. To save herself from the embarrassment, Katara makes Zuko promise never to tell Sokka about it. Unfortunately for both of them, Sokka is more observant than either of them thought, and he will stop at nothing to figure out what his sister and his boyfriend are hiding from him.
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
28 Apr 2026
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Campfire Stories from Camp Boomerang by them_fatale_11
Fandom Avatar: The Last Airbender (Cartoon 2005)
23 Jul 2026
Summary
A Zukka summer camp AU that took on a life of its own.
Fics can be enjoyed separately but will be best when read in order. Strong recommend on at least reading “Heaven is not Fit” first. But you do you!
Titles from Hozier songs because no one does horny and sacrilegious like Hozier.
- Words:
- 180,874
- Works:
- 6
- Bookmarks:
- 52
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
24 Apr 2026
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how to survive your hot best friend (a study in failure) by SyciaraLynx for briesideoranges
Fandoms: Avatar: The Last Airbender (Cartoon 2005)
24 May 2024
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It is a horrible realization to have, that perhaps Zuko hadn’t thought this entirely through.
Because Sokka is everywhere.
He is in council, he is in the palace, in the barracks, the merchant yards, the gardens. He is bouldering his way into Zuko’s rooms without a second glance at the guards and dragging him out to go sightseeing, to go to the markets, to lay in the sand and watch the stars.
He is everywhere, and he is beautiful.
Or: Zuko asks his friend to come to the Fire Nation as a new council member, and struggles to survive under these conditions.
Series
- Part 1 of Druk and the Softka Parent Trap
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,434
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 94
- Kudos:
- 1,489
- Bookmarks:
- 267
- Hits:
- 16,521
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
24 Apr 2026
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The Guy grunted. He screwed up his face against Sydney’s summer sun streaming in through the window, pressed his palms to his eyes, and then shook out his hair. His eyes blinked open, slow mo, lashes batting.
“Oh hey, so you’re Zuko?” He yawned, then grinned. He had a fucking accent. Zuko was gonna bite something apart. “I’m Sokka. I’ll be the top to your lion bottom.”
Sifu Piandao has called in an old student of his to help pull this year’s lion dance together, after Zuko’s usual partner Aang took off to “find himself” in Nepal. Zuko’s worked with Piandao for years, he’s a professional. No matter how annoying the new guy is, he’s going to keep it together for the sake of the festivities, and not at all get distracted by his partner’s… assets.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,062
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 143
- Kudos:
- 731
- Bookmarks:
- 157
- Hits:
- 7,706
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
22 Apr 2026
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In Infinite Combinations by athena_crikey
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 魔道祖师 | Módào Zǔshī (Cartoon)
23 Dec 2025
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Summary
“Wow,” says Wei Ying, and his mouth tastes funny and the air tastes funny but that isn’t really relevant right now. “You are incredibly beautiful. I mean. Just – so stunning. Impossibly gorgeous. Has anyone told you that? Where are you from? Wanna get a drink? With you, I’d spring for Saurian brandy.”
“Talk less,” says the gorgeous beauty above him, and shoves a hypospray into his arm.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,111
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Comments:
- 283
- Kudos:
- 1,166
- Bookmarks:
- 302
- Hits:
- 12,404
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
25 Feb 2026
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make me a suit so I can get it off by clancularia
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
25 Aug 2024
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Summary
“I, um,” Wei Ying could think of absolutely nothing to say. Her heart was racing and her breaths were coming faster. What had she been saying before? Oh right. “Your name?”
“What will you give me for it?” the woman asked softly, leaning over so she was in Wei Ying’s space, but still not touching her.
“What?” Wei Ying asked, confused and, oh fuck, turned on? Was she getting tingly from talking to someone in a public bathroom?
“You’ve asked me for my name twice, now,” the woman said, and her deep voice sent shivers down Wei Ying’s spine. “What will you give me in return?”
___
Or: Wei Ying discovers she's extremely gay for a stranger she meets at a bar. Lan Zhan discovers an obsession with Wei Ying's ass.
Series
- Part 1 of get it off
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
14 Feb 2026
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Summary
Suddenly, it snaps into place. The weary way Lan Zhan has been holding himself is suddenly cast in a new, much more distressing light. Somebody is responsible for it, a real live, horrible, blind, stupid person. The combination of guilt, sadness, and anger that sets in all at once is hard to contain. Lingering wisps of resentment that remain from the night-hunt flock to him, like calling to like.
All four boys stare at him with wide eyes.
“Wei-qianbei,” Sizhui says. “You look...um…”
“Scary,” Zizhen breathes, beaming.
“Who has rejected Lan Zhan?” Wei Wuxian asks.
Or; during one of his visits to the Cloud Recesses, the juniors strike a blow to Wei Wuxian's certainty that his feelings for Lan Wangji are one-sided.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,358
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 638
- Kudos:
- 10,295
- Bookmarks:
- 1,969
- Hits:
- 87,836
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
20 Jan 2026
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i will be soft in your heart by martyrsdaughter
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
01 Sep 2020
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Summary
"You've been sitting on this," he said, "for five years? A little warning would be nice!"
Sizhui's responding look was somehow both wicked and absolutely serene. Jingyi saw some of Zewu-Jun in it, which made him just... unfair. Unjust! Ridiculous! So attractive he once again wondered why he'd ever been invited to this relationship. Zizhen was there for moral support, obviously, and because he was too sweet to resist. Jingyi offered little of that.
"I didn't think you were unaware," Sizhui pointed out, as though he were merely reminding him of a pressing appointment. "After our last visit to Koi Tower, did you not ask me to, quote, 'fuck you until you forgot what Jin Ling's forearms look like'?"
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,068
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 136
- Kudos:
- 1,586
- Bookmarks:
- 293
- Hits:
- 13,464
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
04 Jan 2026
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Meeting from a thousand miles away by Spodumene for azurewaxwing
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
10 Jul 2021
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Summary
Wherever you go, there you are. It's all about who goes with you.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 25,000
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 368
- Kudos:
- 2,073
- Bookmarks:
- 553
- Hits:
- 20,185
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
19 Dec 2025
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the earthquake in the room by phnelt for antiphrastic
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
12 Feb 2022
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Summary
"Pop some bread in the toaster for me?” Wei Ying asks. Lan Zhan has one, a chrome thing with dials and buttons.
A pause. “This isn’t a relationship,” Lan Zhan says.
Wei Ying blinks. It’s such an incongruous thing to say. At first his brain says, that must be code. It’s almost like listening to two spies talk in a drama. The handler would say something like ‘the duck swims at midnight,’ and the spy would say, ‘purple is the loveliest colour’ and they’d both nod to each other and know that the prime minister was about to be assassinated, or something. That’s all he can think of, at first. Because of course this isn’t a relationship? This was a fun night. So Lan Zhan must be saying this for a reason. There’s some response he’s supposed to make now, but he’s lost the script if he ever had it.
“Okay…” he says. Then it clicks. Lan Zhan means: you should leave.
---
Maybe Wei Ying shouldn't have hooked up with his hot neighbour two days into his exchange semester, but everyone makes choices in life.Series
- Part 1 of Lan Zhan vs the Jiang Siblings
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 39,017
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 327
- Kudos:
- 5,605
- Bookmarks:
- 1,375
- Hits:
- 62,687
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
20 Dec 2025
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Always Light My Way by cqlorphan for spookykingdomstarlight
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
17 Jul 2021
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Lan Wangji looks down at his own hands, steadying himself. It is easier to think clearly when he is not looking into Wei Wuxian’s eyes. He takes the scroll from his pouch.
“Research has uncovered a method,” he says. He does not mention the forbidden nature of said research, nor does he elaborate on the method itself. He will not venture to speak it aloud. He hands the scroll over.
Wei Wuxian looks at him for a long moment as he takes it, and Lan Wangji holds his breath, waiting for him to decide. Waiting to see if he is at least interested enough in the possibility of a new core to read it.
He is. He does. Lan Wangji might be relieved, if not for what comes next.
Lan Wangji offers to help Wei Wuxian develop a new golden core via dual cultivation. He struggles to keep his feelings in check.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,472
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 380
- Kudos:
- 5,343
- Bookmarks:
- 1,380
- Hits:
- 69,794
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
15 Dec 2025
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Con Fuoco by vesna (mrsronweasley) for callunavulgari
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
10 Jul 2022
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Summary
"The infamous Lan Zhan! I knew it was you." The man next to him gives a brilliant smile, then leans his head on his hand in a casual display of comfort. Lan Zhan feels his back straighten and clenches his jaw.
Wei Ying.
They have never met, but they seem to know all about one another. Brought up in similar circles, just in different cities, they had both risen to fame at roughly the same time. They both play first violin in their respective orchestras. They're both considered young virtuosos.
Lan Zhan cannot stand Wei Ying.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 25,217
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 128
- Kudos:
- 2,427
- Bookmarks:
- 504
- Hits:
- 18,844
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
05 Dec 2025
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to be far from the stars by tothewillofthepeople
Fandoms: Star Trek, Star Trek: The Original Series
10 Mar 2025
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Spock has made a grievous error. He has rebuffed and rebuked Jim’s friendship—worse, his very nature—at every turn since Jim’s ascendancy to captain of the Enterprise. And now that Jim has withdrawn, now that Jim has given up, Spock has finally realized the value of what was being offered.
A 2025 Philon Award nominee!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 19,576
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 191
- Kudos:
- 784
- Bookmarks:
- 234
- Hits:
- 5,888
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
29 Sep 2025
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The appointed place by Moreta1848
Fandoms: Star Trek: The Original Series, Star Trek, Star Trek: Strange New Worlds (TV)
26 Aug 2025
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Summary
T'Pring lowered her voice, though no one stood near enough to overhear. "I find you very attractive," she said. "With Spock's permission, I would invite you to our marriage bed tonight." She glanced up at him, though she did not need to. The bond told her everything. Which was fortunate, as his face was like stone.
"To your—are you propositioning me, Miss T'Pring?" Kirk stammered, shocked.
"My apologies, Captain." Spock looked down at her reprovingly. "I do not know what assumptions T'Pring has made about human customs."
"Certainly if human customs are opposed, I would never presume," said T'Pring. "But Vulcans occasionally find such arrangements logical and I believe Spock would be willing. My apologies if I have proposed it in too forward a manner."
Bookmarked by deletedlamb
16 Sep 2025