Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

As Diego drives through the gate, the dilapidated exterior of the Hargreeves mansion gives way to a cobblestoned driveway, curving around towards the garage. From Lila’s view out the passenger seat window, the disarray on this side seems less abandoned-urban-decay and more home-makeover, with piles of construction materials scattered around the backyard.

Diego parks the van in the driveway, and they walk in through the garage, Lila releasing his hand to rummage in her purse for her lip gloss. This family get-together had been planned to coincide with Viktor’s weeklong visit to help Luther supervise some of the more involved renovations. Diego had immediately latched onto the idea, a little too enthusiastically. No kids, he had insisted. Lila’s parents were watching all three, leaving Diego and Lila free for the whole night. She even abandoned her usual sweatpants for the occasion, sporting a black skirt and a dark long-sleeved top.

Luther had been making real progress on fixing this place up. Some parts of the mansion are still uninhabitable, obvious to Lila as they make their way around rooms blocked off with hanging plastic. Tonight, however, for the first time the central living room appears fully decorated, and downright cozy. Luther shares Reginald’s affinity for old antiques, but leans more into found treasures and a mismatched, eclectic style. Lots of creaky wooden furniture, rugs with busy designs, and maximalist mixing of floral and animal prints on comfy throw pillows. Reginald’s stuffy atmosphere had been replaced by something warmer, more welcoming.

Allison and Klaus are setting up a board game together on the coffee table, while Viktor works to uncork a bottle of wine. Luther emerges carrying a tray of appetizers, skewers of chicken satay and feta honey bites wrapped in phyllo pastry that Lila recognizes from the freezer aisle. Not that she’s judging, those are some of her favorites.

“You’re here! Great!” Luther enthuses. “Sit down, sit down, we were just about to play a game of… what is it called again?”

“Lords of Vegas,” Klaus drawls. “It’s like monopoly but without any explicit reference to, well, you know… any particular monocled oligarch we know.”

Viktor finally gets the cork out with a low pop. “Wine? It’s red, a blend I think.”

Lila accepts a glass gracefully, but Diego is antsy. “Got anything stronger?”

Luther nods to the restored bar off to the side. “I’m slowly getting it stocked. Nothing top shelf like Dad had, but enough to make some basic cocktails. Help yourself.” He turns to Lila, “Canapé?”

“Absolutely, the feta bites are my favorite.” Lila grabs two, and Luther beams.

“Score!” Diego exclaims, grabbing a bottle of tequila from the cabinet. “We’re doing shots later.”

“Lovely. Just don’t black out or puke in the car,” Lila teases.

“Babe, on Wanda? I would never,” Diego gives her suggestive smile, and she mirrors it back to him, stopping herself from rolling her eyes at the last second. He’s trying.

Allison waves them over, “Now that everyone’s here, let’s get started. I think I’ve got this set up right…”

Everyone? Five isn’t coming then. Lila should be relieved. She could just enjoy the evening now. No need to dwell on that uncomfortable guilty feeling, gnawing around the edges of her awareness.

“What about Cinco?” Diego asks. The gnawing intensifies.

“He said he might come later, but who knows? He’s always working these days,” answers Allison. “Anyways I don’t think board games are really his thing.”

The group settles around the board, getting easily distracted from learning the rules and letting the gameplay get more chaotic as their attention wanders. Klaus takes ages mulling over his options on his turns, giving Lila and Allison time to catch up. Claire is in driving lessons, already. Lila can’t imagine putting Gracie behind a wheel with every idiot driver on the road.

Diego and Luther give up after the first few turns and decide to go out to the courtyard to partake in some knife-throwing, taking the tequila with them. Alcohol and knives, what could go wrong? Not that Lila has the moral high ground to judge anyone’s risky behavior these days.

The game further devolves as Klaus starts to pry into Viktor’s latest relationship drama. Turns out, Viktor’s love life is an epic shitshow.

This is the first time in years Lila has seen Viktor without a long drive hanging over his head. He’s visibly relaxed, openly sharing personal details rather than deflecting. Allison cautiously suggests desperately needed practical dating advice, while Klaus draws tarot cards to inspire his own random interjections. It’s nice to see Viktor and Allison getting along again. Lila wishes she could freeze this moment and just bask in the feeling of belonging. Of having a real family.

Of course, it’s only a matter of time before one of her own fuckups comes back to haunt her. She knows she was never cut out for a normal life. And, given her recent track record, she doesn’t exactly deserve one.

A doorbell rings, as if on cue. Allison is puzzled, “Luther installed a doorbell?” as Klaus yells, “It’s unlocked!”

Five emerges from the entry hall, dressed in his usual impeccable suit, hair just a little disheveled. “Sorry I’m late, did I miss anything?”

“Only Viktor regaling us with his escapades,” Klaus divulges. “Did you know he managed to have two different, consecutive one-night stands, with roommates, never even realizing he was going back to the same apartment?” he continues over Viktor’s protests trying to clarify.

Five grabs a seat across from Lila, scans the board. “Who’s winning?” He casually glances at her, flashing a look down towards her bare legs, then turns to Allison.

Lila promptly gets up. “I need a glass of water. Anyone want anything?” The siblings mostly decline, except Five, who pauses to contemplate his answer. No way she’s waiting for whatever weird request he comes up with. She turns away and exits towards the kitchen.

When she returns, the group has somehow scattered, board game abandoned. Allison can be heard from the dining room, arguing into her phone about the hours of some new project. Viktor has disappeared, perhaps to join the others in the courtyard. Klaus is still lying on the couch, absorbed in pulling tarot cards and wistfully monologuing to himself.

Five gets up as Lila joins them, greeting her with a nod.

“Is the game over then?” She asks the room, turning away from Five.

“That appears to be the case,” Five observes.

Klaus holds up a tarot card, waggles it towards Five. “The Hermit?” Klaus clutches the card dramatically to his chest. “I wonder who that’s about.”

Five rolls his eyes. “Okay, time to find a drink.” He heads to the bar, “I know where Luther keeps the good stuff.”

Klaus turns onto his back and pulls another card, hovering it above his face, “High priestess, and she’s reversed.” He laments, “Repressed feelings, in this family? Not exactly a shock.”

Lila shudders. Enough with the tarot. She’s not repressed. She made a mistake, one time, and it’s over. They were just caught up in the excitement of that night, neither acting like themselves.

It never meant anything, so there’s really no point in tip-toeing around it. Might as well just talk to Five and break the tension. Rip the band-aid off, you know?

Lila hops up onto a chair at the bar, where Five has just produced a tumbler and a bottle of whisky. She reaches past Five to grab his whiskey just as he finishes pouring it. He raises his hands out of her way to avoid a spill, then exhales, exasperated.

Lila grins at him over the glass as she raises it to her lips. A warm smile breaks out on his face as he pours himself a second glass.

“It’s been a while,” he says casually, eyes meeting hers.

Her mind flashes back to the last time they locked eyes, weeks ago. He was gazing up at her while she writhed his lap. He tightly gripped her ass, positioning her. Then his gaze broke, as he tilted his head back against the headboard and closed his eyes…

She glances aside, taking a bigger sip of whisky than she intended. It stings on the way down, and she holds back a cough by sheer force of will.

She tries to match his tone, but her throat still burns, making her voice huskier. “Yeah. Hard to get the whole family’s schedules to mesh.” She swallows again. “Allison said you’ve been working a lot.”

“Well, you know. It does keep me busy…” He takes her in, obviously amused by her struggle to maintain composure. He leans in, lowering his voice, “You look nice. You wouldn’t be trying to impress me, would you?”

“Hardly,” she scoffs, voice finally clearer. She crosses her legs. “I forgot you were even coming.”

Five moves closer as if to whisper in her ear, but faces away from her as he says, “Now we both know that isn’t true.” She hates how easily he sees through her. How it leaves her exposed.

He grabs a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and gives her a knowing smile. Then he raises his voice to direct at Klaus, “Lila and I are going out for a smoke, want to join?”

“No, that’s okay, you two go without me.” Klaus answers dreamily. He rolls onto his side away from them, gathering his robe around himself more closely as he grumbles something about second-hand smoke.

Five grabs Lila’s hand, firmly. She starts to protest, but what can she say? Refusing to go with him would make it weird. She follows him out of the room, through the foyer and down the hall. Instead of continuing to the courtyard, however, Five doubles back and pulls her up the stairway.

“What are you doing?” she whisper-shouts, scanning her peripheral.

“Quiet.” He admonishes, eyes fixed ahead on the stairs, hand firmly on her wrist. She helplessly follows, trying to keep her steps light as she ascends behind him.

When they get to the second floor, finally safely out of sight, Lila roughly yanks out of his grasp. “I’m not your bloody dog you can lead around on a leash.”

“Lila, I wouldn’t dare think of you like that,” he says with mock politeness, eyebrows raised. “Just offering a little plausible deniability.”

She shakes her head. This isn’t a game. Time to go back downstairs.

If only she could just get her feet to move.

Five’s eyes flicker down to her lips. “I know you’re thinking about that night.” He’s really perfecting that smolder. “I am too.”

Her heartrate picks up. “Wrong. I’m leaving.”

“Lie to yourself all you want.” The corners of his mouth tighten into a smug half-smile as he tilts his head to the side.

Okay, now she’s pissed. “You know what your problem is, Five?”

“Really hoping you’ll tell me,” he responds sarcastically, but he leans in, his body language egging her on.

“You think you’re better than everyone else. You’re not.” Self-important prick. “One roll in the hay with you didn’t end the world for me.” If Lila can’t get herself to leave, at least she’ll stand her ground.

“I don’t think I’m better than everyone else.” He invades her space, grabs her hips, whispers this last part into her ear, “I know I am.” He draws her closer, presses a kiss into her hair. “Stay.”

Lila knows she should be offended, but she can feel his breath, and her resolve starts to melt. Can’t have that.

“Never.” She answers, shoving his chest forcefully. Five stumbles back, laughing under his breath.

Suddenly, without really deciding to, she steps forward and grabs him. The impulse carries her further and she pulls him in for an abrupt kiss.

He takes her reversal in stride, deepening the kiss and pulling her close with one hand at the small of her back. She took the bait, and now she’s completely ensnared. Why fight it?

“Where?” Lila gasps against his cheek as he kisses along her jawline and down her neck.

He mumbles into her sensitive skin, “my old bedroom, one more floor up.” He pulls away, grabs her hand, lightly this time, and then she’s eagerly following him up another flight of stairs. As soon as they reach the landing and before her brain has fully caught up, he’s holding her again. Like he knows he can’t leave her any time for second thoughts.

They stumble into his room together. Five breaks away and quietly shuts the door, turning the lock. Immediately, as if magnetic, they draw together again.

“Here, the bed,” he suggests, moving them deeper inside. Lila gamely complies, plopping down on the clean comforter and dangling her legs over the sides. Five shrugs off his suit jacket and deposits it on a nearby armchair, giving Lila a moment to catch her breath and take in the room.

“Luther’s put together a proper guest room for you, Five.” Lila lays back spreads her arms wide. She can feel his eyes on her midriff where her shirt rides up. “I guess you’re the favorite sibling then.”

“I’ve just been staying over lately. We had a few late nights investigating Sloane’s whereabouts,” he explains as he sits next to her on the bed.

Luther hadn’t mentioned Sloane in years. Lila didn’t realize Five was still actively helping search for her. Maybe that’s why Luther had been doing so well lately.

Something in Lila’s chest sinks, and her eyes find the door.

Five interrupts the half-baked escape plan by turning her face back towards him for a kiss. His hands are firm, he smells amazing, and she’s desperate for a distraction right about now. She returns the kiss urgently, forcing herself not to process the full implications of the colossal mistake they’re making.

He breaks away to kiss along her neck and across her collarbone. “Careful,” Lila says breathlessly. His lips are gentle, but still, she can’t have him leaving marks for his bother to find.

“I know.” He continues down, meeting the neckline of her shirt, then lower.

She knows she should tell him to stop. Snogging is one thing, but going further while her husband is somewhere downstairs? That’s too far. Too much like the manic life she meant to leave behind in another timeline.

But some part of it seems to have followed her here, and she can’t bring herself to reject it. She aches for it.

Five hitches up her skirt and takes off her thong, tossing it aside. He leans down, pressing kisses to her thighs and exploring her folds with his fingers. Pushing one inside. “You’re already so wet” he murmurs, and she rolls her hips against his hand.

Five places a kiss directly on her clit, and the intense feeling causes her hips to jump up. He holds his lips in place until she relaxes back down, then starts working in earnest with his tongue. Pleasure floods through her, and she grinds against his mouth, chasing the high.

Just like last time, he meets her every move, sucking and then dragging his tongue over the area, heightening the sensation. He’s focusing carefully on her gasps and moans, adjusting and keeping his attention exactly where she wants it. It’s like he’s reading her mind.

For weeks, she hasn’t been able to stop fantasizing about this. Now she’s forced to admit to herself that it wasn’t a fluke, that her memory hadn’t embellished a thing. She’s living it again, and he’s just as good as she remembers.

Five puts a second finger inside her, curling them both forward to hit some extra nerve endings. Fuck, that is working, she can feel the tension coiling in her lower belly.

He curls and uncurls, then starts to pump his fingers in and out, and she can feel more of her own wetness getting everywhere. He pauses. “Lila, you’re gushing,” he says in amazement.

“Shut up and get your tongue back on my clit.”

“Yea, on it,” he says, which, great, because the old man is working miracles with his tongue, but there was something in his voice she can’t quite place. He sucks in again, slow pressure rolling between his lips, and whatever suspicious thought Lila was having suddenly evaporates.

Five cups her ass and pulls her closer to his face. She feels wetness dripping further down as he spreads open her cheeks. With his right hand, he smears more of her slickness there, then down around the rim of her other hole, circling the outside, the new sensation prompting her to give a small jerk. He pauses. “You good?” he asks gently.

God, yes. “I’m fine, don’t stop, I’m getting close,” she orders.

Five smirks and turns his attention back to her clit while his finger teases the rim of her asshole. Now, this isn’t what happened last time. He’s going off script. He presses against the tight entrance, meeting resistance.

And, frustratingly, he pauses again, scanning her face to check in on her reaction. “Relax,” he says, returning his mouth to her before she can tell him off for stopping.

“I’m… I’m trying,” she mumbles out through heavy panting, and as soon as she gets her muscles to loosen, Five pushes inside.

“Jesus, fuck!” Lila yelps. All her nerve endings are on fire. She grabs the pillow from behind her and puts it over her face to muffle her own noises. Thank God they’re on the third floor. “What the fuck? Don’t stop, whatever you do, don’t fucking stop.”

He obeys, working at her clit and pumping the tip of his finger slowly in her ass. Lila feels her legs make quick little trembles. She’s gasping and babbling about how good it feels. And she’s completely giving away how much he’s unraveling her, but then restraint has never really been her thing. Finally, she cries out his name.

Five responds, moaning into her clit, and the vibrating sensation pushes her over the edge. She sobs into the pillow through waves of pleasure, her legs shaking and hips bucking against his face.

He lifts his eyes to hers as she’s coming down. “I knew you couldn’t resist me.” His self-satisfied smile shows off his dimples.

So fucking egotistical. But when he moves up beside her, she relaxes her head onto his arm. Still a little light-headed, Lila admits, “God, you’re good at that.”

Five exhales a casual, “Yeah, I know,” but she catches his face sincerely glowing at the compliment as he pulls her a little closer. They share another slow kiss, and she can taste herself on his lips.

It’s not enough. She craves feeling his chest against hers, skin on skin. She fiddles with the buttons on his shirt, following her impulses and awash in afterglow.

He catches her hands in his. Shakes his head, “Not now.”

What? They aren’t going to…? Lila frowns.

Five kisses her forehead, then stands up, “No time.” He straightens his tie and fixes his collar. “If we’re gone too long, they’ll start to wonder.” He seems to be enjoying leaving her disoriented, wanting more. “Next time.”

There won’t be a next time. Tell him. Instead, Lila scooches to the side of the bed to sit again. She looks up at Five, wanting desperately for him to lean down, kiss her, touch her again.

“But what about you?” she asks. Maybe an appeal to fairness will work on him.

 “I can wait.” His eyes wander over her. “I want more time, enough to do it right,” he smirks.

God, that smug face. “Never going to happen,” she says firmly. She wishes it didn’t sound so much like she was trying to convince herself.

He closes the distance between them and brushes his left hand though her hair. Her eyes flutter closed at the contact. He smooths down her tussled locks, erasing the evidence that just moments ago she was arching her back and moaning his name. His gaze softens as he moves to cup her cheek, “It already did happen, love.”

Her stomach flips. “Don’t.” She’s trying not to lean into his palm, restraining herself from nuzzling him like a damn kitten. It’s just the endorphins, she tells herself.

“Don’t what?” He drags his thumb across her lower lip.

Her lips part, “Don’t look at me like that,” then she catches his thumb between her teeth. Don’t call me that.

Five takes a deep breath and looks up toward the ceiling, gathering his composure. Then he exhales and turns away. He picks up his suit jacket and ruffles through its pockets, producing the pack of cigarettes and lighter, then drags open the window.

“We were supposed to be going for a smoke. Gotta get the details right.” Ever dedicated to maintaining his cover. He leans on the radiator and holds up the pack, nods for her to come over.

Lila smooths down her skirt and gets up, trying to steady her legs against residual shaking.

He offers her one, “I hear they calm the nerves.”

She rolls her eyes, “Just give me a light, will you?” She brings the cigarette to her lips and leans on the sill next to him. Five holds the lighter up, and she sucks in as he flicks open the flame.

Lila turns around and faces out the window, leaning on the sill and trying to keep the smoke out of the house. She hears Five’s lighter click again from behind, then he turns to join her.

After a few drags in silence, she feels more composed. Enough for the guilt to start seeping in, heavy and rancid. “That’s probably enough, the smoke smell is getting in my hair.”

Five sighs regretfully, “Yeah.”

She turns to him, “Five, we can’t keep—”

He cuts her off. “We don’t have time for this. Let’s go back downstairs.” He puts out his mostly unsmoked cigarette.

Lila is tempted to argue, but he’s right. The sooner they get out of here, the better. She snuffs out her own on the windowsill, leaving black ash on the baby-blue paint as she turns to leave.

“One sec,” says Five, as he’s pulling on his suit jacket. He walks around to the other side of the bed, then ducks down. “Might want these back,” he says with amusement, as he holds up her lacey knickers.

“Toss them to me, will you?” Lila says it with a joking pout, trying to take away his upper hand. Five obliges, and she catches them in mid-air. She steps into them, efficient and practical, though she can feel his eyes on her. Once her outfit is back in place, she flashes him a quick smile over her shoulder.

“Let’s go down separately, yeah? I have to stop in the little girl’s room anyways.” She forces her voice to be light and casual, but she can feel the guilt flooding in, threatening to drown her any second. She needs to get away from him, now.

“Right. Makes sense,” He says to her back as she swiftly unlocks and disappears through the door. “See you down there…” he offers as an awkward goodbye. His words trail behind her as she bolts down the stairs.

Whatever that was, for the rest of the night, it’s nothing, Five thinks. He has to stay calm and collected. Any stray thought, any strong feeling, bury it. Cover that shit with concrete.

When Five makes it back to the living room, Klaus is still at it with the tarot cards, now speculating about Allison’s career prospects. Five has no idea why Allison is entertaining this nonsense. Still, he grabs his whisky from the bar and settles next to them into an armchair with a view of the foyer.

Lila emerges a minute later, not long enough delayed to be out of place. He gives her a quick once-over, noting that she’s overall put together, if a bit flushed. She sits down next to Klaus, relaxing into the loveseat.

Klaus inhales. “I know they’re awful for you, but sometimes I just miss cigarettes so much.” His shoulders follow his heavy exhale downwards.

“I know, kitten” Lila comforts him. “Honestly, they are satisfying.” A grin ghosts around the edge of her mouth as she adds, “For a second, at least. But it doesn’t last.” She gives a dismissive shrug. Five catches the jab and shoots her an indulging smile.

Diego and Luther barrel in together next, with Viktor not far behind. Luther is blaming the wind for his poor showing in their knife-throwing competition, while Diego lectures him on proper form.

Diego’s face lights up when he sees Five, “Cinco, you made it!” Five’s stomach sinks. Concrete, he thinks, and returns a friendly nod to Diego.

Klaus gives Five a look from the side, while Allison asks, puzzled, “Didn’t you already see him? He and Lila were just outside with you.”

“No, we went out through the garage,” Five covers smoothly. “A lot less likely to get stabbed with a flying knife that way.” Lila nods along, as if bored.

Diego shrugs and grabs a feta bite off the nearby tray, pops it into his mouth.

“Yo, Luther. You got anything more to eat besides these tiny appetizer things?”

“Not really.” He gives a shrug. “We could order pizza.”

Lila’s face lights up. “That sounds divine. I’m starving”

I’ll bet you are, Five thinks. But he notices Diego resting his hand on Lila’s shoulder. Five takes a sip of his whisky, keeping his expression neutral.

Viktor chimes in, “Yea I could go for some pizza. I’m good with anything.”

“Pepperoni and mushroom?” Five offers nonchalantly.

“As long as it’s not Hawaiian,” insists Klaus, giving Luther a knowing nod, while Allison suggests a vegetarian option.

Luther promises to get a good spread, then disappears into the dining room to make the call.

The dining room is under active construction, so they all stay in the living room for dinner. Pizza boxes sit open on the bar, paired with paper plates and an assortment of beer. They eat gathered around the coffee table again. Five tried to avoid sitting next to Lila, and unfortunately ended up directly across from her and Diego while they share the loveseat. Not his ideal seating arrangement, but nothing he can’t handle.

Diego finishes off another slice and leans back to put his arm around Lila. Her shoulders tense ever so slightly before she exhales and relaxes, leaning into him.

Five refocuses on what Viktor is saying. “Maybe someone can help me talk Luther out of a state-of-the art gym like the Sparrows had. It’s actually affordable if we instead just set up a few small training rooms downstairs. We can even stock up on some weights. And one treadmill.”

Diego releases Lila to lean forward. “Luther, you think we’re all going to work out together at the same time or something? Come on man, we have lives now.” He relaxes back and puts his hand on Lila’s bare thigh. Lila looks down at it, then steals a glance toward Five. He keeps his eyes carefully trained on Luther, ignoring how his palms suddenly feel sweaty.

As Luther continues describing renovation plans, Five forces himself to ignore Lila’s legs. To pretend Diego’s hand wasn’t occupying territory that, about an hour ago, Five had been claiming for himself.

Viktor begins explaining how unnecessary a rooftop pool would be while Lila nurses her beer. Diego’s hand moves up, closer to the hem of her skirt. Five considers how much longer he has to stay before his departure won’t raise any suspicions.  

“And we’re hoping to get the last bedroom ready for Ben to use in a few weeks,” Luther adds.

Five snaps his attention back to the conversation. “What?”

Allison helpfully steps in. “Yeah, Ben might get out early for good behavior. The hearing went well, but nothing is set in stone yet.”

Five blinks. How had he missed this?

 “Would Ben even want to stay with you? I mean, he kind of hates us,” Diego wonders aloud.

Five mulls it over. “If his accounts were all frozen, he might not have much of a choice…”

“Unless he rekindles his old SparrowBit connections” Klaus offers. “Maybe flees the country.”

Luther scrunches his face, clearly disliking the disruption of his optimistic thinking. “Well, let’s hope he doesn’t do that.”

Meanwhile, Diego’s hand tightens on Lila’s thigh while he pulls her in and kisses her hair, closing his eyes as he inhales.

And that’s Five’s limit. He pointedly checks his watch and says, “Alright, I think it’s time for me head out. I should really go into the office tomorrow and get a headstart on the week.”

Diego disentangles himself. “Bro, on a Saturday? Come on, one more round. Remember Luther’s wedding? You were destroyed, and the next day, fine!” His voice shifts into something more sincere. “Look man, have some fun in your young body while you have it.”

Guilt meets jealousy in Five’s gut, and the mixture burns.

Lila puts her hand over Diego’s on her own thigh, reminding him, “You do know that one of us needs to drive home, right?”

“You can stay the night here!” Luther interjects helpfully. “Most of the bedrooms are totally ready for guests.”

Lila’s face paints a “no”, but Diego’s lights up with hope.

Luther ponders for a moment. “I think Five’s old room has been cleaned recently. That’s probably your best bet.”

Shit. The cigarette smell. It could be a dead giveaway. The same realization dawns on Lila’s face.

“You know what?” Five affects a casual tone. “I might as well stay too, if that’s okay. We’re actually not too far from the office.”

Luther is ecstatic. “Of course! Okay, you take your old room, and Lila and Diego can stay in one of the second-floor bedrooms. Viktor’s is taken, obviously, but I’ll go up and check the others.”

“Great.” Five smiles joylessly into his dimples. He watches Luther scampering out of the room, then drags his attention back to the remaining group. Lila looks at him gratefully, and he meets her eyes for a second, trying to signal that it’s not a problem.

In reality, though, he’s just lost his best excuse to put distance between himself and his idiot brother, and he’s stuck here for the entire night. His stomach turns knowing he will have to fall asleep one floor up from the two of them.

He can do this. He’s a goddamn CIA agent and the Commission’s best assassin. He’s been trained to withstand psychological torture. This is nothing.

Diego, as usual, is testing his patience, going right back to pawing at Lila. “Hell yea, you and me, all night, no kids.” His voice drops. “Almost like staying in a hotel.”

Klaus shoots Five a sympathetic, long-suffering look. Then he turns to say to the married couple, good-naturedly, “I’d tell you both to get a room, but it seems like you’re using our childhood home to save some cash.”

Five holds back a snort. Figuring that little dig at Diego is likely going to be the last enjoyable moment for the evening for him, he decides to try again to retreat.

“Okay, either way I do have to go to bed. Like I said, work tomorrow.” He gets up and addresses the group, “Goodnight everyone.”

Diego doesn’t protest this time, too focused on Lila now. She pulls away for a second. “See you in the morning,” she offers Five.

The rest of the group echoes various farewells back to him. He nods and leaves, thankful he managed to keep his head and make a smooth exit.

The smell of cigarettes does still linger in his upstairs bedroom, so he pulls open the window again. He changes into a pair of flannel pajama pants he keeps at Luther’s, folded neatly in the dresser. 

By the time he’s ready for bed, the smell has been aired out. He lays in the dark and stares at the ceiling. In the silence, he feels a tug on his mind back to Lila. He’s tempted to turn her over and over in his thoughts, examine their fucked-up situation and tear it apart until a clean solution presents itself. One that involves Lila returning to his arms repeatedly would be nice.

During the apocalypse, he used to do the same. Strategizing his next meal turned to fantasizing about food he’d never taste again. Trying to piece together how his family died turned into grandiose hero fantasies. He eventually built up the mental fortitude to stop playing that game, at least long enough to get some rest. He exhales slowly while his muscles relax. The doomed, longing circles slowly wind down, until finally he drifts off to sleep.

Lila’s stomach is in knots, and Diego’s not helping. Her skin is starting to crawl with overstimulation. She fights it off, telling herself that Deigo’s touch should be familiar. He places another kiss on her cheek, and she winces internally.

She knows she could shut this down any time. But Diego was so excited, looking forward to time alone with her. For weeks now, he’d been trying to rekindle something like romance between them. And hadn’t that been what she wanted from him? For him to stop acting like she was the enemy, like their family was a burden? She clearly remembers being so lonely, feeling so far away from him.

She leans back into the cushions and downs the beer she’s been nursing. With Five gone, at least she can finally let her guard down.

The pizza dwindles, and Diego pours out shots for everyone. A pleasant buzz envelops Lila, and it starts to feel more natural to return Diego’s affection. Encouraged, Diego escalates, dropping hints to go upstairs together.

Lila accepts. On top of everything else she’s done, she can’t bring herself to disappoint him. And at least now this stressful evening will finally come to an end.

They retrace the steps she’s already taken once today. She stumbles a little on the stairs this time. Earlier, this was exciting, leading her to an unknown. Now the path in front of her is well-defined, one she can mechanically follow to its conclusion, like some lifeless woman-shaped object.

Sometimes she does feels like one, being constrained into specific and inflexible positions by the weight of her responsibilities. The monotony of it all hardening her into plastic.

Diego’s old bedroom seems comfortable. Not as recently made-up as Five’s, but perfectly fine for tonight. Luther has upgraded the rooms to be more appropriate for adult guests, twin sized beds having been replaced with queens.

As soon as they’re both across the threshold, Diego kisses her. He closes the door behind them and holds her up against it. There was a time when this would have taken her breath away.

She stops him. “Let’s get ready for bed. You know, wash up and everything.”

“Come on, afterwards. Seize the moment.” He fumbles with the zipper on her skirt.

Are they having a moment?

“Right. It can wait.” She kisses him back, trying to mirror his enthusiasm. His strong arms envelop her as they fall to the bed.

She’s acutely aware that Five is in the same house, and thoughts of him begin to invade her mind. She tries to focus, but wherever Diego touches her, Five’s hands are there too. When he kisses her, she can taste Five again. Eventually, she closes her eyes and gives herself over to the fantasy, taking pleasure in it. It feels like her deepest betrayal yet.

Hours later, Diego is still passed out, lying peacefully beside her, and she can’t get back to sleep. She feels empty and numb where their bodies touch, but the guilt is worse, weighing her down.

She knows where things with Five are leading. Discovery. Divorce. Breaking up her children’s home. Losing her newfound family.

Before Diego, the only person she had really loved was her mum. Supposedly, it was the Handler who taught Lila that relationships were about using people. But in truth, when it came to manipulation, Lila was a natural. Maybe there had always been something wrong with her. And now she’s contagious, wrecking not only her own family, but taking Diego’s and Five’s down with her.

Maybe destruction is what she’s after, what powers the electricity between her and Five. Maybe that’s why her skin lights up at his caress, why his kisses feel like fire.

Somehow, even at the bottom of the shame spiral, she’s still thinking about her brother-in-law.

And it’s really not a surprise, is it? It’s impossible, ignoring his presence when he’s just one floor above her. After all, the sleeping arrangements weren’t her idea. It’s not like Diego knew any better, her conscience reminds her. Okay, regardless, she just needs to resist. Stop arguing with herself, stop guiltily replaying every illicit detail, just shut it all down for a few more hours. Just get through the night to tomorrow morning. Without doing anything else really stupid.

The door opens with a soft click. Five bolts upright and immediately reaches for his gun on the bedside table. Early dawn light streams through his window, falling on Lila, barefoot, wearing loose gym shorts and a white men’s T-shirt, likely borrowed from Viktor. The bright sunrays illuminate her hair, giving a delicate halo effect.

“Shh! Try not to wake up the whole house, you paranoid freak,” Lila silently closes the door behind her, locking herself in with him.

Five exhales and drops his head back on the pillow, leaving his gun in its place. “Jesus, Lila, don’t sneak up on me like that.” His heart is still pounding. “I could have shot you.”

She rolls her eyes. “So dramatic.” She plops down on the foot of the bed.

Okay, so she’s in his bed. Obviously not wearing a bra. What’s his next move? With the adrenaline still streaming into his system as the only antidote for his morning grogginess, he can’t come up with a proper strategy. He needs some coffee.

Lila climbs up over his legs, mischief playing on her face.

I guess she’ll take the lead then. He props himself up on his elbows to keep her in his sight.

She stops at his waistband, brushing her hand over him through his flannel pajama pants. His body responds immediately, something he’s gotten used to again after years in his younger form.

“Happy to see me?” she teases, pleased with herself.

Yes, always. “I’m not sure yet. Lila, what are you—”

She pulls down his bottoms and catches his cock in her hand, ending that conversation rather efficiently.

He lets out a surprised gasp, bucking his hips up towards her. So much for my self-controlled and confident act. She wasn’t playing fair though, pouncing on him like this before he’s fully awake and caffeinated.

Lila dips down and takes the head of his dick into her mouth, prompting an embarrassingly loud moan from him. “God, that feels amazing.” He lays his head back down and tilts his chin up.

She holds the base and swirls her tongue against the sensitive tip as she slowly bobs up and down. It’s incredibly pleasurable, and overwhelming first thing in the morning like this.

Five’s thoughts start to scatter. What exactly is she playing at here? Was this supposed to be her getting even after yesterday? Or maybe she was showing off? That last one would make sense, she’s so goddamn good at this.

Lila releases him to catch her breath, using her hand to maintain a rhythm while she explores his inner thighs with her lips. His skin tingles with the sensation, making him gasp.

She moves up and appreciatively kisses just above where his pubic hair meets his abs. “You know, you’re really fit,” she admits between kisses, “why do you always hide it under suits?”

Five tries to think up a clever reply, but instead an earnest compliment tumbles out. “You look good too.”

At that, Lila opens her mouth and licks his lower abs. He bucks his hips up into her hand.

Her face breaks out into a wide, conspiratorial smile before she goes back to sucking his cock. She takes him in deeper this time, keeping her lips wrapped around him snugly. Five feels himself pushing all the way in and against the back of her mouth, threatening her throat as she starts to move faster.

Okay, now he’s really moaning. And he might have just moaned her name? Yup, he definitely did, because he just said it again. He’s losing himself in the dazed feeling of her warm mouth. In the comfort of waking up to her attention like this.

Five idly wonders what it would be like to wake up together every morning. He moves his hands down to tangle in her hair, realizing that it’s still slightly damp from the shower. Now, that’s a shame, because plans are vaguely forming in his head that will leave her in need of another one.

Wait. “You already took a shower?”

Lila pauses and pulls back, catching his implication. She looks off to the side, “Yeah… uhm...” She steels her mouth into a grim line and meets his eyes. “Look. Last night—”

“Stop, I don’t wanna know.” Five lets go of her hair and his hands curl into fists, then uncurl. What is this, some kind of blowjob consolation prize? Fuck that. He slowly presses back at her shoulders, keeping her a safe distance away. The logical part of his mind is frustratingly sluggish while the rest of his thoughts race all over the place. Flashing hypothetical imagery, cycling him through jealousy, anger, need, hurt, back to jealousy, all condensing into a single, delusional claim. She’s mine.

Incorrect, obviously.

Lila stays frozen, her face guarded. “Do you want me to go?” Her voice sounds flat, practical. Maybe a little resigned.

He has no right to be angry. This is the deal, the reality of the mess he’s gotten himself into. Her marriage may be on the rocks, but Five was under no illusion that it was dead, neither emotionally nor in the bedroom. Even if nothing happened last night, it would only be a matter of time.

Another possessive wave hits him. This morning at least, in this room, she can be his.

“You’re staying” Five says, determined. He gently moves her aside, pulls off his flannel bottoms and stands up, fully naked. He pulls her up to standing for a rough kiss, and she grins into his mouth. He feels her up under her white T-shirt, finding her breasts and skimming over her hard nipples. He lifts the shirt up, and she raises her arms cooperatively. Then he tosses it aside and turns her around, pulling her back to his chest. “Bend over.” For me.

Lila complies, making a show of it and grinding back into him on her way down. Jesus, how does she look so good when she moves like that? Five yanks off her loose gym shorts and underwear in one pull, then runs his fingers through her folds. She feels like molten honey. He grabs a pillow and puts it under her to adjust the height, and then, without thinking, he plunges all the way in. It’s like heaven melting directly onto his cock, and he can’t get enough.

She grabs fistfuls of his sheets and whimpers breathlessly into his comforter as he pounds into her. After a few moments of helplessly taking it, she braces against the bed and shoves her hips back in time to meet his.

Her hair tumbles over her shoulders, and the skin on her back is practically glowing in the early morning light. His eyes move down to her perfect ass, smacking rhythmically against his lower abs. He pulls back and gives it a firm slap, earning a muffled groan. He can’t help himself, alright? It’s this position, with its amazing view, and the ability to adjust her hips and keep her angled exactly right. She’s completely under his control, completely his.

Something tightens in his chest. It’s still not enough. She’s too far away. He pulls out. “Turn around. I wanna look at you.”

“Alright, let me catch my breath for a second,” She’s panting as she obediently flips over. He waits a beat, letting her recover, but she eagerly pulls him close again.

Five lines himself up and thrusts back in, and she responds by wrapping her legs around him. He pulls her up to him, catching her mouth in his as she clasps her hands around his neck. He leans them both back down onto the bed, burying his face in the crook of her neck, breathing her in as he fucks her. She clings tightly to him.

He places light kisses on her face, starting at her cheek, up to the tip of her nose. He leans his forehead against hers, and the hunger that’s been driving him is briefly sated.

Lila whines, protesting his slowing tempo.

Okay, at this point, he’ll give her anything she wants. He stands up straight again, then repositions her legs vertically against his chest and picks up the pace.

Five reaches down to touch her mouth, and she responds by sucking on his fingers. He takes the hint, and once she releases them, he moves his hand down to her center. Her eyes flutter shut as he makes small, slow circles. He turns his head to the side and kisses her ankle, drawing a little gasp from her, then starts thrusting deeply, which in this position means all the way to the hilt.

“That’s it… more. Faster,” she begs.

He works his fingers more rapidly, simultaneously increasing the speed of his thrusts. Her moans are getting louder, but he can’t bring himself to care who hears. After teetering on the edge for what feels like eternity, she finally cries out her release. He feels her tighten rhythmically around him while her hips undulate in waves of pleasure.

He’s seconds away himself when he realizes that his condoms are sitting uselessly in the drawer below his gun. Shit.

“Lila, quick, where can I…?”

Her eyes widen with a similar realization. “Wherever. On my stomach.”

Wherever? That prompts some interesting imagery, and fuck, now he’s coming. He pulls out and spills the rest of it onto her stomach.

Five holds her gaze as their breathing starts to slow together. He smiles affectionately at her, touches a lock of her hair. She glances down at the mess with a smirk.

“Sorry…” his cheeks heat up. He wants to give an explanation, but he’s coming up empty. Sorry that I got so caught up in fucking away my jealousy, toward my own brother by the way, that I completely forgot about the prophylactics sitting no more than two feet away. He sighs. That inner monologue makes him cringe more than his apocalyptic ramblings to Dolores.

“Don’t worry about it,” she shrugs. “Wouldn’t say no to a tissue though.”

“Of course.” He gets up and looks around, finding a white washcloth instead. “This’ll have to do.”

“Cheers,” she snatches it out of his hand before he can help.

He puts his pajama pants back on and rubs the back of his neck, feeling useless as she wipes herself off. He finds her shorts and T-shirt, places them gingerly next to her. She nods, gaze fixed on the ground.

Lila gets dressed again as she stands up. She takes in a breath, then squares her shoulders to him.

He knows what she’s gearing up for, and he’s not ready yet. He abruptly grabs her and pulls her in for another kiss. He hopes this morning she’s as hungry for contact afterwards as she had been yesterday.

She melts into him. He knew it. After a few moments, though, she pulls away “Five…”

“Shh…” He sits on the edge of the bed. Wraps his arms around her and brings her close. “Just stay a bit longer.”

“I can’t,” she breathes, nestling into him.

He pulls her down with him to lie together on the bed. “Just for a minute,” he bargains.

She settles on top of him and lays her head on his bare chest. Listens to his heartbeat.

He rests his chin on her head and holds her. Her breathing slows. It’s so comfortable, how they fit together. Peaceful. He tries to etch this moment into his mind, noting how the light slants across the bed, catching on her hair and skin. How soft her hair feels. Her smell. He records every detail, so he can turn it over later in his memory, replay it all again and again.

“Five?” she pushes herself up to look at him.

“Yeah?” He gives her a tender smile.

“What are we doing? How did we let this happen?” Her eyes search his.

“I don’t know.” He smooths down her hair. He feels like, whatever he says next, it will break the spell. He hesitates, trying to hold onto the moment a little longer. “Does it matter?”

She frowns.

Nice, he thinks. Women love nihilism first thing in the morning.

“Yeah, it matters.” Lila casts about for a solid argument, a worst-case scenario. “What if we destroy our family, and they never recover?”

“Then they never recover.” His voice is gentle, but it’s a harsh truth. It could happen, might already be set in motion. He can’t see himself recovering from this.

“How can you say that?” She pushes herself off of him, offended. Five aches at the absence. She’s standing now, facing him, so he gets up reluctantly to meet her. It’s a frustrating, inevitable pattern with her.

“That really was the last time, Five.” She says, resolved. “It’s over.”

“You know what? That line gets less convincing every time.” His eyes narrow, and his voice is just a little too harsh, covering a twinge of pain he feels at her words. Where does she get off, interrupting his perfectly good sleep to suck him off, let him fuck her, and then tell him to hit the road? What kind of messed up game is that?

Her voice is serious. “I mean it. I can’t keep doing this to my family.”

He sighs. His plan had been to wind her up then leave her wanting more. He had fantasized about patiently waiting while she wrestled with her desire, not being able to get him out of her system. She’d eventually cave, turn up at his place late some night. Then they’d have hours of free, wild passion. No keeping quiet, no cover story, just his whole flat all to themselves.

But that plan was now in shambles, and he doesn’t have any cards left to play. “I know,” he says softly.

His acquiescence seems to drain away some of her own certainty. She hesitates, looking torn. After a beat, though, her face resets with determination, and she turns away to leave. Right on cue, running back to my loving brother, he thinks bitterly.

He locks the door behind her, contemplating falling back asleep. Letting this surreal dalliance fade away into a dream. He can’t bring himself to touch the sheets, though. Instead, he briskly changes back into his suit and holsters his gun. He gathers the rest of his stuff, tidying the room as he goes.

The last thing to do is to straighten up the bed. He stares at it, paralyzed, and a comforting memory of Dolores surfaces. She always hated it when I didn’t clean up after myself. When the present sharpens back into focus, the bed has been made.

Done. Now it’s time to get the hell out of here and back to his own place.

On his way down the stairs, he catches the sound of a showerhead head turning on again in the second-floor bathroom.