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paint me like one of them dead girls by junieyes
Fandoms: Resident Evil - All Media Types
28 Dec 2025
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Summary
“Leon – Leon, shoot the eye! Shoot the eye!”
“You shoot the eye!”
“You trust me that much?!”
“I can duck!”
“Bullets?!”
Frantic and too anxious to use the handgun, you throw a flash grenade. It doesn’t do anything. Despite being chased by a mutated and inhuman monster, Leon still has time to throw you an incredulous look.
In your stupidity, you forgot to pull the pin.
(Alternatively: It is September 1998. You are nineteen years old and living in Racoon City. Or, you were, until about five days ago. Now you're just surviving, and badly at that. But hey, at least you've got Leon Kennedy by your side, right?)
(Alternatively alternatively: Your life sucks. The end.)
Series
- Part 1 of the alphabet virus
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 85,715
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Comments:
- 541
- Kudos:
- 4,420
- Bookmarks:
- 965
- Hits:
- 114,891
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
28 May 2026
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A Side of Ham by seeing_blue
Fandoms: A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms
08 Apr 2026
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Summary
At the tourney of Ashford Meadow, a particular servant meets a particular hedge knight and his squire.
All of Westeros will come to know the tale.
Series
- Part 4 of ASOIAF Fics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 52,802
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 10
- Comments:
- 259
- Kudos:
- 1,209
- Bookmarks:
- 465
- Hits:
- 15,738
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
17 Apr 2026
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A Bolt From The Blue by Sublimeinal_Messages
Fandoms: A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, game of thrones
04 Jun 2026
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Summary
"You should be so mad at me."
"Oh, furious," he panted, drawing her body closer to his. Beneath pretty blond lashes, his eyes were bright and twinkling. "Can't you tell?"
Daeron knew he meant to go down in history as another fail son of the Targaryen line—knew he’d die young, knew he’d do the same in life as he did in death: disappointing his father, his family, his name. He knew he’d never know love or passion unless it came out of the bottom of a cup or the skirts of a whore. He’d seen it all in his dreams.
He didn’t see Mariyam Storm and all that she’d be to him, until she shot him with her crossbow.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 92,403
- Chapters:
- 14/30
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 305
- Kudos:
- 856
- Bookmarks:
- 328
- Hits:
- 20,458
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
16 Apr 2026
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Summary
Vice Admiral Garp is undone by a sundress, strategic sabotage, and one very dangerous woman.
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
29 Mar 2026
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I Meant To Do That! - The Inquisitor Coyote Story by EmberLeo, SeabhacMhor
Fandoms: Dragon Age: Inquisition
07 Nov 2023
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Summary
A DragonAge Kink Prompt was requested:
"So, kind of like a modern girl in thedas situation, but instead of a person it's a god.
However, no one really believes that they are a god because the fade is interfering with their power. Until they physically go into the fade and boom! All the powers! How do the companions/LI react to that?"
-----Coyote volunteered.
-----
Updates as life and spoons allow.I promise I haven't abandoned the fic, and won't! And, frankly, couldn't. Coyote would probably sing "Three hundred bottles of beer on the wall" to me every night in my dreams until I relented, if I tried! XD
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 42,534
- Chapters:
- 27/?
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 433
- Kudos:
- 642
- Bookmarks:
- 204
- Hits:
- 11,927
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
26 Aug 2025
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Trident Tale by Jupiters_Witch
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
06 Sep 2021
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Summary
Moving to an island where everyone is big on the surf scene and other oceanic happenings might not have been the brightest idea for someone so afraid of anything that has to do with water. you make do by spending your days looking after the Bed & Breakfast, trying not to burn the house down when you fry a few eggs, and obsessively scrolling through Eijirou Kirishima’s social media page. He’ll never notice you, and you think you’re fine with that, until a mysterious force washes into Ms. Shuzenji’s pool after a particularly nasty storm.
Hitoshi Shinsou is a pain in the ass from the get-go, but you put up with him, fins and all, when he promises he can help unite you with your soulmate. The catch? The fish is hellbent on taking back what was stolen from him, and he won’t lift a gracious finger until he gets what he came for.
You’re helpless to lend him a hand, so long as you stay dry. Unless, of course, he has other plans.
You know how the saying goes: you rub his fins, he’ll rub yours.
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
24 Jul 2025
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Summary
Some would say they had each other at 'hello', You were amused by his "Fuck Off" more than anything in this small town.
Was it wrong to repeatedly bother the town's drunk on purpose? Nah.
Is it creepy to shower him in weird gifts? Of course not! You do that to everyone!
Should you continue attempting to make conversation with him while you block his way to work? Absolutely.Once you get close enough, you can convince him to marry you for tax benefits and be yours. Two birds, one stone.
Or:
Shane is a flustered, depressed bean, and the farmer is a classy woman, flexing on him and subtly seducing him with her charms~
I think the weak ass horny bitch arc is overrated. Stop being a clingy, stuttering, damsel in distress. So why not switch it up? This man ain't gonna know what tf he got himself into. ',:)
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
22 Jul 2025
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This Fucking Island by Shiloh_Rose
Fandoms: Tainted Grail: The Fall of Avalon (Video Game)
06 Jul 2025
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Summary
Modern woman finds herself in the middle of a lovecraftian/horror-version of the legend of King Arthur. Or something resembling a version of that legend, anyway. Fun times.
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
18 Jul 2025
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Summary
You looked up at the flag, the Jolly Roger they called it, and stared beyond towards the vast expanse of blue water. A tense ball of fire churning in the pits of your stomach was determined to make you throw up overboard.
You could handle this, you've read and watched enough stories to know how to get by. But there was just one tiny problem with this whole 'Transported into an Anime' predicament.
You never watched the show.
[Readers who never watched One Piece can still enjoy this fic, Readers who have watched One Piece will ENJOY this fic :)]
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 96,028
- Chapters:
- 20/?
- Comments:
- 249
- Kudos:
- 1,223
- Bookmarks:
- 271
- Hits:
- 39,091
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
04 Jul 2025
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Woes of Corporeality by spiteful_crow
Fandoms: Sherlock Holmes Chapter One (Video Game), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
11 Dec 2025
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Summary
•·················•·················•
A prank gone wrong, a sudden transformation, and the realisation that life will never be the same again.A "Jon becomes real" fanfic told from Jon’s perspective. It explores the ups and downs of being suddenly stuck in a physical body, and how this unexpected turn of events affects Jon's relationship with Sherlock.
After some consideration, I have decided to split this story into two parts. This is Part One
•·················•·················•
Series
- Part 1 of Woes of Corporeality
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
22 May 2025
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Where the Stars are F***ing Strange by Anoriath
Fandoms: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien, TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works & Related Fandoms, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings (Movies)
17 Jul 2022
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Summary
Plucked like a fish out of water, you try to make the best out of a bad situation in Bree. Then, one day, this Hozier-looking dude showed up at The Pony.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 125,483
- Chapters:
- 26/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 646
- Kudos:
- 1,013
- Bookmarks:
- 264
- Hits:
- 27,808
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
23 Apr 2025
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An Unexpected Journey by ValleyOfKings
Fandom The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings (Movies), The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
26 Oct 2024
Summary
The reader gets transported to Middle Earth and finds themselves at the beginning of the LOTR movies. She tags a long with the fellowship, becoming the tenth member and wreaks havok while saving the world.
- Words:
- 217,436
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 224
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
22 Apr 2025
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Post-War Blues by Zoop (zoop526)
Fandoms: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
06 Feb 2013
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Summary
What's an Uruk to do when his neatly ordered life is thrown into upheaval from an unexpected source? Run like hell, of course! Set post-War of the Ring.
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
06 Apr 2025
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What Darkness Reveals by Malady335
Fandoms: The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, Middle-earth: Shadow of Mordor (Video Games)
02 Feb 2021
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Summary
A woman's attempt at escaping her shitty marriage ends up getting her caught up on the wrong side of the Black Gate and stumbling into the hands of the least liked orc in all of Mordor.
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
31 Mar 2025
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Are You Scared of the Man in the Walls by eerie_enchantress
Fandoms: 文字化化 | Homicipher (Video Game)
15 Mar 2025
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Summary
[1:31 AM]
girl I know this is going to sound insane but there's a guy in the wallsBookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
18 Mar 2025
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Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
15 Mar 2025
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Summary
"Maybe that's what she needed right now; to sleep with someone without any emotional connection, with out any feelings at all just pure carnal desire." Grieving after the loss of Graham, Emma goes looking for a distraction, she doesn't expect to start falling for the man she goes to for it.
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
25 Feb 2025
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How Not to Flunk Your Way Through Shiz: A Side Character’s Survival Guide by GirlUncleWineAuntEmoCousin
Fandoms: Wicked - All Media Types, Wicked (Movie 2024)
28 Nov 2025
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Summary
You didn’t just not peak in high school - you crash-landed straight into the pit. Your downfall started the second they shoved you into the ensemble after what was, frankly, an objectively amazing audition. But of course the leads went to the theater department nepo babies and the choir kids with parents who “donated” lighting equipment.
So yeah. You hated musicals now. Theatre, Broadway, all that good stuff - instant fight-or-flight. And when the Wicked movie promo was plastered everywhere for months? You were living in your own personal hell.
Which is exactly why the universe decided to clown on you and drop you into Oz of all places. And not as Glinda or Elphaba or even someone with a name. No, you woke up as a literal background extra who probably doesn’t even get listed in the program! The magical equivalent of “Girl #3.”
But you refused to get stuck in the ensemble ever again. Not here, not now. If fate was going to cast you as a nobody, fine - you’d just rewrite the script.
Even if it killed you, you were getting a line. Or two. (Maybe even a solo if the universe felt generous!)
Hell, while you're at it, you might even snag a love interest or two!
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
04 Feb 2025
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Summary
Katel was young when it happened, her leg became twisted and damaged.
Aju-Lei came all the way to Skyrim from Black Marsh to find his fortune.
On a cold, snowy day just like any other, their lives would intertwine.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 58,590
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 99
- Kudos:
- 366
- Bookmarks:
- 83
- Hits:
- 7,388
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
13 Nov 2024
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Summary
The Dragonborn makes a very bad decision while in Cidhna Mine. This action will have consequences.
Series
- Part 1 of Timeline: A King's Rose
Bookmarked by DysfunctionalDevilry
13 Nov 2024