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broken still you breathe (breathe, breathe, just breathe) by Eternal_Peace_is_Overrated
Fandoms: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
17 May 2022
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Summary
“He’s not coming,” Luther says impatiently. “Let's just get this over with.”
“Who’s not coming?”
The voice sounds behind them suddenly, and all of them startle and whip around in synchronization.
“Klaus,” Luther hears himself say distantly. “You’re…here.”
Four tilts his head, bringing his hand to his lips and inhaling deeply around the cigarette dangling between his fingers. When he exhales, the smoke curls around his head like a halo before drifting into the air.
“Yeah, well, I would’ve gotten here sooner,” Four says around the cigarette. “But I just really didn’t want to.”
***
Number Four shows up to the funeral three hours late with an iced latte in one hand and a cigarette dangling from the other.
Or; Klaus fled the Academy the day they turned eighteen. He never looked back.
Ten years later, their father dies.
Number Four returns.And none of them quite know what to do with this new version of their black sheep brother.
AKA: Klaus single-handedly stops the apocalypse. It really wasn't that hard, so if everyone could stop looking at him like that, that would be great, thanks.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,653
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 13
- Comments:
- 190
- Kudos:
- 4,176
- Bookmarks:
- 1,019
- Hits:
- 34,883
Bookmarked by beetletooth
06 Jul 2026
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There is a knock at the door. With a heavy sigh, Klaus untangles himself from the mess of Dave's limbs with a mutter of 'I've got it'. They rarely get visitors out here, their closest neighbour being about three miles away, and Klaus didn't even hear a car or see any headlights outside.
He opens his door, expecting to see old Mrs Richards asking for one of the dog treats they always keep for the occasions her dog runs off. He does not, however, expect to see his siblings - all of them, standing outside his door. Well, Five is being held up by Diego, and Vanya is being carried by Luther, but they are all there, on his doorstep, on this evening in 1970.
Or, Dave doesn't die, but he and Klaus get injured and discharged. They move to a little cottage in the countryside and live together, perfectly content, until they get a group of surprise visitors. Five tries to send them all into the past to avoid the end of the world, and is drawn right to Klaus.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 62,279
- Chapters:
- 17/?
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 1,558
- Kudos:
- 4,634
- Bookmarks:
- 1,089
- Hits:
- 66,803
Bookmarked by beetletooth
06 Jul 2026
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Something was wrong with Harry and no one else seems to notice but Ron. Well, he wasn't one third of the Golden Trio for nothing. He was going to get to the bottom of it, even if it meant coming to grips with Malfoy's presence.
Bookmarked by beetletooth
04 Jul 2026
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Secondhand Relief by XxTheDarkLordxX for EasySarcasm
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
24 Jan 2026
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“In case it has escaped your notice, this is Malfoy that we are talking about. Why the fuck would he ever help us? His dad’s one of them for fucks sake!”
“Harry has been fucking him for months! I think we stand a good chance.”
Sometimes, he really wished that Voldemort had killed him as a baby.
Bookmarked by beetletooth
03 Jul 2026
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Someone is healing people in Muggle hospitals in the dead of night and risking the Statute of Secrecy. Harry will get to the bottom of it, but does he really want to stop them?
Bookmarked by beetletooth
03 Jul 2026
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Soulmarks were supposed to be a blessing. They were supposed to be something worth celebrating. Soulmarks were cherished, loved, and proudly displayed.
Draco's soulmark was ugly, pulsing, and slowly killing him.
Bookmarked by beetletooth
03 Jul 2026
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The war didn't entirely end with the Battle of Hogwarts. A year later, Head Auror Harry Potter resolves to sacrifice a little more of himself in the hope of putting an end to the countless acts of revenge between the two former sides. Following an ancient ritual, if he succeeds in founding a new bloodline with an old enemy, peace will be assured.
A tale of two young men who are trying, of the wizarding world wonders and of hope in the dark.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 139,180
- Chapters:
- 40/40
- Comments:
- 3,150
- Kudos:
- 7,284
- Bookmarks:
- 1,894
- Hits:
- 266,463
Bookmarked by beetletooth
02 Jul 2026
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The owl squeezed itself through the rusting bars of his Azkaban cell and flew to the ground, hooting in triumph and waddling around on the dusty floor. Draco grasped the owl gently in his fist to still it, then withdrew the letter from the mail bag.
His heart thudded. Who was contacting him? His mother? Pansy? Not one of the Death Eaters, surely?
Then he unrolled the page and let out a disbelieving huff.
It was a fucking survey.
Well. They wanted a response? He’d give them one.
- On a scale of 1 (not at all) to 4 (very), how clean are Azkaban’s facilities? — Fuck you
- On a scale of 1 (not at all) to 4 (very), how humane has your treatment been at Azkaban? — Fuck this
- Any additional comments? — Fuck off
P.S. Your owl is insane
—
In which a well-meaning researcher, Hermione Granger, runs a study without realizing who Participant 1 is.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,082
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Comments:
- 370
- Kudos:
- 1,940
- Bookmarks:
- 409
- Hits:
- 22,527
Bookmarked by beetletooth
24 Jun 2026
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This fic was written as part of Trick or Treat Gift Exchange hosted by AdaLovelaced and FaeOrabel. This fic is for AloYrrehc and my prompt was:
A: Are you the big spoon or the little spoon
B: i'm the knife
C (from another room) THEY'RE THE LITTLE SPOON
Enjoy some silly fluff!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,041
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 33
- Kudos:
- 601
- Bookmarks:
- 61
- Hits:
- 4,252
Bookmarked by beetletooth
24 Jun 2026
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Summary
Hermione Granger needs a refuge and she finds it in a sweet coffeeshop owned by an elderly woman with a vast array of tea and delectable pastries. Only Hermione isn't prepared to learn who exactly is baking the treats providing her solace. An ode to tea, pastries, and the magic of a coffeeshop. Yes, it's a trope, and we love it!
Did you want Draco Malfoy sporting a man-bun while baking delectable pastries that melt the Golden Girl's heart? Of course you did.
(written for DFW's Trope Fest...hence the trope)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,000
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 89
- Kudos:
- 838
- Bookmarks:
- 158
- Hits:
- 7,563
Bookmarked by beetletooth
24 Jun 2026
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The Magic of Macarons by itscometothis for floorcoaster
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
01 Nov 2022
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Summary
Hermione vaguely considers murdering her deskmate on a daily basis. This time it's because he steals her macarons.
But when something more serious causes her to move beyond their banter, she'll find more than she bargained for out of Draco Malfoy.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,210
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 37
- Kudos:
- 700
- Bookmarks:
- 112
- Hits:
- 4,788
Bookmarked by beetletooth
24 Jun 2026
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Summary
Draco Malfoy thought he had reasonable expectations for his mandatory Eighth Year at Hogwarts, where he would be confined to the grounds as part of his probation. Isolation, hatred, and passing his NEWTs were really all he had in mind.
What he wasn't anticipating:
1) Having a small firstie latch onto him like a bloody koala
2) Said firstie adopting an erkling as if they didn’t feed on children.To protect his little nuisance, he’ll have to seek help from uncomfortable places, including the Swottiest Witch of Her Age. Joy of all joys.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 50,035
- Chapters:
- 12/12
- Collections:
- 37
- Comments:
- 1,727
- Kudos:
- 12,735
- Bookmarks:
- 4,749
- Hits:
- 320,614
Bookmarked by beetletooth
24 Jun 2026
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Summary
In third year, Hermione Granger punches Draco Malfoy.
He retaliates by stealing her first kiss.
Somehow it doesn't end there.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 75,768
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Collections:
- 18
- Comments:
- 1,095
- Kudos:
- 13,487
- Bookmarks:
- 4,012
- Hits:
- 347,283
Bookmarked by beetletooth
23 Jun 2026
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Summary
Derek Hale hates libraries.
Unfortunately, not all books can be ordered on Amazon.
(Or: in which Derek is a grumpy omega writer, and Stiles is an annoyingly attractive alpha special collections librarian.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,288
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 295
- Kudos:
- 9,629
- Bookmarks:
- 2,177
- Hits:
- 93,101
Bookmarked by beetletooth
09 Jun 2026
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Summary
"Bloody hell," Ron whistles, low. "Girl Malfoy."
Aquila Malfoy sits on the stool, and McGonagall drops the Hat on her head.
"Gryffindor!" the Hat yells, without even a pause.
or, the one where draco malfoy has a younger sister
Series
- Part 12 of and several bad jokes later
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,490
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 87
- Kudos:
- 3,329
- Bookmarks:
- 472
- Hits:
- 22,697
Bookmarked by beetletooth
01 Jun 2026
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Summary
Harry wants some tiramisu. Draco wants to destroy The Daily Prophet. Eventually, they find a way to make it work.
During their shared eighth year in Hogwarts, Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy can usually be seen together, exchanging barbs and laughing together while walking around Hogsmeade. However, one pesky journalist might finally push these boys into something more than friendship.
Bookmarked by beetletooth
27 May 2026
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Summary
"It'll be all right, Harry. It's been like this before, but you two always seems to patch it up again."
Harry shook his head. Not this time, not anymore. This was it, the dream that had been him and Ginny was over.Now Harry was forced to build himself a new life, for him and his children. What better place than the old house Sirius left him. But it's not really fit for a family with small children as it is and Harry needs help.
Bookmarked by beetletooth
27 May 2026
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Summary
Harry's jeans are getting tight. Draco loves it.
Bookmarked by beetletooth
26 May 2026
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Summary
Harry wasn’t quite in the same shape he once was – no longer an Auror trainee or a Quidditch star – but he didn’t mind his extra squish … until the press started commenting on how he’d ‘let himself go.’
Draco wasn’t bothered by it. In fact, he rather liked it – though he’d never admit that aloud. Despite what Pansy thought, he did possess some self-worth. He wasn’t a slag for humiliation.
When the two find themselves working alongside each other, and Harry is shirtless and sweaty on more than one occasion … well, what did you think would happen?
If your answer isn’t ‘they’d shag against a garage door,’ then you’re wrong.
Bookmarked by beetletooth
26 May 2026
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Kept in Cages by ihopeyoubothstaysafefromharm, sweet_s0rr0w
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
07 Aug 2022
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Summary
Deep in the heart of the Ministry lies the Beast Division: a hidden room where ancient beasts roam, and winged creatures soar, and grumpy giant ferrets eat all your biscuits unless you keep them well hidden. Draco Malfoy would know – he’s been working there for five years now, after all.
Meanwhile, on Level One, ex-Golden Boy Harry Potter is stuck in another interminable policy meeting, completely unaware of the mysterious comings and goings just three floors below. But when a giant snake emergency requires the assistance of a Parselmouth, Harry finds himself thrust, unprepared, into Draco’s weird and wonderful world – and naturally, he can’t keep away…
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 76,823
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 312
- Kudos:
- 2,670
- Bookmarks:
- 868
- Hits:
- 58,241
Bookmarked by beetletooth
26 May 2026